by Dani Hoots
On the way back I also gathered some groceries. Brian didn’t give me a list, of course, so I just got things I liked to eat and some variety of sweets to cook. Deep down, I did fear that he would be mad that I didn’t get what he wanted though. I tried to push that fear back, he wasn’t my family, he was nicer than that, at least to me.
As I ventured through town, I stayed away from areas I knew my family to visit, not wanting to cause a scene. Although, I figured they were probably relieved not to deal with me anymore and that they had their ‘perfect’ son back. I was glad to be rid of them, even though I wasn’t quite sure what to make of my situation as of yet. Brian had showed me compassion thus far, but I had no idea if that would last. I wasn’t yet used to it and feared that if I did, it would go away.
I arrived back to the house and plotted out Brian’s strange work schedule. I figured it would be easier to sleep while he was at work and wake when he arrived back, that way I could have everything ready for his next day of work and any errands he wanted me to do I could do in the morning before he awakes. Deciding this to be the best, I set my alarm for two in the morning.
I awoke just as planned and put one of my newly acquired dresses on. It felt good to have new clothes, ones that weren’t second hand or something sewn by a neighbor who felt bad for me. It made me have a little more confidence in myself and I hoped that maybe Brian would think they looked nice on me. I didn’t admit to myself that I found him charming, but I did enjoy his company. He made me feel as if someone could care about me.
I was wrong about that because what I didn’t know was that Brian already had his eyes on a woman that night. He rolled in about a quarter to three with a girl wrapped around him. I stood there in the entry, mouth dropped.
“Oh, right, you’re here,” he said. I almost slapped him for that, acting as if he forgot I was there. He knew damn well I was there waiting for him.
“Who’s she?” the woman pointed at me.
He kissed her on the lips. “Just a maid, don’t worry love,” he turned to me and handed me a piece of paper. “These are things that need to be done when I awake,” he picked the girl up and headed up the stairs. “G’night!”
I shook my head. After all those things he said about respecting women, I thought he was different. Nope, he was just a pig like the rest of the men I knew. After shaking my head, I unfolded the note to reveal it only having one word. ‘Cake’.
Rubbing my forehead, I realized that he had acted surprised when he saw me, so how did he have a note for me? I wondered if the note was actually for me or if he just happened to have a note for someone else and realized he could give it to me to do. Rolling my eyes, I started on his cake.
It took Brian a week to remember I was there. He would come back with some girl, all different I might add, act surprised I was there, then give me some random task to do. Sometimes it was to cook something, other times it was to deliver a letter or package to some stranger. I didn’t ask questions but did as he said, even though it crushed my heart. Though, being ignored was a lot better than the alternative. It wasn’t like I had anywhere else to go and Brian gave me money for anything I needed. All I had to do was what he said, which really wasn’t much.
A month went by, Brian coming back early in the morning with either blood all over his clothes or with a woman in his arms. I didn’t know which one I preferred. It was probably the blood because then at least I was the one who got to undress him, and have a conversation that wasn’t just, ‘oh, ignore her she’s my maid’. The more I hated seeing him with other girls, the more I began to realize I had feelings for him.
In the mornings, I got to spend time with him. The girls usually left before he ever got up and I would always open the door for them on their way out. It was nice spending time alone with him, hearing him talk about his enterprise. He was a genius, knowing when to use fear and when to use politics but this story isn’t about his empire, this is about something far darker.
It was in August when he woke me up late one night, a never ending knock on my door. I blinked awake and realized it was not even nine at night. The sun was just going down.
“Anne!” he called through the door. “I need you to do something for me.”
I stumbled out of bed and opened the door. I still just had my nightgown on, I didn’t really care. It was unheard of a man seeing you in a nightgown in that era but truthfully so was living with a man you weren’t married to. I couldn’t ever get him to look at me in that way, or at least that was what I thought then. Now I knew I was wrong. “What is it?”
He handed me a dress. “Get changed, I’m taking you to your first party.”
“What?” is the only response I could come up with. I didn’t have much experience in how to react when a man wakes you up in the middle of the night and hands you a dress.
“The Wallace brothers are having a party down in Old Colony avenue, I do hope I can enjoy your company.”
I thought about replying ‘you’re crazy’ and be mad that after all this time he finally acted like I existed more than just to clean the house, but decided that I should be happy that he wanted me to leave the house with him for once. “I have to get ready first.”
“That’s fine, I will wait downstairs.”
This was definitely a development in working for Brian, even though I didn’t quite understand his reasoning behind it. Personally, I just wanted to get out of the house. I got ready as fast as I could, knowing I couldn’t let him wait for too long, he wasn’t a patient man I had gathered from the stories he told of what he did to men who made him wait. I didn’t want to be that person in the story.
Brian had picked out a long red dress, the cut in the front a little lower than I would like. Gladly most of the scars I had were hidden still. My arms were still freckled with some but I had grown to be used to be people seeing them. The injury on my cheek had almost healed too and I covered the rest with makeup. I put on some lipstick to match the dress and hurried down the stairs. Brian just stared as I spun around in front of him. His eyes seemed to glitter as he watched me and it made me blush.
He clapped his hands together. “You look dazzling. Are you ready?”
I nodded and wrapped my arm around his. A car was waiting for us outside and Brian held the door for me. After he entered behind me, the car started towards Old Colony avenue.
“Thank you for the dress,” I said.
“Not a problem, you have been working hard. Thought you might need a night out.”
I smiled, glad to find that he still thought about me, contrary of what it seems when he brings different girls home every night. “How did you know my size?”
He laughed. “Years of experience.”
I didn’t want to think as to what he meant by that comment and decided to leave it alone. God only knew how many women Brian had measured up over the years. I didn’t know if I should be impressed, concerned, or jealous.
A crowd was beginning to form outside of the Sportlight, guys dressed in suits and hats and women dressed in fancy gowns such as the one Brian had bought for me. The building was covered in brick and wood, small lanterns lining the exterior. I had never seen so many people trying to get into a venue, although I actually didn’t have an experience in the matter. Brian ushered me out and the crowd parted as he led me into the Sportlight.
Tables were scattered around but most people stood and chatted away as a jazz band played in the background. The bar was filled with people holding cash, trying to get their drink ordered. Others held cigars and cigarettes, blowing smoke without even thinking about the consequences. I had never been to a place like this and I didn’t know how to take it all in. I had actually expected something a lot smaller and didn’t think so many people could fit in such a small building. I was wrong.
“Is this party legal?” I questioned as we stepped up to the bar. It was a stupid question, really, but I wasn’t used to going out with Brian and seeing exactly what he does. I usually only saw the af
termath.
“Anne, is anything I do legal?” With a smile, he ordered us two drinks. I was going to refuse the drink, since I hadn’t ever had a taste before, being illegal and all, but I decided not to bring the matter up. So I took a sip.
And I swore I about died.
The drink burned as it went down, my mind feeling like someone hit it with a sledge hammer. I didn’t understand how someone could drink the stuff. Brian downed his with one gulp.
“Another,” he slapped his hand on the counter. I didn’t understand how he could do it, I could barely take one sip at a time. I smiled at him as he enjoyed everything going on. It made me happy to see him not as stressed, and not with another girl.
After the bartender gave him another drink, Brian held out his arm. “Shall we?”
I accepted his arm and we ventured through the crowd. Women glared at me and I received more winks from men than I would ever care to remember. I tried to ignore them, look the other way and such, but I had never had so many people notice me before. I knew my face had to be red so I tried to just look down at my feet.
“Ah Brian, glad to see that you made it,” a man greeted Brian with a handshake. His hair was a curly brown and his eyes revealed more horrors than I would ever care for in a life time. “You must introduce me to this lady of yours.”
Brian wrapped his arm around me. “This is Anne. Anne, this is Frank Wallace.”
Frank grabbed my hand and kissed it. “Well, miss Anne, I do hope you like the party, and bravo to you being able to put up with this man. I’ve heard many stories about how much of a monster he has been. I do hope you can do your best to keep him in line.”
I gulped, wondering how bad Brian could be if a fellow gang leader called him a monster. I hoped he was just teasing. “I try my best.”
“You must be doing well if Brian brought you here, I haven’t ever known him to bring a girl here, usually he just leaves with one.”
“Oh, he does that too,” I commented as I took another sip of the drink. I about had a coughing fit.
Frank laughed. “Sense of humor, this one. You better keep her close, Brian. You don’t want this one stolen away.”
“Don’t get any ideas, don’t want our parties to have fighting because of some girl,” Brian added. I glanced at him. What did he mean by some girl? And why did he act as if I wasn’t there. I thought about saying something but decided to hold my tongue in such company.
“The thought never crossed my mind,” Frank’s attention turned away for a moment. “I see that a client has arrived. Brian, it has been a pleasure as always.”
Brian raised his glass to him as Frank ran off to the other side of the speakeasy.
“How many maids have you had?” I whispered.
“A few. None have lasted as long as you, great job by the way. I was sure that you would have left by now.”
Did that mean he didn’t want me around? Truth was I didn’t have anywhere to go and I sort of liked living somewhere that I felt safe, as ironic as that was. “And where would I go?”
Brian shrugged. “Anywhere I suppose.”
Easy for him to say, he had money to go places. If he wanted, he could run away from all this, though I doubted he ever would. People treated him like a king here and I was pretty sure it made his ego flair up even more than it already was.
We mingled around, Brian talking to different men about the latest shipments, deals, and trades he was open to. He also talked to Joshua, his second-in-command about plans for the next week. I half listened, mostly not wanting to know exactly what he was up to during the evenings when he was out. I didn’t want to think about it. After a while of talking, he turned to me when we were alone.
“Anne, will you be a dear and get us some more drinks?” he nodded towards the bartender.
“Sure, I will be right back,” I took his glass and headed towards the bar. After asking for another drink just for Brian, I really didn’t want another, I turned to find Brian talking to two women. I frowned. They had their hands on him, flirting away. I could feel my cheeks start to get hot. That was why he wanted me, to make women want him even more. I just stared in disgust, shaking my head. He must have noticed because he excused himself and headed over to where I stood.
“What’s wrong?” he asked as he grabbed his drink.
“You just brought me to make girls jealous and want you more, didn’t you?” I accused.
He took a sip. “Yeah, your point?”
I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. I had thought he really wanted to take me out. Me. But I was just another way to get a woman to go home with him. It was pathetic. “That’s disgusting.”
Brian laughed. “What, are you jealous?”
“No, I just thought...” I shook my head. It was stupid, I shouldn’t have thought I was special, that he cared for me when he taught my brother a lesson for hurting me. “I don’t know.”
“I just thought maybe you wanted to get out of the house and go out somewhere fun,” he said honestly. “This was just a plus to it all.”
“You are just using me then? To get a girl in your bed? That just seems a little low, doesn’t it?”
Brian stroked the side of my cheek and moved a piece of my hair out of my face. I could feel goose bumps forming on my skin. What was he doing? I held my breath. He leaned in closer. “Did you want me to sleep with you?”
I could feel the blood rush to my cheeks. “I didn’t say that!” I snapped back.
He laughed as he stepped back and took another drink. “Well then, doesn’t this arrangement seem fair? You get to dress up and come to parties such as this, but nothing after.”
“It’s fair,” I lied. I still didn’t want to agree to it, but I also didn’t want him making more comments about me wanting to go to bed with him. Although, I admit, the thought did cross my mind.
“Alright then, whenever you’re ready to leave, let me know and I will call a taxi for you,” he headed back towards the girls, leaving me standing there alone.
I turned to the bartender. “I’ll take another.”
I didn’t stay that much longer, hating the feeling that was gathering in my stomach as I watched Brian with those girls. But I couldn’t say anything, I couldn’t let him know how I truly felt, not if I wanted to keep my job and stay away from home. No, I didn’t want things to truly change because I knew it could end up for the worse.
Brian called the taxi just as he promised and the driver took me home. I could feel tears forming in my eyes as I sat there, alone. I wiped them away. I would just have to deal with the pain and realize I wasn’t anything special. I never was.
An hour or two later he arrived with both of the girls he was flirting with. I ignored them as he took them up to his room. I had already changed into my regular clothes and begun my usual day of running errands and keeping the place clean. I wasn’t going to get anymore sleep knowing what was going on in the room next to me.
This charade went on a couple nights a week for a month. I was introduced to all sorts of men that before a few months ago, I would have been afraid to meet. Now, I knew just not to ask questions, stay around Brian, and I would be fine. Although initially I was furious with Brian, it still was less pain than I had endured for a long time. I still had started to resent working for Brian. I hated how he used me to get girls to surround him. I never said anything, though, and held my tongue when he asked how I was doing. I just smiled, as he wanted, and told him everything was fine.
It wasn’t until a night in September that I said anything to Brian. It was the same night that I found out the truth.
We had arrived to the event just as always, I think it was the Sportlight again. It was a popular venue in south Boston, everyone that was someone in South Boston hung out there. I had begun to remember people’s names, who they were associated with, who to look out for while running the random errand for Brian during the day. I had learned more than I ever would have expected in the business and Brian began to teach me
how to read a person’s expression and how to tell if they were lying. It would come in handy throughout the years and I was very thankful he had decided to teach me such things, even before what was about to happen.
After talking to one of the Wallace brothers, both Frank, Steve, and James, whom I could never keep them straight, I excused myself to use the powder room. I caught a glance at him before I went inside. He was already hitting on a new crop of girls. I rolled my eyes and pulled out my lipstick. As I fixed a smudge in the mirror, a tall older woman came in. She had beautiful red hair cut short as most did at that time. She pulled out her lipstick as well.
“I see that you came with Mister MacAuliffe,” she said. At first, I didn’t realize she was talking to me. Then her eyes flickered over at me in the mirror.
I nodded. “Yes, I did.”
She snapped the cap back on her lipstick and looked at me with her bright green eyes. “So tell me, what’s it like to be his whore?”
It took me a moment to process what she had said. Then I realized what she had accused me of, that I was like her and just wanted to get in his bed. I wanted to slap her. “Excuse me?”
“He pays you to come, does he not?” she let the words linger in the air, her voice sounding so sweet but her words so bitter.
Again, slapping her was my first thought. “I... No.”
“Well, that’s not what I hear. I hear that you do whatever he says,” she leaned in closer. “Satisfy any needs.”
“I’m not a prostitute,” I snapped back.
She shrugged, a sly smile still plastered on her fake face. “I’m just telling you what I hear. Why else would he want you around?” she spun on her heels and left me standing there in the powder room. Alone.
I glanced at myself in the mirror, my cheeks burning red. At that moment, I had so many questions running through my head, and a few not so friendly things to tell Brian and where he could put the gowns he bought me, including the shoes and the makeup. Taking a deep breath, I knew that would be a mistake and that I would probably be punished severely if I did say that. I closed the cap of my lipstick and hurried out of the powder room. Although I had calmed down a bit, I still needed some fresh air and to get away from the people who looked at me as Brian’s whore.