Katy nodded. She was still mad at Liam, but Jagan hadn’t done anything to deserve her wrath. Well, other than ignore Nikki. But that was amendable. Her accident, however, might not be.
“Wait. If you can’t fly, how did you get here?”
“I can now.” Katy couldn’t help grinning.
Jagan’s face broke into a grin as well. “Katy, that’s wonderful! You know what? We’ll have a party!” He grabbed her hands and swung her in a circle before letting go and lifting into the air. “Let’s go!”
“Actually…” Katy bit her lip. She considered telling him about whatever she had just. But now that she looked at it again, there was no discernable difference, and upon remembering Peter’s stern warning from Ethemu, she decided against it. Perhaps it would be better to tell Peter first. So she straightened and looked up at the bare branch ceiling once again. “I’m afraid I’ll need some help.” She sighed. “I stopped here because I got too tired to go on.”
“Of course. I’m sorry. But don’t worry. You’ll get stronger as you go. Here.” He stretched out his hand. “I’ll help you.”
Katy automatically stretched her hand out as well, but then she paused. After learning what she had about Nikki and Jagan, the last thing she wanted was to touch him for any reason. Also, she really would have liked to go back to the palace to see Peter. But making it all the way to the palace by herself on her first day of flight had been a far-fetched dream. She could see that now. Making it back to camp by herself wasn’t even an option.
Reluctantly, Katy put her hand in his. It was warm, but felt nothing like Peter’s, and once again, Katy felt guilty. Jagan, however, happily lifted them into the air once more, and Katy willed her wings to follow. One day at a time, she reminded herself, trying not to think about how her conscience poked at her for holding his hand. Soon she would try to help sort things out for Nikki, and she would set Jagan straight about her intentions. But right now, she simply needed to get back to camp.
20
More
As the sun set over the west side of the isle, Katy watched as the other fairies prepared for the party. Just as Jagan had promised, the moment they made it back to camp and her success had been made known, Donella had announced that a celebration was in order. There had been cheering and clapping, and everyone had immediately dropped what they were doing to get ready. Little lanterns containing blue lighting bugs had been hung by the dozen from tree branches, swaying gently with the little evening breezes, making the lights look even more alive than the bugs inside of them. The evening was cool but not cold, just enough to make Katy move closer to one of the outer bonfires. Even during the preparation, she could tell that the celebration would be the wildest and loudest she had ever seen. Downing’s harvest festivals and even the castle ball would be nothing compared to three dozen fairies around a bonfire.
Awe mingled with hope as she watched them. Fairies were already beginning to dance, performing complicated twists and turns and somersaults in the air as they gracefully whirled one another up and down. Many sang with the stringed instrument one of the female fairies played, and others clapped their hands to create a rhythm that went past one’s ears and into the soul.
As she watched, Katy marveled. For so long, she had been without a people. Now all she had to do was seemingly reach out and touch it. Something inside of her beckoned her to join in, something wild and ancient that tired of the human charade. Back at the summit in the session hall, they had seemed so human with only wings and marks to set them apart. But here in the light of the dancing fire, they looked feral and powerful, dangerous and lovely.
“Isn’t it magnificent?”
Katy looked up to see Jagan. He grinned as he sat down beside her. “And this is just a small group! Wait until you see one of the season festivals! Hundreds of fairies coming from all over the five isles to celebrate the changing of seasons. Different isles take turns hosting.”
“I never imagined anything like it.”
“This is for you, you know.” He leaned closer to study her. The firelight caught the red of the stubble on his chin and made him look much older than she had thought before. “Learning to fly is an important life step for each fairy. And most don’t learn as quickly as you did.” He cocked his head. “How do you do it?”
“Do what?”
He gave her a small smile and shook his head, but his eyes were serious. “You’re so different from what I expected.”
Katy let out a laugh. “I’m afraid that would be the story of my life.”
“No, in a good way.” He leaned his chin on his fist and continued to study her. “You’re the most powerful fairy I’ve ever seen—”
“You’re just saying that.”
“No, it’s true. And yet, you act like you don’t belong. As if…as if you’re afraid we’re going to turn you out for the smallest misstep.”
Katy wanted to deny what he said was true, but she sighed. “I suppose I am.”
He regarded her carefully. “Why?”
She shrugged. “I defied the chancels the first day I was here. Then I offended everyone by missing the supper that was supposed to be in my honor. Now…” She let out a rueful laugh. “I’ve managed to fail every challenge but one you’ve given me all week.” She looked up at the fairies dancing above them again. “I don’t deserve this. I didn’t earn a seat of honor.”
Jagan was quiet for a moment, but Katy could feel his eyes on her face. Finally, he turned back to the fire as well.
“Did Nikki tell you much about my past?”
Katy thought for a moment. “Only that Donella raised you and has been preparing you for life in politics.”
He nodded. “I was actually the son of a clan leader.”
She looked at him. “A what?”
“Each clan has a leader, or at least, a head family. My father was the leader of my clan on the First Isle. We weren’t a particularly large clan, but we held our own against the other clans and humans that might want to take our land. When my parents died of illness, however, it was my turn to take my father’s place. But my aunt challenged me.”
Katy frowned. “Was that allowable?”
He shrugged. “It’s in the laws. My powers hadn’t manifested, though, as I wasn’t even twelve, so when it was time for the challenge, I was severely beaten.”
Disgust rolled in Katy’s stomach. “Did she hurt you?”
“No. No, not at all. I’ve since realized that she was as gentle as she could be while still keeping victory. But I was ashamed and angry. And in my anger, I plotted something heinous.”
Katy shivered. The young man beside her had been nothing but sweet and congenial during their time together. But now, as she watched him relive those memories, his face had darkened, and his usually bright eyes were clouded with something…dangerous.
“That’s when Donella found me, thank Atharo.”
“Was she part of your clan?”
“No, she was already a Higher Chancel member at that point, though she wasn’t orator quite yet. But she was passing through to solve a dispute in another clan, and when she saw me, she immediately knew I was up to no good.”
“What did she do?”
Jagan’s face softened as he stared into the fire. “She took me with her. She said she was going to put my scheming to good use.” He chuckled. Then his face grew serious once more. “You’re not alone anymore, you know. I know how you feel. I’ve seen it on your face, and I remember what it felt like as a boy, not fitting in anywhere.” He took her hand and squeezed it before letting go. “But you’re home now. You don’t have to search or rely on the humans for acceptance any longer.”
Katy felt frozen as his words circled in her head. Was she searching still? She had been sure she was at home on the Third Isle. Muirin and Agnes had accepted her, and most of the servants had begun to smile at her when they walked by her or offered their services.
But deep down, she knew he was right. She had never truly felt lik
e one of them. She still felt very much other.
“Where…” Katy cleared her throat to clear her head. “Where’s Nikki?”
Jagan turned back to the fire. “She never returned from Donella’s errand, so I can only guess her father wanted her to stay with him for a few days.”
“What for?”
Jagan picked up a rock and began to examine it. “The man can’t ever decide if he’s going to keep her on a short leash or let her fly free.” He shook his head infinitesimally. “It’s not fair to her, but ever since his wife died, he’s been at a loss as to what to do with his daughter.”
Katy mulled on this as she studied the fire, but Jagan stood and held out his hand. “Enough of this sour talk. It’s time you learned how to dance.”
Katy’s first instinct was to say no. She didn’t want him thinking she was interested in raising his affections. But when she glanced up at the fairies above them, she realized with relief that everyone danced alone. A few had coupled off, but most were simply dancing for themselves. And when was the last time she had danced? When she’d beat Saraid at Peter’s ball? And that had been not for joy but for victory. When was the last time she had danced for fun? When she was eight years, maybe. Possibly ten.
“Alright,” she said with a grin, and took his outstretched hand.
He led her up to the edge of the fae gathering in the sky. “Close your eyes,” he said. “Feel the music. You’ll know what to do.”
“How?”
“You’re a fairy,” he replied. “You may have been raised by humans, but your blood is as pure as that of anyone here.”
Katy closed her eyes and let the rhythm sink in. At first it was strange to sway while she flew, but her wings were quickly growing stronger, and soon her body began to turn with the music as well. A few more songs passed, and she was laughing as she spun and darted up and around with the rest of the dancers. Never had she felt so untethered. Her heart soared as though it had broken free of some invisible fetter she didn’t know she had. All those years of being told to hide her true nature had burdened her for as long as she could remember, and now the fire that had hidden inside her soul was finally allowed to burn bright into the night.
“I wish Peter was here.” She laughed as she dared to do a flip. She imagined Peter’s expression when she showed him what she could do. “He would love this.”
“I hope he knows how fortunate he is.”
Katy stopped whirling and opened her eyes to see Jagan staring at her with an inscrutable look. “What do you mean?”
For once, there was no smile on Jagan’s face. “I just wish you understood that you have more than one choice.” He swallowed. “Maybe that wasn’t true before. But it is now. And you’re so blinded by him that you can’t even see anything else, even when you have the world at your fingertips.”
Katy stared after him as he flew off into the night. When he didn’t return, she looked at the other dancers, who seemed oblivious to what had just happened. Before she could decide what to make of it, though, the music came to a stop, and a horn sounded low and deep.
“In honor of our autumn fairy’s first flight,” an old male fairy with silver hair and wings said as he gestured to Katy, “tonight, we shall have a tale.”
Katy blushed as the entire group seemed to look at her. To her relief, though, no one decided to continue staring. Rather, they all descended to sit on the grass, on boulders, and in tree branches surrounding the old fairy. Katy followed and seated herself beneath a large tree.
“Where is Jagan?” someone whispered in her ear.
Katy jumped at Donella’s sudden proximity. When her heart slowed, however, she whispered back, “He left.”
“That’s strange.” Donella shrugged. “Oh well. He’s heard it before.” Then she smiled. “You’re going to like this.”
“This is a tale of mystery and spirit, of wonder and legend,” the old man continued. “For all fairies should know of the tale of Aisling.”
“Who is that?” Katy asked Donella.
“Oh, that’s Morvyn. He’s one of our story keepers. Fae don’t keep many books the way humans do. Instead, we have keepers who learn the stories and teach them to others. That way we don’t forget who we are like the humans tend to do.”
Katy had to admit that Donella had a point. Humans had many books, but they rarely read them. A large number, at least on her isle, didn’t even know how to read.
If she and Peter somehow survived this ordeal and got married, Katy vowed to do something about that one day.
“Aisling,” Morvyn said, “has lived since the birth of our isles, and yet she has never lived.”
“What?” Katy whispered.
“He means we can’t be sure if she was myth or legend,” Donella said. “There have been stories as long as fae can remember, but no one actually knows if she was ever actually real.”
“She has wandered from one end of the King’s Isle to the other and back again since the High King died, bemoaning his death,” Morvyn continued in his deep, rumbling voice. “Sometimes she will visit this isle or that, but only draped in shadow, and always to return here.”
“Does…does she talk to people?” Katy asked. Everyone turned and looked at her. “I mean, directly,” she mumbled, her face turning red from all the attention.
“She doesn’t talk to people,” said one of the older women kindly. “It’s just a story.”
“That’s not necessarily true,” someone called out from the back. “My grandfather’s grandfather claimed he heard whispers on the wind telling him to stay home the day of a large storm. He didn’t listen and was struck by lightning.”
“Aye,” someone else added. “And my neighbor’s grandmother’s aunt once claimed she heard whispers on the day of the great flood of the Second Isle. Claimed it until the day she died. Said the warning helped her save her entire village.”
“Why do you ask?” Donella asked kindly.
Once again, all eyes turned to Katy.
“I…” She took a deep breath. “I heard whispers today. When I was falling.” She paused, daring to search the faces around her for some sort of nod or understanding. “She …at least, I think it was a she. Some voice reminded me to breathe.” Katy took a deep breath as she recalled that afternoon. “If she hadn’t, I might have died.”
The camp went deathly silent.
Katy looked at Morvyn again. “What does that mean?”
“It means,” Morvyn shared a long look with Donella, “that Aisling has given you her blessing. She, too, seems to think that we need the autumn fairy now more than ever.”
21
This Changes Nothing
“How long will I have before the tests?” Katy asked as they neared the palace. Her wings were growing tired. They’d strengthened considerably in just the last day, but she wasn’t sure they were ready for anything strenuous.
“Not very long.” Donella reached back and took Katy’s hand to steady her as they began to descend. “Did you enjoy the view?”
“Not as much as I imagined.” Katy twisted her mouth as she focused on landing.
“Are you nervous?”
Katy nodded as her feet touched the cobblestones. “It’s difficult to think that Peter might suffer because I fail.”
“I hardly think that will be a problem.” Donella squeezed her hand before letting go. “Just remember what Morvyn said last night. If Aisling was encouraging you, then you have nothing to fear. Now, I need to go see to a few last-minute details before the test begins.” She glanced at the palace doors, and Katy followed her gaze. Peter was nearly running toward her he was walking so fast. Donella smiled. “Take a little time to yourselves. You’ve earned it.”
As she walked away, Peter scooped Katy into a bear hug, and Katy inhaled deeply of the familiar scent of pine and leather. Possibilities and changes were so easy to imagine when she was out in the fields of Summer with the other fairies nearby. But even just the scent of Peter’s tunic brought h
er back down to reality with him and her future on the Third Isle, surrounded by humans and human traditions. And though she was elated to see Peter, as always, she couldn’t help feeling a little wistful about the prospect of returning to life without others of her kind. A month was really such a short amount of time.
“Don’t ever leave me again,” Peter groaned as he hugged her tight.
Katy laughed. “It’s only been two days.”
“People are insufferable.”
“Humans? Or fairies?”
“Everyone,” he growled. “I’m half tempted to grab you now and make a break for the nearest boat we can find. Maybe we’ll get stranded on a desert island somewhere far away.”
“How were your lessons?”
Peter snorted. “My lessons were sessions. Thousands of sessions. Hours of sitting and waiting to grow old and die.”
Katy laughed again when he finally let her go. “You look dashing.” Her heart thumped a little unevenly as she took in his sturdy black boots, his freshly shined armor, and the haircut someone must have wrestled him down to give.
“They made me do it.” He grimaced. “Something about being prepared for anything during the test, which I can’t understand. Anyone who’s sat through half a session needs a sleeping gown rather than a sword.” He looked down at her fairy attire. His eyes widened, but to her surprise, it was only for a second before they clouded over again.
Katy frowned. “What is it?”
Peter took her hands in his and stared at them. “I had wanted to wait until we had more time, but it looks like we won’t get much of that. And I need to talk to you.” He glanced up. “It’s important.”
“Now?” She glanced around.
His brow furrowed as he stared at the hand he was holding. “Like I said, I wanted to wait. But with the test coming so soon, I felt like you should know.”
“Alright.” Katy stood taller. “What have you seen?”
“Abuses of power in particular. By the Higher Chancel especially, but the Lower Chancel, too. It’s like this place has two—”
The Autumn Fairy of Ages Page 18