I blink, but I notice her lips have not moved with her words. I glance at Crowe to see his attention focused on her. He stills beside me as if he’s waiting for my greeting before my eyes catch the small smile reappearing on Hyacinth’s face.
I know you can hear me. You did yesterday, her tiny voice floats through my mind again as she raises her brow.
A-are you in my head? I ask in a thought, scrunching up my face to stare her down. My eyes flick to Crowe, wondering if he can hear the conversation as well, but his face remains the same. Only me and her are involved in this conversation. Why are you in my head?
Congratulations, Lilith, it seems as if we both have the same power.
“Lilith! Are you okay?” Crowe calls, waving his hand in my face.
I nod and my eyes come back to focus. “Huh? Y-yeah, I’m fine,” I manage, tearing my eyes away from Hyacinth to stare at him.
“Are you gonna say hi or just stand in the middle of the room for the rest of the afternoon?” he inquires, raising an eyebrow as if he believes me to have lost my mind.
I clear my throat, openly annoyed for his tone, but at the same time I’m fascinated by the tiny girl as well. My gaze goes back to her, and I dip my head, feeling drawn to her as if her gaze had hypnotized me. She glances at the floor, a hint of a chuckle passing her lips, and I realize she read my thoughts.
We’ll talk soon, she promises.
I’m excited by the prospect though I have no idea what I can say to that. Of all the people I’ve met in The Council, she is the only one I believe could be a friend. She reminds me of a mix between Helena and Fern, and suddenly, I’m glad she can read my mind. Otherwise, I would’ve never let her in to find that out. I ponder the idea of her helping me hone my power…or at the very least helping me come to an understanding of why I’m developing it.
“The Sage will want to know you’re back,” Crowe informs me, drawing his eyebrow down as his gaze shifts between me and Hyacinth. There’s a knowing gleam in his eyes, as if he can guess there’s something between us that goes deeper than surface level.
I nod and step toward The Sage’s door, once again out of words to argue. Crowe knocks for me, his eyes shining with an unknown emotion before sending me inside. I limp down the corridor, fingers tracing the stones with dread of the conversation before me. Part of me has the feeling she’ll force me into the Witch’s Oath she promised before I traveled to Ignis to make sure my attitude doesn’t take another plummet south.
“Lilith, my dear. Feeling better?” she prompts, glancing up at me from her usual seat beside the window as I emerge into her room. The scent of herbs fills the air though this time she has a book on the table before her rather than her usual cauldron. Fern’s words play in my mind as if they’re on repeat as I gaze at her.
“Yes, thank you,” I state politely, dipping my head to her.
“Has Crowe introduced you to everyone?” she asks, closing her book as I once again awkwardly take my seat across from her.
I nod and stare at the detailed red cover as she taps her bony fingers on it. “I think so. There’s so many faces, it may take me a while to get the hang of things.”
“It’ll all come in due time. Now that your mind is set, you’ll be able to properly focus,” she says.
“May I ask you a question?” I consider calling her ma’am to show an attempt at civility, like we agreed upon, but it sticks in my throat, and I hope my even tone will be enough to cover it.
She arcs an eyebrow. “Only if I may be inclined to ask you one first.”
“Anything.” I wring my hands together, wondering what The Sage could possibly have to ask me. Judging by the look on her face, I won’t like it.
“How long have you been able to read minds?” she ponders, boring into me with the wisdom in her eyes.
I stiffen, caught off guard by the question. My nails dig loudly into the soft material on the chair as I try to hide the reaction. “Who says I can do that?”
“I caught it during our last talk. I’m The Sage for a reason—there’s not much I don’t notice around here.”
“Right.” I sigh, scratching the back of my neck with the disheartening realization that between her and Hyacinth, I’ll be incapable of keeping anything to myself from now on. “Like the rest of my powers, I’m not very good at it yet.”
“I don’t expect you to be. I think part of your struggle of coming to terms with your role at The Council is believing we expect perfection from you right away. We don’t—all we ask is you do your best. For every power you show a slight inclination to developing, we will find a way to bring it out, guaranteed.”
I bob my head to her words, eyes trained on the edge of her desk.
“On a side note, I think Hyacinth is thrilled to see what you can do.”
It seemed like it, I think, noting the pretty girl’s face from a few minutes prior.
Aww, that’s sweet of you, Lilith!
Hyacinth? Get out of my head.
“I’m wondering if you would benefit from training with all the members of The Council,” The Sage says, tapping her fingers on her book as a coy smile crosses her ancient face.
“All of them?” I ask, tightening my face with a list of powers each are capable of running through my mind. “I mean no disrespect, but Rayna and Lynx couldn’t possibly have a thing to teach me. I really don’t think Crowe has much to offer me either besides teaching me the ropes.”
The small smile spreads across The Sage’s lips. “That’s where you’re wrong, my dear! You’d be surprised what a lot of focus and determination can really do.”
“Wait…are you saying…” I pause for a moment, holding a hand to my lips as I stare at her. It’s hard to tell the true intention behind The Sage’s actions, but this time I can see through the veil. “Do you think I’ll develop their powers?”
She shrugs. “As you know, anything is possible.”
Besides living a normal life.
The Sage purses her lips at my thought. “You must be getting sleepy, so I’ll wrap this up; I’m telling you not to sell yourself short, dear. You’ve come a long way in such a short time. Don’t give up. Remember, people thought you were just another UnEquipped a little over a week ago.”
I ponder her words and sink into the chair, feeling as if my lungs are made of lead. It’s odd to think about the whirlwind of events that have happened to me in such a short time. I feel as if I’ve lived half my life in only a handful of days. I still feel the same as I did, but I’m not who I used to be.
I can’t be.
I may have gained a handful of powers but they came at the cost of losing those close to me. My parents are a bridge I can no longer cross and Helena is close behind them. I’m closer to Clio, but with my new job, I have the sinking feeling that I’ll eventually lose him as well.
“Can I ask my question now?” My voice is weak, hard to hear to my own ears as I struggle to sit up. When I find it, I hardly give her time to nod before I proceed. “Do you know about me…the truth, I mean?”
The Sage clasps her hands together and leans back in her seat. “I had the feeling you would ask me that.”
“Is that a yes?” I ask desperately, heart pounding in my chest as I sit on the edge of my seat in the moment of truth.
“I know many things, but that doesn’t mean it would be right of me to tell,” her ancient voice states, picking up a new book from the pile beside her chair.
“W-what does that mean?” I ask, slumping my shoulders with the overwhelming feeling of defeat washing over me. My fingers dig into the edge of her desk as I unknowingly lean as close to her as I can without crawling on top of it.
“There are things in this life that you must face alone. Birth is one of them—death is another. Sometimes, things won’t appear to you until it is the right time for you to know.”
I stare at her in disbelief thinking that’s the biggest line of crap I’ve been fed so far in the Grove. Her words are colder than if she had slappe
d me across the face, and for the longest time, I wish that’s what she would’ve done. I can understand overstepping my boundaries, but to blatantly shoot me down—to let me know she has the information I desire and to keep it hidden from me—is a new low.
Every time I think the morals of this place have hit rock bottom, they prove me wrong. “I hear you perfectly. You know the truth, but you won’t tell me. It’s statements like that which make me believe the entire fiasco of bringing me here is nothing but a twisted joke for The Council to chuckle at when my back is turned,” I spit, twisting my face in my rage, the desire to maintain a calm, civil attitude out the window. My anger gets a hold of me, sending a flare of telekinesis free which throws her book across the room in the opposite direction of her window.
Which is tragic since I had been aiming for it.
The Sage stays quiet and watches me fidget in my seat, mouth twisted to an odd expression as she waits patiently for my rant to be over. She doesn’t flinch once, not even when my powers fly out of control.
“Why won’t you tell me? What do you have to lose by it?” As my mouth gets drier, my words come out harder and harder to hear, much to my annoyance. I want to scream, to shout, but my body doesn’t choose to cooperate. “Are you gonna use it to control me? To keep me in the dark? T-to use me?” I continue, coughing as the air stirs me, stopping my tantrum before I’m sure it’s even finished. Fern’s words float through my mind once more. The best way The Council strings you along is by purposefully deciding what information you do and don’t know.
“I assure you I mean no ill will toward you. It is simply not my place to tell you,” she says, bowing her head to study the book in her hands to break the eye contact between us.
I stare at my feet, hurt in my eyes, and insult on my tongue when I hear Hyacinth’s voice float through my mind once again.
I may be able to tell you the things she is unwilling to.
Chapter Nineteen
The Poisoning
FOR THE REST of the conversation with The Sage, I nod along but don’t hear a single word she says. From what I can tell, she’s offering me more cryptic phrases with a depth to them that even the top-ranked philosophers would have a difficult time decoding. After her confession, I can’t imagine a universe where I should even care what she has to say. I wonder if The Sage knows I’m tuning her out.
“Courage is what really matters,” she says.
I resist the urge to raise an eyebrow in confusion because I have managed to tune out the beginning part of the lecture. My mind focuses on Hyacinth as I wait for The Sage to stop speaking. Somehow, I manage to ignore the anxiety in the back of my mind that wonders why she would want to help me. What does it matter to her if I find out the truth of who I really am?
The question stays on my mind, and I nearly run from the room when the Sage dismisses me. If The Sage is as good at reading minds as I think, she probably senses what’s gotten into me. I don’t stop to look back at her to find out. As I stumble into the Common Room, I gaze at Hyacinth to find her eyes already on me.
She giggles as I trip over my foot, but I ignore the reaction as I begin to approach her, almost giddy. I feel as if victory is within my grasp. After the trials the past few days of my life have held, part of me fears the acquisition of information is too easy. My anxiety bites at me again, and I begin to worry. What if she is setting me up? What if it’s some sort of test set up by The Sage that I’m failing by approaching her?
I roll my bottom lip between my teeth in contemplation; the temptation is too great to ignore.
Hyacinth offers me a gentle smile. She reads the chaotic stream of my troublesome thoughts, but I don’t try to put up a filter to hide them. She’s already been in my head for days—she knows my demons just as well as I do—and I wonder what the smirk means. Is it a way to comfort me…or to hide something sinister? I try to pry into her mind, but it seems empty now. Does she currently have nothing on her mind or has she carefully wiped it clean?
How does she do it? I wonder as I sit in the chair beside her.
Her violet eyes shine as she looks at me. It’s nice to be able to communicate like this—I prefer it, her thought fills my mind. Anyone can eavesdrop when you talk out loud, but this? It’s peaceful.
I bob my head in agreement before I glance around the room to see if the others have taken notice of us. Crowe is nowhere in sight, and I wonder where he went off to in such a hurry. Through the glass panes in the common room, I see the darkness of the night beyond. Thoughts of my new room cross my mind for a moment, and I have a feeling he knew I would ask about it. I wonder if he’s gone to check for updates.
I tilt my head to the side, pushing away the thought as my gaze turns to Rayna, still content in her knitting. Lynx sits beside the door, elbows resting on his knees. His unfocused eyes stare into space, and I can’t help but wonder what he’s so intently thinking about. I know nothing about him—save the sparse information Crowe has passed my way—but I have the feeling he’s a lot more serious than the rest of The Council.
Hyacinth sets her hand on mine gently, and I jump at the contact as I’m brought back to the moment. A blush spreads across my face, knowing she had asked a question that went in one ear and right out the other.
A-am I the only one that can do this? I ask, scratching at my cheek nervously.
She nods with a small survey of the Common Room. I’ve been on The Council for a long time…I’ve seen members come and go. Each of them with unique gifts of their own. I’m confident when I say that clairvoyance is a rare gift. None of the others have it—at least not from what I could tell. Before you, just me and The Sage could talk like this.
I have no ill will against the girl but her monologue irritates me after The Sage’s cold dismissal. I’m not in the mood to play nice, to make friends—I want answers. I pull my shoulders back, annoyed with the small talk and wonder if Hyacinth can pick up on the feeling. What do you know about me?
Hyacinth’s shoulders tense. Judging from the thoughts in her head, it seems like she hadn’t expected me to be blunt. She had prepared a speech to ease me into this talk. What am I getting myself into? I think but stifle the thought before Hyacinth picks up on it.
A small sigh passes her lips as she glances sideways at me. Bits and pieces—like I know of everyone, really. The biggest misconception people have about mind readers is the thought we see everything. We don’t. Some people are more open than others in conversation and the same is true of their thoughts.
Her words make me feel slightly better. I don’t know if The Sage asked her to pry inside my head or not, but it’s reassuring that I’m not the open book I assumed to be at first. The thought she may not be able to get to everything dear to me brings me a bit of comfort.
Have you ever met someone who’s mind you couldn’t read?
Hyacinth tipped her head in thought. Not that I know of, no.
You can even read UnEquipped minds? I wonder, drawing my eyebrows together.
She nods and I feel her prod the inside of my mind for a minute to the memory of when I had read my mother’s mind back in Ignis. But you already knew that. Are you testing me, Lilith?
I prefer to be called Li.
Hyacinth sighs. Let’s cut to the chase. The Sage is the only one with all the answers. I’ll try to help you anyway I can, but I think it’s best you learn that now to avoid any misunderstandings.
I blink at her and my hope rapidly depletes by the moment. I let go a string of expletives in my mind, carefully concealing them in the depths of my head. A glance at the serene expression on Hyacinth’s face is enough for me to know my thought-cloaking works. The next thought passes through my mind—this one more venomous than the curses uttered a minute before. I wonder if this is her way of picking on me like the bear incident with Crowe and the mind control faux pas with Rayna at the Dedication Ceremony. Do they all have their specific torments for the fresh meat brought to the Grove? Is that the real reason I’ve been rec
ruited—to be their punching bag?
Every day that passes makes me believe it more and more.
You gave me false hope, I state emotionlessly, jutting out my bottom lip.
Hyacinth purses her lips and replies, I’m sorry. I want to help you, really I do. At least more than the others do.
I let her words sink in and glance at Rayna and Lynx. They have no obligation to want to help me—none of them do. Not even my “mentor,” Crowe. I try to pry into their minds, to see if any thoughts of me surface. They don’t think of me, not even Rayna who had made such an adamant appearance in my life during day one. It seems her desire for friendship has passed, and I’m relieved at the thought.
They’ll warm up to you eventually, Hyacinth reassures me, tucking a strand of her flowing blonde hair behind her ear.
I flinch, realizing I had forgotten to cloak my thought. She misunderstood the emotion behind it. I push it away and move onto my next point. How is it you can only know half the story? I demand, trying to keep my anger off my face. You’re clairvoyant, for God’s sake!
You can read minds as well as me apparently. With a little practice, you’ll have a handle on it in no time. Tell me, Miss Demands, have you been able to read The Sage’s mind? She tilts her head and raises her fist to rest the back of her hand against her mouth.
I think of the one fleeting thought she had let slip in the conversation before I went back home. I scrunch my face at the thought. I don’t know if it was an accident or a test to see the extent of my powers. After sorting through my memories, I slowly shake my head. I’m sure The Sage thought plenty of things during our talks—especially during my outbursts—but none of them had reached my mind.
That’s because she puts up barriers—a lock and key system, if you will, that keeps us out if she doesn’t want to be heard. Really, everyone is capable of it, but their systems are much weaker. With a little concentration, we can read anyone’s thoughts—even if they have a barrier. Theirs are like paper compared to the vault of The Sage’s mind.
The Council Page 18