I was almost finished with my homework when my mom knocked on my door and asked if she could come in.
“Whatever. It’s your house, I can’t stop you.”
She stepped in and shut the door behind her. After walking over, she sat beside me on the bed. “So what’s wrong? You’re rarely grouchy and whiny all in one night.” She put her hand on my leg and slapped it lightly.
I considered confiding in her about what was really bothering me, and I opened my mouth to start, but the words wouldn’t come. So I didn’t say anything, just stared out the window, ignoring her, watching the wind blow the pine tree outside my window. A branch scraped the glass with a screech.
She stretched out beside me, the familiar smell of ginger floating in the air. It had been my mother’s favorite perfume since I was a kid. Now, when I smelled it, I always knew she was close by. “I’ve got all night; you’ll feel better after you talk to someone. If you would rather, I could send up your dad.” She gazed up at the ceiling and spoke absently.
I cringed; not in the least bit interested in discussing boys with my father.
She snorted. “I didn’t think so.”
I lay down beside her, stubbornly remaining silent. After about ten minutes of strained quiet, I started to doubt my decision.
My mother could also be stubborn, and she was telling the truth when she said she’d wait all night. So unless I wanted a bed mate, I needed to tell her something just to get rid of her. I opened my mouth to lie, but instead, the whole truth came pouring out. I told her about the first dream, and then about the first few awkward conversations with Lucas, and all of them since.
I took a deep breath and began again, lowering my voice to a whisper. “And when I talk to him, I feel like I’ve known him all my life.” I raised my voice again. “Oh, and of course there are the dreams; after I saw him without his glasses, I realized it was him and not Logan. I’m having romantic dreams about us, and I don’t know why, and once I saw him dead. Oh, you know that part, you just didn’t know it was him.” I stopped and took another deep breath before whispering, “Today, when we sat together at lunch, he talked to me so softly and touched my hand. He left me speechless.”
“Wow,” my mom said, looking as dazed as I felt. “I think you were holding things in for too long. I also think you have real feelings for him, and you’re scared.” We lay quietly, deep in thought.
“I do like him; I wouldn’t even admit it to myself. He is so different than I imagined. I still don’t know him all that well, but I feel like I do.”
My mom was quiet for a moment. “I knew there was something between the two of you, I could feel it. Even if you didn’t know it yourselves. But I think Lucas knew even then, when we had lunch at his parents’ restaurant. You should have seen the way he looked at you.” I raised my eyebrows in disbelief. “I’m serious. I know this is new to you, but I’m pretty sure it’s not for him.”
I was completely shocked. I sat up and stared down at her. “Mother, he had never even spoken to me up until a few weeks ago, and he never would have if I hadn’t bumped into him.”
She pressed her lips together and shook her head. “I am good at reading people. Don’t stress about it. Just enjoy it, first love is amazing, and I’m excited for you. And I will need updates when it progresses, and I say when because I know it will.” She stood up. “You should let your dad meet him. He’s usually a pushover, but I think that’s because you’ve never been serious about anybody before. I know it’s too soon to talk like this, but keep it in mind, okay?” She leaned toward me and kissed the top of my head. “I hope getting it out helped. I’ll see you in the morning.” She smiled at me as she closed the door behind her.
After finishing my homework, I went to bed and…dreamed of Lucas. We were lying on a hill talking, when I turned my head and he leaned in to kiss me. The dream was so real I could feel his breath on my skin, the tingle on my lips after he pulled away.
I woke up in a very good mood. I had to work after school, so I stuffed my work clothes in my backpack and hopped in the shower.
I chose my outfit carefully, a silver, tight-fitting short-sleeve silk blouse and my dark blue skinny jeans. I straightened my hair, which I didn’t normally do, usually just brushed it and hoped it didn’t look too frizzy. I wore makeup as well instead of my usual lip gloss and eyeliner. When I was satisfied with my reflection in the mirror, I headed downstairs to grab a quick breakfast.
The kitchen smelled of coffee and burnt toast.
“Wow, you look nice, Sarah,” my mom said when I walked into the room. “Is there a special occasion?”
“No, I just woke up earlier, so I had more time to get ready.” I popped a grape from the fruit bowl into my mouth.
She didn’t believe my explanation. “Sure,” she said with a smirk.
“Who are you trying to impress?” Alex appeared in the doorway.
“You, little brother. Do you need a ride to school, or are you going with Mom?”
He looked surprised. “I’d rather not go with Mom, she gets there too early. But you hate driving me.”
I looked at him innocently. “I don’t mind.” Opening the cupboard door, I took out my favorite cereal and poured some in a bowl.
“Thanks,” he said, looking a little skeptical.
My mom smiled at me and whispered, “You look happy, I hope our talk helped.” I only nodded since my mouth was full of sugar crunchies.
“Well, I’m going to work then. Thanks for taking your brother, Sarah,” she called as she walked out the door.
“What’s with you?” Alex asked me after Mom had left.
“Nothing.” I shrugged my shoulders and took another bite of cereal. “I’m just in a good mood.”
“You’ll have to get a ride home with Mom, I have to work,” I told him once we were settled in my car.
He was slouched down into the seat listening to his MP3 player. “Whatever,” he mumbled.
We arrived at school, and this time I scored a space closer to the entrance. Alex took off before I had the engine shut off. I guess he didn’t want to be seen with his older sister.
I stepped out of my car, and headed inside, telling myself, I wasn’t scanning the lot for Lucas, but when I saw his black sports car, I felt relieved.
Derrick was waiting for me at my locker. “Well, hello there, hottie. Who are you dressed up for?”
I glared at him as I turned my combination. This was getting annoying. “Nobody, I just woke up earlier, so I had more time to get ready,” I said for the third time as I opened my locker door and shoved my bag into it. Did I usually look that bad?
He wasn’t convinced. “Well, here comes Lucas and his eyes are about to pop out of his head.”
I turned to see Lucas walking toward us. “Hey, Derrick, Sarah. Is Emma still sick?”
I was quite happy to see that he couldn’t take his eyes off me. Derrick answered for me. “Yeah, but she’ll probably feel better tomorrow. Sarah said you had the flu on Monday. It sucked, didn’t it?”
“That’s for sure,” Lucas said, barely moving his eyes away from my face. “It must be going around. I hope you don’t get it too, Sarah.”
“I don’t get sick often, I think I’m safe.” I shut my locker door and leaned against it.
Derrick spoke, his head bobbing from Lucas to me. “Well, I guess I’ll go to class. I’ll see you there,” he said, nodding at me with a wide grin.
After he walked away, Lucas turned to me. “If it’s just you and Derrick today, maybe Andy, Kyle, and I will sit with you at lunch again?”
My face heated slightly. “Sure.”
He smiled at me as the bell rang. “I guess I’ll see you later.” He leaned in, his face just inches from mine. “You look amazing.” he whispered, then walked away.
I felt a little queasy as I ran to English class.
I slid into my seat while Derrick grinned at me. “Now I know why you’re all dressed up.”
“Shut up,” I
said dryly, without turning around. I heard him chuckle behind me.
In music class, I was daydreaming about Lucas when Miss Fitzgerald called us to order.
“Okay, class, I know you have been working really hard on my original piece for the upcoming recital, but I have thought of a way to make the night even more exciting. I want each of you to compose a short original piece of your own.”
There were a lot of moans among my classmates. Being the music nerd that I was, I thought it was a great idea and couldn’t wait to get started.
“Don’t worry, if you need help just let me know. I want the pieces to be about your emotions. When I hear each one, I want to know what you were feeling when you wrote it.” She was leaning on her desk with her back to it. She pushed off and began to pace back and forth in front of the class. “We can show emotion through music. I want you to show me yours. It could be a happy song, angry, or sad, even about fear, anything. But have fun with it. Go to your instruments and start. If you need any help, let me know.”
I sat down on the piano bench and tried to think of my emotions. I closed my eyes and saw Lucas’ face, and all I could think was happy. A tune came to my mind and I started tapping my fingers on the cold keys, trying a fast melody with a turn at the end. It actually sounded pretty good.
Chapter Eight
Hero
Lucas didn’t show up at lunch; he didn’t even come into the cafeteria. Even though Derrick’s friends Pete and Cory sat with us, the table felt empty.
Lucas did make it to history, but he arrived late and I couldn’t ask why he didn’t show for lunch, and when class was dismissed, he rushed out.
I didn’t see him for the rest of the day. I looked for his black sports car after school; it was nowhere to be seen. I climbed in my car and sat quietly, willing myself to turn the key in the ignition, but I couldn’t. There was a tightness in my chest and my eyes burned with the threat of tears. Maybe he wasn’t interested after all. Had I been imagining his attention? He really seemed like he wanted to spend time with me. What kind of game was he playing?
Eventually, I started the car and drove off, angry at him as much as myself.
At work, I felt sick. I was on ticket sales with Zack. At first I felt a little leery of him, after my talk with Marcy. But soon it became easy to have a conversation; he was actually fun to work with.
I had an hour left of my shift when my stomach started to churn. “Oh God,” I groaned, clutching my stomach.
“Are you okay?” Zack asked.
“No, I think I’m gonna throw up.” I stumbled out of the booth and ran for the bathroom, making it just in time. The day had started out promising, took a turn when Lucas stood me up, and now it was going to end with my head in a toilet, heaving my guts out. I just wanted to go home to bed before something else went wrong.
I left the bathroom and told the manager I had to leave. He said it was fine; it was a slow night anyway.
I spent the rest of the night between my bed and the bathroom.
The next morning, I lay under my blankets, feeling like death warmed over, when I heard a knock at the door. “Come in,” I whispered.
“Still feel sick? Should I stay home?” my mom asked as she stepped up to the bed.
“No, I’ll be fine, it’s not like there’s anything you can do. If it’s what all of my friends had, I’ll be fine by tomorrow.”
“I brought you some ginger soda, and I’ll call you when I can to see how you’re doing.” She set my drink on the nightstand.
After she left, I fell back to sleep. I must have been delusional because I dreamed of Lucas again—well, not a dream, just a series of flashes. I saw Lucas at different stages and another face, someone I’d never met before. He was around my age with thick sandy-colored hair and intense blue eyes that seemed to bore into me. His high cheekbones and cleft chin gave his face character. He would have been good-looking if his image wasn’t distorted in rage. The rage seemed to be focused on Lucas. It was all flashes of darkness, blood, wilted roses, and knives. Nightmares must be part of my sickness.
I woke up sometime during the day to the phone ringing. I grabbed it from beside my bed. “Hello,” I whispered roughly.
“Did I wake you? I’m sorry, I called to see how you were feeling,” Emma said on the other end of the line.
“I haven’t barfed in a few hours, so that’s a start.”
“You’ll feel better by tonight. Can I ask you a question, or do you want to go back to sleep?”
“Shoot.”
“What’s up with you and Lucas? Derrick said you were all hot and heavy yesterday, and I know you had lunch the other day. And just a few minutes ago he asked how you were, and he wanted me to tell you that he hoped you felt better soon, so spill.”
“Ugh…I am really not in the mood for gossip Emma, but nothing. Yes, there were some sparks yesterday morning, but it cooled when he blew me off the rest of the day. We made plans for lunch, and then he never showed.”
“Why?”
“I have no idea, but I’m not going to stress about it. If something happens it happens. But if it doesn’t, oh well.”
“He doesn’t deserve you,” she said to cheer me up.
I groaned. “I know. Now I’m hanging up, or I’m going to throw up.”
I tossed the phone onto my nightstand and climbed out of bed, walking slowly downstairs, my limbs aching with every movement. I poured myself some more soda then headed back to my room. I sunk into bed, pulling the blankets up to my shoulders. I was surprised that just getting myself a drink had weakened me. I fell asleep, and stayed that way the rest of the day.
My mom came in with juice after she came home from work. “How are you feeling, honey?”
“I think the worst is over. I haven’t gotten sick since this afternoon.” I sat up to drink the juice. “I think I’ll come down and watch TV. I’m a little bored.”
She smiled at me, brushing a lock of hair from my forehead. “Sure, come on down and I’ll make you some toast and tea.”
The warm liquid and buttery sustenance settled my stomach, and it was nice to sit with my family. I had been cooped up in my room for a day and a half and I needed a change of scenery.
When evening came, I felt better, even more so after I had a shower and brushed my teeth, washing away the remnants of the flu. Feeling refreshed, I lay down for a restful, dreamless sleep.
I woke early, feeling normal again. I chose my short dark blue dress, and added black tights since it was getting colder out. I loved this dress. It was one of the outfits I bought on my shopping trip with my mom. Emma had returned it the day after she borrowed it.
I curled my hair for a different look and applied my makeup. And for the finishing touch, I sprayed some of my new perfume. When I posed in front of the mirror, I had to admit I looked good. If Lucas wanted to stare at me like he did the other day, he could. If he wanted to ignore me again, no way, this time I would be the one to blow him off.
I parked in the lot at school and climbed out of my car. I was leaning in the backseat getting my bag when I heard a deep voice behind me. “Feeling better?”
I spun around to see Lucas leaning against the white pickup that was parked beside me. “Yep,” I said coldly, slamming my door and pushing past him, walking as fast as I could.
“You’re mad about the other day aren’t you?” He was behind me, keeping up with my pace.
“No, why would I be mad?” I kept my gaze straight ahead, afraid that if I saw his handsome face, I’d let go of my anger, and I couldn’t do that, yet. He hadn’t suffered enough.
“You seem angry.” He was walking beside me now, his arm brushing my elbow.
I glanced at him, hoping I seemed indifferent. “Nope.”
He wasn’t convinced. “Well, about the other day, not showing up for lunch. I lost track of time playing basketball with the guys. I’m sorry.”
There was something not right about his explanation. He didn’t even mention not spe
aking to me the rest of the day. “Oh, right, we were supposed to meet for lunch, weren’t we?” I stopped walking and stared at him, and with a slight smile I added, “No biggie, it must have slipped my mind.” We were in the school now. “If that’s all you wanted, I’ll see you later.” I walked away without giving him a chance to make up another excuse.
I glanced behind me to see if he had followed. He was still standing in the front of the large front bay windows where I left him, staring in my direction with a stunned expression on his face.
It was so hard to walk away, especially since he looked so good today. Without his glasses, you could see the tiny flecks of gold in his hazel eyes. His hair appeared to be a little shorter, coming just below his ears. He was wearing a brown sweater and jeans, and his black motorcycle boots gave him a bad-boy edge you wouldn’t expect from Lucas Tate. It was necessary to keep my distance from him to protect myself. I didn’t want to feel like I did yesterday when I sat alone in the parking lot looking for his car, feeling rejected and confused.
At lunch, Emma was rambling on about her date with Derrick that evening. I sat beside her, half listening, half eating my sandwich. She leaned over to me. “Lucas is staring at you,” she whispered in my ear.
I glanced at her, avoiding the direction she was looking. “So?” I said, taking another bite of my sandwich.
“Did something happen this morning? He looks sad.”
“He apologized for not meeting me for lunch because he was playing basketball with the guys.” I took a sip out of my water bottle.
Her eyes narrowed. “That was his excuse? What a douche.”
“Yep, so I acted like I had forgotten that we were supposed to meet.”
“Good for you.”
I didn’t feel like sitting in the crowded lunchroom anymore, listening to the loud voices and laughter. “I’m going to my locker, I’ll see you later.” I put the rest of my lunch in my bag and stood up, waving to my friends as I walked away. I glanced at Lucas’ table, but he wasn’t there anymore. Kyle and Andy were tossing a rolled-up paper bag back and forth across their table.
Fated Dreams (Book One In The Affinity series) Page 7