Her mother was right, but God still seemed distant – not really gone, just standing afar. Maybe He was just waiting for Deborah to catch up or ask for help – like Father used to do when they would go for walks and she would tire. If the trek was too exhausting, she would beg her father to come and carry her. He always did. She wondered if her heavenly Father would carry her now.
“I’ve been thinking I’d like to complete my medical training. I want to go back East to live with Aunt Wilhelmina and attend classes. I’ve saved some money and can purchase my own train ticket.”
“Oh, Deborah . . . please don’t go. I missed you so much when you were gone before.”
“But it would be a good thing, and when I complete my studies, I could come back here or to Lufkin. I wouldn’t live far away. I love this land. I am at home here.”
“Then why leave it?”
In the muted light of the lantern, Deborah could see her mother’s worried expression. This wasn’t how she’d wanted things to go. “We can talk about this later. I’m starved. Can I help with supper?”
“It’s all ready, but we delayed eating to wait for you; we figured to send out the men soon to look for you. Everyone will be so glad to see you’ve returned.”
Making their way up the steps, Mother put her arm around Deborah’s shoulders. “I’ll be praying God will give you peace and help you through this difficult time. I love you, and I only want the best for you. He wants the best for you, too. Never forget that.”
They joined the others in the house. Most of the men were assembled in the front room and Uncle Arjan seemed to be instructing them.
“She’s back!” G.W. said, leaping to his feet. He hardly limped at all as he crossed the room to take hold of her. “Where have you been? We’ve been worried about you.”
“I . . . fell asleep.”
“What were you thinking?” G.W.’s tone was quite stern.
“I obviously wasn’t keeping a clear mind,” Deborah said. “Now stop fretting, big brother. I’m fine.” She forced herself to take strength in the moment. So long as she put her mind on the worry she’d caused others, perhaps she could keep her own concerns at bay.
“Oh, Deborah!” Lizzie exclaimed, coming into the room.
Turning just as Lizzie embraced her, Deborah felt guilt drive away her fears for Christopher. “I’m so sorry to have worried all of you.” She hugged Lizzie and pulled away to face the others. “Please forgive me.”
“We’re just glad you’re unharmed,” Uncle Arjan said. His smile assured her that all was forgiven.
“Let’s go eat,” Mother said, putting her arm around Lizzie. “If I recall, Sissy has made us a wonderful dessert. She wouldn’t tell me what it was, but said it was something new and quite delicious. But first, we must get through the main meal.”
“That won’t be a problem, Miz Vandermark,” Warren declared. Several of the other loggers agreed and followed her and Lizzie toward the dining room.
Arjan gave G.W. a slap on the shoulder and grinned. “Maybe we should harness that little sister of yours. That might keep her out of trouble.” He winked at Deborah.
Deborah heard someone laugh from behind her and turned to find Jake. “So you think this is funny?” She narrowed her eyes and feigned anger. “I’m going to tell Sissy not to give you any dessert.”
“You wouldn’t,” he said, grinning impishly. “I thought I was your favorite punk.”
She rolled her eyes. “I have no favorites.”
“Well, that’s not . . . ” Jake’s eyes widened and the words seemed to stick in his throat. Deborah thought he looked as if he’d seen a ghost.
“What’s wrong with you?” she asked.
Deborah heard her uncle give a whistle. She couldn’t imagine what had stirred such a reaction. Whirling on her heel, she felt as if the wind had been knocked from her. Standing in the doorway was Christopher.
“Deborah.” He spoke her name like a prayer.
It was all Deborah heard. The room closed in and went dark as she felt strong arms wrap around her from behind. After that she knew nothing more.
Jake lifted the unconscious Deborah in his arms and shook his head at the man who rushed forward. “I’ve got her.”
The doctor’s gaze narrowed. “Not if I have anything to say about it.”
Arjan stepped between them and took Deborah from Jake’s arms. Jake immediately missed the scent of her hair and the softness of her in his arms. He stepped back, but his gaze never left Dr. Clayton’s face. There was an unspoken challenge between them, but Jake had a feeling that wasn’t enough. Deborah thought she was in love with this man, but Jake had a plan to change all of that.
He couldn’t let the doc just come back from the dead and steal the woman he planned to marry.
CHAPTER 30
Deborah opened her eyes to find Christopher sitting beside her. He looked pounds thinner and far more careworn. Was that a scar along his left eye? She shook her head, not quite trusting her eyes. Reaching up, she touched his beard-stubbled face.
“Are you really here?”
“Yes.” He pulled her up into his arms and crushed her against him.
Deborah could scarcely draw a breath, but she didn’t care. She clung to Christopher as if he were the only thing that would save her from certain death. There were no words – no other thoughts. They were the only two people in the universe, and this moment was all they had.
She didn’t want him to ever let go of her. If this were merely a dream, Deborah never wanted to wake up. The warmth of his embrace left little doubt that it was all real. Christopher had returned to her.
Reluctantly, Deborah pulled away to look deeply into Christopher’s eyes. “I thought you were dead.”
“I very nearly was,” he replied. He touched her cheek and trailed his finger along her jaw.
Tears formed in her eyes, blurring her vision. Deborah closed her eyes and felt the tears trail down her cheeks.
“Don’t cry, sweetheart. It’s all over – it’s behind us.”
She opened her eyes. “When you left, I understood that your brother needed you. But I needed you, too, and I didn’t understand how you could so easily cast me aside.”
“There was nothing easy in leaving you. You were all I could think of – even at the worst of the storm. I wanted only to live in order to get back to you. I will always love you.” He lowered his mouth to hers and kissed her gently.
Deborah wanted the moment to go on forever. She didn’t care about the propriety of the situation or that she was sitting on her mother’s bed, embracing the man she loved. None of that mattered.
He took hold of her face as he pulled away. “I thought so often of doing that.”
“Where have you been?” she asked in a whisper. “Why didn’t you let me know you were all right?”
“I wanted to, believe me. I was hurt for a time – my brother, too. They took me south to Corpus, and I couldn’t send word to you.”
“I read just today that the signal man in Indianola died. He drowned with an unidentified doctor. I was so afraid it was you. I didn’t even want to go on living.”
“I’m so sorry. I came as soon as I could.” He smoothed back her hair. “My brother was much worse off than I was. After I started to heal, I worked to help him. Calvin gradually recovered.”
“Were there many injuries?” she asked. “Were you in Indianola when the storm hit?”
He nodded. “Yes to both questions. We had no real warning. We knew a storm was moving in, but some of the old-timers didn’t think it would be all that bad. They mostly sat around, telling stories of the hurricane that had wreaked havoc in the seventies. We had figured to leave, but the sheriff told me it wasn’t a good idea to try and travel with a hurricane bearing down, so we decided to take shelter and wait it out.”
“I read about the floodwaters and the fire.”
“The water came in so quickly – it was like nothing I’d ever seen before. The winds were so fi
erce, you couldn’t hear the words of the person standing next to you.” He shook his head. “Then the fire spread, destroying everything it touched. We were forced from the building. Into the flooded streets. Into the heart of the storm.” He shuddered.
Deborah hugged him close. “I’m so very sorry.”
“I nearly lost my hold on Calvin,” he continued as if he hadn’t heard her. Deborah released him while he went on. “We were being swept into a fierce current. It had a terrible pull that we tried hard to fight. I managed to get hold of a post of some sort. I held fast to it and to Calvin while the water kept rising. It was a nightmare.”
“But you’re safe now,” she said, gently stroking his arm. “You’re safe.”
He looked at her blankly for a moment, then drew a deep breath. “I’m here with you. I should never have gone.”
“Your brother needed you. I understood.”
“I’m sorry that I handled things so badly.” He hung his head. “There have been far too many secrets between us, and I have to be honest with you now. It might cost me – it might take you from me – but I cannot lie to you anymore.”
“I have my secrets, too,” she replied. “You may well not want me after you hear them.”
He looked at her in disbelief. “There is nothing you could say that would ever make that possible.”
She cocked her head slightly and smiled for the first time since she’d awakened. “And yet you think it possible for me to stop wanting you?”
This made him drop his hold and lower his head. “You don’t know the truth of my past. It’s not something I’ve borne very well.”
Deborah took hold of his hands. “Let me bear it with you, then. Start with your brother. You said he was injured, but you didn’t speak of the charges against him. What was the outcome of his trial?”
“He was acquitted. A witness came forward and defended Calvin’s actions. He made it clear my brother had no choice in the matter. It was kill or be killed.”
“And where is Calvin now?”
“I sent him back to Kansas City,” Christopher replied matter-of-factly, pulling his hands from hers. “He had a broken wrist and badly injured leg. Even so, he’s promised to seek employment and help our mother. He seems to be a changed man.”
“Perhaps this ordeal opened his eyes.”
Christopher lifted his gaze. “Perhaps. I suppose only time will tell.”
“And what else must I know?” she asked.
He drew a deep breath. “My name.”
“But I already know that.”
He shook his head. “No. You know what I changed it to.”
She looked at him oddly. She had imagined that he would tell her his mother had been married before – that he didn’t share the same father as his brothers and sisters. “What are you saying?”
“I wasn’t born with the last name of Clayton. It’s actually my middle name. My mother named me Christopher Clayton . . . Kelle-her. I dropped the Kelleher to keep people from realizing that I am Irish.”
Confusion swirled through her thoughts. “But why?”
“Why? Because the Irish are hated in many places. My father and mother worked hard to disassociate themselves from the prejudices and conflicts, but it followed them no matter where they went. The accident that nearly took my father’s life was a fight between the Irish workers and the non-Irish. The attitudes and actions against those of Irish ancestry were not so different as what we’ve seen here in the South with the blacks.”
“I’m truly sorry, Christopher. I had no idea.”
“When I went east to study medicine, I decided that I would go by Clayton. That was still my name, and it could be associated with the English if questions arose. After all, I also shared some English ancestry.”
“And did it work?” she asked.
“It did. I felt like a liar, but it worked. I never figured it would matter much in the long run. I didn’t have an Irish brogue, so I believed I could forever bury the truth. I told my mother and siblings that I was going to call myself Christopher Clayton and that any correspondence should be addressed accordingly. My father was livid. He disowned me and told me to never again darken his doorstep. Then he was injured in the fight that killed some of his friends. It killed his spirit and left him without hope.”
She reached up to touch his face. “I don’t care if you’re Irish or Indian or anything else. I love you. I never knew how dearly until you left me.”
Deborah’s mother came into the room with a basin. “How is she?”
Christopher eased away from Deborah. “She’s much better. I shouldn’t have shocked her with my return that way.”
“Do you feel up to some supper, Deborah?” Mother put the basin on the dresser. “If not, I could bring you something here.”
“I can come to the table. In fact, I feel quite well – almost as if the world has suddenly righted itself.” She paused and looked past Christopher to where her mother stood. “Mother, how do you feel about Irish people?”
“Irish? Why do you ask a question like that? The Irish are fine folks. We’ve had dear friends who were Irish.”
Deborah grinned. “It’s not important right now. I just wondered.”
The special dessert turned out to be a most amazing chocolate cake that Sissy said was made entirely without flour or cornmeal. The cake was then drenched in a buttery brown sugar sauce and topped with whipped cream. There wasn’t so much as a crumb left after everyone pushed back from the table.
“That was a mighty fine meal,” Uncle Arjan said, giving Sissy a nod. “Especially that cake. Mighty fine.”
Sissy laughed and got to her feet. “I’s glad you enjoyed it. Much more pickin’ at the plate, and I won’t even have to wash it.”
Mother began gathering the dishes, and Deborah started to do likewise. “Oh no,” she told Deborah. “You go spend time with Dr. Clayton.”
“Thank you very much for having me to supper,” Christopher replied. “And thank you for freeing Deborah from her chores.” He turned and smiled at her. “Would you care to take a walk?”
“It’s already dark and gettin’ a bit chilled out there,” Uncle Arjan declared. “Maybe you’d prefer to sit on the porch? I’m sure we can find something to do elsewhere – can’t we, boys?”
The rest of the men chuckled and got up from the table. All but Jake. He didn’t seem at all happy about this new arrangement. Deborah allowed Christopher to help her from her chair while the others shuffled out of the room.
Deborah looked to Christopher and smiled. “Let me get my wrap.”
They made their way to the front porch swing. Deborah enjoyed Christopher’s arm around her and leaned closer.
“When I thought I might never see you again,” he said, “I came to realize how important you were to me. I had always dreamed of the kind of woman who could share my life – my desire to help people. When I came here and met you, it seemed that you fulfilled all of my hopes for a wife. I didn’t ask you to court me without giving it great consideration.”
Deborah straightened and looked at him. “And I didn’t accept without great consideration.”
He laughed. “You said yes before the words were hardly out of my mouth.”
“That’s not true, Christopher Clayton Kelleher.” She stopped and smiled. “I like the sound of that. Anyway, you are completely mistaken. As I recall, we discussed your family and your age before I ever agreed to court you. Oh, and we talked about your willingness to marry a female doctor.”
He shrugged. “I’m still pondering that one.”
She elbowed him and got to her feet. “Well, I suppose you can ponder that alone, because I plan to go back East and finish my medical training.” She gave him a coy smile. “Unless, of course, you know some other way to remedy the matter.”
“I might have some ideas,” he said in a low, husky voice.
His tone caused Deborah to feel weak in the knees. Goodness, but this man could set her all a-flutter. He
held out his hand, and she again sat beside him.
“The past doesn’t matter,” she said, looking into his eyes. “I’d much rather think about where we go from here.”
“Where would you like to go?”
She smiled. “Well, I’d like our courtship to be reinstated, for one.”
He shook his head. “I’ve no interest in that.” He took hold of her hand. “I’d rather we begin our engagement.”
Deborah felt her breath catch. Had he really just proposed?
“Say that again,” she whispered.
He smiled. “Would you marry me, Miss Vandermark?”
“I know you two wanted some privacy,” Jake Wythe said, coming up the porch steps, “but I figure this is important enough to interrupt.”
Frustrated, Deborah pulled back from Christopher’s hold.
“What is it, Jake?”
“I heard the doc propose to you.”
“What business is that of yours?” Christopher asked.
“I want to propose, as well.”
Deborah looked at him in surprise. “I beg your pardon?”
Jake smiled. “You heard me. I want to marry you, Miss Deborah. I know you care for me – maybe not exactly the same way you do the doc, but I figure we deserve a chance to explore your feelings for me before you go runnin’ off to marry him.”
“I think you’ve misjudged me, Jake. I do care about you, but . . .” She fell silent, unsure of what to say. She could feel Christopher tense. The last thing she wanted was a fight.
“Doc left you, without even speakin’ to ya face-to-face. Just because he finally figured out what he wants doesn’t mean you should just fall into his lap. He was unkind to you, and you deserve better.”
Deborah got to her feet and Christopher was quick to follow. “He had his reasons for leaving me,” she said, putting herself between the two men. “I don’t need to explain them to you. I’ve never led you on or given you reason to think that I held more affection for you than I do. Please don’t ruin this happy occasion for me.”
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