by Rebecca Main
“No, I am not,” she snaps back, attention never wavering from her task. “You are here tonight to make a polite impression and not offend. We are not here for a show of strength, merely to show that we have great power and choose to be peaceful with it. You should be formal and alert; there is no doubt in my mind that the Wselfwulfs will do their best to bait us. Of course, you should not be overly pleasant or eager to please. The Wselfwulfs will not look kindly on a sycophant.”
“Yes, well they have so many already,” Ryatt mutters.
“Indeed.” Irina can’t help but agree as she takes a breath. “Though you should not be overly eager to please, you should not strive to be too reserved. Lest you come across as standoffish. Don’t be overly meek and try not to let your pride respond for you. Lord knows how many battles have been started because of that little sin.”
“None of that makes sense! It’s completely contradictory.”
Irina colors. “I’m only trying to—”
Xander squeezes my hand. “You’ll be fine. Just stay by my side tonight.”
“And if your date has to ditch you tonight, it’ll be best to put yourself on my arm,” Atticus chimes from the other end of the limo we ride in. His chestnut hair is combed back stylishly, and the dark suit he wears fits his frame well. Extremely well. The beta is a large man standing at six four with the build of a tight end and an inviting smile almost constantly on his lips. He sends me a quick wink as I continue to stare.
My lip twitches upward in response. “I’ll most certainly remember that.” Xander growls playfully at his beta, but Atticus laughs it off. Leaning back in his seat he continues to speak with Katerina.
“He’s right,” Xander tells me softly, tucking a wayward curl behind my ear. I keep my eyes on my lap at the intimate touch. “You may need to stay near Atticus’s side at some point tonight. No doubt Marius will wish to speak with me and the other alphas at some point privately. I plan to depart before the night’s run commences, but I cannot guarantee I won’t be stolen away. Besides,” he tells me, voice still low and soft against my ear, “I’d rather you not face Marius, or any other member of his pack, unattended.”
The limo stops. One by one we exit just as the others pull up and the rest of the Adolphus pack unloads. I can do this.
“Have you spoken with Ben?” Xander asks casually. Too casually as he pulls on the cuffs of his suit sleeve. My mouth dries instantly, and my head moves calmly from side to side. He still hasn’t returned my call. The space between us becomes cold. I can feel the sharp stab of anger radiate from him, and the soulmark pinches in pain. “I expect it done before the end of this week,” he tells me harshly beneath his breath, holding out an arm.
I feel my own sharp anger rise at his commanding tone, but choose not to answer. Rather stiffly, I place my hand at the crook of his elbow, and we walk toward the opening doors. It’s now or never.
+++
“You’re doing fantastic,” Katerina says as she comes up to Xander and me. “Everyone seems to be playing nice tonight. A feat I am marveling at.”
“Dinner has yet to be served, but I’m sure someone will begin to bite soon enough,” he remarks.
“Thanks for the vote of confidence,” I say to ease the sting of Xander’s words. He’s unusually tense and gruff. Of course, in part because of my news, but mostly I think it has to do with the amount of testosterone in the room. Four alphas overfill a room. All claiming the position of strongest and most dominant. A clash of wills ending in teeth and blood seems inevitable, of that I am certain.
Much like the way my magic pulls at my core as I perform and hold complex spells, Xander uses the bond between us to attempt to calm his nerves. I’m not just a prize to be shown off on his arm tonight. I’m there to keep Xander in check. I act as a buffer, and for that reason, the Adolphus pack holds an advantage. Our wolves will hold their tempers better if their alpha does and—
My thoughts stop so suddenly I almost stumble into Xander as he guides me to the dinner table. He casts a worried glance my way, but I shake my head discreetly to call off his attention.
Our wolves?
Shit.
“Aleksandr, how good it is to see you,” chimes a lovely voice from behind. Xander bristles and stops, slowly turning us to face the new voice. I shoot a quick look Katerina’s way and see her face turn pale and drawn, before going neatly blank. The woman is roughly my height, slim, and with deeply tanned skin. It’s almost as if…
“Anastasia.” Xander gives the woman a curt nod.
“Well,” she says after a drawn-out moment, her eyes sweeping over the two of us. “Aren’t you going to introduce me to your soulmark?”
“Anastasia, this is Zoelle Baudelaire. Zoelle, this is Anastasia.”
She holds out her hand, “His mother,” she says. I should be praised for the way I maintain my mask of politeness in place, never hesitating in shaking Anastasia’s marble hand.
“Nice to meet you.” Her lips tighten around the edges of her mouth. I have clearly not given her the reaction she wanted. Good.
“The pleasure is all mine, dear. I feel as though I haven’t seen my boy in ages, and now here he is, with his soulmark no less. My how time has passed. It seems like only yesterday he was my young little man.” I maintain my easy smile. “You know, dear, if you hadn’t come along my Carrie over there would have no doubt been on Xander’s arm tonight.” She lets out a shrill little laugh, pointing out a woman in a tight red midi dress across the room.
She is surrounded by a large group of men, but she only has eyes for Xander. As if sensing my regard, she turns her icy blue eyes my way and shares with me a wicked smile. She is stunning, and she knows it. Owns it, wearing her confidence like some badge of honor. And that smile… it’s a little too knowing for my liking. I feel as if I’ve been knocked in the stomach, my breath sweeping from my body in a singular whoosh. The eyes in the room begin to look our way.
“Oh,” I finally remark, swallowing thickly. The rapid beat of my heart sounds in my ears, but I know that I am not the only one who can hear it. Every single person in this room can. I somehow catch Atticus’s eyes at the back of the room. He gives me a wink and takes in a deep breath. I do the same and straighten, returning my gaze to Anastasia. Her eyes gleam in satisfaction at my discomfort. I swallow once more before speaking again. “How quaint.”
The words slip past my lips before I can stop them and the room immediately quiets. Anastasia bristles, nose tilting upward. “Quaint indeed,” she jeers, eyeing me with distaste before brushing past us.
“Explain please,” I whisper to Xander once the room begins to speak in earnest again. The rising voices thankfully hiding my own.
“Anastasia is my birth mother,” he explains shortly. “She left my father, when I was six for Rollins. Katerina is my stepmother, and Ryatt and Irina are her biological children.”
“You are no less my son,” Katerina remarks from the side so quietly I almost miss her whispered words. She passes by us to her seat, her hand brushing against Xander’s arm in doing so. “Do not forget.”
Xander doesn’t acknowledge Katerina’s comments. Instead, he wraps his arm around my waist and guides me to my seat.
“And who is Carrie,” I ask quickly before I can be engaged in other conversations.
“Anastasia’s daughter. My half sister.”
Oh. Is this one of the “old traditions” Irina eluded to during our shopping excursion? I try not to cringe outwardly as a server sets pumpkin soup before me.
“She means nothing to me,” he murmurs. His fingers reach out to graze my hand but pull back at the last moment. A strange sort of fervor hangs to his words. A cut of vulnerability he does not mean to share. Before I can stop myself, my hand covers his and gives a gentle squeeze. He stares at me in nothing short of amazement and a surge of pleasure scores across my body at our contact. For once, I do not retreat.
“I know,” I reply shyly, catching the glint of my bracelet in the
light.
“Good evening, everyone!” Rollins booms. He stands chest puffed and arms held out wide before the gathered tables. “It is my deepest pleasure to welcome you here tonight to pay tribute to these fine youths embarking on their first Lunar Ceremony and Full Moon Hunt. This coming of age tradition, which has been passed down through the ages, deserves our utmost respect. Moreover, I am proud that we might all come together on this eve to witness my nephew and godson, Marius, take on the hunt tonight.”
I cast a glance toward Irina across the table. She ignores my confused expression and keeps her eyes trained on Rollins. Hunt? I thought tonight is just about the pack running through the woods with the new wolves. At least, that’s what Ryatt explained. My gaze shifts toward the other Adolphus brother. His features, though laid smoothly to reflect no emotion are ever so slightly strained.
“But tonight, we not only celebrate our young who come of age. Tonight, we also celebrate the power of the soulmark.” Curious and knowing stares come our way at Rollins’s obvious pause. “Two of our own, Knox and Avery, have recently completed the binding of their soulmarks to two wonderful wolves. Though they are not here tonight, I assure you it is for a good reason.” He gives the crowd a salacious grin. “To all those we honor tonight, let us raise a glass in their favor. To the youth, may your paws always find the earth strong beneath you. To the women, may you bear the pack worthy pups. Long live the days of the pack! Let the moon light our way on even the darkest of nights!”
Glasses raise in the air at his closing remarks, but a disturbing charge lances through the air around the room. I try to keep calm while the meal progresses, busying myself with small talk and counting the members of each pack. I falter as I reach the Maccon pack, my numbers falling short.
“I thought to see more of the Maccons tonight,” I comment lightly to Xander as the dinner plates begin to be cleared by staff.
“It would seem as though the Maccons thought better of bringing their entire pack tonight.”
“But I thought—“
“Hush,” he commands, gaze pinning me in place. “No more talking about the Maccons.” A protest sits ready on my lips, but the words are lodged in my throat. It is a disconcerting feeling, made even more so when I try to speak once more but can’t. Piercing dread and a spike of fear resonate throughout my body as I realize the familiar bindings of some kind of spell. Xander’s hand cups the back of my neck and brings our heads close. “Don’t panic, Zoelle. Do not cause a scene. Everything is fine. We’ll stay an hour more and return home. There’s nothing to get worked up over. Calm down.” My body obeys, but my mind still races in horror. How did Xander suddenly possess such control over my body?
“What did you do?” I hiss. I feel at odds with my body. My consciousness rebelling against its treachery, even as my breathing evens out to a placid pace. I’m calming down, I think with astonishment, feeling my anger retreat. I sink back in my high-backed chair. This doesn’t make sense. How can Xander’s simple commands have such hold over me?
“It’s the mark, dear,” Katerina coos from her place a seat down. “There’s nothing to fret over. The second portion of the soul binding—the marking—is always a bit unsettling.” I open my mouth to retort, when flashes of memories barrage me.
He kisses up and along the apex of my thighs, mumbling nonsense against my skin as his fingers take up the work…
“Please,” I beg as my other hand reaches inside his shirt and inches toward his soulmark…
I cannot describe the feeling that pulsates between us. Nor the weight of the anchor that wraps us tightly together…
My horror and anger return. I tremble in response. The loose sense of calm I am commanded to have crumbling as my heart breaks. Katerina reaches out to pat my knee, leaning over one of the scariest looking members of Xander’s pack to reassure me, Justin. Though dressed in a fine black suit, tailored to his stocky form, it only succeeds in making him look like some well-dressed bodyguard. Not a dinner guest.
“Xander really is quite awful at explaining all of the finer details, isn’t he? You must forgive him, but know that if you have any questions, you might come to me. I’ll explain everything, dear. I do love our short chats and would love to spend more time with you.” Katerina straightens and gives Justin a charming smile for putting up with her antics.
Something trails down my neck and back—Xander’s hand—I realize faintly. It slips away at his mother’s commentary, moving to rest in his lap. Balled in a white-knuckled fist. His gaze anywhere but at me.
I don’t speak. Too many thoughts and emotions rage through me to discern which are my own. A soft rage burns in my throat. How could I be so naïve? How could Xander do this to me? My foolish heart has led me astray once more. Among the hurt and confusion, I feel an indignant anger and shame. It must be Xander’s. I disregard his shame, the small swell of sorrow I feel aching upward through our bond. That he can possibly find a reason to be angry with me only fuels my own ire.
“Let us allow the women to retire to the drawing room and men to the parlor. Those who will run tonight may prepare themselves in the meantime.” I ignore Xander’s proffered hand to help me stand, turning and rising from my seat on my own. Shoulders set stiffly back as I stare past him.
“Katerina, walk with me?” I ask, voice deceptively calm.
“Of course, dear. Justin, do follow behind.” A pang of hurt jolts my heart, but I refuse to meet Xander’s eyes.
“I’d love to know more about the soul binding. Your son isn’t always so forthcoming with the details.” Katerina reaches my side in a single stride, slipping her arm through mine and giving me a kind smile.
“I would love to tell you.” Thank goodness. We wait till most of the people have emptied the room, trailing behind the last of the women to bring up the rear. “What would you like to know exactly?”
Everything. “I know about the soul binding process,” I begin after swallowing past several lumps in my throat. “I know there is the sealing, the marking which involves blood, and the binding that requires spellbound words from both Xander and me. What I don’t understand is this… feeling. Why does Xander have such control over me? I don’t understand.”
Her steps slow. “It seems my son has done you a grave injustice, if he has yet to explain the added effects an alpha brings to the process.” I flush.
A bitter laugh pushes past my lips. “And here I thought we’re supposed to be each other’s soul mates.”
“You are,” she tells me adamantly. “Your souls are but two halves of one yet to be complete. The soulmark isn’t just about finding your soul mate. It is about becoming whole. Becoming one. As you were always meant to be. Though many face trails during this process, I admit the alpha aspect can be daunting. My son is a powerful alpha. Wise beyond his years, having taken on the pack at such a young age, but he is a good man. He always puts his pack first, but that can be a problem when it comes to matters of the heart.”
I lean into Katerina’s side, slowing my pace as we walk to our destination. “Why can he control me, Katerina?”
My low-pitched plea softens the older woman. Her brows furrowing as she gazes at me with sympathy. “In completing the marking, your souls are brought closer together. Close enough that you have been drawn into the pack, my dear, sweet girl. All members of the pack do as the alpha wishes.”
A shaky breath escapes me. “I didn’t realize,” I say. My shoulders sink as I stare blankly ahead. “No one told me.”
“Your family may not have understood that particular nuance, but my son should have.” Her voice goes hard, and she squeezes my arm reassuringly. “Make no mistake, Zoelle. I will be having a talk with my son about the way in which he has treated you. It is unacceptable, and he knows better. I fear he is too caught up in the threats that linger too near our pack to act as the man I know him to be. Good. Kind. Respectful. I hope you’ll find it in your hear to forgive him. I would hate to find you driven from our lives. I would hate to
find you driven from my life. You have such a lovely warmth about you, my girl.”