“Kade,” I whispered, hardly believing I made it as Kade pulled me in close. One thick arm banded around my waist like iron, another wrapped around my throat. Somewhere in my head, alarm bells started to ring when the fingers around my neck tightened. Something was wrong. I knew the texture of the calluses under Kade’s hands by heart, the feel of his scarred knuckles tenderly brushing my cheek, the rough but possessive way he held me.
This man isn’t Kade, a voice screamed inside my head.
Warm, putrid breath tickled against my ear, followed by a familiar voice. “Didn’t I tell you before, hole? I’ll get you back. You’re my bitch to break.”
“Marco,” I croaked.
“You and I are going to have a lot of fun, hole.” Marco began choking me with one hand, cutting off my oxygen, but I knew he wouldn’t kill me immediately.
No. That would be mercy. Marco’s pride and reputation had taken the worst kind of hit. He had waited long enough to get me alone, and I had a feeling he was going to make the best use of his time.
Seconds crawled, and I suddenly forgot why I was here in the first place. Remembered terror and old fears rose up, nearly overwhelming me, paralyzing every muscle in my body.
“You’re nothing but trash, Chase, and I’m going to take my time with you. First, I’m going to fuck you over and over again. Leave your disgusting mouth and asshole leaking with blood and cum. Then I’m going to reduce you to an unrecognizable pulp of meat even Kade wouldn’t recognize. Tell me, do you think he’ll still want you then?”
Kade.
I could have run. Be a good boy and obeyed Kade’s last order. To return to the world I was no longer a part of and try my hand at living for his sake, but how could I even begin to move on knowing what I left behind?
If Marco didn’t have his fingers around my throat, I would’ve let out a hysterical laugh. After coming all this way, I was back at square one. Right where I started, but this time round, Kade wasn’t here to come and save me. All I had was myself, but Kade always believed I was strong, so his misplaced conviction had to be enough.
Blind with fear and rage, I reacted like a savage animal when Marco loosened his grip on me. I opened my mouth and bit the side of his neck. Hard. The taste of his sweat and overpowering cologne nearly made me gag, but I bit deeper, breaking skin. The taste of salty skin and copper flooded into my mouth. Savage pleasure filled me.
He shrieked. Began ripping me off him, practically tearing the roots of my hair, but I refused to let go. A fist collided into my gut, making me release him. I cried out in pain as he drove his fist right into my ribs. I stumbled on the floor. Tried to get my bearings again, but Marco repeatedly shoved his boot into my gut and ribs.
Dizzy with pain, I tried to focus, tried to get up, but a voice inside me warned me to stay down, wait, and find an opening when he least expected it. Fight the battles you can win, Kade always said. I spat out a sizeable chunk of his flesh, and despite my blurry vision, I glared at him, showing him the bright hatred in my eyes.
If he thought I was going to simply surrender and let him do what he pleased without a fight, he was wrong.
“You mad son of a bitch!” Marco shrieked.
He took a fistful of my hair and dragged me towards the bed. Agony coursed through every single muscle in my body, completely shutting down its natural response to fight back. Marco tossed me over the bed, clamped one of the leather cuffs attached to the bedroom to my left wrist before I could react, and began working on the right. I kicked at his hand weakly when he reached my ankle, but he easily tightened the buckles and did my remaining foot.
When Kade held me down or tied me, excitement thrummed through me like a live wire. What he promised was exquisite torment, pain deliciously tied with pleasure. Under Kade’s cruel but careful hands, I felt protected. All Marco managed to wrangle from me was fear. The sick bastard only got off by hurting me for real.
“Kade must be losing his touch if he needs to tie his dog down every night, or maybe you beg him to?” Marco sneered, finally assessing his handiwork.
My aching and bruised body felt taut, stretched too tight. When Kade tied me up, he made sure the restraints didn’t cut off blood circulation. Marco didn’t know what he was doing. His gaze speared through me, undressed me, and whispered promises of violence even though he hadn’t touched me yet. Just by looking at me, and showing me what he thought was my worth, he easily made me remember what I tried so hard to forget.
Kade taught me to love what I thought I had lost. He showed me through actions, by wanting me even though I was broken, tainted, and beyond saying, that I shouldn’t be ashamed of my own body.
“Maybe I shouldn’t kill you, bastard. I’ll take you with me. Let my men use you until you’re all bloody, loose, and useless.”
I bit in my tongue when Marco showed me his favorite knife. Did my best not to show any reaction as the sharp blade hissed, cut my shirt in half, sent the button of my jeans flying. My breath caught in my throat when I felt the tip of the knife against my thigh, but Marco only sliced his way across the denim and tossed the tattered remains of my jeans and boxers aside.
“You look much better like this, Chase, with your cock exposed.”
Marco left his knife on the bedside table. I hissed through my teeth as he pressed a hand across the blossoming bruises on my ribs before slithering his way downwards to grab my cock and finger my asshole. I struggled in my bonds, trying to get away from his prodding fingers, but my pathetic effort only made him laugh.
“So dry. A good hole should always be ready for his Master, but I know how Kade gets you hard.”
Grin still plastered on his lips, Marco jerked off his belt from the loops of his jeans. My stomach knotted. Dread filled me. He took the tip of the leather, pressed it to my lips. When I turned my head away in disgust, I tasted his fist. My head reeled with stars, made me feel nauseous. Marco struck the side of my jaw so hard, he practically dislodged my head from my neck.
When he shoved the leather again, I kissed it.
“If there’s one thing I can say for the bastard, he knew how to keep his toys in line. Time to squeal for me again, hole.”
He pulled his arm back and struck. The belt hit my abs, then my sore ribs. Delighted by my cry, Marco hit harder, his blows random and undisciplined. I hated Kade in that instant. Hated how he trained my body so well to respond to pain that my cock hardened each time the belt struck it.
“Look at you, all flushed and excited. The sick little puppy likes getting hit, eh?” Marco walked to the edge of the bed, eyeing my cock.
“Please. Don’t.” The words slipped out of me before I could stop myself.
Marco’s expression twisted, his features began to turn red. “Don’t? No one can tell me what do, least of all a fucking used-up hole.”
A groan tore through me when he began to layer my inner thighs and cock with welts, his blows uncontrolled, and each one harder than the last. Breathing hard, he tossed the belt, his eyes gleaming. Marco shoved two fingers into my asshole.
“See how disgusting you are? Even now, you’re practically begging me to fuck you. Well, you got your wish, bitch. I’ll mount you now when you’re hurting and take you again before you grow cold. ”
Marco peeled off his jeans and boxers and vaulted on top of my restrained body. I let out a little desperate sound when his weight pressed down against my bruises. My entire body felt like it was on fire. Marco might have left my cock aching after his beating, but I didn’t want his shaft penetrating me. Only Kade could claim me.
“Let’s take off the rest of this annoying fabric.” Marco picked up the knife again. His expression of triumph turned ugly. Every line on his face twisted to rage when the blade cut through the gauze and he saw the new ink. “What the fuck?”
“Like it, baby? Kade just had it done today,” I spat out, venom coating every word that came out of my mouth.
“Shut up, hole, or I’ll cut out the entire fucking ink off your chest,�
� Marco warned. “You don’t think I’ll do it?”
The terrified part of me remained stunned. Who the hell was this crazy bastard who continued to smirk when he remained completely under the mercy of a drug dealer who just threatened to flay him? The Chase I knew would shut up, but this new me refused to be silenced even when the tip of Marco’s blade drew blood right where the letter ‘K’ started.
“Take a good look, asshole, because I’m no longer your property. I might be one sick pup, but no matter how hard you try, you’re never going to be half the man Kade is.”
“You asked for it, hole,” Marco hissed, jerked up his blade.
Lying there, I calmly imagined his arm, descending and ascending repeatedly. The blade piercing through layers of skin, muscle, and bone, eventually reaching its target. A heart beating steady and strong, knowing that even if it stopped, it knew it belonged to someone else. Even if I ceased to breathe, Kade would keep the memory of me alive.
The shadow crept so silently in the room, Marco and I hardly heard him. A gun roared to life, once, twice, thrice. Marco’s mouth hung open in shock. Blood, warm and sticky, sputtered from his lips, spraying over my chest, ribs, and face. His knife landed with a soft thump on the fabric, barely slicing my side.
I remembered the bloody ruin Bernie’s face had become, except Marco’s was ten times worse. His flaccid prick still pressed against my ribs, and the obscene crimson flower of torn flesh and muscle continued to look at me, the sneer on his lips permanently intact.
Shocked, I couldn’t even scream, let alone move a single muscle. I didn’t dare.
The corpse attempting to mount me then kill me swayed forward, but a pair of strong hands grabbed Marco by the armpits and dragged him off me. Cold air caressed the space where his weight once pressed down on me.
The shooter began cutting away at the rope. Freed, I curled protectively to my side, drew my knees to my chest, and unleashed a desperate ragged chuckle of disbelief. I kept on laughing until it hurt to breathe, and my eyes began to tear up.
“Chase? Are you hurt? Answer me.”
I didn’t recognize the voice at first, or the blurry figure of the shooter leaning over me. He touched my shoulder, and I jerked back, my lips twisting to snarl.
“Don’t touch me. Only Kade can touch me.”
“Chase!” I could almost hear Kade roaring like a mad animal, his eyes bulging with rage. “Chase!”
Almost imagine him sprinting towards me, murderous expression on his face, his scarred hands, easily capable of violence, gripping a shotgun, running down anyone who got in his way like an unstoppable battering ram—both the swarming agents and fleeing Brotherhood members.
You came for him, risked your life for him, but he couldn’t do the same, the nasty voice inside me whispered. He didn’t save you when you needed him. This nameless shooter did.
A queasy feeling settled in my stomach. Once in a while, it was nice to dream, because in the end, dreams of a fleeting nightmare were all I have left.
“You’ll need to move on, Chase. Not today or tomorrow, but someday, and all I’ll be is a hazy memory.”
“I’m sorry, Master. It’s because I disobeyed you. I deserve this.” I whispered.
The shooter instantly withdrew his touch, shaking his head. “Jesus, you’re far more gone than I imagined.”
I flinched.
“Jameson, there’s nothing we can do for him. The boy’s in shock, and I can’t blame him,” said another male voice, assessing me. “It looks like he’s been through hell like the others. I mean, fuck. He looks as old as my eldest.”
“We’re lucky we got here in time,” Jameson, the shooter, I was sure of it now, said.
Blinking away my tears, I fell silent. I pulled myself together and peered up at my saviors, or captors. I didn’t know yet. At least they didn’t seem to mean me harm. Clad entirely in black from head to toe and toting guns. Kade’s ex-military crew, or were they Grayson’s men? I almost panicked. Jameson grabbed my shoulder and forced me to look at him.
“Henderson?” I asked in relief, frowning hard at the black bulletproof vest he wore. “Where’s Kade? Shouldn’t you be with him?”
“Jameson, I’ll leave him in your hands.” The second man left, and I winced at the sound of gunfire outside.
“Why did he keep calling you Jameson?’ I whispered.
Every muscle in my body screamed in protest when I sat up, my fingers digging into his wrist. Kade’s second looked at me for a few seconds, jaw hard, entire body taut with tension. Henderson had always been hard to read, until now. Emotions flittered through his face like any man, or perhaps I got better at reading people. Conflict. Resolution.
“Henderson’s not my real name.”
He gently took off my fingers. He walked to the dresser and pulled out a green shirt and faded jeans Kade liked on me, and then tossed them to me. He would know where everything was. Henderson had been there during my first few days of captivity, and he’d always been by Kade’s side. I stared at the fabric blankly for a few seconds.
“Please put on the clothes, Chase. Don’t worry. After this, we’ll get you the appropriate medical attention after we have this talk.”
Used to commands, I mutely dressed. The fabric of the shirt and denim scratched against the fresh marks. I winced, but said nothing.
Henderson stepped over Marco’s corpse, put away his gun, and sat on the edge of the bed near me. “Let me reintroduce myself. My name is Agent Paul Jameson, and I’ve been doing deep undercover work for a joint operation between the FBI and DEA for over five years.”
“You’re the mole.” He nodded. I bit on my lower lip. “But you’ve only took action recently. Why?”
“Because it was finally time. I told my superiors if we didn’t act now, when Keith and Kade were feuding, we’ll never get the opportunity again, not if Keith continues amassing private security of Grayson’s level.”
Looking for something to sink my fingers in, I dug my nails into the denim. Remembered the day Kade decided it was safe to take me out, certain I wouldn’t run let alone think of escaping. I didn’t. I stayed and shyly let him shop an entire wardrobe for me. After, he took me right there in the backseat while in the mall’s parking lot. Told me I was his good boy. I remembered blushing, not caring he fucked me right there in the open.
It felt so long ago, like an entire lifetime, a beautiful and raw moment that would eventually fade away the more I kept chasing after it. What I wanted was to see Kade one last time, either his corpse or his handcuffed figure, but I had a feeling Henderson would instantly refuse.
“I know it all seems confusing right now. You must be pissed at me for the indifference I showed you the first few weeks, but no matter how it was, I had a job to do. You’re not the first sub I saw Kade break and train, but you’ll be the last.” Paul Jameson smiled warily, and then reached out to muss my hair, like I was a dog or small child that would feel better after.
I shoved his hand away angrily. Drew my knees tight against me and began to rock back and forth. Instead of anger, Jameson gave me a look of pity. Fuck his pity. I didn’t want it.
“So it’s all because of you,” I whispered vehemently, staring at the red marks on my wrists left behind by Marco’s immature rope work.
I might be on the verge of falling apart and finally cracking, but a part of me remained sane enough to know I didn’t believe the accusation. Knew what momentary happiness Kade and I found only existed in a picture perfect world.
“Kade trusted you like a brother, and you stabbed him in the back.”
“Listen to me, Chase.” Jameson’s voice hardened, but he didn’t try touching me again, as if he was afraid I’d somehow blow up. “Kade isn’t a good man. You of all people know that. Men like Keith and Kade belong behind bars. With your help and the testimony of the other young men and women, we can keep the streets safe.”
“You’re the one who understands nothing. I love him,” I snapped, tears angrily filling
my eyes. “And you took him away from me, just when I realized that.”
“You don’t love him, Chase. You just have to look at your own body to see the hard evidence. Would someone who really loves you put their mark of ownership on you without your consent?” Jameson asked, nodding to the swirl of ink slightly peeking from my shirt.
“But everything Kade did was with my consent.”
Jameson gave me that look of sympathy again. I wanted to pick up Marco’s knife and stab him.
“That’s Stockholm Syndrome talking. Right now, you’re confused, but we have qualified professionals who will help you understand. Get your life back on track, and maybe someday you’ll forget about all this.”
“I don’t give a flying fuck if I have Stockholm. It’s my life, and I’m an adult. I can choose the way I live.” I sniffed and wiped away the tears with the back of my hand. “Don’t for a second think you can force me to testify against Kade in court. There are other victims, take your fucking pick, but just leave me alone.”
This time, a flash of anger appeared in Jameson’s eyes. He gripped my hand, nails digging into flesh, and I let out a sound of pain.
“Don’t be selfish, Chase. Most of those young men and women might still be breathing, but their minds are gone because of the abuse or the drugs. You’re the lucky one.”
Crazy Chase took over again, and whatever Jameson saw, it made him hesitate. “Lucky. Sure. I’d rather be dead inside than hurt this much.” I nodded to his bruising grip on my wrist and grinned. “Careful there, Jameson. Should I tell your fellow agents how you got so hard, nearly breaking a boy’s arm? How the only way you can get your cock up is by having a boy who couldn’t fight back?”
“You son of a bitch, you understand nothing.” Jameson growled, digging his fingers into the bruised flesh.
To retaliate, I’d blindly stabbed at the dark to ease the hurt and confusion boiling inside me, but it looked like I had hit a tender spot. If constantly living with the violence of the Brotherhood affected Jameson mentally, then he had no right making demands of me.
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