I reach the gazebo, and I lift my eyes. Tesla’s sitting on top of our table, looking out across the park. My eyes ghost along her profile, and I notice she’s biting her lip.
She’s nervous, too.
I continue to stare until she finally turns her head in my direction. Our eyes lock, and she offers me a soft smile.
It’s all the encouragement I need.
“Hi.”
“Hi,” she replies. She looks a little pale and very tired, but I’ve still never seen anything so beautiful. “Thanks for meeting me.”
“Thanks for calling me.”
I climb on top of the picnic table, careful not to touch her. I have no idea how she feels or what she’s thinking, and I don’t want to push my luck.
“How are you, Tesla?”
She’s quiet for a long time until she finally replies, “I’m miserable.”
It’s all I can do not to reach for her. It’s painful, having this much distance between us when she’s so close.
“I’m sorry.”
Tesla’s gaze finds mine. “Are you really?”
Her tone isn’t accusing. She genuinely wants to know if I’m sorry for kicking that guy’s ass. I knew she’d ask, because that’s how she is. Straight-forward and constantly calling me on my bullshit.
“I’m sorry that I scared you. I’m sorry that you had to see it. I’m sorry that you lost your job because of me. But no, I’m not sorry for what I did. I’d do it again in a heartbeat.”
She doesn’t seem surprised by my answer.
“Will it always be like that? Any time a guy gives me an ounce of attention, you’ll kick his ass, too?”
If he touches you, yes.
I don’t say it aloud. I’m not a complete idiot.
I don’t have to say it. She knows.
“Everything about us is so intense,” Tesla says quietly. “The way we look at each other. The way we touch. The way we kiss. The way you make me feel—”
“How do I make you feel?”
She turns her head and looks me right in the eye. She’s brave. So independent and strong.
“Like I’m all that matters.”
“You are all that matters.”
I take the chance and lift my hand, gently drifting it across her cheek. She doesn’t flinch or try to move away.
“You are,” I whisper, and her eyes dart to my lips. I lick my own in anticipation before tenderly kissing the corner of her mouth. She sighs, and it’s the sweetest sound I’ve never heard.
“Please don’t be afraid, Tesla.”
“I’m not afraid of you.”
I let my lips linger on her cheek, and my entire body trembles with the effort of not covering her entire mouth with mine.
“What are you afraid of?”
I close my eyes when her hand cups my face.
“Jax, I can’t live like this. I can’t worry that some random guy at the supermarket is going to get the shit beat out of him because he dares to ask for my number.”
“Does that happen a lot?”
“It happens,” she replies. “I don’t need another father. I have one. One is plenty.”
“Tesla, I’m always going to protect you—”
“And that’s fine, if I need protecting. I didn’t need protecting with that guy at the club. Do you really think he’s the first guy to ever break the rules? He only touched my thigh, and I warned him. He didn’t let go, and I was just getting ready to kick him out when you showed up. You completely overreacted, and I’m just not sure I can deal with this level of intensity when it comes to my security. I’ll suffocate.”
She closes her eyes, and I can feel her slipping through my fingers.
I can’t let that happen.
I’ll suffocate.
So I take a deep breath.
“I can’t lose you. I love you.”
I’ve never said those words before. Only to Tara, and probably my parents when I was a kid. But never to a woman.
But I mean them.
I mean them.
“Please say you believe me.”
Tesla gently caresses my face. “I do believe you, but I need you to do more than tell me. I need you to show me.”
I instantly think of the sky blue building, but I know that’s not what she means.
“I’ll show you. If you’ll let me.”
She smiles and leans close, brushing her lips across my cheek.
“I love you, too,” she whispers against my ear.
“Close your eyes, Tesla.”
“The car hasn’t even stopped.”
Jax sighs loudly, and I give in, because he’s just too excited.
I’m excited, too.
The past month has been full of little surprises, just like this one. He’s taken my challenge quite seriously, and every day he shows me how much he loves me.
At first, it had been a struggle. While thoughtful and sweet, the daily delivery of roses and the reservations at fancy restaurants wasn’t exactly what I’d had in mind. Jax got the hint pretty quickly—with a little help from his sister—and he’d found inexpensive ways to show me how much he cared. The gazebo had become our favorite place in the city, and when the weather was nice, that’s where we’d have lunch. He was also working with a personal trainer at the gym, and the exercise was really helping him to work off steam and keep his temper in check.
Of course, his desire to take care of me had led to one big argument, and that was when he’d offered me a job with his company. I was stubborn and refused his help, which pissed him off since he felt responsible for my unemployment. Instead, I began teaching dance to five and six year olds at the local youth club downtown. Dance teachers are still woefully underpaid, but it’s a job, and I enjoy it.
The month has been a struggle in other ways, too. Jax and I are finding it increasingly difficult to keep our hands to ourselves. Our kisses are sweet and tender, and while I appreciate the fact that he’s holding himself back, I’m ready to move forward.
I have a plan.
“Why are you smiling like that?” he asks.
“I was just thinking about surprises,” I tell him, careful to keep my eyes closed as Gus drives us through the city traffic.
Jax squeezes my hand. “I like surprising you.”
“I like surprising you, too.”
“Hmm. Are you keeping secrets from me?” His finger slides against my wrist, and the thrill of his touch is like a jolt of electricity through my veins.
“Y . . . yes.”
“Is it a good secret?”
“I think it’s a fantastic secret.”
He lifts my hand, pressing gentle kisses along my wrist, and I shiver.
“Cold?”
“No.”
My body trembles when his tongue teases my fingertip, and I’m grateful my eyes are still closed. The visual stimulation of seeing his tongue against my skin would cause me to climb into his lap, and that would totally ruin my surprise for later.
“Jax . . .”
It’s a plea. To stop. To not stop. To never stop.
No wonder guys think women are confusing, because we totally are.
“I’ll be good,” he says.
Damn it.
“Besides, we’re here. Keep your eyes closed, please?”
I nod, and I feel him move away from me. I hear a door open and close, and I know I’m alone.
Well, except for the driver.
“Gus?”
“Yes, Miss Jones?”
“How bad is it?”
“Excuse me?”
“The surprise. I just have a feeling it’s . . . a big one. I want to be prepared.”
Gus laughs. “I’m not sure you could prepare yourself, Miss Jones. It’s pretty epic.”
I sigh. “I was afraid of that.”
“Don’t be afraid. He’s very generous. It takes some getting used to, doesn’t it?”
“Yes.”
“I understand. Last year, my wife was diagnosed
with cancer.”
“Oh, Gus . . . ”
“It’s okay. We caught it early, but the doctor still recommended chemo, just to be sure. Mr. Monroe found us the best cancer specialist on the east coast and paid for every treatment, every prescription, and every doctor bill. It was very hard for me to accept his help, and if it’d been for me, I probably wouldn’t have. But it was for my wife. I love my wife.”
I’m close to tears. “Of course you do.”
“He’s a good man, Miss Jones. Don’t ever doubt that.”
Suddenly, my door opens.
“Are you read . . . Tesla, what’s wrong? Why are you crying?”
I must have been closer to tears than I thought.
“I’m fine,” I reply, wiping away my tears. “Can I open my eyes?”
“Not yet. Give me your hand.”
Warmth flows through me as I place my hand in his. He helps me out of the car. I hear voices and cars and buses, and I assume we’re still in the city.
“Let’s sit,” he says, and he pulls us down. “You can open your eyes.”
I blink against the sunlight and glance around. It looks familiar, and then I realize we’re just down the street from that sidewalk café he took me to see last month.
“Don’t turn around,” Jax murmurs. “I need to say something first.”
And then I remember this bench, and the building behind us. It was the piece of real estate Jax inspected the day we met at the café.
“You brought me to see your sky blue building?” I ask with an excited grin.
“Close. I brought you to see your sky blue building.”
I gasp and jump to my feet. I turn and look, and there it is. It’s sky blue and cream and as perfect as I imagined it would be.
“Mine?”
Jax is watching me closely. “Yours.”
“I . . . I don’t understand.”
“For your bakery.”
My bakery.
He bought me a building.
For my bakery.
Suddenly, the daily delivery of roses and the fancy restaurants don’t seem so extravagant after all.
She’s speechless.
I have no idea if that’s good.
Or bad.
It’s probably bad, because she hates when I spend money on her.
Her gaze is wide as she looks at the building.
Sky blue and cream.
It’s her dream come true, and I made it happen.
I swallow the bubble of anxiety that’s clenching my throat.
“Sweetheart?”
Tesla turns her head toward me. Her expression is one of complete and utter surprise, which is the perfect reaction, obviously. But there’s something else, and it’s something I never want to see.
Tears.
She’s in tears.
They roll down her cheeks, and I can’t stand it. I pull her into my arms and gently wipe them away.
“I know you’re going to say it’s too much, but it’s not. It’s all you’ve ever wanted, and I want to help you make your dreams a reality. It’s just a building, Tesla. It’s just walls and shelves and a long glass counter.”
“Don’t do that,” she says softly. “Don’t pretend this isn’t the most amazing thing ever.”
I smile, and the knot in my stomach begins to relax. “You think it’s the most amazing thing ever?”
I wrap my arms around her. She lays her head back against my shoulder as we gaze at the building.
“Almost,” she says.
I chuckle and nuzzle her neck. “Oh, I see. There’s something better?”
“Yes.”
She turns in my arms and places her hand against my rapidly beating heart.
“Of all the gifts, this one is the best.”
We kiss tenderly. And I’m ecstatic, because I know she’s going to accept it.
She’s accepted me—all of me. I wish I deserved her, but I know I don’t. No man ever could.
“Can we see inside?” she asks, and I hear the delight in the tremble of her voice.
“Of course.”
I fish the keys out of my pocket and place them in her palm.
“It’s the big silver one,” I tell her.
Her excited fingers fumble with the lock, but it finally cooperates, and we walk inside. There really isn’t much to see. I wasn’t kidding when I said it was just walls and shelves.
“We haven’t done much,” I explain as we walk toward the glass counter. “I wanted your input. I didn’t know if you wanted tables or booths or just . . .”
She isn’t listening. She’s just looking around, sliding her hand along the glass countertop. She’s making plans. The wheels are turning, and it makes me smile.
“It’s perfect,” she finally says. Her voice is soft and low and just completely awed.
“Yeah?”
Tesla nods. “Thank you seems so inadequate.”
“Just the fact that you’re accepting it without a fight is all the thanks I need.”
She reaches for my hand and gives it a squeeze.
“I’ve been saving for a down payment on a space. I didn’t have a particular place in mind. I didn’t dare look. I didn’t want to get my hopes up, you know?”
“Is this okay? I mean, did you want something bigger? Maybe something on the other side of town?”
She shakes her head. “No, Jax. This is perfect. Thank you.”
I pull her into my arms again and hug her close.
“I can’t believe you aren’t fighting me on this. I was sure I’d have to give you my speech.”
She giggles. “You prepared a speech?”
“Yeah, just a short one. It was basically just me on my knees, telling you how much I love you.”
She tilts her head, looking into my eyes.
“I love you, too.”
I smooth the hair away from her face before kissing her softly.
“And I love my bakery.”
“I’m so glad, baby.”
Her eyes soften. She loves when I call her that.
“Will you take me home, Jax?”
I can’t deny I’m surprised.
“Home? Don’t you want to look around some more?
Her hand drifts along my chest and down toward my navel. It leaves me breathless. And aching. All I do is ache for her, but I’m trying to be good. I’m trying to take it slow. I’m trying to let her lead.
“I want to come back tomorrow, but right now . . . right now, I want you to take me home with you. I have this overwhelming urge to show you how much I love my bakery . . . and you.”
She takes my hand, and I get my wish.
She leads.
And I follow.
I stare at myself in the full-length mirror in his bathroom. The black negligée leaves nothing to the imagination, and while I’ve danced in far less, I can’t deny that, in this moment, I’ve never felt so naked.
Exposed.
Bare.
He loves me.
I know it.
I feel it.
And I love him.
I’ve wanted this for so long. My attraction to Jax Monroe has called to me on a basic, elemental level. Animalistic and raw.
But now . . .
It’s so much more.
He owns every part of me.
My heart.
My soul.
And tonight, he’ll own my body, and I’ll have nothing left to give. He’ll have it all. Every last piece of me.
It’s amazing how much that doesn’t scare me.
I step out of the master bath and into his bedroom. He’s sitting in a chair, just as I requested. Music streams from his iPod.
And he’s naked.
Just as I requested.
He’s muscular and lean, and I can’t wait to explore every inch of him.
It might just take all night.
And most of tomorrow.
Jax’s fiery eyes meet mine, and then his appreciative gaze travels over me.
&n
bsp; Warming me. Heating me. Burning me.
“God, Tesla . . .”
I move closer, letting my hips sway to the music as I make my way over to him. His hands reach for me, and I let him pull me closer.
“Just so there’s no misunderstanding . . .” I say softly. “I was always planning to rock your world tonight. This isn’t about showing my appreciation for my new bakery.”
Jax grins, running his hands beneath my gown and along the curve of my ass.
“You’ve already rocked my world, Tesla. This is just a very, very happy bonus.” He gently trails his finger along the lace. “And I love this. You’re the sexiest thing I’ve ever seen. But it’s got to go.”
“But I wanted to dance for you. Strip for you.”
“As much as I’d love to see you do that, I just . . . I just can’t let you. Not our first time, anyway. Maybe another night. Definitely another night. But for tonight, I don’t want any reminders of our past. Is that okay? Do you understand why?”
I do. I’ve danced and stripped for thousands of men. He needs to feel special, and so do I.
“Yes, I do.”
His voice is a soft plea. “Come to my bed.”
Nodding, I pull him by the hand and turn around. Instantly, his face is buried against my neck, and I’m so thankful the bed is merely inches away. Jax lifts my gown over my head, and I crawl onto his blanket, laying across his bed.
“What about the heels?” I say, wiggling my stiletto in the air. “Do those need to go, too?”
His hungry gaze travels up my leg.
“Those can stay,” he murmurs roughly.
Jax’s hand rubs my calf, up along my knee, and I squirm. I’m a livewire, desperately craving every caress as his fingers inch closer to my thigh. He lays beside me, his eyes taking in every curve. Every blemish.
“Please touch me,” I beg.
And then he does. It’s just a gentle brush of his finger against my entrance, but it’s enough to make me whimper. He does it again, and again, and on the third stroke, he slips slowly inside. Jax’s mouth covers mine, swallowing my moan.
“I’ve dreamed of this.” His voice is rough and raw. “Seeing your skin against my sheets. Your hair against my pillow. Feeling how wet you are. So wet, baby.”
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