by RH Tucker
“What about your room?”
He stops and turns around to face me. As soon as he raises an eyebrow, I realize how my question could suggest an ulterior meaning.
I clear my throat, feeling my face heat up. “I mean … not that I want to see your room.” Take a deep breath, Izzy. “No, you know what? I do.” His brow is still raised, and he smiles, but now I know how to diffuse this situation. “I need to see the nerd lair.”
His jaw drops with a smile. “Wow, okay. And here I thought you were trying to seduce me.”
“In your dreams.”
He stands there, staring at me. It looks like he wants to answer back, but he doesn’t. Instead, he turns back around and starts walking. “All right, then. This way, Lady Nerd Girl.”
I follow him around a corner and up a flight of stairs. Just like everything else, the hallway and carpet on the stairs are flawless. The cream color looks like it’s never been stepped on, even though I know Matt has a little brother that probably makes as big of a mess as any other little boy his age would. There are a couple pictures hanging on the walls, all of them either of Matt or his brother, or both together. Matt looks like he was adorable as a little kid, with his hair still shaggy like it is now. Turning a corner at the top of the stairs I see one door with an ‘Isaac’ nameplate on it. Walking past it, we stop at a door that looks just as clean as the other doors we passed.
“Welcome to Casa de Matt,” he says with a confident grin, opening the door.
It’s like walking into a completely different house. Gone is the cream color carpet, the eggshell-white walls, and the showroom lighting that seemed to shine through the entire home. Inside, the floor is beige tiles, and his walls are a grayish-blue color, but I don’t see much of the paint because the walls are covered from floor to ceiling with posters. Comic books, anime, manga, video games. There are two huge bookshelves lined with volumes of graphic novels and manga. Fullmetal Alchemist, Batman, Green Lantern, One Peg. You name it, and it looks like he has it. His bed is made up nicely and is the only thing that doesn’t have some kind of geeky thing on it, just dressed in black and blue sheets and pillows.
Next to his bed sits a desk. The laptop is open, an Akira screen saver jumping around on the screen. There are little figures on the desk and on the shelves, but above the desk is a large shelf attached to the wall. Different models and figures are lined against it, and the thing that catches my eye the most is a figure of a character from Cowboy Bebop, Spike Spiegel.
“Oh, wow,” I say low as I walk over.
Examining the figures, there’s a Hulkbuster Iron Man figure, and a Darth Vader figure, but my eye keeps coming back to Spike.
His room is double the size of mine, but a third of it is made into what looks like a work area. I examine all the little things, all the books and posters, before making my way over to the area. There are three mannequin figures, all adorned with costumes. One has his Iron Man costume wrapped around it. I’m looking at it up close now, getting a much better look at it than when I saw it at the show. It’s still amazing. Next to that, is a Star-Lord costume that looks like it came directly from the set of Guardians of The Galaxy. The dark burgundy jacket has the fine details worked into it, and the mask with red eyes looks like it’s the actual prop.
The third costume is my favorite though because it’s of Cowboy Bebop again. It’s Spike’s suit. Dark blue with a yellow undershirt and the tie. Of the three it looks like it’s the easiest one to make, but it’s my favorite.
Turning around, Matt is watching me with caution. Gone is the confidence he greeted me with at the door and even before letting me into the bedroom. It’s like he’s waiting to see how I’m going to react to everything.
“Matt, this is amazing.”
“Yeah?” He sounds so unsure it’s almost painful.
“Yes! The posters, the books, it’s all incredible. And these costumes, they’re unbelievable. You’re terrific at costume design. And this?” I motion to the suit. “This is my favorite.”
“Really?” He sounds more at ease and walks over next to me. “You like Cowboy Bebop?”
“No.” My eyes stay on the suit for a moment before I look at Matt. “I love Cowboy Bebop.”
“Me too. It’s my favorite.”
“Oh yeah? Favorite episode?”
“Oh, come on, I can’t pick just one.”
“Okay, one of your favorites.”
“Mmm …” He looks at the suit then over at the Spike figure. “The Ballad of Fallen Angels.”
“Seriously?” I scoff. “That’s, like, everyone’s favorite.”
“Fine.” He taps a finger to his chin. “I mean, Asteroid Blues is great. It kicks off the series nicely.”
“True. I always loved Ganymede Elegy.”
“That’s a good one.”
I take another look around, examining everything for a second time, admiring it all. Then I turn and see Matt staring at me. “What?”
“Nothing, it’s just …” He bites his lip. “You’re the only person who’s seen this stuff.”
“Really?” I’m genuinely surprised. I remember him saying his best friend doesn’t know how big of a nerd he is, but it still catches me off guard.
“Well, I mean, other than my parents or Isaac. Yeah. Carter’s been over to the house, but we always just hang out in the den area, since we’ve got the big screen for movies and video games down there.”
I know I shouldn’t push the subject, but I can’t help thinking about it again. “Matt, seriously, you don’t have to hide this stuff.”
“Yeah, I do.”
“But why?”
“I’m not you, Izzy.” He turns away. “And I don’t mean just being as comfortable as you are with everything you like. You …” He takes a deep breath. I can feel how difficult it is talking about this stuff and I begin to regret bringing it up. “You don’t care.”
“Excuse me?”
“I don’t mean that in a bad way. I mean, whether you like something or not, you don’t care what people will think. It’s pretty amazing.”
“Why do you care so much?”
“I just do.” Something inside me wants to comfort him, so I walk over and grab his hand. “I wish I didn’t care if people laughed at me, but I do. I’m one of the popular jocks. I mean, I’m senior class president for crying out loud. I know the role I play, and I play it pretty good. And most days, I like the role I play. Besides, school’s almost over. I’m fine with everyone thinking they know who I am.”
“I’m sorry,” I whisper to him. I wish he didn’t feel like he had to hide something that seemed to make him so happy.
“Don’t be.” He finally looks at me with a grin. “I am really glad you’re getting to know me. The real me, I mean.”
“Me too.”
It’s then that I realize I’m still holding his hand. He looks down at me, and his serious look from our conversations has morphed into a smoldering one. His hair falls just over his forehead, but his eyes stay locked on me. Looking up at him, I can’t keep my eyes from looking at his lips, as I lick my own. My eyes shoot back up to meet his.
Bringing a hand up, his palm cups my cheek, before sliding along my jaw, as he runs his fingers through my hair. I’m not sure if he pulls me closer or I pull myself closer, but we’re as close as we’ve ever been. Finally letting go of his hand, I slide mine up to his shoulder. It’s as if time’s standing still, his lips so close to mine I can feel his breath. Then our lips meet.
My other hand shoots up, as I wrap both arms around his neck. His one hand still cradles the back of my head, fingers in my hair, while his other wraps around my waist, pulling me closer to him. There’s no feeling out stage. We don’t test the waters to see how he or I will respond to each other’s kiss. It’s like our minds have been waiting for this moment and we both knew it was going to happen.
His kiss does more than warm my lips; it heats my entire body. I pull him closer to me, taking a delicate bite into his
bottom lips. He lets out a soft moan, and before I know it he lifts me up, and now my legs are wrapped around him, as I’m leaning down to kiss him.
He steps back, sitting down on his bed and I stay on top of him, kissing and running my hands through his hair. His tongue glides across my bottom lip, and I wrap my arms around his neck tighter, attacking his tongue with mine. His hands move around my waist, finding the hem of my shirt and then snake underneath the material. My skin tingles as his finger runs across my back, then back down, as he cups my bottom, and I attack his lips feverishly.
Our lips break away suddenly when we both hear a door shut and someone yell.
“Matty!”
Matt’s eyes meet mine and the disappointment he shows echoes within me. I jump off him, adjusting my clothes and I see his swollen lips, shiny from my lip gloss. I quickly reach over, a finger sliding across his lips as he smirks at me before his door swings open.
“Matty, I just—”
Isaac stops abruptly, his eyes jumping between Matt sitting on the bed and myself, standing a couple feet away.
“Oh, sorry.”
“It’s okay.” I smile at him, still feeling my heart pounding inside.
Isaac stares at me for a moment and then back at his brother. “Were you guys exercising?”
I look over at Matt with an embarrassed smile and can see his chest still heaving as much as mine. He lets out an awkward laugh. “Uh … yeah, buddy. We were exercising.”
“Oh, okay,” Isaac says and then jumps on Matt’s bed next to him. It’s only after he’s sitting next to Matt that I see him holding a Nintendo 3DS. “I just got a new high score, check it out!”
Matt’s eyes meet mine for a moment, as he licks his lips and I have to take a deep breath to calm myself. “Cool,” he finally says as he looks over at his brother’s game.
“Hey.” Isaac’s head snaps up to meet my face. “I know you. You’re the contest judge.”
“Yeah,” I’m finally able to squeak out.
“Isaac, this is Izzy,” Matt says, his normal, confident smile returning. “Izzy, you’ve met Isaac before. Or, as I like to call him, iBoy.”
“Oh yeah, and why’s that?” I look to Isaac who rolls his eyes with a smile.
“Because he’s almost always on his iPad.” Matt laughs, and the sound just makes me warm up again. “Hey, Isaac, we actually have some homework to do.”
“Blah.” Isaac sticks his tongue out and jumps off the bed. “All right, I’ll be downstairs. Debbie’s cooking spaghetti tonight,” he says without taking his eyes off his console.
“Cool,” Matt answers as his brother walks out. He motions over to the door. “Actually, we should probably go downstairs. It might be …” He purses his lips together while giving me a look. “Safer.”
“For me or for you?”
He cocks an eyebrow up. “Both.”
I feel my cheeks warming up again and have to bite my lip to try and keep the smile from taking over my face.
Chapter 14
Matt
We finish going over what Tony would take throughout school, but all the while I can’t stop thinking about Izzy’s lips. Or how she smelled. Or how she felt. I can’t take my eyes off her as we work, and I keep seeing her glance over at me. Her eyes roam from my hair to my eyes to my lips.
I invite her to stay over for dinner, but she declines. When she gets her things to leave, I’m going to walk her out to her car, but she stops me at the door, telling me I don’t need to. She looks like she’s debating with herself on what she wants to do. While we’re still at the front door, she moves her hand as if she’s going to touch my arm. Then she jerks it back, turning around and walking over to her car. I blink, watching her walk to her car and drive away, unsure what’s going on. I know she felt the same thing I did in my room. She had to, right?
When I get to sociology the next day, I whisper that we should definitely meet up again for homework. I’m hoping for a positive response, but her shoulders stiffen, and she doesn’t even look back at me. The bell rings, and I just stare at the back of her head of the rest of class, unsure what’s going on. By the time class ends, I wait for a moment to see if she’ll turn around and even acknowledge me, but she doesn’t. Nothing.
Following her out of the room, I hurry to walk next to her.
“Izzy, hold up,” I call out. She slows down but doesn’t look at me. “Izzy?”
“What is it, Matt?” Her words are curt.
“Hold on a second.” I grab her arm. “What’s going on?”
“Nothing,” she says, finally meeting my eyes.
“Why are you ignoring me?” I can’t help how hurt my words sound.
She looks away. “I’m not.”
“You are.” I pause, waiting for her to lift her head up to look at me. “I’m sorry, okay?”
“For what?”
“I guess for kissing you? That’s the only thing I can think of why you’d be mad.”
“I’m not mad.”
“Then annoyed? What is it?”
Her eyes stay locked on mine as she takes in a long breath. “Matt, you don’t have to apologize for anything. But this …” She motions between us. “It’s not gonna work.”
“Seriously? Because it felt like it was working really well yesterday.”
“Yeah, at first.”
“What’s that mean?”
“I had time to think afterward, okay? As amazing as that kiss was.” I can’t help but smirk and raise an eyebrow. “Don’t. Yes, I enjoyed it. But we’re too different.”
“No, we’re not. Izzy, you know me. The real me.”
“Exactly, that’s why we’re too different.”
“What?” I pinch the bridge of my nose. “I’m not understanding.”
Folding her arms, she looks up at me with renewed confidence. “Matt, if I asked you to take me out. Would you?”
“Of course.”
“If I asked you to make out with me, right here, right now. Would you?”
I give her a curious grin. “Yeah?” I don’t understand the point she’s making, but if she’s going to ask me to kiss her again, I’ll happily oblige.
“If I wanted you to come sit with me during lunch and discuss the latest issue of X-Men, or talk about an episode of Attack on Titan, or just geek out over news that’ll come out of ComicCon this summer, then what would you do?”
A heavy weight of dread zips through me, and my automatic reaction is to look around, wondering if anyone heard her. No one did, but by the time my eyes find hers again, she flashes me a knowing grin.
“You see?”
“Izzy, that’s not fair.”
“No, it’s not.” She shakes her head. “It’s not fair to you, and it’s not fair to me.” Biting the inside of her lip, she raises up her hand to my cheek. “Sorry, Matt.”
Before I can say anything else, she turns around and heads down the hall.
I walk over to the quad and can’t help but look across the way to see Izzy sitting with her friends. I know she knows where I sit for lunch, but she doesn’t look up. Letting out a defeated sigh, I sit down at our table just as Micah gives Carter a nod and leaves.
I’m already in a grumpy mood, which is why I lead with my inappropriate question.
“Okay, what the hell is his deal?”
“What?” Emma looks over at me.
“You okay, man?” Carter shoots me a look.
“He’s here, and then when I show up, he leaves. Is Micah gay or something? Does he like me? Or does he just hate me? And if so, why?”
Emma and Jen exchange peculiar looks, and then in unison, break out in a cackling laugh.
“Did I say something funny?” I spit out.
“Micah isn’t gay,” Jen says between laughs. “He had a girlfriend.”
I gave Jen a blank stare. “I guess that’d be the first time a gay dude had a girlfriend then, huh?”
“Whoa, calm down, man.” Carter looks at me. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing,” I groan out and peek across the quad. Izzy is still talking to her friends, and she doesn’t look like she’s looking over anytime soon.
Carter follows my line of sight and then looks back at me. “Oh, I see.”
“What? What is it?” Emma turns around, making Jen follow suit.
“Nothing,” I say loudly, staring at Carter. “It’s nothing.” Carter mouths sorry back to me.
Emma and Jen both turn back around and flash me an unconvinced look.
“Anyways,” Emma elongates the word. “Okay, I’m not really supposed to say anything, but Micah just isn’t really comfortable around you.”
“But he’s okay with Carter?” I stare at her, confused.
“Well, Carter isn’t really friends with half the basketball team anymore.”
“What’s that have to do with anything.”
“Micah’s ex-girlfriend, Lana? She messed around with someone on the team. I still don’t know the details, or who it was, but something about seeing you just sets him off, and he starts thinking about her and what she did all over again.”
Now I feel like an ass. Here I am, getting mad at the guy, thinking he was being rude when he’s just hurt. I guess today is ‘Hey, everyone. Matt is an asshole’ day.
“Yo, Hillard,” someone calls out behind me, and I turn to see Oscar walking over.
“Hey.”
“Emergency ASB lunch meeting.”
“What?” I glare at him. “Mr. Garrison didn’t say anything about that this morning.”
“Yvette’s calling it.”
I’m about to ask why when I suddenly remember. “Crap,” I groan out. “Okay, I’ll be right there.”
Oscar turns around but not before checking out Jen. She notices, gives him an eye roll, and flips him off when he leaves.
“That dude is such a sleaze. I heard he’s hooked up with half the girls in color guard.”
Emma wrinkled her nose. “Gross.”
“Yeah, he’s on McCormick’s level,” I say, grabbing my bag. “I guess I gotta go.”