Running in Place (Mending Hearts)

by L. B. Simmons

  Giving her a grin, I slump down into my seat and close the door. “Where’re we headed to?”

  She adjusts the mirrors and then puts the Jeep in reverse. Hooking her arm around the back of my seat, still smiling, she says, “First thing, we’re getting your ass a toothbrush and toothpaste. You can brush on the way.” She starts to back out of the driveway. “I just cleared our destination with the parties involved, and we will be arriving shortly.”

  Laughing, I face forward and just let her drive. Leaning toward the radio, I turn it on and the sound of Carly Rae Jepsen’s Call Me Maybe blares through my speakers. I reach to change the station, but my hand is assaulted as she smacks it away and turns it up even louder. Her shoulders begin to bounce as she belts out the song, the wind blowing her hair everywhere and the smile on her face so pure, so carefree, I find her absolutely mesmerizing. My heart clenches at the thought of leaving, no longer able to experience any of this with her.

  As we drive, and as she sings every single song that plays, I think about my morning with her.

  It’s undeniable.

  I want her.

  Unfortunately, I can’t have her.

  So I try to help her. I want her to heal. I want her to be happy. I want her to move forward instead of remaining in this guilt-filled quicksand of a life that she’s been barely escaping since I met her. And as I watch her singing and laughing next to me, I hope that she’s learning there’s more to her life than her past. That she alone determines her future because I need to know that she’ll be okay when I do leave.

  Glancing over at her, I can’t help but smile as she sings Taylor Swift’s 22. With her hand clutched to her chest, she sings straight from her heart with such conviction, her desire to just be stirring something deep within my soul. I completely understand her longing to be free in this life. To just be who we are — no fear, no expectations, no anger — just a couple of crazy kids knowing nothing of our tortured pasts. I understand her because I am her.

  A smile breaks across my face as I drum my thumb on my thigh to the beat of the music. Finally looking forward, I do the one thing I never thought myself capable of doing.

  I sing along with her.

  At the top of my fucking lungs.

  Laughing, she looks over at me, nodding her approval while she continues her heartfelt serenade. As we come to the chorus, she holds her fist in front of my mouth, and while I want to tell her to keep both hands on the wheel, I don’t.

  I grab her wrist and yell every single word until she’s laughing so hard, tears form behind her sunglasses. My heart swells with pure, unadulterated joy at the sight.

  As the song ends, we pull into the gas station to get my much needed toothbrush and toothpaste. Parking by an available gas pump, I open my door just as Tatum jumps out of the Jeep. “I got it!” she yells as she crosses the front of the vehicle. “I’m going to grab something to eat. Want anything?”

  Knowing that nothing really tastes good after brushing my teeth, I reply, “Nah. Go ahead. I’ll get some gas while you’re inside.” Stepping out onto the pavement as she turns towards the entrance, I tear my gaze away from her ass and make my way to the pump. After filling the tank, I set the nozzle back and turn just as she’s exiting the gas station.

  Beaming smile on her face, she approaches, plastic bag in hand. “Okay, I got you some water too, so you can rinse.” Grabbing the toothbrush, she hands it to me, followed by a box of toothpaste and a bottle of water. I walk over to the trashcan, thankful that it’s early and that only a liner is inside, and brush my teeth, rinsing and gargling with the water before turning back to where she’s standing.

  “Ready?” she asks. Jumping in the driver’s seat once again, she starts the engine as I take my seat.

  Soon after, we pull up to a red-brick house in suburbia. Complete with a white picket fence and perfect landscaping. As we come to a stop, I begin to ask her where in the hell we are when I hear shrieking and screaming coming from the front porch. Startled, I look over in the direction of all the chaos where three familiar little girls are waving while running our way.

  “We’re at Blake’s house?” I ask.

  “Yep. I haven’t been over here in a while. I miss the girls and I want them to officially meet you. Even though I know you’ve seen them, I don’t think you’ve been formally introduced.” She opens her door and as soon as her feet touch the ground, all three girls have their arms wrapped around her waist, laughing and giggling with excitement.

  Shutting my door behind me, I walk around the front of the Jeep to where they all stand, their eyes all locked on me. It’s pretty intimidating. Rubbing the top of my head, I wait for Tatum to make the introductions because honestly, kids scare the shit out of me.

  Crouching down between them, she looks at the girls and then up at me. “Girls, this is Noah. My friend. Go shake his hand and introduce yourself.”

  High-pitched giggles come from the smaller ones, but the oldest just watches me with a wary look in her eyes. Like she’s evaluating me. It’s unnerving.

  After a couple of seconds, she finally steps forward and sticks her hand out in front of me. Her curly hair in a low ponytail, she’s wearing a checkered fedora, a shirt with some group of boys I’ve never seen before, and jean shorts. “Hi, I’m Nycole. And you’re Noah.” Her dimple sinks into her cheek as she smiles at me.

  I grin back at her as I shake her hand. “Yes, I am. It’s nice to meet you, Nycole.”

  She gives me a slight nod before she steps back, replaced by her younger sister, whose eyes are almost as beautiful as Tatum’s. A pale shade of light green with a smidge of blue, I don’t think I’ve ever seen anything like them. Wearing a pink sequined skirt over black tights and a tank top with a ballerina on the front, she fans the skirt out while she curtsies. “I’m Kyndall. Hi, Noah.” She rises, sticking out her hand. Shaking it, I reply, “Hi, Kyndall. That’s a pretty skirt.” Mentally, I palm my face as Tatum laughs, still crouched down holding the smallest of the girls. I might kill her for bringing me here.

  I watch as the little one whispers in Tatum’s ear. Tatum shrugs her shoulders and then whispers something back to her. The little one looks up at me with two of the biggest dimples I’ve ever seen caving in her cheeks and her brown eyes full of mischief. Hopping off of Tatum’s lap, her long, brown curls bounce as she skips to where I stand, holding her hand out the entire time she makes her way over to me. Once she arrives, she says, “Hi! I’m Rylie.” She looks back at Tatum, whose smile couldn’t get any larger, and then back to me. “Are you Tatum’s boyfriend?”

  “Rylie!” Nycole yells, immediately covering her eyes with the palm of her hand as she mutters to herself. “So embarrassing.”

  Kyndall just giggles.

  And Rylie — well, Rylie’s waiting for an answer. My answer. With her hand still in front of her.

  After glancing back at Tatum, who just shrugs her shoulders and laughs, I look back at Rylie and take her hand into mine.

  Squatting down, I meet her at eye level, and signal for her to come closer. When she does, I lean into her and whisper, “Yes, she is. I think I love her actually, but don’t tell her that, okay? Our secret?” As I lean back, I’m met with her wide eyes and huge dimples. She lets go of my hand, only to stick her pinky finger in front of my face.

  “Pinky-promise.” she whispers back. After hooking my pinky with hers, I rise up as she claps her hands together, squealing so loudly that my ears might be bleeding, then she takes off into the house.

  The other two girls giggle as they run after their sister, leaving me alone with Tatum.

  She narrows her eyes at me while she stands. Shrugging my shoulders, I raise my eyebrows and smile back at her. “It’s a secret. She pinky-promised.”

  Looping her thumbs into her pockets, she walks over to me and knocks my shoulder with hers as she laughs. Continuing past me, she steps towards the house, replying over her shoulder.

  “Yeah, well, candy always trumps a pinky-pro
mise. I sure am glad I picked some up at the gas station.”

  Damn it.

  Nothing, and I mean nothing, breaks a pinky-promise with these girls. Fortunately, Noah doesn’t know that. That little bit of information I will be keeping to myself. Payback for his little “secret” with Rylie.

  Entering the house, I hold the door open as he follows me inside, not smiling as wide anymore with my little threat. I laugh to myself.

  Closing the door behind him, my eyes scan the living room. I noticed Harlow’s car outside, and I pray that Trace isn’t here. We’ve had enough family drama this morning without adding our issues to the mix. I know that I’ll eventually have to talk to him, just not today.

  Immediately we’re met by Cooper, who is wearing Rylie’s Hello Kitty nightgown this morning. The poor dog. The girls giggle as they run around the living room, chasing him as his tail wags from underneath the pink ruffle at the bottom.

  Laughing, I turn to Noah, who clearly has never witnessed a dog wearing a night gown before. “Like I said, never a dull moment.” We watch together as the girls follow Cooper into the kitchen and open the back door to let him outside, squealing and shrieking the whole time.

  “Girls! Calm down!” Alex yells. Looping my arm through Noah’s, I jerk my chin toward where everyone must be congregating this morning, as the smell of eggs, bacon, and coffee lingers in the air. Stomach rumbling, I take a step toward the delicious aroma, only to find myself whipped back around, face-to-face with Noah.

  Placing both hands on my cheeks, he lowers his mouth and gently brushes his lips against mine. My fingers land on his chest as my body sinks into his, suddenly forgetting about breakfast, my hunger now for something entirely different.

  “See, Mommy?” I hear Rylie and open my eyes. Breaking our kiss, I slowly turn, praying that what I think is happening isn’t really happening.

  Sadly, it is.

  Standing right in front of us is the entire Morgan clan…and Harlow. No Trace in sight, thank God.

  Rylie — pointing in our direction, giggling as her eyes light up with pure joy, most likely that someone else has been caught doing something they shouldn’t be.

  Alex — her brown eyes full of shock as she cups her mouth with her hand as she holds J.D with the other, hiding a huge grin based on the dimple caving in the left side of her face.

  Blake — also smiling, although not as extensively as his wife as he reaches down to shield Rylie’s eyes.

  Nycole and Kyndall — making gagging sounds while looking at each other and laughing.

  And Harlow — mouth open wide, clearly dumbstruck, her green eyes darting between Noah and I, before narrowing them at the both of us. Not out of anger, more like she’s assessing the situation.

  “See?” Rylie says, peeling Blake’s hand away from her face. “That’s Noah! He told me a secret, and now we’re friends!”

  Bouncing her way over to him, Rylie grabs Noah’s hand and pulls him up the stairs. “Come on! Let’s go play with my new tea set!” He throws me an anxiety-ridden glance over his shoulder and I just wave back at him, laughing.

  Once he’s gone, everyone goes about their business as they head back into the kitchen. Except Harlow. She lags behind and when I pass her, she places her hand on my shoulder, prompting me to turn around.

  “I guess some rules were broken then?” she inquires with a smile.

  “Yes. It turns out Noah is a closet rule-breaker,” I grin back at her.

  “I’m glad,” she says. “You two look happy together.”

  Her face turns solemn as she inhales deeply. “Is he still planning on heading to school this month?”

  My breath hitches in my throat, not ready to face the reality. “Yes,” I say softly.

  She steps towards me and pulls me into an embrace. “Well, sweetie, you never know. Life can surprise you sometimes. But, just in case,” she releases me, peering into my eyes, “I’m going to give you my number. You call me anytime you need too. For anything. Or nothing at all.”

  I nod back at her as she takes my hand, leading me into the kitchen. As soon as we enter, Alex turns and begins to say something, but Harlow shakes her head slowly, cutting her off. Alex’s face falls into a pout, her bottom lip poking out at she turns to pay attention to the bacon sizzling in the pan on the stove, clearly not happy.

  Harlow rips a piece of paper from a notepad by the kitchen phone and then heads back to me. After giving me another small hug, she stuffs the paper in my front pocket. “Anytime. Day or night. I mean it.” She pats my cheek with her hand before walking to where Alex is cooking, still sulking.

  Turning toward the table, I head over to where Blake now sits with J.D., bouncing him on his lap while Nycole and Kyndall play an intense game of “Go Fish”. Taking the baby from him, I take a seat next to Blake, holding J.D. by the waist to help him balance on his chubby legs, his beautiful green eyes are watching my earrings as he reaches for them. I take his hands and his fingers curl around my thumb as he continues his balancing act, cooing and smiling back at me.

  Breaking my stare away from him, I’m met by a much older and wiser pair of identical eyes. Blake clears his throat as he leans forward, setting his elbows on the table as his fingers form a steeple in front of his lips. “Well, that was unexpected,” he chuckles. “When did you and Noah start seeing each other?”

  “Last month.” Out of the corner of my eye, I notice Alex moving everything she needs to plate up for breakfast to the island so she can hear our discussion. She’s determined, even if she’s not allowed to say anything.

  Blake watches her over my shoulder and just shakes his head. Moving closer to me, he lowers his voice. “Well, I can’t say I’m surprised. According to Alex, it was going to happen sooner or later. He’s a good boy, Tatum. You deserve that.” He laughs under his breath as Alex growls, giving up her mission and walking back over to the stove.

  Even with her out of ear shot, he moves closer, his caring, gentle eyes holding mine. “Now this is purely my gut instinct and not Alex’s.” His eyes dart to his wife before continuing. “Things are going to happen with Noah that you will question. Try to keep in mind that everything happens for a reason. It’s all about timing. And when the time is right for you, in your own life, you’ll understand the reason things happen the way they do.” He grazes my chin with the tip of his knuckle. “Just remember that, kiddo,” he says, reclining back into his chair.

  I give him a half-smile and nod. Maybe coming over here wasn’t such a good idea. I’m kind of depressed now.

  I know he’s talking about Noah leaving.

  I know Harlow was talking about Noah leaving.

  I know that Alex wants to, but is not allowed to talk about Noah...at all.

  But me — I don’t want to talk about Noah leaving. I want to spend the rest of the summer with him, not talking about it.

  So, that’s what I plan on doing.

  “Hey, Blake,” I hand J.D. back to him over the table. “We came over to wash Noah’s Jeep. Do you mind?”

  “Wash the car?” Kyndall jumps up. “I’m going to get my swimsuit on! Woo-hoo!” she screams and runs out of the kitchen. “Rylie! We’re gonna wash the car!” I hear her yell to her sister, running up the stairs.

  “Not until you eat breakfast, young lady!” Alex yells after her. Looking down at the plate in front of her she says to herself, “I don’t even know why I bother.”

  Rising from the table, Blake walks up behind his wife, nuzzling her neck as he places one arm on the counter by her side with the baby in the other. She lets out a giggle as he whispers something undoubtedly romantic and sweet in her ear.

  Just watching them together makes me grin to myself. Turning my head to look over at Nycole, my smile turns into laughter as she watches her parents, the facial expression displayed on her face clearly indicating that she does not appreciate their P.D.A as much as I do.

  Bumping her arm with my elbow, I gesture towards the stairs. “Go get your swimsuit
on and let’s go wash a Jeep.”

  She shakes her head, then glances at me as she rises, the seat scooting across the floor behind her. “Yes. Let’s,” she says, sounding just like her mother.

  As she heads upstairs, she passes Harlow who’s grabbing her purse off the counter, keys in hand. “I’m out. Thanks for breakfast,” she says, heading into the living room. Glancing back at me over her shoulder as she opens the front door, she gives me a wink, then exits the house.

  Standing up, I decide to leave Alex and Blake alone and head upstairs to save Noah. As soon as I reach the top of the stairs, I hear Rylie’s contagious giggle coming from her room. Just barely cracking her door open, I poke my head in just as Noah’s head turns in my direction. At least I think it’s Noah.

  Sitting at Rylie’s tea table, he’s donning a red boa and a huge floppy hat on his head, holding a tea cup with one hand, and the accompanying plate with the other. Rylie, of course, is wearing one of her many dress-up outfits, this time playing the part of Alice from Alice in Wonderland. Pouring his tea, she looks up at me. “Wanna play, Tatum? Noah and I are having tea.”

  Noah gives her a smile that stops my heart. “Yeah, Tate.” He looks back at me. “You should join us. Rylie’s tea is delicious.”

  She giggles as she sets the pot on the table and pats him on the back. “Why, thank you, sir.”

  Laughing, I reply, “Well, although you do look beautiful, both of you, I thought we would wash Betsy while we were here.”

  He gives me a thankful nod before pushing himself up from the table. “Rylie, would you like to wash my Jeep with us?” he asks.

  Her eyebrows press together on her forehead. “You named your jeep Betsy? That’s just ridiculous.” His stunned expression as he stares back at her makes me giggle even harder.

  “My thoughts exactly, Rylie,” I say as I walk over to her drawer and pull out her favorite Hello Kitty swimsuit. “Put this on. Come get me when you’re ready, okay?” She nods as she takes the swimsuit from my grasp, heading to the bathroom.