After Brittany left, Chenille grinned at her sister. “I am woman, hear me roar,” she said teasingly. “You’re going back to your maiden name? Good for you!”
“I have always hated the name Butrell,” Chiffon said as she dropped her car keys into a glass ashtray. “And I want a fresh start. I’ve even considered selling the house if I get it in the divorce settlement, which I’m sure I will, considering how public Lonnie’s adultery was. Maybe you and I could rent a place together? That is, if you aren’t going to run off and elope with Garnell.”
“Oh, that Garnell!” Chenille said, sighing contentedly at the mention of his name. “He’s such a sweetie. Did you know he bought ten calendars? That was more than anyone else. But I don’t think we’ll be running off to a wedding chapel anytime soon. I’m savoring our courtship. After all, I’ve never had one before. So, if you want, I’d love to share a place with you.”
“Great!” Chiffon said happily. “And now that Lonnie’s gone for good, why don’t I move the baby into my room and you take the nursery?”
“Are you sure? It would save me looking for a place to stay in the meantime.”
“It’s settled. I’ll start getting that room cleared out tomorrow.” Chiffon walked to the end table and mashed the blinking red button on the answering machine.
“Girls, are you there?” It was Wanda’s voice on the machine. “This is Mummy. Pick up the phone if you’re home.”
“Mummy?” Chiffon said in a puzzled voice. Chenille shrugged.
“Listen, girls,” Wanda continued. “I thought it might be fun to drive to the Augusta Mall sometime next week. We could have lunch in the food court, throw change in the fountain, or maybe poke around in JCPenney. Call me and let me know.”
“The olive branch has been extended,” Chenille said. “Augusta Mall used to be our favorite destination when we were in high school.”
“She’s lonely,” Chiffon said, deleting the message. “We’re the only people who put up with her. But I promise, nothing’s changed with her. As soon as we get to the mall, she’ll be saying, ‘Chiffon Amber, march right past Cinnabon. Do you know how many grams of saturated fat are in those rolls?’”
“True,” Chenille said. “And when we get to Penney’s she’ll criticize all the clothes I try on.”
The two sisters sat in silence.
“I suppose I should be grateful that she doesn’t want me to blow up to the size of the Hindenburg,” Chiffon said finally, rolling her eyes and looking at the ceiling. “Maybe that’s just her way of loving us. Even if it is twisted.”
“You’ll never allow her to go too far again. That’s the important thing.” Chenille settled herself on the couch and pointed the remote at the television set.
“I’ll call her tomorrow,” Chiffon said, plopping down next to her sister.
Chenille channel-surfed through a Power Juicer infomercial, a rerun of Bewitched, and a weeping evangelist. She paused on Catherine Zeta-Jones flirting with Billy Crystal.
“Do you want to watch?” she said. “Jay-Li’s up for the Oscar.”
“What the heck,” Chiffon said, leaning back into the cushions. “It could be kind of fun. You should hear some of the dirt Lonnie told me about her.”
“Bring it on,” Chenille said, leaning in closer.
“First of all, she has a person called a colon hydrotherapist on staff. She’s paid to flush fifteen gallons of water through Jay-Li’s insides.”
Chenille grimaced. “You’re kidding!”
“And once she threw a temper tantrum in her private jet just because her manicurist forgot to bring the cuticle cream. The pilot had to turn around.”
“Oh my,” Chenille breathed. “Speak of the devil. Here it comes, the award for Best Actress.” Russell Crowe stepped up to make the presentation.
Before the winner was announced, the camera panned on the faces of the nominees. Janie-Lynn gripped the arm of her seat, her hand sheathed in a long white glove. Even in her nervousness, she sparkled like a jewel.
“And the winner is,” said Russell Crowe, with a distinct Aussie accent, “Janie-Lynn Lauren for The Winsome Whistle-blower.”
Janie-Lynn broke into a spontaneous grin. She glided to the stage in a strapless gold gown, looking like a sparkling flute of champagne.
Once she was at the podium, her hands trembled as she gripped the statuette to her chest. The names of the people she wanted to thank came out in a babbling rush as if she were reciting a tongue twister. Then she paused for a moment, as a pearl-like tear skimmed her creamy cheek. In a sad little-girl voice, she said, “I’d also like to thank the dearest man in the world, Lonnie Butrell.” She lifted the statuette with a long pale arm. “This one’s for you, baby.”
“Oh my Lord,” Chenille said with a gasp. “Did you hear that?”
Chiffon stared at the television set, stupefied. “She’s got the Lonnie bug, and she’s got it bad.”
An ALLTEL commercial quickly replaced Jay-Li’s simpering visage.
“I almost feel sorry for her,” Chiffon said, clicking off the TV. “I know what it’s like to have your heart held hostage.”
Moments later the phone rang, and Chiffon glanced at her watch. “How much do you want to bet it’s Lonnie? Probably wants to gloat about having heard his name on national television.”
“What do you want now?” Chiffon demanded as she answered the phone.
The line was silent. Then a barely audible voice said, “Is Lonnie there?”
“Jay-Li, is that you?” Chiffon asked.
“Yes.” Her voice was a broken, jagged thing, lacking all the confidence of previous encounters. “I’m sorry to be calling so late, Chiffon, but I just wanted to talk to him. Just for a second. Did he see the show?”
“I saw it. You just won the Oscar. Congratulations.”
“Yes, I’m backstage now. Would you please let me speak with him?”
“He’s not here, Jay-Li,” Chiffon said, cupping the mouthpiece close to her lips. “He doesn’t live here anymore. We’re getting a divorce.”
“Because of me?”
Chiffon shook her head. “Nope. Not really. You were just one indignity among a heap of others.”
“How did you do it? How could you leave him?” Her voice came out as a desperate squeak. “He’s all I can think about. I’ve tried everything to forget him. I practically live at my analyst’s office, a Scientologist has cleared me, and I’ve had my aura purified. Nothing works. Not even winning the Oscar has distracted me.”
“You ever won any beauty pageants?” Chiffon asked.
“Beauty pageants? What does that have to do with—”
“Hear me out. A gorgeous woman like you is bound to have a pageant or two in her past.”
There was a pause on the other end. “I was crowned Miss Mung Bean,” Jay-Li said finally. “But that was years ago.”
“Miss Mung Bean? What kind of title is that?”
“The kind they give to girls growing up in small towns in Southern California,” Jay-Li said stridently.
“The title doesn’t matter, so long as they gave you a tiara and you kept it,” Chiffon said.
“Oh, hello, Harrison,” Jay-Li said, addressing someone on her end. “Thank you so much. Yes. I am delighted. And give my love to Calista.” She came back to the phone. “I’m sorry. You were saying?”
“Get the tiara, put it on your head, and remember what it was like to be a queen. A queen has no use for a man who treats her like mud on his shoes.” Chiffon caught the eye of her sister, who was listening, and winked.
“A queen knows she deserves better,” she continued. “Try it yourself, and see if it doesn’t work.” She set down the phone and went to join Chenille on the couch.
“That was sweet of you,” Chenille said. “Co
nsidering how horribly she treated you.”
Chiffon yawned. “Lonnie’s the kind of man who makes women behave badly. I ought to know.” She patted her stomach. “I’m getting kind of hungry. Any of those carob cookies around? The yogurt-covered ones aren’t half bad.”
“No, I threw them out,” Chenille said. “I’ve lost my taste for them.” A guilty look crossed her face. “I do, however, know the location of a secret stash of gummy bears.”
“What?”
“One night I couldn’t find anything to eat, and there they were in the pantry, so cute, so pudgy.” She hung her head. “I’m afraid I’ve grown somewhat dependent on them.”
“What about elevated blood sugar, rotting teeth, and all that other stuff?”
Chenille shrugged. “C’est la vie?”
“Well, don’t just sit there talking pig latin. Bring them on.”
Chenille scurried off and returned, victorious. She handed the bag to her sister, who pried it open with her teeth.
“I guess I’ll have to fight you for the red ones,” Chiffon remarked.
“Actually, I prefer the green ones,” Chenille said, holding out her hand.
“What?” Chiffon poured candy into her sister’s palm. “Nobody likes the green ones. It’s not even natural.”
Chenille daintily nibbled on a bear. “I guess that makes me one of a kind.”
Chiffon neatly severed a red bear in half with her teeth and smiled warmly at her sister. “Yes, it certainly does.”
About the Author
Karin Gillespie is national bestselling author of five novels and a humor columnist for Augusta Magazine. Her nonfiction writing had been in the New York Times, The Writer, and Romantic Times. She maintains a website and blog at Karingillespie.net. Sign up for her newsletter on her website, follow her on Twitter, or connect with her on Facebook.
In Case You Missed the 1st Book in the Series
BET YOUR BOTTOM DOLLAR
Karin Gillespie
A Bottom Dollar Novel (#1)
Welcome to the Bottom Dollar Emporium in Cayboo Creek, South Carolina, where everything from coconut mallow cookies to Clabber Girl Baking Powder costs a dollar but the coffee and gossip are free. For the Bottom Dollar gals, work time is sisterhood time.
When news gets out that a corporate dollar store is coming to town, the women are thrown into a tizzy, hoping to save their beloved store as well their friendships. Meanwhile the manager is canoodling with the town’s wealthiest bachelor and their romance unearths some startling family secrets.
The first in a series, Bet Your Bottom Dollar serves up a heaping portion of small town Southern life and introduces readers to a cast of eccentric characters. Pull up a wicker chair, set out a tall glass of Cheer Wine, and immerse yourself in the adventures of a group of women who the Atlanta Journal Constitution calls, “...the kind of steel magnolias who would make Scarlett O’Hara envious.
Read all about it and/or grab the book from Amazon
CLICK FOR BET YOUR BOTTOM DOLLAR
Don’t Miss the 3rd Book in the Series
DOLLAR DAZE
Karin Gillespie
A Bottom Dollar Novel (#3)
Cupid is running rampant in Cayboo Creek, South Carolina, and all the Bottom Dollar Girls have been struck dizzy with his arrows. When high school heartthrob Brewster Clark returns to town, both Birdie and Mavis are angling for his affections, threatening their long-term friendship.
Ever-so-proper Gracie Tobias meets Rusty the dreamy doctor of her dreams but soon discovers he’s actually a blue-collar duct doctor. Will their wildly different social positions drive a wedge between them? Meanwhile Elizabeth is trying to put the sizzle back to her marriage. Not even octogenarian Attalee is immune to love’s siren call. She gets engaged to beau Dooley and plans a wild bachelorette party and steamy honeymoon.
Traveling love’s rocky road keeps the Bottom Dollar Girls asking, “Is it ever too late for moons and Junes?” Through much laughter and a few tears the girls discover that the answer is a resounding no.
Read all about it and/or grab the book from Amazon
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GIRL MEETS CLASS
Karin Gillespie
(From the Henery Press Chick Lit Collection)
The unspooling of Toni Lee Wells’ Tiffany and Wild Turkey lifestyle begins with a trip to the Luckett County Jail drunk tank. An earlier wrist injury sidelined her pro tennis career, and now she’s trading her tennis whites for wild nights roaming the streets of Rose Hill, Georgia.
Her wealthy family finally gets fed up with her shenanigans. They cut off her monthly allowance but also make her a sweetheart deal: Get a job, keep it for a year, and you’ll receive an early inheritance. Act the fool or get fired, and you’ll lose it for good.
Toni Lee signs up for a fast-track Teacher Corps program. She hopes for an easy teaching gig, but what she gets is an assignment to Harriet Hall, a high school that churns out more thugs than scholars.
What’s a spoiled Southern belle to do when confronted with a bunch of street smart students who are determined to make her life as difficult as possible? Luckily, Carl, a handsome colleague, is willing to help her negotiate the rough teaching waters and keep her bed warm at night. But when Toni Lee gets involved with some dark dealings in the school system, she fears she might lose her new beau as well as her inheritance.
Available September 2015
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Henery Press Mystery Books
And finally, before you go...
Here are a few other mysteries
you might enjoy:
THE BREAKUP DOCTOR
Phoebe Fox
The Breakup Doctor Series (#1)
(from the Henery Press Chick Lit Collection)
Call Brook Ogden a matchmaker-in-reverse. Let others bring people together; Brook, licensed mental health counselor, picks up the pieces after things come apart. When her own therapy practice collapses, she maintains perfect control: landing on her feet with a weekly advice-to-the-lovelorn column and a successful consulting service as the Breakup Doctor: on call to help you shape up after you breakup.
Then her relationship suddenly crumbles and Brook finds herself engaging in almost every bad-breakup behavior she preaches against. And worse, she starts a rebound relationship with the most inappropriate of men: a dangerously sexy bartender with anger-management issues—who also happens to be a former patient.
As her increasingly out-of-control behavior lands her at rock-bottom, Brook realizes you can’t always handle a messy breakup neatly—and that sometimes you can’t pull yourself together until you let yourself fall apart.
Read all about it and/or grab the book from Amazon
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WAKE-UP CALL
Amy Avanzino
(From the Henery Press Chick Lit Collection)
Sarah Winslow wakes up with a terrible hangover… and a kid in her boyfriend’s bed. She makes the horrifying discovery that, due to a head injury, it’s not a hangover. She’s got memory loss. Overnight, five years have disappeared, and she’s no longer the hard-living, fast-track, ad executive party girl she thinks she is. Now, she’s the unemployed, pudgy, married, stay-at-home-mom of three kids under five, including twins.
As she slowly pieces together the mystery of how her dreams and aspirations could have disintegrated so completely in five short years, she finds herself utterly failing to manage this life she can’t imagine choosing. When Sarah meets the man of her d
reams, she realizes she’s got to make a choice: Does she follow her bliss and “do-over” her life? Or does the Sarah she’s forgotten hold the answers to how she got here… and how she can stay?
Available September 2015
DOUBLE WHAMMY
Gretchen Archer
A Davis Way Crime Caper (#1)
Davis Way thinks she’s hit the jackpot when she lands a job as the fifth wheel on an elite security team at the fabulous Bellissimo Resort and Casino in Biloxi, Mississippi. But once there, she runs straight into her ex-ex husband, a rigged slot machine, her evil twin, and a trail of dead bodies. Davis learns the truth and it does not set her free—in fact, it lands her in the pokey.
Buried under a mistaken identity, unable to seek help from her family, her hot streak runs cold until her landlord Bradley Cole steps in. Make that her landlord, lawyer, and love interest. With his help, Davis must win this high stakes game before her luck runs out.
Read all about it and/or grab the book from Amazon
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LOWCOUNTRY BOIL
Susan M. Boyer
A Liz Talbot Mystery (#1)
A Dollar Short (The Bottom Dollar Series Book 2) Page 25