by J. L. Drake
“Be careful. You’ll think he’s yours, then one day, poof, it’s all over. He’s out back hittin’ another pair of legs, and you’ll be left with a hole in the center of your chest.”
“Enough,” I hissed.
She kept walking until Brick was between them. “I just want a moment alone with the girl who won over Trigger…for now.”
Tess pressed her hand against Brick’s arm to let her pass. “I’m game.”
Fuck.
***
Tess
Melissa may have had three inches on me, but I was scrappy and knew how to fight dirty. I pointed my head in the opposite direction for her to start walking.
“No, Tess,” Trigger ordered.
“Don’t remember asking for permission.” I hated that he had a son with this bitch. It tore at my inner woman, the part that knew I would never give him one.
We walked a few feet away, and I angled her so I could see the guys.
“What?”
She eyed me up and down then reached out and touched my hair.
“I don’t get it.” She shook her head. “You’re such a plain little thing.”
I stayed strong. “But yet he loves me.”
She smiled darkly, her eyes in a slit. “But I’ve given him a son, the one thing you can’t ever do.”
It took me a half a second to absorb her fucking words before everything clicked, and I fisted a handful of her hair and yanked hard. My other hand swung around and smashed into her cheekbone.
Rage could be an ugly bitch, and this chick deserved it all. I grabbed her hair again and yanked her up, then put my face up to hers as I shook her like a rat. She just looked at me in disbelief as she screamed.
When I prepared to swing again, Trigger wrapped his arms around my midsection and hauled me back. I kicked at him, trying to get away.
“You stupid bitch!” Melissa yelled as she held her hand to her face. “You’re fucking crazy!”
“Me?” I wiggled out of his grip, but he caught me again. “Tell him the truth!”
“What?” Her eyes darted around for help.
“How do you know I can’t have kids?” I spat at her. Trigger’s grip loosened a little, and Brick stepped up with a confused look. “The only way you could is if your rat of a brother opened his mouth. Well, guess what, you little shit, I know some things about precious Officer Doyle that will bury his ass.”
“Melissa,” Trigger’s ribcage rattled against mine, “go the fuck home.”
“This isn’t over.” She spat at my feet, and I thrashed against Trigger’s grip to go after her, but he held fast. “Trigger, that kiss will hold me for now.”
Once she was out of sight, I pushed out of his arms and took a few steps away from him. I burned with the need to hit someone. I couldn’t look at him right now. I was so mad he hadn’t let me finish off that Easy-Bake Oven. I needed a moment to catch my breath and let the sting of her words taper off.
Just when you finally believe you’ve shed something from your past, it finds a way to come back and poke at your armor.
Trigger handed Brick a set of keys. “Take Morgan’s bike back to the club. I need your eyes there.”
“Yeah, okay.” Brick glanced at me.
What was I missing? Eyes on what? If Allen returned?
“You okay, Tess?”
I shrugged, unable to lie to my best friend, but I was sure as hell going to ask what the fuck all that was about.
A loud crack boomed all around us, and the sky lit up the black sea with a flash of lightning. It suited my mood perfectly. I hadn’t noticed the wind had changed or the heavy clouds that had rolled in. As we stood there, the heavens opened and poured down what I was feeling inside. I couldn’t help but sigh at the irony of the situation. Mother Nature was able to show what I couldn’t.
Brick hurried up to the parking lot, and Mud and his hippy friends started to dance around, embracing the flash storm.
Trigger’s hair stuck to the side of his head as we continued to stand there. Neither of us had moved. I hated how drawn to him I was. But the moment our eyes met, I wanted to cry. I knew it was for all the wrong reasons, but I was selfish and wanted every part of him to be mine.
“You wanna hit me?” he growled through the wind.
“Yeah.” It was the truth.
He held open his arms as if to say go for it.
I shook my head, unable to move. It wasn’t going to fix anything.
He took a step toward me, and I took one back.
“You said once you weren’t scared of me.”
“I’m not.”
He moved closer, and I matched to keep our distance even.
“You fight me at every corner. Where is that now?”
“With your son,” I blurted, and my body betrayed me as tears flooded my eyes.
He wavered in his step but continued to back me up until I was against the lifeguard hut.
“That bothers you?” His face flinched as he asked. “Bothers you that I screwed her in the parking lot of the club?”
I pulled back my arm and threw my fist as hard as I could into his cheek.
His face shot to the side, but he snapped it back with a dark smirk.
“She kissed me tonight.” He leaned in without touching me and drew in a deep breath through his nose as if to test my scent.
I hit him again, only this time I nailed him in the neck, a full throat punch. God, I hated him so much at that moment.
“Had her tongue in my mouth.” He seemed unfazed by my hit, which pissed me further.
“Stop.” I drew back for another punch, but he scooped me up and forced my legs around his waist. He took my chin in his hands, so I’d have to look at him straight on. He flexed his neck, and I felt the vertebrae pop as he relieved some tension.
“I don’t know what the fuck is going on, but I will find out.”
I was glad my wounds had opened and my tears flowed freely along with the rain. I could put up with a lot, but that one tore deep.
“Their games are getting worse.” I felt emotionally drained. “Makes me wonder what’s next.”
“Me too.” He shook his hair back off his face. “Let me take you home.”
I nodded.
The ride home was cold, and I was annoyed to see the bar was full of more club members. As soon as Brick caught sight of us, he rushed over and hugged me.
“Pack your bag. We’re heading out for the night.” He looked at Trig, who nodded.
I wanted to protest, but I was too tired to say no. Besides, I could use a little family time.
I welcomed his hug. “That sounds nice.”
“Good.” He turned me around and pushed me toward my room. “We leave in ten.”
The water ran into the marble sink in the bathroom. I stared blankly at it. My head thumped, and my stomach turned as I let my mind drift off.
“Please!” My scream tore at my throat as Allen punched another dent into Gus’s battered body. “I’m sorry. Please stop.” I tried to pull away from Zay’s tight grip.
“Actions have consequences, Tessa,” he purred and flexed his hand with a sick, sadistic smile. “Your body is young, and his is old. Where’s the fun in taking you on?”
“This is fun for you?” I hissed like a snake, disgusted with the man in front of me. “You want to hurt Trigger, you hurt me.”
“Stop, Tess,” Gus moaned from the ground. His face was barely recognizable, and blood lined his teeth.
I thought this might break me. I’d been through many things, but this nearly tore me in half. I knew I couldn’t let Allen see how much it hurt me to watch Gus being beaten.
“Hmm.” He stepped toward me and waved off Zay. He grabbed my chin and stared into my eyes. “Maybe I can see the appeal.” He leaned in and drank in my scent. I shuddered but didn’t back down. I was stronger than this. I had to be stronger. If the attention was on me, it wasn’t on Gus.
Zay made a noise like a protest but grabbed my arms, and Al
len’s lips were suddenly on mine. I bucked and tried to fight him off, but he was much stronger than I was. As soon as he pulled away, I spat in his face and heaved as my stomach turned in a violent roll.
Crack!
My face was hit with such force my ears rang.
“You ever deny me again,” he shouted, but he sounded a million miles away, “you’ll meet my weasels.” He smacked their cage and made them scream with a high-pitched squeal. “Or maybe dear old Gus should warm them up for you?”
I held in the flinch when I saw Gus’s expression. It was pure horror.
That brought me back to the present. I let out a weighted sigh.
A movement behind me caused me to look up. There was Trigger in the doorway, gaze locked on me, and the lines between his eyes were deep.
He pushed off the doorframe and stood directly behind me, his chest to my back.
His hand slid into my shirt and rested over my heart, and then he leaned in and kissed my neck.
“Stop worrying.”
I understood that he wanted to make me feel better, but it had the opposite effect. Instead, I just squeezed his hand and slid out from under his hold. I grabbed my bag from the bed and walked out of the room.
He wouldn’t get it. He wasn’t there.
Outside, I handed Brick my bag, and he strapped it on the back of his bike.
“Ready?”
“Where are we going?”
“Not far.” He grinned and waited for me to climb on. I hesitated, but I knew Trigger would be okay with me riding with Brick. After all, he was my brother. I tapped his side to let him know I was good to go, and we pulled into the quiet street.
Soon, our feet dangled from the rooftop as the city buzzed below us, unaware of our presence. I dipped a chip in the guacamole and popped it in my mouth. Brick hummed as he finished off his beer and opened another. He checked mine and replaced it as well.
“Never thought we’d be here,” he muttered from behind the lip of the beer.
“On top of an old movie theater, with beer and chips?” I joked darkly because a part of that was true. We had spent many a night hungry, looking for a safe place to sleep, but we always managed. There had been the odd rooftop.
“No.” He looked over at me. “Never thought we’d have secrets between us.”
I squeezed my eyes shut as I felt the guilt. “Secret. Not plural.”
“Maybe not in the beginning, but they grow, like a snowball, whether you mean for them to or not.”
“I just didn’t want you to take the blame.”
“If I did, would that be so terrible?” He looked hurt. I always thought I was protecting him, but now I realized he needed to be needed.
“I relapsed, went back to Clark, and got pregnant,” I blurted before he could respond. I knew if he stopped me, I wouldn’t have the courage to go on. Brick’s face smoothed into stone, but he remained silent. “I couldn’t stand to see your disappointment, so I stayed.” I felt like I might be sick. “Then, mommy dearest and Clark found out, and one night they tore it from me.” His expression turned horrified, so I rushed on. “They did damage, and now I can’t have kids.”
“Tess—”
“No.” I took his hand and gave it a squeeze. “Honestly, there’s nothing to say anymore. It’s over. I told you I never really wanted kids, so it’s not like it was a big loss for me. It’s just…” I fumbled to find the right words. My whole body seemed to need to shed some of the heaviness inside.
Brick leaned over and wrapped his arm around my shoulders and tugged me over to his side.
“It’s just what?” he encouraged me.
“It just would have been nice to have had the option, you know?”
“I know.” He kissed my head, and we stayed like that for a while, watching the lights twinkle.
“Trigger never told you?”
“No.”
I couldn’t help but be happy about that. He had kept his word.
“See that garbage can down there?” He pointed.
“Yeah.”
“You ever keep secrets from me again, I stuff you in there and frame Rail.”
I laughed and kissed his cheek.
“I love you, Matt.”
“I know.”
Chapter Ten
Trigger
“You stare at her like you’re mind-fucking her from across the room.” Peggy snatched my plate from in front of me. “It’s pathetic.”
“What’s pathetic,” Rail lit his cigarette with a smile, “is you’ve done everyone in here and you’re still single.”
Brick waited for her to leave before he leaned across the table. “It’s been a week. Where the hell is she?”
“Doyle set the whole thing up.” Rail flicked the ash off the table. “He’s protecting the little slut.”
“I wonder if Allen ever saw what was on the USB,” Brick said, deep in thought, “or if he helped Clark get the videos.”
“I think he’s seen them…” I trailed off, remembering what Zay said. He knew about File 33. I hadn’t shared that knowledge with the guys, as I promised Tess I wouldn’t. “Which means Allen has the same leverage we do.”
“It would explain why he was after it.” Brick nodded. “He wants it because he’s not on it. He wants it because he wants the power.”
I rested my hand on the table to stop the conversation when Cooper came in and went directly to the bar. Both Rail and Brick stared at me, and I shook my head. No questions.
“More?” Tess asked Rail with a bottle of whiskey in her hand.
She had been slightly off ever since the beach. Brick never mentioned how their night went, but I assumed he knew everything now. She was still here and hadn’t run off back to old habits, so that was a good sign. I hoped.
“Trigger.” Big Joe handed me an envelope. It read To the parents of Denton March. “It’s the third one this week. Thought I’d give this one to you instead of the junkie.”
“Why do you have it?” I asked while I eyed the school’s seal.
“Den tossed it in the trash when he got home yesterday.”
I gave a tight nod, and he went back to his post. I ripped the seal and plucked out the paperwork.
Fuck.
“Everything okay?” Tess stood next to me.
“Where’s Denton?”
“In his room,” Morgan called from behind the bar. “Been in there since school.”
“Have him meet me in the ring.”
“Yup.” Morgan rushed off, and Tess stepped back as I stood.
“Trigger, what’s going on?”
I leaned down and kissed her lips roughly before I left to go deal with my nephew. I stormed down the hallway, stripped down to my shorts and sneakers, and started to warm up. Denton arrived shortly after, and I pointed for him to join me.
He knew he was in some kind of shit.
After an hour of sparring, I held up my arms and watched Denton squint through the sweat that poured down his face. “Again.” He jabbed my hand, but I moved, and he missed. He shook off his exhaustion and took another swing but missed and tripped forward.
“My arms hurt.” He winced.
“That’s not pain. That’s your body working out. Fight through it.”
“Why?”
I hooked my right arm and clipped his shoulder. His face shifted and showed me his next move, so I jumped out of the way.
“I’m done.” He tossed his gloves off and started to step out of the ring, but I shoved his shoulder and punched him square in the nose.
He looked startled and began to cry. He looked at me, all hurt.
“That didn’t feel good, did it? We got a meeting with your principal tomorrow at ten a.m. Now get yourself cleaned up.”
I dropped my gloves and left my nephew to deal with the impact of what had just happened.
Kid had to learn sometime.
***
“Move it.” I shoved Denton’s shoulder as he walked into Principal Barrett’s office.
She looked up from her desk, and her mouth fell open like a trout when she caught sight of Denton’s black and blue swollen face. I noticed she didn’t close the door all the way, and it wasn’t lost on me that the security guard stayed in the outer office.
“Good heavens!” Her eyes shifted to mine, and I saw her shoulders tighten. She cleared her throat and motioned for us to sit. I was entirely too big for the chair, but I somehow managed to stuff my body into it. What was it about schools that they always had the same smell? Fuck.
“Mr. Vineyard,” her voice was meek, a major turn-off, “we have a total hands-off policy here at Santa Monica Elementary. Denton cannot be using his fists on other children. Just last week he punched Tommy Daloca right in the eye, and the week before that, Paul Perry received a punch in his tummy. I’m not sure what is happening at home, but I need…”
She stopped and glanced down at Denton’s file, and I saw what she saw. My name on the form. She pulled her yellow sweater closed over her blouse and pressed her hand to her chest.
“I’ve done all I can do with Denton. I know there is a ‘delicate,’” she finger-quoted at me, “situation regarding his mother, but this behavior must stop. I hesitate to say our only recourse will be expulsion.” She swallowed hard as I stared at her.
Fuck me. I rubbed my head and took a moment to think.
“Has the kid shown you any disrespect?” She shook her head. “Has he disrespected any of his teachers?”
“No. He hasn’t.” She glanced at Denton and shook her head again.
There was a long stretch of silence as I mulled over her answer. I turned to Denton. “Look at me, kid.” He did as he was told. “Do you think any of my guys would disrespect me?”
Den gulped and shook his head emphatically.
“Why do you think that is?”
“Because you’d kill them.”
The principal gasped.
“Did you think you deserved that punch I gave you yesterday?”
Principal Barrett’s eyes bulged, and she put a hand to her face to cover her expression.
“No,” Den shook his head, “I wasn’t ready for it.”
“Right. Felt pretty bad, didn’t it?” Den teared up, but I didn’t care. He needed to learn. “You want respect, you gotta earn it, kid. You don’t throw your weight around, and you don’t hit people unless they deserve it.”