“How’s your training going?” he asks as he comes to rest beside me.
“Uh…good,” I murmur, too shocked by his sudden appearance to think of proper conversation.
He bobs his head as his eyes scan the crowd. “Good, good. Is Crowe here?”
“Where’ve you been?” I demand, ignoring his question.
“Why? Have you missed me?” He raises an eyebrow.
I nod but stare at him to continue.
He smiles and sets his fingers to his ear. I follow the movement to notice a lack of a gem. Not even a red stud from Ignis is there. “They dismissed me…sent me back home to Ignis.”
That’s not what your ear says.
“But why?” I ask, feeling my heart pump harder in my chest. Could it have to do with the information The Sage had told me in confidence? Is it possible Tarj had known something about it…or he was one himself, and The Sage had sent him home as a direct connection to the Elementals? She had been sure to tell me the Elementals didn’t know about her stance—that no one did—but now I’m wondering.
What better way to slip in among the ranks of Elementals then by directly breaking the rules of The Council—such as the earring given to each witch during the Dedication Ceremony.
“I thought you were The Sage’s right hand man.”
“Yeah, well, things change. After recruiting you, she didn’t need me anymore,” Tarj says, narrowing his eyes to slits.
“Tarj…I’m so sorry,” I stutter, holding a hand over my heart. “I didn’t know. Maybe we can talk to her and—”
He raises his hand slowly with a small smirk on his face. “It’s okay, really. Honestly, I wanted to leave. I think she knew that. No matter what I did, I was always the weakest of them. They can do amazing things, and me? I just have a typical Ignis power.”
“That’s not true!” I try to protest.
He continues as if he hadn’t heard me. “I had had my doubts for some time, but it hit me the hardest when you saved me from Iris. I couldn’t even protect myself, let alone anyone else. You deserve that position a Hell of a lot more than I do.”
I don’t know if deserve is the right word for it.
“I’m glad you have no ill-will against me,” I say stiffly, hoping it sounds polite as I fight the urge to snap out my sarcastic thought.
“Of course not.”
“Hey, ready to go?” Crowe’s voice floats from behind me.
I nod and he turns his attention to Tarj as they high-five. “Hey, man. What’s up? Haven’t seen you around lately.”
“Yeah, I’m sure you’ve heard the news,” Tarj says, tipping his head to the side with a passive gleam in his eyes.
“I did, tough break,” Crowe replies.
Both boys avoid looking at me but the tension radiating off them is obvious in the air.
“You’ve been in Ignis…so how’s the Coven been?” I ask Tarj, drawing my eyebrows together.
“Business as usual. Your class seems strong,” Tarj says to me. “Clio’s a great leader; he seems to know just what to say to get his friends motivated. They do group training just about every day. I think they may be the most prepared of all the Covens for battle.”
Clio’s doing Ignis proud, I think, feeling a blush creep across my cheeks at the thought of him. I’m proud he’s doing so well…if only I could say the same for Helena. I bite my lip and look down to the ground with my mind stubbornly focused on Clio. I have the strong urge to see him again.
The last encounter is still fresh in my mind even though it’s been a considerable amount of time. Memories of that night at Fern’s oasis hang in my mind, making me feel jittery inside. I smile at the thought and wonder if he ever thinks of me.
If so, I haven’t heard it.
“It’s been fun catching up, Tarj,” Crowe says with a glance at the sun, “but we’ve got to get going. The Sage is expecting us to be in Ignis by tonight.”
“A mission about the Elementals, I take it?” Tarj asks.
Crowe nods. “Is there any other topic for us to cover?” He rolls his eyes.
You’d think not.
“I’ll walk with you guys. It’ll be like old times,” Tarj offers.
Crowe doesn’t protest, and I don’t either.
I glance back at the rise to see Rayna and her brother. “See you later, Quinn,” I call to him.
He smiles at me over his shoulder but returns to his conversation with Rayna without a word. We turn to leave the Ceremony Grounds, Crowe and Tarj in the lead. I follow behind with heavy feet, wondering what I’ll find back at home. I should be filled with unbridled excitement at the thought of going back—of seeing Helena and Clio again and getting to the bottom of the mystery of my true heritage.
But I’m not.
I’m wary, cautious even.
All I can think about are the loyalties of the people I had grown up with. How many of them are willing to tear each other apart in the name of peace?
Chapter Thirty-Three
The Truth
TARJ AND CROWE walk ahead of me, chattering about various going ons in Ignis in the time since Tarj’s dismissal. From the sounds of it, things have been almost virtually the same since the time I left which strikes me as odd. The rest of the Covens have had noticeable issues…even if they were not blaringly obvious at first.
I think about the possibility of people I had known belonging to the Elementals and that thought successfully loops my mind back to my parents. As I follow behind the pair of boys, I think of home with an excited and uncertain lump in my stomach. It almost feels as if the butterflies summoned by earlier thoughts of Clio are drowning in my stomach acid.
That’s what having feelings gets me.
After everything that’s happened to me since my last visit, I know things won’t be the same—they can’t be. As Thorn had noted, I have power…the power to control them, to take away their freewill if I demand it. I don’t want to have this power. Everyone treats me like royalty as if I’ll send them to the guillotine for so much as sneezing in my direction.
I’m not like that and the wall between me and my friends and family seems unnecessary. Business or not, I’m not better than them, and I resolve to not let them think of me in the sense.
Except that’s not completely within the scope of my control.
Helena had been barely able to stand my presence when I had been newly elected to The Council. Will she even want to see me now that I’m on a mission for them? The knowledge of being The Sage’s apprentice burns in the back of my mind, and I know the answer to that question…I just don’t like it.
And what about my parents…will they really tell me the truth of my origins if I simply command them to do so? I can picture the look on their faces, and I almost crave the interaction after all the pain they’ve caused me.
Simple civility first, Hyacinth scolds.
I frown but block out her “helpful” hints as my mind moves back to the near future. How will my parents react when I confront them with what I now know? Will they finally come clean? Or will they make me bind them to an oath to finally get them to spill their secret?
With the dirt underfoot puffing up into the air, I realize just how thirsty I am, and I hope that in the shuffle of Chastity’s execution and Crowe and my mission, The Council hasn’t forgotten to deliver this month’s supply of water to Ignis.
The frown only deepens as I open that door of thought.
I want to deny what The Sage had told me, to stick to the lawful side of the idea, but it’s growing harder and harder to do. The more I think about it, the more I realize The Sage is right about the treaty and its consequences. The treaty makes the Covens weaker—my travels with Crowe have proved that.
Aens, Ignis, and Mentis face a drought that causes them to have a dependence on The Council for water. Aquais is unable to plant crops and must depend on The Council for food while Alchemy is forced to split from their family and friends to never return for the purpose of confidentiality t
hough it’s a well-known fact that many of them do anyway.
If the treaty were to be abolished, the Covens would be able to fix one another with the valuable information they each hold as well as their extensive range of powers. As much as I’d love for that to be our future, the thought of all the people I had met from each of the Covens coexisting seems too good to be true.
As we reach the sun-parched dirt of Ignis, chills run down my spine as I contemplate seeing everyone again. To my frustration, Crowe and Tarj decrease their pace, and they move in a path different from where I want to go, causing the frown to make a reappearance.
“Where are we going?” I ask, trudging each step as I catch up to them.
“Tarj’s home, for dinner,” Crowe replies with a quick glance in my direction.
“I-is it…may I travel solo for a bit?” I ask. “There’s a few people I’d like to talk to while I’m here.”
Crowe nods before turning back to Tarj.
I let out a sigh of relief. I had been sure that would’ve led to an argument, but I’m glad for the lack of resistance—it’ll save my nerves for when I really need them. The closer I get to my parents’ house, the harder my anxiety bites at me. The last time I had seen them had not been under good circumstances and they’re the type to hold a grudge—just the same as me. Will they even open the door when they see it’s me on the porch?
They have to, I remind myself thinking of what Thorn had told me. No more hiding or lying. This is the moment it’s all boiled down to.
By the time the house comes into view, I feel as if I’ve had a full-blown panic attack and recovered from it—just barely. My hand shakes as I knock, and after a moment of silence, Regina answers.
She doesn’t say a word as she stares at me. Before I even move, she flies across the threshold to pull me into the tightest bear hug of my life. I’m stunned at the reaction. My mother has never been an affectionate person so this display of emotion baffles even me.
“Lilith, honey,” she whispers in my ear, sounding relieved.
“Uh, hi, Mom?” I reply uncertainly as she nearly drags me into the house still wrapped in her arms.
“I was so worried you weren’t going to come back.”
It’s a tempting idea.
I break free from the hold and lick my lips nervously to stare at her. Reading her thoughts, I’m sure she isn’t going to apologize for the stupid fight the last time I had been here and of course I’m not either. I’m sure this conversation will end in another argument—apologies won’t go far anyway so I won’t let myself dwell on it.
Regina stares back at me expectantly, and I can see the question in her eyes. I had spent the entire walk here deciding what I would say in this moment, and now that it’s arrived, I’m stumped. I almost wonder if this would be easier if I was angry.
Despite my aggravation, I force my feelings away to focus on the task at hand.
“Yeah, I got caught up in some things,” I reply finally wondering if Hyacinth’s comment on civility may prove to be the most effective after all.
“Helena told me. The Council! That’s such a great accomplishment, and I’m proud of you.” Her eyes shine as she stares at me, and I can’t remember a time when she regarded me in such a manner.
It’s unsettling.
“Thanks, Mom,” I murmur and the word sticks in my throat this time as I catch myself saying it.
The sparkle in her gaze disappears at my tone. “Is something wrong?”
“Are you…my mother?” I ask in a voice that’s oddly dead of any emotion considering the topic at hand.
Panic dances in her eyes before she shouts over her shoulder, “Howard, get in here!”
My dad runs into the room as if he thinks there’s danger, and I haven’t decided if that’s what it will resort to or not. He apparently doesn’t feel the same because his expression softens as soon as he catches sight of me.
I wish I could say the same for mine.
“Lilith!” he says and comes to a rest beside Regina. He opens his mouth to speak again but it’s not information I find useful—just repeats of Regina’s questions, and I’m in no mood for it.
I lift my hand to stop him, a heavy scowl on my face that causes a matching expression to appear on his. “This isn’t a reunion. I’m here on business,” I state, full authority in my voice now just like Crowe had used when announcing our presence in the other Covens. I sound strong, even to my own ears, and if the moment at hand weren’t so vital, I might’ve taken a moment to pat myself on the back for it.
“B-business? You mean this is related to The Elementals? How?” Regina stutters, tilting her head to the side as her haunted eyes stare at the wall behind me, seemingly glad for the change in conversation from my awkward question a moment prior.
“That’s what I’m hoping to find out.” I pause to tap my finger against my lips and contemplate what to say next. My parents stare at me deadpanned as I drop my hand from my mouth. “My time away from Ignis has taught me some things about myself, about everything, and I have to know—are you my real parents?”
The silence in the room would be overpowering were it not for the sound of the blood pumping in my ears. Even though my voice sounds strong, my heart and mind are still riddled with fear that I’m sure all the animals in the nearby radius can detect.
Regina stares down at her hands while Howard glares at me as if I’ve just openly insulted him. Maybe I have, I’m not sure.
Despite the tension, nobody seems ready to make the first move.
“Well…are you?” I ask, jerking my head backward while the suspicion grows heavier by the second.
“Why would you ask us that question?” Howard demands finally.
“A Healer, Lavina, told me I don’t have powers native to Ignis.”
Howard cocks an eyebrow. “Well, none of the UnEquipped do. Why should you be any different?”
I swallow roughly, trying to keep myself from crying out of frustration and anger. Even with direct questions, my parents still somehow find a way to dance around the issue. “Because I’m not UnEquipped!” I blurt out. “I have powers—I…” I pause to swallow before I finish in a softer tone of voice, “…my powers are native to Mentis. I’m from Mentis.”
Regina turns so pale I worry she’ll faint right in the middle of the kitchen while Howard starts to turn red and waves a dismissive hand at me as if I’m spewing nonsense.
“So you think that means you’re adopted?” he demands.
“It’s the only logical conclusion I can think of,” I reply, folding my arms across my chest. “Unless you care to venture another?”
Silence.
“That’s what I thought. You took me from my real parents. What I need to know is why.”
“T-that’s not true—” Regina stutters, but I lift a hand to stop her, feeling more in charge of the situation each time I’m forced to do so.
“Was it before or after my ‘accident?’” I make sure to emphasize “accident” with air quotes.
“What exactly are you accusing us of?” Howard snaps.
“I’m not accusing you of anything. Funny choice of words, by the way, because only someone who is guilty would immediately turn to that thought,” I say, clenching my hands into fists at my sides.
“We have taken care of you for most of your life. Does it matter if we’re not your real parents?” Regina asks, finally rejoining the conversation with a steady tone of voice.
“It wouldn’t, no. Except lately you haven’t acted like my parents. Throwing me out when my life could’ve been in danger? That was cowardice.”
“We did what we had to do to protect you and ourselves.” Regina sighs.
I stare at her, feeling my mouth run dry, though I somehow manage to keep my face from changing expression. “So you’re admitting it? I’m adopted?”
Howard’s ready to reply when Regina sets a hand on his arm to stop him. It’s obvious from the look in her eyes that I’ve broken through whatever
determination she had to keep me out.
She’s sick of the fighting too.
“Yes. Yes, you are.”
Despite my best attempt to stay strong, tears finally manage to well to the corners of my eyes. “Why did you never tell me?”
“You were better off not knowing,” Howard says.
“W-who are my real parents?” I ask.
“You don’t need to know,” Howard replies, matter-of-fact. “You’ve been our daughter for eighteen years. That’s what counts.”
I curl my lip into a snarl and look between both of them. “I decide what counts, not you. The way I see it, you owe me.” Neither of them reply to that so I continue, “If you won’t tell me yourselves, maybe you’ll answer some questions. My parents are from Mentis?”
Regina nods hesitantly.
“Were they the ones that did this to me?” I ask, my voice only slightly louder than a whisper as I gesture to my bad leg.
“No,” Regina states in a voice just as quiet as mine.
I take in a shaky breath.
“We did it a month after you were given to us.”
“Y-you…but why?” I stammer.
Regina swallows roughly, staring down at the floor.
“Why did you do this to me?” I demand, raising my fist as my eyes dart between my adoptive parents. I can’t decide which one I want to hit more.
“We did what was best.”
That line does it. I’m sent into a nuclear meltdown as I remember The Sage saying the same thing to me after forcing me into their Dedication.
“What was…” I stutter, dumbfounded. “Yeah, you said that damn line already! How could you do this? I-I’m crippled because of you! For the rest of my life. This isn’t the “best” situation for anyone, certainly least of all, me. I may not know who my real parents are, but I guarantee they would disagree with what you’ve done. I’m appreciative of the life you’ve given me, but this is goodbye.”
The Council Page 30