by Box Set
"Okay then. Lunch. Let me make you lunch."
I was getting desperate. "I have class until two. We can do lunch then."
He grinned, a big triumphant smile that lit up his ice blue eyes so they didn't look so cold. "Two it is. Konstanz? Does that work for you?"
She nodded. "I can take a late lunch."
"Perfect. Two o’clock. My place."
"Oh. No, Bryson. That's not a good idea." Go back to Alec's apartment? Was he insane? I couldn't see Alec again. I didn't know if I'd throw myself at his feet or claw his eyes out. It changed hourly.
"Alec works until six or seven. He won't be there, I promise."
Elizabeth smirked, tapping her foot. I got the idea that this simultaneously entertained her and annoyed her all at once. "Okay. Okay, Bryson. I'll be there at two. But please don't let Alec be home."
Chapter 31
Alec
I should have known the second Bryson walked in that something was up. He was whistling. Whistling, for hell's sake. Who whistles? But I didn't want to talk to him. I didn't want to talk to anyone. I'd thrown my phone in the hamper so my mom or Josh or anyone else couldn't call me and raise my stupid hopes that it was Navi. Now I was watching violent movies and relishing every time someone died a horrible death.
Yeah. I was evil.
I don't care.
"Have you been here all day?" he asked, dropping his keys on the coffee table and settling himself in the armchair. Awesome. Apparently he thought we were going to be spending quality time together.
"Nope."
He leaned his elbows on his knees and studied me, an annoying grin on his face, like a Cheshire cat just waiting for me to ask him what he'd gotten into. I didn't want to. After several seconds of ignoring him, he said, "What'd you do?"
I stared harder at the TV. "It's a Tuesday, Bryson. I went to work."
He sat back, arms behind his head. "You went to work, really? How do you get anything done with that?" He motioned with his foot toward the huge cast on my right hand.
I'd been put on light duty, which meant talking to people and running errands. It sucked. But I wasn't going to tell him that. "I managed."
Several more seconds of that obnoxious grin. "Seriously, Bryson, what do you want?" I finally paused the movie and turned to him. Anything to get him to go away.
"Nothing. Just wondering how you are. Oh," He got up and went to the kitchen, making some weird herbal tea that made our whole house smell like a tanning salon. "I saw Navi today."
I felt like I'd been hit with a wrecking ball. My entire body tensed, the blood freezing in my veins. At the mention of her name.
I was a mess.
"How was she?" I asked, feigning disinterest while I hung on his every word. I didn't know what I hoped he would say. That she was as miserable as me? But there was a better man inside me that hoped she was okay. That she wasn't hurting. That she would talk to me and we could work this out.
"She’s okay. Hasn’t broken anything yet, so I guess she’s better than you…" His voice trailed off, chuckling.
I take it back. I didn't want her to be happy. The better man inside died right then and all I wanted was for her to be as miserable as I was.
"We went to see the Column. It was beautiful."
"You've been there before." My tone was distinctly accusing, although I wasn’t entirely sure why. "I went with you when you first moved here, remember?"
"That was a year ago, Alec." He leaned against the counter and frowned at me like I was an annoying child. "I can't remember that far back and besides, she took the time to explain each mural. You didn't." He gave me a lopsided smile.
I paced toward him, enjoying that he was only 5'10" and I was 6'2.
He raised his hands. "Chill out, Alec. Konstanz was there, too. It was completely platonic. Then we were going to go to the beach, but... "
The one thing saving me in the lifetime of nightmares I'd had of Navi dying in front of me was that she was on a beach, and Navi did not go near the ocean. Not for anything. Especially not for Bryson. "Navi hates the beach."
"Yeah. I was going to say that. So we got ice cream and then I took them home. See? Nothing to worry about, Alec. I’m just… you have Josh and your alcohol. You don’t need me, but maybe she does."
No, I didn’t need him. But why would she? She had a houseful of girls to help her cope. I grabbed my keys off the table and stormed out. This time, when I drove my truck to her house, I wasn’t going to leave until I talked to her.
Chapter 32
"What are you doing here?" Konstanz eyed me like I'd just crawled out of the sewer, the door opened only wide enough that she could peek out and snarl at me.
"I need to talk to Navi, K."
"Don't ‘K’ me, Alec. We're done being friends."
Ah, so Navi had told them everything. "Okay. Sorry. Konstanz, I need to talk to her. Please."
She must have heard the desperation in my voice, despite my best efforts to hide it. She sighed and opened the door wider. "You don't get to talk to her, Alec. Not again. Not ever."
"Konstanz, I just need to hear her—" voice "—explanation. I didn't give her a chance. It was wrong."
"You called her a whore."
"I didn't mean to. I was hurt. Please, Konstanz. Just let me talk to her."
"Why, Alec? You wouldn't give her a chance to explain before. Why do you think you deserve her time now?" She crossed her arms over her chest and glared at me, her normally friendly eyes shooting daggers laced with poison and followed by big, teethy fish.
"I don't. But I need it. I need to talk to her." My voice cracked. Holy hell, could I get any more pathetic?
"Alec, if you felt for her even half what she feels for you, you wouldn't be jumping to the most horrible conclusion every chance you get. I stood by and did nothing before. I failed her because I believed you. I'm not going to let you hurt her again."
I ran a hand over my face, peering over her shoulder, hoping to see Navi in the background. But the apartment was dark except for a light coming from the hallway. If Navi was here, she wasn't coming out. "I already hurt her, Konstanz. I'm trying to make it better."
"Just leave her alone, Alec. That's how you can make it better."
I hung my head, my good hand clenching and unclenching helplessly at my side. "I can't leave her alone."
I could feel her staring at me, but I didn't know what else to say to convince her.
"What happened to your hand?"
I blinked and looked up. Was that concern I heard in her voice? "I smashed it at work yesterday. Then I got really drunk. Then Josh dragged me to the hospital. It was a great day."
Her sea-green eyes narrowed at me. "You... you went to the hospital last night?"
"Yeah." This wasn't the conversation I was expecting at all, and I had no idea where she was going with it. "Want to see my doctors orders or whatever they're called?"
Slowly, she shook her head. I wasn't sure what I'd said that changed her, but the anger dimmed just a bit. "Navi isn't here. She's working. Not being a whore."
I closed my eyes against the pain. "I know, Konstanz."
"She won't be back until morning. She had an important meeting tonight, and they usually take hours."
Defeated, I felt every ounce of energy desert me. "Okay," I mumbled. I turned and started for my truck.
"Alec?" She sounded hesitant, like she really didn't want to say what she was about to say.
Which meant I really didn't want to hear it. But I looked back over my shoulder anyway. She was right behind me. She laid a gentle hand on my arm and bit her lip. "I know it's hard." She nodded. "I know how bad it hurts. But she's been through enough. Please, if you can find the strength, stay away from her. Or if you can't do that, if you can't stay away from her, then be her friend. But this," she waved her hand through the air like it explained what this was, "this will kill you both."
Chapter 33
The second time I got drunk in two days, I mad
e sure not to mix it with pain pills. "Dude, slow down. You're gonna end up in the hospital again." Josh attempted to steer me away from the bar, but I shoved him out of the way.
"I don't care." I wanted pain. I wanted the oblivion that alcohol could bring. Get her outta my head. Get her out of my heart. I knew I'd hurt her. But I honestly hadn't thought it was over. Not really. I didn't even believe she'd been cheating, if you could call it cheating when we'd only been together for two days. The look in her eyes when I walked away haunted me, and it told me everything I needed to know.
I just wish I would have realized it sooner.
But Konstanz was right. The relationship between Navi and I was too intense. It was either head over heels or absolute hate. It could destroy us both. I was okay with it destroying me. But I wasn't okay with it destroying her.
"I gotta move outta the state." My words were already slurred.
"Your mom won't let that happen. Neither will Jack."
Jack. He'd be real proud of his big brother right now, wouldn't he? I laid my head on the bar counter and groaned. It was hard and sticky and cool. "How much has he had?" the bartender asked. Same girl as last night.
"Too much. I'm taking him home."
"Is he okay?"
"No. Broke his hand. Broke his heart." I could picture Josh shrugging, but I wasn't raising my head to see it play out for real.
"Oh," she cooed. "How could anyone break his heart when it's attached to a body like that?"
I scowled, which was hard with my eyebrows pushed against the dirty bar. Was she hitting on me?
"She's an ice queen. You wanna take him home and put his heart back together for him?"
What the hell was going on? I forced myself up, rubbing my forehead and glaring at them both.
She smiled, red painted lips splitting into a seductive smirk. She was hot, with black pin-up curls and a low-cut tank top that left absolutely nothing to the imagination.
And she wasn't Navi.
"No thanks." I stood up, nearly toppling my bar stool. Her smile faded, replaced by hurt. Crap. Now I was going to have to find a new bar, and I planned on spending a lot of time in one for the next while. Until I forgot that demon angel for good. "It's not you. I can't do this anymore." I tried to give her an apologetic smile, but it didn't turn out so well.
"You know where to find me." She wiped the counter and left to get someone else's drink.
"You're an idiot," Josh said as he heaved me to my feet. "I hand you a hot girl who wants to take you home—"
"I don't want it, Josh. I'm done." I shook my head, which was a mistake. The room spun and my stomach heaved. "Shit."
"Okay." Josh pushed me forward, out the door and into the fresh air. "Time to get you home. No more alcohol for you."
My stomach, as I lost everything in it all over the parking lot, agreed with him.
Chapter 34
Navi
Meeting Death wasn't an easy task. For one thing, dude is scary. He's got the glowing red eyes, the long skeletal hands emerging from the folds of his robes, and... nothing else. Well, he had a skeletal face, but I only got to see that when he pulled his hood back. That, however, was nothing compared to actually getting to him. It's hard getting through the gates of hell. Only an Agent can do it and return, unless she escorts someone out. So I went in with Elizabeth. The rest of my army kept watch on the shores.
So the asuwangs emerge from the ocean through a rocky gate that was almost impossible to scale unless you had super powers (And I totally have super powers. As long as the moon is up). Well, on the other side of that gate is a cave. And at the back of the cave is what looks like a plain, ordinary wall, but when I raise Kali and Golly and push their blades into the soft rock, the wall shimmers and crumbles, and the gate to hell is opened.
It wasn't hot, as one might expect, although the screams of the damned could be heard in the distance. It was dark, with eternal flames lighting torches every twenty-five feet or so. Elizabeth trembled beside me, as she always did, because this path did not bring back happy memories for her. Usually we walked in silence, but this time, Elizabeth had something on her mind. I could tell because she fidgeted, and Elizabeth never fidgets.
"What's up, Buttercup?" I asked as we navigated our way over the petrified lava. Really, I could see the beauty of this place. Black, roiling waves of stone with hidden pockets, fragile and jagged and dangerous all at once. To fall here would mean stitches at the very least. Elizabeth looked at me and then away, biting her translucent lip. "Elizabeth?"
Sudden fear hit me. What if she was ready to move on? It was her right—she'd earned it. But she'd been with me so long I wasn't sure how to exist without her. Besides that, she was my friend. She might not know it, but she was. I'd adopted her as my own and I wasn't sure if I could handle the pain of her leaving.
Especially not right now. I wasn't particularly my strongest at that exact moment in time.
"You've never asked why I was on my way to eternal damnation."
I froze mid-step, nearly falling over. That wasn't what I'd been expecting at all. "No. I haven't." A very eloquent response.
"Why not?" She wouldn't look at me. I could feel the hairs standing up on the back of my neck and a fear I'd never had with Elizabeth rose from my stomach.
"It's your choice to tell me." I wasn't afraid of her. How could I be afraid of her—she's my Elizabeth in the colonial dress with the neat bun and the fierce battle ax. But still... being this close to hell can do crazy things to a person.
Er, ghost.
"I choose to tell you now."
I looked wildly around the cavern. We were maybe four minutes from Death's door. Not a lot of time to have a heart to heart. But this seemed important to her. "Okay. Shoot."
"In life, I loved two men."
I waited for her to continue, but she didn't. So then I spent several seconds listening to my soft leather boots make padding noises across the lava and pondered her words. "Umm. Elizabeth, most people love more than one person in their life."
She passed a ghostly hand over my arm. "You don't understand. I was married to one man. I loved him. Very much. But I also loved another man at the same time."
"Oh. So you... you had an affair?" This was an incredibly awkward conversation. Plus, I hadn't thought having an affair was a damnable sin, but I wasn't all that up-to-date on what constituted a trip to hell.
"No. I did not." Her voice was soft, sad. "I've seen the way you love Alec, Navi. That was the way I loved Wyatt. But I married someone else. And no matter how much I loved him, I could never love him enough to forget Wyatt."
I paused, turning my full attention on her. "So you're saying that if I don't find a way to get over Alec, I'll go to hell?"
She shook her head. "If you don't find a way to forget your Alec, you're already in hell. Or, you could tell him the truth and give your heart peace."
It was true. His constant presence in my head over the years, in my heart, was agonizing. Having him there but never being able to touch him or talk to him or even see him. There were even times over the last four years that I imagined he was a myth. Not real. Not real.
"I can't tell him the truth, Elizabeth. It will open his eyes. The demons will target him. I can't fight them and keep the city safe if they're constantly sending hunters after him. I love him enough to give him that. Besides, I also hate him. Right now, I hate him a lot."
She smiled gently. I bet, when she'd died, she'd been in her early thirties. She was still beautiful, despite the sadness in her gray eyes. "Hate is passionate. Sometimes it is easier to hate the things we love. I took my own life because of my guilt, and I was not allowed into heaven. I spent a lifetime not being true to my own heart and soul—not letting go of one of them and fully loving the other. Perhaps that is the worst sin of all."
And with that, we arrived at Death's door.
His house, ironically, was an adorable cottage with pretty flowers and wind chimes in the front. I got the impression
that perhaps, it might just be possible, that Death didn't really enjoy all the darkness and gloom that came with being Death.
I knocked, waiting to hear footfalls from the other side, even though I knew Death didn't walk. It was habit. Old habits die hard, you know.
The door swung open and Death's red, glowing eyes greeted me. I swallowed my customary shriek, because asuwangs had red, glowing eyes and wanting to shriek was pure reflex. But Death was a nice guy, despite his terrifying appearance. "Navi. You are prompt, as usual."
"Hi. Do you want my report first, or shall we meet the new recruits?"
"You can sheath Golly and Kali now." I imagined him raising an eyebrow at me, but then, I couldn't remember him having eyebrows. Hurriedly, I put them away, immediately missing the comfort of my swords in my hands.
"Let's have your reports first. I will have my pets round up the recruits." He whistled, an ear-splitting, skull-shattering ouch that brought the hounds of hell bounding out of the manicured back lawns. They were gigantic black dogs with flames dripping from their jaws, but they leaped around like puppies.
"Down! Down boy!" I yelled when one, whose name I could never remember, leaped toward me, spiked tail wagging in excitement. I danced out of the way, facing eminent death at the mouth of an overly enthusiastic dog.
Never mind that he was all fire and spikes and poison.
"Garmr. Down," Death snapped. Garmr, yes. That was it. Garmr dropped back, head down. I would have petted him if his fur wouldn't have sent waves of toxins through my blood. Instead I just murmured, "Poor puppy."
Death gave me an exasperated glare before he turned to Garmr and his sister—who also had a name I couldn't remember. "Bring me the lost souls."
The dogs bounded off, racing through a haze of smoke and fire, and disappeared behind a wave of lava. "Shall we?" Death stepped back politely and waved us inside.
His house was something out of a painting. Lots of pastels, lots of flowers. Lots of tea settings and comfortable furniture. "What have you to report?"