‘Hey, Shaylee, wait up!’
I ignore Michelle and Kelly as they weave their way through the buzzing corridor toward me. After last night’s scene, it’s obvious that something is being kept from me and my frustration levels are too high for company right now. Something important has happened but the only answers I’m getting are: ‘it’s nothing to worry about,’ and ‘it’s just a little disagreement.’ It’s enough to make me scream.
‘Hey!’ Michelle grabs my shoulder, pivoting around to face me in the busy corridor, oblivious of the students who cluck their tongues in annoyance at the traffic jam we are causing. ‘Where are you running to?’
‘Kael’s waiting,’ I say, my lips set in a straight line.
‘We’ll walk with you,’ Kelly says.
Michelle puts both hands on my shoulders. ‘What’s up with you? You’ve been avoiding us all day.’
‘I’m just tired,’ I say, not quite meeting her eyes.
Kelly stops at my shoulder, ignorant of the questioning look Michelle is giving me. ‘Oh yeah,’ she says, ‘you guys were up early for your green meeting yesterday.’
I freeze and my eyes fly to Michelle’s face, which has suddenly paled.
‘Green meeting?’
‘Yeah, or whatever you call it. Must’ve been important. I drove past at six and the lights were already on.’
‘There was a meeting?’ I ask, directing my gaze at Michelle.
She looks helplessly at me and then at Kelly.
‘You weren’t there?’ Kelly asks, oblivious of the tension, ‘I just assumed since your grandmother is the chairperson...’
I ignore Kelly and focus on Michelle.
‘There was a Circle meeting?’
‘Oh yeah, that’s what you call it. Green Circle,’ Kelly says innocently.
‘Why wasn’t I told?’ I interrupt but Michelle just looks at me, her lips moving soundlessly like a fish out of water.
‘What did they discuss?’
‘I can’t…’
‘Was Kael there?’
‘Yes but – babes -’
Before she finishes her sentence, I stalk toward the entrance of the school.
There had been a Circle meeting yesterday? What is so important that it required an emergency meeting? And why am I being kept in the dark?
Kael is standing by the truck, leaning nonchalantly against the passenger door but he straightens when he sees me.
‘What the hell is going on?’ I demand.
‘What do you mean?’
‘Oh, cut the BS,’ I say, loud enough so that the group of seniors leaning against the Volkswagen two cars down glance curiously in our direction. ‘There was a Circle meeting.’
‘Keep your voice down, Shaylee.’
‘Why was there a meeting, Kael?’
He steps aside to open the passenger door and glances significantly in the direction of the seniors. ‘Get in the car and we’ll talk,’ he says in a low voice. I glare at him but acquiesce and slip into the car seat. He shuts the door and comes around to the driver’s side.
‘You need to learn to control yourself in public,’ he admonishes.
‘Stop avoiding the subject.’
‘I’m being serious, Shaylee. We can’t have people getting suspicious.’
‘Just answer my question, Kael,’ I say, twisting in my seat toward him, ‘Why was there a Circle meeting and why wasn’t I told?’
He is quiet for a moment, glancing once in my direction before he turns his eyes to the rearview mirror and backs out of the parking, into the street.
‘There were some things to discuss.’
‘What things?’
‘Things you don’t need to know about.’
‘Agh!’ I fold my arms and glower at him, ‘I know it has something to do with me.’
‘Not everything is about you.’
‘Then why are you trying so hard to keep me in the dark?’
He frowns but doesn’t take his eyes from the road.
‘I have a right to know, Kael.’
‘I’ll decide that.’
I clench my fists tightly in my lap and grind my teeth together.
‘What gives you the right to decide for me?’
Kael exhales loudly.
‘Do we really have to have this conversation again?’
‘Yes!’ I say, unable to control the anger in my voice.
‘Listen, Shaylee,’ he says, slipping into that no-nonsense tone I despise. ‘It’s my job to keep you safe and I’ll decide what you need to know in order to do that. You do not need to know what was discussed at the meeting. End of story. Drop it.’
I huff and turn my body in the other direction. I know it’s a childish reaction but I can’t help myself, I’m just so incensed. I absolutely hate being the only person who doesn’t know a secret, and the fact that this particular secret is most likely about me, makes it unbearable. There’s no way I’m going to just drop this.
If Kael won’t give me answers, I’ll just have to find another way to get them.
By the end of the afternoon, I’ve nagged my grandmother, surfed the internet and worked myself into a frenzy, thinking of plausible reasons for why the Circle meeting had been called. Had there been an attack? Did it have something to do with the fire? Am I in danger? I’m no closer to the answers but there is an unpleasant dread settling at the bottom of my stomach. Whatever the reason, it can’t be good.
With a groan, I reach up from my position on the window seat and throw the window open. I am immediately rewarded with a fresh breeze that drifts in, carrying with it the earthy scent of the forest. I inhale appreciatively and gaze longingly at the deep green treetops, glinting in the afternoon sunlight.
I yearn to be out there, beneath the trees, to feel the velvet bluebell petals between my toes. I wonder if I can find my old oak - the one I used to sit under for hours as a young girl. It had been my sanctuary then, and like the pot of violets on my bedside table, had inexplicably held the power to soothe me.
Kael’s voice plays over and over in my head as I stare out the window: ‘I’ll decide what you need to know.’ I look over the hedge in the direction of the Gregor house and impulsively, push the window wider and step out onto the nearest branch of the oak tree.
This time, it is a conscious decision. I’ll make sure I’m gone long enough to be missed. I’ll show Kael that I can make my own decisions. I’ll show him that he doesn’t need to know my whereabouts all the time. I’ll show him I don’t need a sulky baby-sitter. With a last, defiant glare in the direction of Kael’s house, I jump from the last branch to the ground and take off running into the cover of the trees.
Once I’m safely ensconced in the shadows of the forest, I stop and look up, trying to orient myself, then I start walking in the direction I think my oak tree lies. It’s been such a long time since I visited the tree and I’m not all that sure about my way there but something seems to be pulling me in one direction and I let my heart lead me deeper into the dense undergrowth.
The forest is still, the only sounds to be heard: the snapping of twigs beneath my feet, the occasional flutter of a startled bird and the gentle rustle of leaves overhead. I smell the delicious scents of primrose, violets, and damp earth and it fills me with an incredible sense of belonging.
My anger dulls as I walk, and I start to feel guilty, but I trudge on. I’ve come this far already, and I need to make a point. I’m not a push-over or a pawn for the Maor to use. It’s my life they’re dictating and I have a right to know about decisions that affect me. I have a right to make my own decisions.
When I reach the clearing and see the old oak in the middle of it, surrounded by a blanket of bluebells, I stop and drink in the sight of its wide branches, reaching toward the blue sky. Shafts of sunlight stream in through the gaps in the foliage; softening the dark shadows and making the bluebells beneath appear purple in some patches, blue in others.
I slip my shoes off and take a step into the cl
earing. The flowers fold beneath my feet and spring back as I move. It feels like I’m walking on air. Wherever the velvet petals touch my feet, my skin tingles and warms.
When I reach the oak tree, in the middle of the clearing, I run my fingertips over the gnarled oak trunk, feeling the roughness of the once familiar knots. I smile, turn to survey the clearing again and gasp.
The entire clearing of bluebells is bending toward me.
I drop to my knees in awe and reach my hand tentatively toward a fragile spray of flowers. They turn and curl into me, faces lifting, as if I were the sun. It’s like my pot of violets, multiplied a hundred fold.
I sink down beneath the oak, stretching my arms out wide on either side of me. The grass curls around my body, creating a natural cushion beneath me and the bluebells creep over me like a protective throw. I’m not afraid of the tendrils that twist around me like vines. Everywhere they touch feels like a caress and soon my entire body is humming. I close my eyes and breathe in, filling my lungs with the green scents swirling on the afternoon breeze, then I just lay there, listening to the gentle sounds of the forest preparing for nightfall, until my mind becomes hazy.
I come awake with a start. My heart is in my throat and I scream as a rough pair of hands hauls me to my feet. One big palm plasters over my mouth and I’m pulled around to face my captor’s green eyes. Some of my terror abates as I realize who it is but then I register the rage in his expression and I’m even more terrified than I was before.
‘What the hell are you doing?’ Kael says. He doesn’t shout, but his voice is simmering.
‘I j-just went for a walk,’ I stammer.
‘Alone in the forest. At dusk. Without telling anyone?’
I glance around, suddenly noticing how dark the forest has become.
‘I’m sorry, I guess I fell asleep.’
Kael glares at me, the muscle in his jaw working furiously. He looks as angry as he was the other night with Peter, maybe even angrier and there’s an eerie quiet to his voice that’s much scarier than a shout.
‘Sorry isn’t going to keep you alive, Shaylee,’ he clamps one hand over my upper arm and starts walking in the direction of Nan’s house.
His grip is painful, but I just stumble along behind him. My eyes burn and tears spill involuntarily onto my cheeks but he doesn’t notice. I think he’s using all his energy to keep his temper in check; his neck muscles look taut and I think I can even hear his teeth, grinding together.
By the time we reach the wooden porch at the back of the house, there are blue finger imprints on my arms and I am terrified. I thought I’d seen the worst of Kael’s temper the other night, but I was wrong. I shiver and cross my arms over my chest so he won’t notice my trembling. He pulls me around to face him and I force my chin up.
‘Are you trying to get yourself killed?’ he asks.
‘What’s it to you?’ I say. I won’t show my fear. If I give in now, what was the point of this whole exercise?
His eyes widen and he takes a step back toward the porch railing. He leans both elbows on the wooden balustrade and drops his head into his hands, raking his fingers through his tousled hair.
‘What is it going to take to get through to you, Shaylee?’
‘How about a little trust?’ I say.
‘Trust is earned, and you’re not doing a good job of that.’
I ignore his response and continue: ‘and how about the truth?’
His body stills and he whirls around and stalks back toward me.
‘Is that was this was about?’ he asks, voice low and dangerous. ‘You placed your life in danger, because I won’t tell you what we discussed at the Circle meeting?’
‘It’s my life, Kael!’
‘You think I don’t know that? It’s your life that I’m trying to protect.’
He reaches out to me and I flinch back. He pauses with his hands in the air and looks from his hands to my face and back again with something akin to shock. He drops his arms to his sides and sighs. It’s a heavy sound, full of defeat.
‘I’m not the enemy, Shaylee,’ he says. He walks toward the stairs, pauses with one foot on the top step and bends his head in a tired gesture.
‘I can’t fight you anymore,’ he says, and walks away.
Chapter 30
Stubborn
Tastes like: A walnut.
Smells like: Smoke lingering in curtains.
Sounds like: Persistent banging on a door.
Feels like: A hard, unyielding chest.
Looks like: A blood-stain.
I can’t fight you anymore.
Kael’s words from yesterday ring over and over in my head. I don’t know exactly what he meant but there’s a queasy feeling in my stomach when I replay our argument.
I desperately need someone to talk to about this and there’s only one person who might understand how I feel, so I pick up my phone and dial her number.
When she answers, sounding groggy from sleep, I realize that, while I’m getting ready for college, she won’t need to wake up for at least another hour.
‘I’m so sorry I woke you, my friend,’ I say immediately. ‘I’ll call back later.’
‘No, it’s fine, Shay,’ she replies quickly, ‘I’ve been wanting to speak to you. How are you doing?’
I sigh and twist a cotton thread dangling from the chiffon curtain around my finger. Now that I have Jenne on the other end of the line, I’m debating whether it was such a great idea to call her in the first place. We’ve chatted frequently since I arrived in Aylburton, but there is an awkwardness that has crept into our conversations lately. I think it’s all the unsaid things between us but I can’t exactly say: ‘Hey, Jen, guess what? I’m a fairy! And I have a bodyguard and there are vampires trying to kill me!’
‘It’s hard to explain,’ I say. I stare dejectedly out the window and realize, for the first time, just how alone I really am.
‘Oh.’ I can hear the disappointment in her voice. She exhales loudly. ‘Listen Shaylee, I need to tell you something.’
There is a pregnant pause, and she says: ‘I know.’
I’m silent for a second as my mind races to consider the possibilities of what she means. Does she know who I am? Does she know what I am? Have my parents said something to her?
‘You know what?’ I ask cautiously.
‘I know who you are,’ she replies, ‘I know about the Maor.’ I remain silent and before her words have a chance to sink in, she blurts out: ‘I’m sorry I couldn’t tell you before you left but -’
‘Whoa!’ I interrupt. My heart seems to stop beating in my chest and a thickness settles in my throat. ‘You mean, you knew before I left?’
‘Yes, but -’
‘You knew and you didn’t you tell me?’ I demand. ‘You knew how confused I was, Jen, why didn’t you just tell me the truth?’
‘They wouldn’t let me!’
‘Who? My parents?’
‘Yes,’ she says and there’s a hint of desperation creeping into her voice, ‘and my dad.’
‘Your dad?’ I ask. ‘What’s he got to do with it?’
‘Well he’s your doctor, isn’t he?’
‘Yeah, since -’ I stop short as a sickening suspicion enters my mind. ‘How long have you known?’
The long, tense silence that falls over the telephone line is enough confirmation to send my heart plummeting to the bottom of my stomach. I put my free hand around my middle and close my eyes. My world is falling down around me and the one person who was my anchor is…My eyes fly open and I ask, in a raw voice:
‘Oh my God, is that why you became my friend?’
‘No!’ Jenne says quickly. ‘It wasn’t like that, Shay!’
‘Then what’s it like, Jen?’ I snap. ‘Cause the way I see it, this entire friendship has just been one big, fat lie.’ Another lie to add to the growing pile that used to be my life. I feel the prick of tears and gulp them back.
‘No, Shay, no…’ Jenne replies, in a softe
r voice. She gives a deep sigh and continues.
‘When your parents arrived from England, they approached my dad for protection. He’s not just a doctor, Shay, he’s a witch doctor.’
‘As in, like, Tokoloshe’s and bones and stuff?’
‘I’m sure you know now that there’s more to the stories and myths than that,’ she says. ‘Anyway, my dad, gave you his mark of protection -’
‘What mark?’
‘The little bone-shaped one below your ear, Shay. It’s not a birthmark. It’s a mark of protection. It helps to tone down the energy of your aura and lets other super-naturals know that you are under the protection of a powerful person. Or should I say, you were protected…’
‘Were?’
‘Go look in the mirror.’
I tuck the phone between my right shoulder and ear and hurry into the bathroom, pulling my hair back as I walk. I tilt my head toward the mirror and gasp.
‘It’s gone!’
‘Yeah,’ she says, ‘you can’t really be under my dad’s protection if you’re on another continent, and besides, you have Kael.’
‘But, why couldn’t I just stay, under your dad’s protection?’
‘Even he isn’t that strong, Shay. Your aura just exploded after your birthday. Dad had his hands full warding off the predators even those few days before you left. He said you’re like a -’
‘- Beacon, yeah, Nan said that too. So,’ I shift uncomfortably on the window seat, ‘are you Maor too?’
‘No,’ she replies, and my heart sinks. For a minute there, I’d thought that just maybe, I wasn’t as alone as I’d thought after all. ‘I’m only half Shaman and the Shaman are different to the Maor in many ways. We aren’t responsible for the planet as you are, nor are we tied to it. Our ties are to our ancestors and traditions.’
‘So where do you fit in?’
‘Well, your parents needed someone to keep an eye on you at school, when they weren’t around, so -’
‘They asked you to spy on me.’
‘No, Shay!’ she insists. ‘I never spied on you. We’re best friends!’
‘Only because you had to get close to me.’
Five: A Maor Novel (Maor series) Page 16