“Syd, I…” Abby turned away and wiped her face.
Syd stepped toward her and placed her hand on the small of Abby’s back. “What’s wrong? Why are you crying?”
Abby turned to face Syd after she turned off the water that was filling the sink. “I was just thinking about what Gran said, that we never know how much time we have.” Abby wiped her hands on the dish towel and hung it back up.
“Do you want to talk about it?”
Abby gave her a watery smile. “Not tonight. I want us to enjoy the rest of our evening. I’m sorry about earlier, for leaving so quickly.”
Syd tilted her head in question. She wanted to talk about earlier, but she wasn’t expecting Abby to bring it up. “Why did you?”
“I thought you might kiss me and I freaked out.”
“I see. I’m sorry if I overstepped, and I did intend to kiss you, but I won’t again. I thought you might be attracted to me like I am to you.”
“Oh, Syd. That’s not the issue. You’re going back home in less than two weeks, so why don’t we just stay friends and work on cleaning out Virginia’s?”
Syd took a tentative step forward and wiped an errant tear off Abby’s cheek with the pad of her thumb. “Is that what we are? Friends?”
Abby barely nodded and licked her lips. Syd wanted badly to lean a little closer and claim Abby’s mouth, but she kissed her cheek instead, lingering a little longer than she probably should’ve. “Okay,” Syd said huskily. “Friends it is.”
Syd pulled her shoulders back and stood taller. Now that she knew it wasn’t because of Syd’s race that stopped Abby from kissing her earlier, her heart felt a lot lighter than it did just a few minutes ago, but still, it was a shame that Abby wasn’t looking for a little fun over the next couple of weeks. Syd certainly could have used the distraction and release from all the stress she’d been feeling over the past few days. “Where’s the silverware? I’ll dish out the pie while you get the coffee.” Syd took out Bernice’s piece of pie and coffee to her in the living room and returned with her own followed by Abby.
“Sydney, this pie is delicious. Do you get a chance to cook or bake often?”
“I do now that I work more regular hours. When I worked as an investment banker, I worked really long hours and I didn’t have much time for anything else. I would cook on the weekends and pack those meals up for lunch and dinner during the week.”
“You took your dinner to work?” Abby asked after she sipped her coffee.
“Yes. It wasn’t uncommon for me to leave the office around midnight. Working at the center, I still work late, but I get home at a more reasonable time.”
“What made you leave investment banking? You must have had to go to school for a long time to get in that field. Not that working with children isn’t important, but to go through all that college for nothing.”
“Grandma!” Abby exclaimed. “What’s with the third degree?”
Syd laughed and held up her hand. “It’s fine, Abby. I have my bachelor’s in finance and an MBA, all from the University of Illinois at Chicago. I did an internship at the firm I worked with up until a couple of years ago, and they were impressed enough to hire me after graduation. I worked very hard to get where I was,” she said proudly.
“My former firm had sponsored the youth center I’m with now in a city-wide athletics competition, and that was my first exposure to working with the kids. I began to volunteer on Saturdays, and I started to feel much happier when I was there. It wasn’t that I was unhappy where I was, but working at the center gave me a fulfillment that working in investments didn’t. I wanted to make more of a difference in the world, and I feel like I finally am. Although I’m no longer using my college degrees, they are something nobody can ever take away from me. Besides, they’ll come in handy again one day because I plan to open my own center.”
“That’s wonderful. I think it’s very important that we can do something we love, and we can make a difference in people’s lives. Abigail got her degree in creative writing from Iowa State. I’m very proud of my granddaughter.”
“I can see that, ma’am, as you should be. Abby has really helped me out this week, and I hope we remain friends,” Syd said as she smiled at Abby. The blush creeping up Abby’s face was adorable, and Syd fought hard to stay seated rather than kissing Abby senseless. It wasn’t too difficult of a fight though since Abby already told Syd her wishes. And what would Bernice think if she knew of Syd’s lascivious thoughts about her granddaughter? Time to make a break for it.
“Bernice, it was a pleasure to meet you and I’d like to invite you and Abby for dinner in a few days after I’ve gotten things a little more cleaned up around the house.”
Bernice surprised Syd by giving her a warm hug. “We’d love that, dear.”
Syd looked to Abby, who had her hands full with dessert plates. “Would you like help with those?”
“No, but thank you. Would you like my help again tomorrow?”
“I’d love it if you don’t have other plans.”
“No plans. I’ll be over after I’m done with my chores.”
“Great. I’ll see you then. Good night, and thank you again for tonight.”
Syd thought about her evening as she got into bed. Already she adored Bernice and looked forward to spending more time with her. More importantly, she looked forward to spending more time with Abby. It was going to be a long ten days trying to keep her libido tamped down around Abby, but she would respect her wishes and try to concentrate on getting this house ready to sell.
Chapter Eight
Syd was in the kitchen the next morning pulling a pan of banana nut muffins out of the oven when she heard a loud noise outside. She opened the back door to see a guy unloading a large dumpster next to the garage.
“Excuse me, I didn’t order this,” Syd said, although she had been meaning to.
“Abigail Price ordered it, ma’am,” the guy yelled over the whining of the motor.
“I thought I’d get this out here today since we’re making a lot of headway going through Virginia’s things,” Abby said as she walked up the driveway.
Syd turned around to find Abby smiling and walking toward her. When she stopped within a foot of Syd, she wanted to hug Abby for her thoughtfulness—and to feel Abby’s body up against her. Syd wasn’t normally so tactile with people she hardly knew, but she had a constant wanting to touch Abby anywhere and everywhere. She shoved her hands in her pockets to avoid making a fool of herself by making an unwanted advance.
“How much do I owe you?”
“Nothing. I’m taking care of it since you gifted us with the best apple pie we’ve ever tasted.”
Syd wanted to argue, but she couldn’t when Abby was so close to her that it made her want to do anything but argue. It made her want to take Abby into her arms and kiss her like she’d never been kissed then take her upstairs and have sex with her all day and all night. But not argue. “Thank you. And in that case, wait until you taste the banana nut muffins I just pulled out of the oven.”
Abby made herself at home in the kitchen by pulling out a coffee mug, placing it on the counter next to Syd’s empty cup, and filling them both. Syd appreciated how comfortable Abby seemed to be in the house.
They sat at the table, and the moan that came from Abby when she bit into the steaming muffin made Syd’s stomach flip over a few times. She watched Abby chewing slowly with her eyes closed. Syd wouldn’t mind sitting here all day staring at her. Hell, she’d bake a kitchen full of muffins if it meant bringing as much pleasure to Abby as she’d seemed to have at that moment. Syd cleared her throat and took a sip of the scalding coffee, hot enough to clear the images of her taking Abby in her arms and kissing her until they were both gasping for breath.
“I really appreciate your help, Abby. I’m sure you have other things you could be doing with your time.”
“Nothing pressing,” Abby replied as she smiled. “We can finish up in the garage, and if we have t
ime, we can work on another room in the house.”
Somehow, with Abby’s help, Syd didn’t feel as overwhelmed with all of the stuff she needed to go through. Abby would know what to donate, what to throw away, and what to keep. They resumed where they left off the day before after putting the trash in the dumpster. Box by box, they had added to the donation pile and to the trash, but the pile of items to keep hadn’t grown much. Syd opened a plastic bin and found many framed photos of her mother and grandparents. She pulled each one out and studied the photos carefully.
“What is it?”
Syd held up a photo of her mother when she appeared to be in her late teens. She had her arm around her father and both of them were laughing. “I just don’t understand, Abby. Look at them.” Syd showed Abby the picture. “I can’t believe this came to an end all because my grandparents didn’t want my mama marrying my daddy.”
“Are you sure that’s the reason?”
Syd looked up at Abby. “What do you mean?”
Abby shrugged. “Maybe your mother said or did something that upset your grandparents. I didn’t know your grandfather well, but I never heard your grandmother say a racist thing, and I spent a lot of time with her.”
Syd stood up so fast that it made Abby stumble back a few steps. Syd moved closer to Abby and pointed at her, her internal body temperature rising. “The only thing my mama did was fall in love with a black man. It’s not her fault that her parents couldn’t accept that fact, and I don’t appreciate you insinuating otherwise. You weren’t there. I was, and I saw how Harold spoke to my parents. He had no interest in meeting me or getting to know me because I was the product of an interracial marriage.” Syd wiped the tears off her face and ran into the house. She filled a glass of water and took sips in between the deep breaths to calm herself. How dare Abby blame her mama. She didn’t know her parents and how loving and accepting they are. Her mama would never say a hateful thing about anyone.
“Syd?”
She hadn’t heard the back door open or Abby’s footsteps, and she didn’t turn around when she heard Abby’s voice. “Go away, Abby.” She felt her tears return to her eyes and wiped them away. She was hurt but also embarrassed that she had lost control of her anger so quickly. The tears came faster when she felt Abby place her hands on Syd’s shoulders.
“I’m so sorry that Harold behaved that way, and I’m even sorrier that you didn’t get to know Virginia. After spending the past few days with you, I’m certain she would’ve been crazy about you. I wish you didn’t experience racism at all, but especially as a little girl, at a time when we’re full of innocence and joy.”
Syd turned, wrapped her arms around Abby, and cried into her shoulder.
Abby’s heart ached for Syd and she tightened her hold. She hadn’t experienced racism, but that didn’t mean she hadn’t experienced cruelty of some kind. Shortly after her parents died, she started school in a new town where she didn’t know any of the kids. Two little girls had befriended her, and while they stood by Abby, some of the other kids had somehow found out that she was an orphan and they made fun of her. Kids could be such assholes. Her two friends stuck up for her, and eventually the rest of the kids settled down until something else they could make fun of came along.
Abby did know what it was like to be different. She found herself kissing Syd’s temple and cradling the back of her head with her hand. She knew she shouldn’t be doing such an intimate act to Syd. Abby was the one who told her she just wanted to be friends, and Abby intended the kiss to be one of comfort, but when Syd lifted her head to look at Abby, and her eyes dropped to Abby’s lips, she couldn’t help herself from lowering her head and gently kissing Syd’s mouth. The kiss was chaste, and Syd made no further move to continue the kiss. Abby wasn’t sure if she was relieved or disappointed, but she knew she needed to step back and get some space between them.
“Why don’t I fix us lunch, and if you’re feeling up to it afterward, we’ll finish up the garage.”
Abby was grateful when Syd nodded and said she’d be right back. She made some sandwiches and cut up some fruit, and lunch was waiting at the table by the time Syd returned. She watched Syd fiddle with her napkin, anticipating that Syd had something to say, and she waited her out.
“I’m sorry I yelled,” Syd said as she continued to look down like a punished child.
Abby placed her hand on Syd’s arm and waited for her to make eye contact. “Apology accepted,” she said with a small smile. Abby was relieved when Syd picked up her sandwich and took a bite. She followed suit, and they eventually made their way back out to the garage. Abby stood by silently as she watched Syd take the box of pictures and place them to the side. Syd had remained fairly quiet over the next couple of hours with the exception of answering a question every so often. When they finished with the garage, Abby noticed the sun starting to lower and she had an idea.
“I think we’ve done enough work for today. Come on, I want to show you something.”
Syd didn’t say anything, but she followed Abby out of the garage and to a path that circled the pond on the property. They stopped at a bench on the east side to watch the sun set in the west. They sat there quietly with no other sound other than their breathing and crickets chirping. Syd sat ramrod straight with her hands on her thighs and Abby could feel the tension vibrating off of Syd. She reached out and placed her hand over Syd’s. She felt Syd flinch which only made Abby curl her fingers around Syd’s hands.
“Your grandmother used to come out here a lot. She said it was a scenic and peaceful place to reflect, especially when the flowers were in bloom and the sun shone on the water. I once asked her what she thought about when she looked like she was a million miles away, and she said her family. She didn’t expand and I didn’t press. When I would see her sitting in this spot, all I wanted to do was come sit next to her and be a source of comfort, but I never did. I wasn’t sure if I was afraid of intruding on her time or if she would shoo me away. I don’t want to make that same mistake with you, Syd. I’m here to listen if you want to talk about it. If you want to cry, I’ll be your shoulder. And if you just want to sit here quietly to watch the sunset, I hope you’ll allow me to join you and hold your hand.”
They sat there quietly as the blue sky turned into vibrant oranges, pinks, and purples. Abby startled when Syd began to speak.
“When I was four, my mama, daddy, and I traveled here from Chicago so I could meet my grandparents. I was so excited, I couldn’t sit still in the backseat.”
Abby grinned at the visual of a young Syd bouncing in her seat.
“Mama knocked on the door and Harold answered. He did not look happy to see us, and to be honest, he frightened me. He told us we weren’t welcome and he’d throw us off his property if he had to. I remember Virginia standing behind him, crying, looking like she wanted to say something. But she didn’t. She just stood there and watched us drive away. That was my first encounter with racism and I had no idea why Harold didn’t want us.”
Syd tilted her head until it rested on Abby’s shoulder. She lifted her arm to allow Syd to get closer, and Abby wrapped her arm around Syd’s shoulders, holding her tightly against her.
“Mama was so upset and she had to try to explain to her four-year-old child that her daddy didn’t want us because my daddy was black. How is a four-year-old supposed to understand that, Abby?”
Abby rested her chin on the top of Syd’s head. “I don’t know, sweetheart. It’s not something anyone should have to understand, and I’m so sorry you had to experience it at all, let alone as a child. I’ve never been able to understand why some people can’t look past the color of skin, or religion, or sexuality. Underneath it all, we all bleed the same color. We’re all human and we should treat each other with respect.”
As the sky turned darker and the silence ensued, Abby gave Syd one final squeeze and stood. “We better get back before we can’t see our hand in front of our face.”
Syd stood and reached for
Abby’s hand, threading their fingers. “Is this all right?”
Abby nodded and she squeezed Syd’s hand. As they reached the back door, Syd turned to Abby with their hands still linked. “Would you like to have dinner with me?”
Abby knew she should say no. She felt her affection and attraction for Syd growing the more time they spent together, but the idea of leaving now, when Syd looked so sad and vulnerable, had Abby saying yes. “Only if I get to help.”
* * *
After dinner, Syd and Abby refilled their wine glasses and sat in the living room. It had been an emotional day for Syd, and she should be exhausted to the point of not being able to keep her eyes open, yet she felt energized while she cooked with Abby. They moved about the kitchen like a well choreographed dance, passing each other while one removed the pots and pans and the other retrieved the food from the refrigerator. They resumed their dance after dinner when they cleaned the kitchen. Syd wasn’t used to sharing a kitchen with anyone, but doing it with Abby had given her pleasure. It was nice to have someone to talk to as she prepped the food.
Her home life was one of solitude because of her long work hours at the youth center. When she did have anyone over to her condo, it was usually just Vanessa or her parents. Her home was sacred to her in that it was the one place she could unwind with cooking, having an occasional drink, and reading. She didn’t want to disturb her space with people she wasn’t particularly close to. Even when she had sex with other women, it was always done at the other’s place, and she never spent the night. She usually met her friends for dinner or drinks, and sometimes dancing on Saturday nights, but she never invited them to her home. She wondered what Abby would think of her place. Would she love the views from her living room and bedroom windows? Would she like being in the city amongst the tall, crowded buildings and the throngs of people? Or would she feel caged in, not having the wide-open plains she was used to in Iowa? Syd wondered if Abby would want to come visit her in Chicago, and at that moment, she realized that Abby was becoming an important person in her life. Her thoughts were interrupted when she heard the clink of Abby setting her wine glass on the table.
A Call Away Page 7