Emotion clogged Tucker’s throat. He nodded.
Abe gave a sad smile. They were halfway across the pasture when Morgan and Chet emerged from the woods leading their horses.
Tucker hadn’t ever been so glad to see his brother and his friend. With their help they’d get back to Suzie sooner.
And she and her son would finally have the fresh start she’d been praying for.
And he would hang in the background and give them room.
* * *
The sun was barely up, but everyone was saddled and ready to ride. Tucker’s dad hadn’t slept all night, either. Neither had Morgan and Chet, who’d headed out as soon as the lightning had eased up and the rain had turned to a drizzle. To ease the wait, they’d told stories of life on the ranch, and as worried as she was, Suzie had found herself laughing at the antics of the kids. With all of the activities that went on, there was never a shortage of stories. But now, she was ready to find Abe. And Tucker.
She was about to climb into the saddle when she heard one of the boys yell.
“They’re coming!”
Suzie spun around to see Tucker and Abe riding from the woods with Morgan and Chet.
Relief and love raced through her in a riot of happy emotion.
Rushing forward, she met Abe as he eased from his saddle, hopped on one foot and wrapped his arms around her.
“I’m sorry, Mom,” he said, hugging her as tightly as she hugged him. It was the first real hug she’d had from him in months. Her knees almost buckled from the shock and joy of it.
With her heart full to overflowing, she held him close and met Tucker’s eyes. “Thank you,” she mouthed silently, and then to her son she said, “Don’t worry about any of that, Abe. I love you and am so glad you are okay.”
“And you, too, Mom. I didn’t even tell you I was glad you were safe after Tucker pulled you from the river.”
She assured him she’d known he was, despite what had transpired afterward.
The boys had held back, giving them time for their reunion, but now they rushed forward and encircled them, welcoming Abe and asking what had happened.
She wanted to know as much as they did. It was obvious something had happened to his ankle but he seemed okay. Giving him a last squeeze around the waist, she backed away and let him talk to his friends.
“Tucker caught up to me after the storm hit. It was bad, I sprained my ankle, too. But he knew of a cave and we made it there and spent the night.”
“Sweet!” Wes said. “That’s my cave. It’s a good thinkin’ place.”
“Yeah, that’s for sure,” Abe agreed. “But me and Tucker mostly talked and watched the fire while the rain and the lightning went crazy. What’d y’all do?”
“We had chili,” B.J. exclaimed. “And it was good, good, gooood!”
Tucker moved to stand beside her, keeping a distance between them that was obvious.
“Thank you for bringing him back to me.” She wanted to reach out and touch him, but she didn’t. He was holding himself at a distance, anyway—could she blame him? No.
“I think Abe is going to be all right. Talk to him, I believe he may have turned a corner toward healing.”
“I’ll do that. Are you all right?”
“Don’t worry about me.” He didn’t wait for her to reply. Instead, he went back to his horse and stepped into the stirrup, threw his leg over the saddle and looked down at the boys. “Okay, boys, we started this job and we’re going to finish it. We’ve got cattle to round up.”
That was all it took for the boys to head to their horses. Abe was grinning as he limped to his.
“Abe, you need to have that ankle looked at,” Tucker warned.
“It’s better. Sitting in a saddle’s not going to hurt it,” he said, using his good foot to saddle up. “Let’s roll,” he said, looking every bit the born-and-bred cowboy.
Suzie was so proud of him.
They’d talk later.
There were some important issues that had to be discussed.
“Come on, Ms. Suzie, it’s roundup time. Ain’t you comin’?” B.J. called, riding over to her. She had to smile at the little boy.
“B.J., I wouldn’t miss it for the world. Goodness, you look like you grew a foot last night. I was looking down at you and now I’m looking up. What happened?”
He giggled. “I got on my horse.”
“Oh, is that what you did? Well, hang on and I’ll get on mine, and we can round them up together, how’s that?”
He grinned. “Awesome!”
She caught Abe smiling at her from his horse, and it felt as though the sun had just come out after the terrible storm.
What, she wondered, had gone on between Tucker and Abe out there in the midst of that storm?
Whatever it was, it was an answer to her prayers, and she couldn’t wait until there was a private moment where she and Tucker could talk.
About a lot of things.
Chapter Eighteen
Edwina hustled from the Spotted Cow’s kitchen, plopped two plates of food in front of a pair of cowboys in the corner, then headed Tucker’s way. The sharp-witted waitress took one look at him, poked her pencil behind her ear and grimaced. “Sheriff, you look like roadkill—awful handsome roadkill, but awful bein’ the key word here. What happened to you?” She held up her hands. “No, wait. You need some strong coffee first, and then you can explain why you have marched in here and completely wrecked my belief that you always look magazine-perfect.”
He wasn’t going to argue—he needed strong coffee and some of Ms. Jo’s coconut pie. And he was proud to see that he didn’t even have to ask for it. After loading up the horses in the trailers that the hands had waiting for them at the end of the roundup, Tucker had watched all of the boys and Abe pile into trucks and head back to the ranch.
There had been no time for a private talk with Suzie. He’d just been able to ask if she was all right after her fall in the river. Since there hadn’t been much time before he’d gone after Abe, he had simply needed to make sure she was okay. She’d kept her distance. He’d longed to wrap his arms around her, but he didn’t want to upset Abe or Suzie. Had she just reacted to his kiss earlier because she’d been terrified?
That question had been eating at him.
Edwina left him at the table and returned with a pot of coffee in one hand and a double portion of pie in the other. “Here,” she said, plopping the pie in front of him then carefully filling his cup full of dark coffee. “You need sugar, so eat up. And then tell me what has happened to you.”
The coffee burned a trail down his throat and the sweet, creamy pie acted like an IV of glucose as it rushed into his bloodstream. He’d taken a swig of the coffee and downed a forkful of pie before he realized Edwina was still watching him, her arms crossed and the half-full pot of coffee dangling from one hand.
Ms. Jo finished her conversation at a nearby table and came over to stand beside Edwina. Her bright eyes behind her round-rimmed glasses pierced deep as she, too, studied him.
“Somethin’s up, Ms. Jo,” Edwina drawled, cocking her head toward him. “Tucker’s inhalin’ your pie like you don’t have fifteen more back there he can have if he really wanted them.”
“And he looks worn out, to boot. Take care of the customers, Ed. I’ve got this.”
“Sure thing, boss. You just give me the nod on whatever you need. And fill me in later.”
Tucker took another bite of pie. Why not? The two of them obviously didn’t need him in the conversation they were indulging in at his expense. And he needed the pie, the comfort and the sugar it provided.
Ms. Jo slid into the booth across from him. “That’s your mama’s recipe, and anytime you’re feeling low, you eat that pie like a man dying of thirst.”
He swallowed, savoring the pie, remembering how his mother used to make this for him whenever he asked. He took another swig of coffee. “I guess even a grown man needs a little reminder sometimes of the way things used to be.”
Ms. Jo laid her hand over his and squeezed. “We all do. What’s got you looking so down? I noticed at the wedding the other night that you looked distracted.” She dipped her chin, and peeked at him over the rim of her glasses. “I kind of suspected it had a little something to do with Suzie.”
Was he that easy to read? He never had been before. As a marine he’d needed to sometimes live behind a shield, but maybe there wasn’t any way to hide an emotion as strong as love.
“You see too much, for a little short woman.”
One brow hiked. “This little short woman has eyes just like everyone else. Believe me, it wasn’t just me who saw you only had eyes for our newest resident. Her business is doing good. Except yesterday she put Drewbaker and Chili in charge of the cash register, so I’m thinking she might have a screw or two loose upstairs.” She chuckled. “They had customers backed out the door, it was so full.”
He laughed. “Yeah, she was in a bad way and needed to go on the roundup with us. Those two volunteered and she felt spending time with Abe was worth it.”
“And with you, maybe?”
He sighed. “Maybe, but it’s complicated.”
“Love always is.”
He dug his fork into the last bite of pie, not willing to admit that to anyone yet. “Ms. Jo, that was wonderful. Can I ask you something?”
“Anything.”
“You remember how I was after mom died?”
She looked sad and thoughtful. “Yep. You looked like you carried the weight of the world on your shoulders. It took a long time for you to accept that she was gone and not coming back. You remember that, don’t you?”
He toyed with his coffee. “Some of it. A lot of those first months are fuzzy for me.”
“Grief does things like that. Why do you ask?”
“Abe, he’s better. But I’m not sure he’s ever going to completely get over his dad’s death.”
Ms. Jo shook her head. “Death makes a mark on a soul. But love is patient and kind and perseveres. It never gives up. Do you know what I’m saying? I know whatever is going on between you, Suzie and Abe is complicated. But God can work even complicated out according to His plan. And His plan is always perfect.”
If he loved Suzie, he’d have to be patient. And if he loved her, he’d have to be willing to accept what was best for her...even if that meant he wouldn’t be in her life.
“Tucker, I know you’ve had a lot on your plate since returning home. Gordon’s death was hard on this entire community. We loved that young man. And for him to give his life for his country—and for you—it just has been hard. But we see that pain that runs through you as you take care of all of our safety, protecting us in our little world. You need to find happiness like your brothers have. And my instincts tell me Suzie means more to you than you want to admit.”
Oh, he knew exactly how much she meant to him. It just wasn’t that simple. He downed another long draw of coffee and glanced toward the exit, looking for an escape route.
Ms. Jo’s knowing smile unfurled. “That’s what I thought. Sometimes God’s plan for our lives comes from the worst of circumstances. Beauty from ashes, the Bible says.”
“And some things are never meant to be.”
Her eyes flashed. “You ever see a flower growing out of a tiny crack in the cement or a sliver of dirt in a rock face? It’s against all odds that that beauty would rise up out of that hard, unforgiving rock, but it does. It fights the odds and flourishes. If God’s in this, then you fight for it. Don’t give up on it before it’s even had time to root.”
He’d come for the pie, but also this. Ms. Jo’s encouragement always cut to the quick of the matter. But this time he just wasn’t sure if fighting for what he wanted was the right thing to do.
* * *
By Wednesday, Suzie and Abe were moved into the apartment over the shop. Everyone at the ranch had acted as if they were moving to Alaska. It was touching, really, and she hoped it made Abe feel good that everyone was sad to see him move from the ranch property. Suzie had been so relieved when Nana and Randolph assured her they understood.
The place still needed painting, but by the time she’d cleaned, thrown out all the stored junk, laid carpets on the floors, placed photos and paintings on the walls, arranged her furniture with help from Tony, Abe and Caleb. And Jake had helped, too. Now the apartment had a homey feel to it and a coziness that helped her feel relaxed. There was nothing like a place of your own to call home. No matter how much she had enjoyed Nana’s hospitality, it hadn’t been home. No wonder Abe had felt a little displaced. Now they were surrounded by familiar things, their things, family items that spoke to their hearts.
They’d also made huge steps toward healing in the past week. And they were building on that.
She’d taken Abe to school then picked him up after work all week and they’d come home together. She’d fixed them supper, and they’d eaten together at the kitchen table that they’d owned since Abe was a baby. There was familiarity in their days. And Abe seemed content.
Everything was almost perfect, as though life was actually going to be good again. Except Suzie realized very quickly that she missed Tucker.
She hadn’t seen him since the day he’d returned Abe to her. He hadn’t stopped by the shop, and she hadn’t been at the ranch as much, so she hadn’t seen him there.
She thought a few times about going to his office, but she hadn’t.
“Mom,” Abe said on Friday evening, as they drove home from seeing Dr. Livingston. “Are you happy?”
“Yes,” she said, glancing at him. “Is something wrong? I thought you said everything was better. And you said that you talked to Dr. Livingston and it helped.”
His eyes were deeply serious. “I’m doing good, Mom. I asked about you. The doc, she asked me how I thought you were doing, and I told her good. She asked me if you were seeing anyone, if you’d moved forward, and how I would feel about that.”
Suzie’s pulse jerked and she automatically pressed the brake. They were on the outskirts of town and she slowed as she glanced at him. “What did you tell her?”
He frowned. “I told her you were fine. That you were happy.”
“I am.” Tucker’s smile filled her mind, she missed him so.
“Are you sure?” Glancing at him again, she realized he looked worried.
“What’s the matter, Abe?”
“Nothing,” he said, and stared out the window.
She wasn’t sure what to make of his questions. She knew in her heart that she’d fallen in love with Tucker McDermott. It had happened watching him care for her son’s welfare and try so hard to make up for the loss of Gordon. She just didn’t know what to do about it.
She didn’t know how Abe would feel about it. And suddenly he was asking these questions.
“I’m a young woman, though, Abe. I probably will remarry one day. But I don’t want you to worry about that now. I want you to be comfortable with it. My main concern right now is that you grow and adjust to our life as it is now. I don’t want you to worry about anything. Okay?”
“Okay, and, Mom, I’m okay. You can stop worrying about me. I promise.”
Her heart swelled and thankfulness filled her to the brim. Thank You, Lord. She smiled.
Her GED test was in four weeks. She and Jolie had come up with a study plan that worked for her. She was reminded every time she sat down with her books that she might have never thought to do this until Tucker had suggested it to her.
He’d been so encouraging in all aspects of her move here and in her life going forward. And now he’d helped Abe profoun
dly. The night after they’d stayed in the cave together, Abe told her that Tucker had talked to him about the anger that he’d felt when he lost his mother when he was around Abe’s age.
What touched her was that Abe had said he was trying to live a life that would make his dad proud.
There was no better tribute than that. And Tucker was responsible for this turnaround.
Suzie couldn’t get him off her mind, and she wondered why he hadn’t come by to see them. He’d just seemed to disappear after the roundup.
Of course, she knew he was down the street at the office, but...she knew he knew she’d moved into the apartment in town. If he wanted to see her, wouldn’t he come by?
* * *
On Saturday morning she woke early. She had decided she needed to talk to Tucker, but first she had to work on flowers for a small wedding. She was unlocking the front of her shop when Tucker passed by in his SUV.
Her heart began pounding at just seeing him. She waved and he pulled into an empty parking space. His elbow rested in the open window. “Morning, ma’am. You’re out bright and early.”
He was so handsome, she could hardly breathe looking at him. Her fingers itched to cup his rugged jaw, and she realized how much she wanted to feel his arms around her and his lips on hers.
She’d been concentrating on Abe all week, but now... “I have a wedding today. They need the flowers before lunch, so I wanted to make certain they were done. You’re out and about early, too.”
“Yeah, I need some bodies to fill up the jail cells so I thought I’d get an early start. Have them full by noon.”
She laughed, and his eyes twinkled.
“It sounds like we’ll both be finished by lunch,” he said.
She took a step toward him, moving to the edge of the sidewalk. “I—I’ve missed you, Tucker. I was hoping to talk to you.”
He looked away, studying some distant point at the end of the street. “I’ve been busy.”
“Oh, sure, I see.”
“How’s Abe? Jolie told me he’s been participating in school all week. And Pepper told me that he’s been coming in and cleaning stalls, even though his two weeks of duty ended on Thursday.”
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