‘Excuse me, Frau Lenore, you seem to be blaming me.’
‘I am not blaming you in the least, not in the least! You’re quite another matter; you are, like all Russians, a military man …’
‘Excuse me, I’m not at all …’
‘You’re a foreigner, a visitor, and I’m grateful to you,’ Frau Lenore went on, not heeding Sanin. She sighed, waved her hands, unwound her handkerchief again, and blew her nose. Simply from the way in which her distress expressed itself, it could be seen that she had not been born under a northern sky.
‘And how is Herr Klüber to look after his shop, if he is to fight with his customers? It’s utterly inconsistent! And now I am to send him away! But what are we going to live on? At one time we were the only people that made angel cakes, and nougat of pistachio nuts, and we had plenty of customers; but now all the shops make angel cakes! Only consider; even without this, they’ll talk in the town about your duel … it’s impossible to keep it secret. And all of a sudden, the marriage broken off! It will be a scandal, a scandal! Gemma is a splendid girl, she loves me; but she’s an obstinate republican, she doesn’t care for the opinion of others. You’re the only person that can persuade her!’
Sanin was more amazed than ever. ‘I, Frau Lenore?’
‘Yes, you alone … you alone. That’s why I have come to you; I could not think of anything else to do! You are so clever, so good! You have fought in her defence. She will trust you! She is bound to trust you — why, you have risked your life on her account! You will make her understand, for I can do nothing more; you make her understand that she will bring ruin on herself and all of us. You saved my son — save my daughter too! God Himself sent you here … I am ready on my knees to beseech you….’ And Frau Lenore half rose from her seat as though about to fall at Sanin’s feet…. He restrained her.
‘Frau Lenore! For mercy’s sake! What are you doing?’
She clutched his hand impulsively. ‘You promise …’
‘Frau Lenore, think a moment; what right have I …’
‘You promise? You don’t want me to die here at once before your eyes?’
Sanin was utterly nonplussed. It was the first time in his life he had had to deal with any one of ardent Italian blood.
‘I will do whatever you like,’ he cried. ‘I will talk to Fräulein
Gemma….’
Frau Lenore uttered a cry of delight.
‘Only I really can’t say what result will come of it …’
‘Ah, don’t go back, don’t go back from your words!’ cried Frau Lenore in an imploring voice; ‘you have already consented! The result is certain to be excellent. Any way, I can do nothing more! She won’t listen to me!’
‘Has she so positively stated her disinclination to marry Herr
Klüber?’ Sanin inquired after a short silence.
‘As if she’d cut the knot with a knife! She’s her father all over,
Giovanni Battista! Wilful girl!’
‘Wilful? Is she!’ … Sanin said slowly. ‘Yes … yes … but she’s an angel too. She will mind you. Are you coming soon? Oh, my dear Russian friend!’ Frau Lenore rose impulsively from her chair, and as impulsively clasped the head of Sanin, who was sitting opposite her. ‘Accept a mother’s blessing — and give me some water!’
Sanin brought Signora Roselli a glass of water, gave her his word of honour that he would come directly, escorted her down the stairs to the street, and when he was back in his own room, positively threw up his arms and opened his eyes wide in his amazement.
‘Well,’ he thought, ‘well, now life is going round in a whirl! And it’s whirling so that I’m giddy.’ He did not attempt to look within, to realise what was going on in himself: it was all uproar and confusion, and that was all he knew! What a day it had been! His lips murmured unconsciously: ‘Wilful … her mother says … and I have got to advise her … her! And advise her what?’
Sanin, really, was giddy, and above all this whirl of shifting sensations and impressions and unfinished thoughts, there floated continually the image of Gemma, the image so ineffaceably impressed on his memory on that hot night, quivering with electricity, in that dark window, in the light of the swarming stars!
XXIV
With hesitating footsteps Sanin approached the house of Signora Roselli. His heart was beating violently; he distinctly felt, and even heard it thumping at his side. What should he say to Gemma, how should he begin? He went into the house, not through the shop, but by the back entrance. In the little outer room he met Frau Lenore. She was both relieved and scared at the sight of him.
‘I have been expecting you,’ she said in a whisper, squeezing his hand with each of hers in turn. ‘Go into the garden; she is there. Mind, I rely on you!’
Sanin went into the garden.
Gemma was sitting on a garden - seat near the path, she was sorting a big basket full of cherries, picking out the ripest, and putting them on a dish. The sun was low — it was seven o’clock in the evening — and there was more purple than gold in the full slanting light with which it flooded the whole of Signora Roselli’s little garden. From time to time, faintly audibly, and as it were deliberately, the leaves rustled, and belated bees buzzed abruptly as they flew from one flower to the next, and somewhere a dove was cooing a never - changing, unceasing note. Gemma had on the same round hat in which she had driven to Soden. She peeped at Sanin from under its turned - down brim, and again bent over the basket.
Sanin went up to Gemma, unconsciously making each step shorter, and … and … and nothing better could he find to say to her than to ask why was she sorting the cherries.
Gemma was in no haste to reply.
‘These are riper,’ she observed at last, ‘they will go into jam, and those are for tarts. You know the round sweet tarts we sell?’
As she said those words, Gemma bent her head still lower, and her right hand with two cherries in her fingers was suspended in the air between the basket and the dish.
‘May I sit by you?’ asked Sanin.
‘Yes.’ Gemma moved a little along on the seat. Sanin placed himself beside her. ‘How am I to begin?’ was his thought. But Gemma got him out of his difficulty.
‘You have fought a duel to - day,’ she began eagerly, and she turned all her lovely, bashfully flushing face to him — and what depths of gratitude were shining in those eyes! ‘And you are so calm! I suppose for you danger does not exist?’
‘Oh, come! I have not been exposed to any danger. Everything went off very satisfactorily and inoffensively.’
Gemma passed her finger to right and to left before her eyes … Also an Italian gesture. ‘No! no! don’t say that! You won’t deceive me! Pantaleone has told me everything!’
‘He’s a trustworthy witness! Did he compare me to the statue of the commander?’
‘His expressions may be ridiculous, but his feeling is not ridiculous, nor is what you have done to - day. And all that on my account … for me … I shall never forget it.’
‘I assure you, Fräulein Gemma …’
‘I shall never forget it,’ she said deliberately; once more she looked intently at him, and turned away.
He could now see her delicate pure profile, and it seemed to him that he had never seen anything like it, and had never known anything like what he was feeling at that instant. His soul was on fire.
‘And my promise!’ flashed in among his thoughts.
‘Fräulein Gemma …’ he began after a momentary hesitation.
‘What?’
She did not turn to him, she went on sorting the cherries, carefully taking them by their stalks with her finger - tips, assiduously picking out the leaves…. But what a confiding caress could be heard in that one word,
‘What?’
‘Has your mother said nothing to you … about …’
‘About?’
‘About me?’
Gemma suddenly flung back into the basket the cherries she had taken.
‘H
as she been talking to you?’ she asked in her turn.
‘Yes.’
‘What has she been saying to you?’
‘She told me that you … that you have suddenly decided to change … your former intention.’ Gemma’s head was bent again. She vanished altogether under her hat; nothing could be seen but her neck, supple and tender as the stalk of a big flower.
‘What intentions?’
‘Your intentions … relative to … the future arrangement of your life.’
‘That is … you are speaking … of Herr Klüber?’
‘Yes.’
‘Mamma told you I don’t want to be Herr Klüber’s wife?’
‘Yes.’
Gemma moved forward on the seat. The basket tottered, fell … a few cherries rolled on to the path. A minute passed by … another.
‘Why did she tell you so?’ he heard her voice saying. Sanin as before could only see Gemma’s neck. Her bosom rose and fell more rapidly than before.
‘Why? Your mother thought that as you and I, in a short time, have become, so to say, friends, and you have some confidence in me, I am in a position to give you good advice — and you would mind what I say.’
Gemma’s hands slowly slid on to her knees. She began plucking at the folds of her dress.
‘What advice will you give me, Monsieur Dimitri?’ she asked, after a short pause.
Sanin saw that Gemma’s fingers were trembling on her knees…. She was only plucking at the folds of her dress to hide their trembling. He softly laid his hand on those pale, shaking fingers.
‘Gemma,’ he said, ‘why don’t you look at me?’ She instantly tossed her hat back on to her shoulder, and bent her eyes upon him, confiding and grateful as before. She waited for him to speak…. But the sight of her face had bewildered, and, as it were, dazed him. The warm glow of the evening sun lighted up her youthful head, and the expression of that head was brighter, more radiant than its glow.
‘I will mind what you say, Monsieur Dimitri,’ she said, faintly smiling, and faintly arching her brows; ‘but what advice do you give me?’
‘What advice?’ repeated Sanin. ‘Well, you see, your mother considers that to dismiss Herr Klüber simply because he did not show any special courage the day before yesterday …’
‘Simply because?’ said Gemma. She bent down, picked up the basket, and set it beside her on the garden seat.
‘That … altogether … to dismiss him, would be, on your part … unreasonable; that it is a step, all the consequences of which ought to be thoroughly weighed; that in fact the very position of your affairs imposes certain obligations on every member of your family …’
‘All that is mamma’s opinion,’ Gemma interposed; ‘those are her words; but what is your opinion?’
‘Mine?’ Sanin was silent for a while. He felt a lump rising in his throat and catching at his breath. ‘I too consider,’ he began with an effort …
Gemma drew herself up. ‘Too? You too?’
‘Yes … that is …’ Sanin was unable, positively unable to add a single word more.
‘Very well,’ said Gemma. ‘If you, as a friend, advise me to change my decision — that is, not to change my former decision — I will think it over.’ Not knowing what she was doing, she began to tip the cherries back from the plate into the basket…. ‘Mamma hopes that I will mind what you say. Well … perhaps I really will mind what you say.’
‘But excuse me, Fräulein Gemma, I should like first to know what reason impelled you …’
‘I will mind what you say,’ Gemma repeated, her face right up to her brows was working, her cheeks were white, she was biting her lower lip. ‘You have done so much for me, that I am bound to do as you wish; bound to carry out your wishes. I will tell mamma … I will think again. Here she is, by the way, coming here.’
Frau Lenore did in fact appear in the doorway leading from the house to the garden. She was in an agony of impatience; she could not keep still. According to her calculations, Sanin must long ago have finished all he had to say to Gemma, though his conversation with her had not lasted a quarter of an hour.
‘No, no, no, for God’s sake, don’t tell her anything yet,’ Sanin articulated hurriedly, almost in alarm. ‘Wait a little … I will tell you, I will write to you … and till then don’t decide on anything … wait!’
He pressed Gemma’s hand, jumped up from the seat, and to Frau Lenore’s great amazement, rushed past her, and raising his hat, muttered something unintelligible — and vanished.
She went up to her daughter.
‘Tell me, please, Gemma…’
The latter suddenly got up and hugged her. ‘Dear mamma, can you wait a little, a tiny bit … till to - morrow? Can you? And till to - morrow not a word?… Ah!…’
She burst into sudden happy tears, incomprehensible to herself. This surprised Frau Lenore, the more as the expression of Gemma’s face was far from sorrowful, — rather joyful in fact.
‘What is it?’ she asked. ‘You never cry and here, all at once …’
‘Nothing, mamma, never mind! you only wait. We must both wait a little. Don’t ask me anything till to - morrow — and let us sort the cherries before the sun has set.’
‘But you will be reasonable?’
‘Oh, I’m very reasonable!’ Gemma shook her head significantly. She began to make up little bunches of cherries, holding them high above her flushed face. She did not wipe away her tears; they had dried of themselves.
XXV
Almost running, Sanin returned to his hotel room. He felt, he knew that only there, only by himself, would it be clear to him at last what was the matter, what was happening to him. And so it was; directly he had got inside his room, directly he had sat down to the writing - table, with both elbows on the table and both hands pressed to his face, he cried in a sad and choked voice, ‘I love her, love her madly!’ and he was all aglow within, like a fire when a thick layer of dead ash has been suddenly blown off. An instant more … and he was utterly unable to understand how he could have sat beside her … her! — and talked to her and not have felt that he worshipped the very hem of her garment, that he was ready as young people express it ‘to die at her feet.’ The last interview in the garden had decided everything. Now when he thought of her, she did not appear to him with blazing curls in the shining starlight; he saw her sitting on the garden - seat, saw her all at once tossing back her hat, and gazing at him so confidingly … and the tremor and hunger of love ran through all his veins. He remembered the rose which he had been carrying about in his pocket for three days: he snatched it out, and pressed it with such feverish violence to his lips, that he could not help frowning with the pain. Now he considered nothing, reflected on nothing, did not deliberate, and did not look forward; he had done with all his past, he leaped forward into the future; from the dreary bank of his lonely bachelor life he plunged headlong into that glad, seething, mighty torrent — and little he cared, little he wished to know, where it would carry him, or whether it would dash him against a rock! No more the soft - flowing currents of the Uhland song, which had lulled him not long ago … These were mighty, irresistible torrents! They rush flying onwards and he flies with them….
He took a sheet of paper, and without blotting out a word, almost with one sweep of the pen, wrote as follows: —
‘DEAR GEMMA, — You know what advice I undertook to give you, what your mother desired, and what she asked of me; but what you don’t know and what I must tell you now is, that I love you, love you with all the ardour of a heart that loves for the first time! This passion has flamed up in me suddenly, but with such force that I can find no words for it! When your mother came to me and asked me, it was still only smouldering in me, or else I should certainly, as an honest man, have refused to carry out her request…. The confession I make you now is the confession of an honest man. You ought to know whom you have to do with — between us there should exist no misunderstandings. You see that I cannot give you any advice…. I l
ove you, love you, love you — and I have nothing else — either in my head or in my heart!!
‘DM. SANIN.’
When he had folded and sealed this note, Sanin was on the point of ringing for the waiter and sending it by him…. ‘No!’ he thought, ‘it would be awkward…. By Emil? But to go to the shop, and seek him out there among the other employés, would be awkward too. Besides, it’s dark by now, and he has probably left the shop.’ Reflecting after this fashion, Sanin put on his hat, however, and went into the street; he turned a corner, another, and to his unspeakable delight, saw Emil before him. With a satchel under his arm, and a roll of papers in his hand, the young enthusiast was hurrying home.
‘They may well say every lover has a lucky star,’ thought Sanin, and he called to Emil.
The latter turned and at once rushed to him.
Sanin cut short his transports, handed him the note, and explained to whom and how he was to deliver it…. Emil listened attentively.
‘So that no one sees?’ he inquired, assuming an important and mysterious air, that said, ‘We understand the inner meaning of it all!’
‘Yes, my friend,’ said Sanin and he was a little disconcerted; however, he patted Emil on the cheek…. ‘And if there should be an answer…. You will bring me the answer, won’t you? I will stay at home.’
A Sportsman's Sketches: Works of Ivan Turgenev 1 Page 170