by Rinelle Grey
“Yes, it will be just the two of us. I hope I can trust you to respect my wish not to mate.”
Her voice wavered on the last word, uncertainty creeping into her voice. But not uncertainty about what he would do, uncertainty about her own willpower.
Calrian knew it. She could see it by the flare in his eyes. They narrowed into slits again, as they had at the dragon lair, and seemed to almost glow blue.
Rylee felt herself being drawn to him, and before she could even catch herself, her hand was on his leg, and she was swaying towards him.
He caught her shoulders and held her there, their faces inches apart. He searched her face.
“I will respect your wishes, Rylee,” Calrian said, his voice a low rumble. “I will remember that you do not wish this, even when you are taking actions to the contrary. Even if it is the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do.”
Rylee swallowed. It was so tempting. He was so tempting.
She had to remind herself, yet again, that these feelings weren’t real. They were created by the magical bond that tied them together.
That was why she couldn’t give in. She might feel like she wanted to kiss him, but it wasn’t really her.
She took a deep breath and pulled back. “Thank you.”
Chapter 14
Calrian wasn’t exaggerating when he’d said not kissing Rylee was one of the hardest things he’d ever done. He’d felt the pull of the Mesmer bond before, more times than he cared to admit, but it had never felt like this. Then again, he’d never tried to resist it before. He’d never needed to.
That had to be why this was so hard, didn’t it? Because he was fighting the magical bond that was supposed to encourage him to mate with her so he could regain his energy faster. Maybe the longer he put it off, the stronger it became.
But he couldn’t help feeling like this was more than just the pull of the Mesmer.
This felt far stronger than any Mesmer bond he’d experienced before. He didn’t want to resist it. Didn’t even want to try.
Giving in to temptation would be so easy. He knew that all he’d have to do was touch his lips to hers, and she’d be ready and willing. He could smell her arousal and see the flush of her cheeks. She wanted this as much as he did.
But those reactions were only there because of the Mesmer bond. Not because she was actually attracted to him.
She didn’t even have the experience he did to really understand that the Mesmer was temporary. Taking advantage of her, especially after she’d made her wishes clear, went against everything he believed in.
So he made himself take a deep breath and release her shoulders when she pulled back. He forced a smile and tried to pretend that every muscle in his body wasn’t aching to be closer to her.
He reminded himself why he was doing this… Of his sister. Of the dragon, Ultrima, who’d thought he had a right to mate with her just because she had felt something for him, despite the fact that she’d said no. Ultrima’s actions had caused the war that had led Calrian here.
No good came of ignoring someone’s wishes, no matter how much you believed they wanted to be with you too.
“Maybe we should keep our distance a little.” Rylee’s voice wobbled, and Calrian could only imagine how confusing this must be for her. “That might make it a little easier to resist each other.”
“Possibly,” Calrian allowed. “But it will also slow the process. The further apart we are, the longer the ritual will take to complete.”
Rylee heaved a sigh, and Calrian felt himself echoing the sound. This wasn’t going to be easy. For either of them.
They sat in silence for a few moments. Rylee was the one who broke it. “Your world must have been very different to ours. Maybe, since we’re sitting here anyway, you could tell me a little more about being a dragon, and what happened to your clan?” she suggested, a thread of determination in her voice. “Perhaps that will distract us.”
Calrian wasn’t convinced. Talking about his clan, about his worries, about what might have happened to them, was only likely to make him more concerned.
But he couldn’t really say no to Rylee, not after all she was doing for him.
So he took a deep breath and considered where to start.
“It all started when a lightning dragon, Ultrima, or Ultrian as he was known then, fell in love with my sister,” he said in a dark tone.
“A lightning dragon?” Rylee interrupted. “What does that mean?”
There really was a lot of explain. Calrian settled himself in for a long talk. Perhaps it would offer a distraction after all.
“There are six main types of dragon magic,” he told her. “Lightning dragons can create electrical energy, which is one of the most powerful kinds of magic. There’s also fire, water, wind, metal, and sound.”
“Which magic do you have?”
Calrian smiled. She was curious. He liked that. “I’m a water dragon.”
Rylee nodded, then pulled the conversation back on track. “Tell me about Ultrian.”
“Well, he thought he was in love with my sister. But she was promised to another dragon. Lirian had a seventh type of power, one that was very rare. He was one of our clan’s few life dragons. It was hoped that they would produce life dragon children, to help strengthen our clan.”
Rylee’s forehead wrinkled. “Was she in love with this Lirian? Or was she in love with Ultrian?”
Calrian wasn’t overly surprised that Rylee got straight to the heart of the matter. He’d already seen that she was very perceptive. “I believe she was in love with Ultrian, yes, though she wouldn’t admit as much. She certainly never pretended to love Lirian. But she was the eldest of our family, and thus would be queen one day. She felt it was necessary for her to put the needs of the clan above her own personal needs. She also knew that once she mated, she would love her mate no matter how she felt about him before that. And that she would have no further interest in Ultrian.”
“That doesn’t seem very fair.” Rylee’s frown didn’t dissipate. “Surely it would be better to mate with someone you love?”
Calrian tried to explain. “Love is different for dragons. When a pair of dragons mate three times, a magical bond is formed, similar to the one you and I have right now, only stronger, and unbreakable. It’s very difficult to tell where the magic ends and true feelings begin, just as it is for us now. It is normal for dragons to choose to mate for practical reasons, knowing that we will love our partner regardless of how we felt before the mating.”
“But what if you hated someone?” Rylee persisted. “Would those things you hated about them suddenly not be there anymore? Would you suddenly like them?”
Explaining this to a human wasn’t as easy as he’d thought. Their customs were so different, it was hard to find a point of connection. “I’m not sure I’ve ever heard of a dragon mating someone they hated,” he said. “Sarian certainly didn’t hate Lirian. She respected him and admired him.”
“But that’s not the same as love.”
“No, it’s not,” Calrian agreed. “But it was the decision she made.”
Rylee nodded, accepting it, if not understanding it. “So what happened then?”
Calrian took a deep breath to try to stop the pounding of his heart. He became angry whenever he thought about this part of the story. “My older brother, Warrian, caught Ultrian trying to force himself on my sister. He thought if he mated with her first, before she could mate with the life dragon, that she would love only him.”
To his relief, Rylee looked suitably incensed. “He mustn’t have really loved her then, if he couldn’t respect her choice.”
Calrian nodded agreement. “That was the conclusion the rest of us came to. Sarian and Warrian exiled Ultrian from the clan. Unfortunately, he had strong support among the lightning dragons, and he urged them to come with him. He and his kind split off from Rian clan, and formed their own clan, Trima clan. He even changed his name to Ultrima.”
Rylee was staring a
t him, her eyes wide. “That doesn’t sound good.”
“It wasn’t.” Calrian’s voice was grim. “Though those of us who remained in Rian clan may have outnumbered them, the lightning dragons were powerful, especially as a combined force. They attacked us several times. And on the last time I remember, all of my brothers and sisters were gravely injured. We entered the Mesmer sleep to recover, to be ready to fight again, and that’s all I remember.”
Rylee sucked in her breath. “Wow, that’s quite a story. No wonder you want to find them so badly.” She reached out and patted his leg again. She meant it to be comforting, but it had the opposite effect on him.
It stirred the Mesmer bond, desire and adrenaline mingling in his bloodstream, making him seethe with impatience. For her and for his mission. “I have to find them,” he said in frustration. “I have to find out what happened to them.”
Rylee didn’t tell him that was a crazy idea. Didn’t try to say that there was a chance the rest of his clan was long gone, perhaps wiped out by the Trima clan. She considered him for a moment, then said, “Well, if there’s no one at your lair, what about the places your other brothers and sisters were sleeping? Maybe there are clues there?”
That thought hadn’t even occurred to Calrian. But if his clan had been unable to wake him, it made sense that they might not have woken his brothers and sisters either. Maybe not quite everyone he’d known was gone.
Calrian nodded. “That is an excellent plan, and what I will do as soon as I have regained my energy.”
Rylee frowned. “Why wait? I could take you there now?”
Despite her offering exactly what he wanted, Calrian felt his heart sink. She wanted to get rid of him. That had to be why she was rushing him. And it was true that if he found his brothers and sisters, they could help him. Of course, even if they were there, they would be in the same predicament as himself—weak and with no way to quickly recover. Definitely in no position to take on a Trima dragon.
They couldn’t help him, he would be the one helping him. And he was in no condition to do that yet.
He would have to wait. It was just too risky.
“I can understand your urgency to help me find my clan. I know my presence here is awkward for you,” he said apologetically. “But it is too dangerous. A Trima dragon was guarding my Mesmer chamber. He was asleep and unaware that I left. But we might not be so lucky a second time. I can’t risk taking you into danger.”
Rylee put a hand on his arm, the touch sending a shiver up his spine.
“I’m not trying to get rid of you, Calrian.” Her voice was soft, and the way she said his name, slowly and deliberately, set his Mesmer charged blood racing. “I just want to help you find your family. It’s not good to be alone.”
Calrian certainly couldn’t dispute that. But there was one thing he could dispute. “I don’t feel like I’m alone, Rylee. Thank you for helping me.”
She blushed then, and Calrian could feel the strong pull between them. Stronger than anything he’d ever felt before.
He couldn’t help wondering about her comments earlier. Would the mating bond be different somehow, if you mated with someone you loved instead of someone you didn’t? Yes, the bond itself caused an attraction, but if the love was there first, would it be even stronger?
Just like this Mesmer bond was.
He stared at Rylee, wondering if she was thinking the same thing. But though he could tell from her scent that she was as aroused as he was, she didn’t show it in any other way.
Instead she said, “If there was a Trima dragon at your Mesmer chamber, how did you and Rowan get out without it noticing?”
It took Calrian a moment to convince his fuzzy brain to listen to what she was saying. When it sunk in, he frowned. “The Trima dragon was sleeping, so it didn’t see us. I suppose it was relying on sensing me if I woke and left, as dragons project a magical aura that is detectable to other dragons. But since I had virtually no magical energy, my presence wasn’t enough to wake him. Rowan, as a human, would be almost undetectable to him.”
Rylee grinned triumphantly. “Then that’s your answer. Now is the best time for you to go find your brothers and sisters, when you can slip past this Trima dragon without them noticing.”
Would it work? Calrian stared at her for a moment, trying to think. His energy was already higher than it had been when he’d left his own Mesmer chamber, but it was still so low he didn’t think he could even draw the water out of his own clothes to dry them. Surely it was too low to be noticeable to an enemy dragon, especially not if it was asleep like that one had been.
Of course, the Trima dragons weren’t the only problem with waking his siblings, just the most dangerous. But even if the Trima dragon weren’t in the way, he still needed to be able to get the chamber door open without the key, which was… had been… in his clan’s possession. Then once he managed to get into the chamber, his brother or sister would be as weak as he was and no help against the enemy dragon.
Still, it wasn’t like he had any better plans at this point.
“That just might work,” he said slowly.
That was when it hit him. If he did manage to find his clan, or even just his brothers and sisters, he would have no more need to remain near Rylee. The thought filled him with an unexpected sadness that even the Mesmer bond couldn’t explain.
Chapter 15
Rylee found herself caught in Calrian’s sorrowful gaze, and she couldn’t look away, even though she knew she should. He should have been happy. She’d helped him figure out a way to possibly find his clan, his family.
So should she.
And yet, what she was feeling from him and seeing in his eyes was a wave of sadness. One that her own heart echoed.
Was it because he was afraid his brothers and sisters wouldn’t be there? It had been at least a hundred years, more likely two or three, since he was last awake. There was every chance they were all long gone. He had to be thinking that was a possibility.
But his earlier words about not being alone stirred something in her.
Something dangerous.
The look he was giving her, as though he were drowning and she was his only lifeline, tugged at her heartstrings.
She knew how it felt to be lonely and to want to be close to someone, anyone, just to dull that feeling. That was what Calrian was feeling right now. He was grateful for her help, afraid he might never find his family, and desperate not to be alone, and perhaps he was in danger of mistaking that for something more, as she had with Eric.
She needed to keep her distance now, more than ever.
And yet, she didn’t move.
She had to admit, he was exciting. He stirred her blood in a way no man ever had. The stories he told, about wars fought over love, were fantastical. And yet, utterly believable.
Love made people do strange things.
And, if Calrian were to be believed, dragons could fall in love simply through mating each other. Could create some sort of magical bond, like the one she and Calrian were trapped in, only stronger.
Did dragons believe in love? Or did they all mate for other reasons?
It was a strange concept, and one that made her a little uncomfortable.
What if humans had this sort of bond? What if she had mated Eric and then been trapped loving him forever?
A shiver ran up her spine at the thought.
What if Calrian’s sister had mated this other dragon, Ultrian, and been trapped with him? From what Calrian had said, he wasn’t a very nice dragon if he had tried to force himself on her. Being mated to someone like that didn’t sound like it would be pleasant.
No, she didn’t like the sound of this dragon mating bond at all.
Which meant it was just one more reason why she needed to keep her distance from Calrian, no matter what her body was tempting her with. Of course, who knew if the bond would work between a dragon and a human, but given how effective this Mesmer bond was working between them, she somehow suspe
cted it would.
She dragged her eyes away from his and forced herself to stand up. “Well, it’s too late to do anything about looking for them today. Rowan will be home in an hour or so, and I need to be here to meet him. Especially after Dad’s warning earlier.”
“Actually,” Calrian said. “We might need Rowan’s help.”
Rylee frowned. She wasn’t too keen on involving her son in this. It would be dangerous. Not that Rowan would care. One suggestion and he’d be all in. “What do you mean?” she asked cautiously.
“It would be handy to know how he managed to get into my chamber. There’s a lock on the door, and I don’t have the key.”
Rylee put her hands on her hips. “This is the first you’ve mentioned a lock. What sort of a lock is it?”
“I didn’t mention it because it is not the main barrier to entry. The Trima dragons can’t even get close enough to use it. It was designed only as a way of manipulating the door, like a door handle.” Calrian held out his hands, his fingers making a circle. “There’s a place for a medallion, about this big. When you put in the medallion and turn it, then it opens the door.”
“A door handle that you take with you when you leave,” Rylee said dryly. She thought for a moment. “If it’s just a case of the key fitting in the space to allow you to turn it, we just need something to jam into the hole. I can bring some tools. Rowan must have done something similar. Probably he was poking it or something and managed to turn it. But I’d rather not ask him, as he’ll likely guess what we’re doing and want to come. I don’t want him hurt.”
Calrian nodded immediately. “Of course not. That should work.”
Rylee looked at him for a few more minutes, but he didn’t add anything more. So she made herself say, “I’d better get some cleaning up done. Make yourself at home.”
Calrian nodded, his expression understanding. “Thank you for your help,” he said again.