Moonlight and Ashes

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Moonlight and Ashes Page 4

by Rosie Goodwin


  When their dad used that tone of voice the twins knew better than to argue. They hastily washed in the cold water that stood on the washstand in their unheated bedroom, then changed into their night clothes and clambered into Lizzie’s bed. Almost immediately, the sound of raised voices came up the stairs to them, and Lizzie began to cry.

  Danny cuddled her close. ‘Don’t cry, Lizzie. Happen Dad just got out o’ bed the wrong side this mornin’, eh? Or perhaps he’s tired. They’re makin’ parts fer tanks an’ all manner o’ things at the Dunlop now, yer know. They don’t keep the parts in the factory though. Once they’re made they send ’em to what they call shadow factories on the outskirts o’ the city.’

  ‘How do you know all this, an’ why do they send ’em away?’ asked Lizzie, greatly impressed with her twin’s knowledge.

  ‘I know ’cos I heard Mr Massey tellin’ one o’ the other neighbours about it. They do it to stop houses with people in ’em from gettin’ bombed.’

  While both children tried to puzzle this out, they eventually went to sleep with the sound of their parents’ raised voices in the background of their dreams.

  The following day brought the first snow - and cries of delight from Danny when he got up and drew aside the bedroom curtains.

  ‘Hey, Liz, come an’ look at this. Everywhere looks brand new.’

  Lizzie yawned and stretched before reluctantly leaving the warmth of the bed to join him at the window, where she peered out into the eerie grey light. The rows of sooty rooftops were sparkling white and everywhere looked clean and bright.

  After quickly washing and struggling into their school clothes they hurried down the stairs to find their mam stirring a big pan of porridge on the stove. Bursting into the room, Danny asked, ‘Mam, have yer seen the—’ He stopped abruptly when he caught sight of the big purple bruise that covered the whole of her left eye.

  Seeing his horrified reaction she self-consciously raised her hand to cover it. ‘Clumsy Clogs has been at it again,’ she smiled. ‘I reckon I’m becoming a walking disaster.’

  ‘How did you do it?’ Danny asked as Lizzie looked on in silent horror.

  ‘Never mind that now. Your breakfast is ready, so come to the table and get it, else you’ll be late for school.’

  Hearing the note of impatience in her voice, the twins silently did as they were told. Breakfast was a quiet affair and they were almost glad when they set off for school in their shiny Wellington boots. But somehow the snowfall didn’t seem quite so important now.

  It was almost lunchtime when Maggie’s back door opened and David appeared, clutching a rather bedraggled Christmas tree.

  ‘It looks as if it’s taken a bit of a bashin’, I’m afraid, but there aren’t that many to . . .’ The words died on his lips when he saw her eye. ‘Looks like you have, an’ all. Just how the bloody hell did you get that - as if I need to ask.’ He was lit up with anger like a beacon.

  ‘David, I think you’d better sit down. We need to talk,’ Maggie told him wearily.

  Without a word, he sat down on the hard-backed chair at the kitchen table, but never once did his eyes leave her face.

  ‘David . . .’ She struggled to find the right words. ‘It has to end.’

  ‘What has to end?’

  ‘You know exactly what. Look at this,’ she stabbed a finger towards her eye. ‘Can you really blame Sam for feeling as he does, given the circumstances? He’s as trapped in this marriage as I am.’

  ‘Rubbish!’ The word exploded from David’s lips like a bullet from a gun before he even had time to think about it. ‘He was always the same, right from when we were kids. Anything I had, he wanted - and that included you.’

  ‘But you never really did have me, did you?’ she said softly. ‘What I mean is, we weren’t engaged or anything. We hadn’t even been going out together for all that long when I—’

  ‘When my brother got you drunk and into bed and pregnant - is that what you’re trying to say?’ All the pent-up rage and resentment that he had locked inside for years spewed out of him now as she hung her head in shame.

  ‘Maggie, admit it. He tricked you. We loved each other and you would never have gone to bed with him if you hadn’t thought he was me.’

  ‘It doesn’t really matter now, does it?’ Her voice was tired. ‘I did get pregnant by him and he did the honourable thing by marrying me. The trouble is, he’s never forgiven me for loving you, and while you’re still on the scene we’ll never be a proper family. The children are getting older now and it’s not fair for them to see this all the time. He’s eaten up with jealousy. So, if you do still love me, then you have to let me go. He deserves a chance. It’s time you and I put the past behind us.’

  Shock registered on his face as he stared back at her. ‘Maggie, you know I would still have married you, even when you found out it wasn’t me that you’d slept with. Why did you have to go and marry that bastard?’

  ‘Because it wasn’t right that you’d be bringing up his children,’ she told him dully.

  David could hardly believe what he was hearing, and yet somehow he knew that she meant every single word. This was the end. The end of all the years he had hoped she would leave Sam and come back to him.

  ‘It doesn’t have to be like this, you know.’ He took her hands in his and gently shook them up and down. ‘Just say the word and I’ll take you and the children somewhere safe until this bloody war is over. Then when I come back we can start again.’

  She smiled at him sadly through a haze of tears. ‘If this were a fairy story then it might work. But this is real life. It’s got to stop - now, David - and we both know it, deep down.’

  His wonderful brown eyes filled with tears and he dropped her hands. ‘Are you quite sure about this?’

  She nodded. ‘He deserves a chance.’

  Collecting his hat, he walked towards the door and turned the handle feeling as if the bottom had dropped out of his world.

  ‘David?’

  He turned, locking the sight of her away in his memory.

  ‘May God go with you and keep you safe.’

  Slipping through the door, he closed it quietly behind him.

  Chapter Four

  As Ellen looked across at her daughter, her eyes were full of concern. Maggie looked awful, though now she came to think of it, none of them looked at their best. Christmas had been a sombre affair this year and so was New Year. Usually the New Year would get off to a fine start, with neighbours in and out of each other’s houses, and wine and beer flowing like water. But this year no one seemed to have the heart for it, and the black-out restrictions hadn’t helped.

  But there was more to Maggie’s haggard appearance than that, her mother was sure of it. She hadn’t seemed herself since David had returned to his base. Perhaps it was a good thing that he had gone, Ellen Sharp thought privately. Sam seemed a lot more relaxed since his twin had left and she’d noticed that Maggie hadn’t had a black eye or a split lip for a while.

  Ellen had always been a great believer that everything happened for a reason, and she could only pray that things would work out for them. Sighing, she lifted the newspaper and the headlines leaped out at her:

  Jan 1st London - Two million 19 to 27 year olds called up.

  ‘Don’t bear thinkin’ about, does it?’ she commented.

  Maggie shook her head in reply. ‘No, it doesn’t. I just wonder how long it will be before the men in Coventry start getting their call-up papers?’

  ‘Not long, the way things are goin’.’ Ellen shuddered at the thought, grateful that her old man was too old.

  Just then, the twins burst into the room like a breath of fresh air. They had been out playing in the snow and their dimpled cheeks were rosy. They were due back at school in a few days’ time and intended to make the most of every second of their freedom.

  ‘We just saw Mrs Massey an’ she reckons as she’s going to have a big surprise fer us later on,’ Danny informed the two women excite
dly. ‘What do yer think it will be, Mam?’

  Maggie winked at her mother. She knew exactly what the surprise was but had no intention of spoiling it for them.

  ‘Happen you’ll know soon enough,’ she teased.

  Danny pouted, and crossing to his grandma, who already had Lizzie on her lap and Lucy playing with her wooden bricks at her feet, he planted a wet kiss on her wrinkled cheek.

  ‘Do you know what the surprise is, Gran?’

  She laughed. ‘I might. But as yer mam says, you’ll know soon enough an’ if we tell yer it won’t be a surprise, will it?’

  ‘Aww . . .’ Peeling his wet coat off, Danny flung it across the back of a chair and held his hands out to the fire. Grown-ups could be no fun at all sometimes!

  Turning her attention back to Maggie, Ellen asked, ‘So what do yer think to the rationin’ then?’

  ‘From what I’ve heard we’re going to be issued with ration books for butter, sugar, bacon and ham, though to be honest they’ve been in short supply for some time now. Half the boxes on the shelves in the corner shop are empty already.’

  ‘Don’t I know it,’ Ellen muttered, disgruntled. ‘Beats me how you manage to feed this brood. It ain’t so bad for me wi’ just the two of us to worry about. Don’t get frettin’ though. I dare say me an’ yer dad will have a bit goin’ spare so don’t struggle. Just shout up if yer runnin’ short of owt.’

  ‘I will, Mam, thanks.’

  Lifting Lizzie from her lap, Ellen rose from the table and stretched painfully. ‘Ooh, I don’t mind tellin’ yer, this bloody snow don’t do nothin’ fer me arthritis. Still, complainin’ ain’t goin’ to make any difference, is it? An’ sittin’ here won’t get yer dad’s dinner cooked either so I’d best be off.’ Crossing to the door she began to pull on her fur-lined boots. They’d been a Christmas present from Maggie and she loved them. Then came the thick red coat that she had bought for a snip from the rummage sale not long ago. Finally she tied a warm woollen head square under her chin and began the ritual of kissing the children goodbye.

  ‘Right now, you lot - be good fer yer mam. An’ be sure to pop over an’ tell me what Mrs Massey’s surprise was later, eh?’

  The twins nodded in unison as she let herself out into the bitterly cold yard, cursing loudly as a fall of snow slid off the sloping kitchen roof and landed on her head. They were still laughing as they heard her clomping off down the entry.

  ‘Anyone would think me gran were goin’ to the North Pole instead of just across the Lane, the way she dressed up,’ Danny giggled.

  ‘That’s because she’s old, an’ old people have to keep warm. Miss Timpson at school told us that,’ Lizzie said importantly. Miss Timpson was Lizzie’s teacher, a pretty young woman with huge dark eyes and a mass of curly black hair, who wore lovely red lipstick. Lizzie adored her and believed every word she said.

  Maggie now suggested, ‘Why don’t you two read your comics for a bit now and get warm while I put the dinner on?’

  The twins nodded and soon were lost in the adventures of Desperate Dan and the Bash Street Kids.

  Sam arrived home in a very black mood that night. ‘This bloody war is goin’ from bad to worse,’ he grumbled as he took off his coat and hung it on a hook on the back of the kitchen door. ‘Word has it that the Union Castle liner has been sunk off the south-east coast by a mine. They reckon a hundred and fifty-two men are missin’, feared dead.’

  Maggie shuddered as she strained the cabbage into a colander in the sink. How must they be feeling, the women they had left behind? Each of those poor men, some of them little more than boys, was someone’s husband, brother, son, friend or lover. It hardly bore thinking about. Every day the newspapers were full of horror stories about the bombings in London and the lives that were being lost there too. But she didn’t have long to dwell on the fact, for suddenly a tap came on the door and Mrs Massey, her face wreathed in smiles, popped her head into the room. Behind her were Carol and Tony.

  Danny squealed with delight as he leaped off the chair and rushed across to his friend, whom he had missed dreadfully. ‘Tony! What you doin’ back here?’

  Mrs Massey answered for him. ‘Couldn’t see the point in keepin’ ’em away from home any longer. Seems like London’s the target fer the bombs, not us, thank the Lord. So I thought, Ah, sod it. Let the poor little buggers come back where they belong. I ain’t the only one thinkin’ that way either. There’s quite a few gradually creepin’ back home. Happen we were a bit too hasty sendin’ ’em away in the first place. Christmas made me mind up. It were like a bloody morgue round there wi’out these pair.’ As she spoke she ruffled Tony’s hair and he grinned up at her as Carol snuggled into her mother’s side and smiled shyly at Lizzie.

  The boys were already chattering away ten to the dozen, but seeing that Sam was looking irritable, and Maggie was in the middle of putting the dinner out, her neighbour didn’t want to impose.

  ‘Come on, you two. I suppose I’d better think about feedin’ you an’ all.’ When Tony and Danny groaned she chuckled. ‘Never mind, lads. Yer can get together tomorrow.’

  ‘Yes, an’ I’ll show you our Anderson shelter,’ Danny piped up. ‘Mam’s made it like a little house inside, wi’ beds and chairs an’ everythin’. We ain’t had to sleep in it yet though.’

  ‘God willin’ yer never will,’ Mrs Massey said, and herding the children back towards the door she disappeared the way they had come.

  ‘So that were the surprise Grandma Sharp were on about, was it?’ Danny’s whole face was alight as Maggie nodded.

  ‘Yes, it was. But never mind that for now. Get those comics and that sketching-pad off the table an’ let’s get the cloth on and the dinner out before it gets cold, eh? Lizzie, you fetch the cruet, and Danny, you put the knives and forks out. Sam, love, will you put Lucy’s bib on an’ get her into the highchair, please.’

  ‘I saw Grandma Bright this afternoon when I were out playin’ earlier on,’ Danny informed them as he shovelled a loaded forkful of herring roes into his mouth.

  ‘Did you? It’s a wonder she didn’t call in for a cuppa then,’ Maggie remarked.

  ‘She didn’t have time ’cos she’d had to queue at the shop, but she said she’d be round tomorrer. She’s had a letter from Uncle David.’

  Maggie’s stomach did a somersault as she kept her eyes fixed on her food. Opposite, she could see her husband’s eyes narrow as he swallowed a mouthful of bread. Funnily enough, she got on well with her mother-in-law, which was more than could be said for Sam. He and his mother had never seen eye-to-eye because Sam always insisted that David was her favourite.

  ‘Grandma says that Uncle David was glad to get shipped out ’cos he was fed up o’ square-bashin’. But she don’t know where he’s gone. He weren’t allowed to tell her.’

  ‘What’s square-bashin’?’ Lizzie asked innocently.

  ‘It’s when they make you march up an’ down the—’

  ‘Danny, could you please just eat your dinner!’ Maggie’s nerves were stretched to the limit but her sharp tone had the desired effect because Danny became silent and bent his head across his plate.

  As January 1940 progressed, the people of Coventry became more and more concerned. Hitler continued to march through Europe leaving a trail of destruction and death in his wake. Leaflets popped through their doors telling them what to do in the event of being bombed, and an air of gloom settled across the city as the war they had all prayed would soon be over raged on.

  Even so, more evacuees began to drift home and slowly the classrooms filled up again.

  They were almost at the end of January when the storms struck. Torrential rain and gales swept across the country, and Maggie began to feel like a prisoner in her own home, for Lucy had come down with a terrible hacking cough and she didn’t dare to venture out with her.

  Mrs Massey and the rest of the neighbours made sure that she had everything she needed and Maggie wondered how she could ever thank them.

 
‘There yer go, me gel,’ Mrs Massey puffed as she placed the meagre rations on the table one bitterly cold Thursday morning. ‘Though how far four ounces o’ butter will go between five of yer to feed I dread to think.’

  ‘Thanks, Mrs Massey. You will stay for a cup of tea, won’t you?’ Maggie offered gratefully.

  ‘Well, are yer sure as yer can spare it?’ the kindly neighbour asked uncertainly.

  Maggie laughed aloud. ‘I hardly think one cup of tea is going to make much difference, do you? It’s the least I can do for you after how good you’ve been to me over the last couple of weeks. I dread to think what I would have done without you. Now come on, take that wet coat off and get over by the fire.’

  Mrs Massey shrugged her plump arms out of her sodden coat, and hanging it over the wooden clotheshorse, she obediently crossed to the fire and held her hands out to the comforting blaze. They were still able to get coal, which was one blessing at least.

  ‘So how’s the little ’un doin’?’ She glanced at Lucy who was fast asleep under a blanket on the settee.

  ‘Not so good, to be honest.’ Maggie carefully measured two spoons of tea into the heavy brown teapot. ‘I had the doctor out to her the other night and he gave me some medicine, but it doesn’t seem to have done much good up to now. If anything, I think she’s worse.’

  When Mrs Massey placed a hand on the child’s brow, she frowned. ‘Poor little mite is burnin’ up!’ she exclaimed, and much to Maggie’s horror she promptly whipped the blanket off her and rolled up her sleeves.

  ‘Get me some cool water in a bowl,’ she ordered. ‘We need to bring her temperature down. The way you’ve got her wrapped up, she’ll be cooked in no time.’

  Something about the tone of her neighbour’s voice made Maggie hurry away to do as she was told. Soon Mrs Massey had the child undressed down to her Liberty bodice, and as Maggie looked on with a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach, she began to sponge the child down. Lucy whimpered and tossed her head from side to side, but Mrs Massey spoke soothingly to her until she was satisfied that she was a little cooler.

 

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