by J. L. Drake
“New?” I pointed to the tip that was held between his fingers.
“Nope, just wanted something a little different tonight.”
“Why?”
He glanced over at me with his bright green eyes. I could see the moon reflected in them.
“This isn’t something I thought I could do.”
“What, sit here with me in silence?” I joked.
“Fall in love this hard.”
My lungs felt sucked dry. Trigger didn’t share emotion. I almost didn’t know what to say. I shook off the discomfort of sharing our feelings because this was, after all, what I wanted. I needed to know I mattered more to him than anyone, and I wasn’t just an easy lay. Trigger made me want even more.
“Peggy’s out,” he continued.
“I’ve heard that before, you know, about Tammy, but she still came back like a damn alley cat in heat.”
He half smiled before he ghosted the dark sky with white smoke.
“And look where she ended up.”
“True.” I snagged the joint, needing something to do with my hands. “Is she really gone?”
“Yeah,” he nodded, “Ryder packed her shit up and left it on the back step this morning.”
“How was she?”
He shrugged. “You care?”
“Yeah, I kinda do.”
“She was pissed, but that was because Rail chose some interesting words about her leaving.”
“I totally missed all the good shit.” I laughed, relieved the nasty tramp was finally gone.
We sat in silence for a while longer, our bodies molded to the side of the hut. The sea breeze kissed my cheeks with salty spray, and it left a sticky coating over my skin. Some people hated that feeling, but I loved it. For me, there was nothing like the ocean to calm my head.
“Why do you put those sticky markers all through the books you read?”
I pulled my mind away from the waves and repeated what he said to myself.
“Ah, you mean Savi’s story?”
He nodded.
“Reasons.” I was glad it was dark. I felt my cheeks heat.
“Which are?”
I knew he wasn’t going to let it go. Trigger liked to know why I did things, especially if they were odd or unusual to him.
I tried to think about how to explain in a way he’d understand.
“Reading is personal, and certain scenes will make you feel a certain way. I like the way I feel when I read them, so I mark them. When I feel down or just want to feel something in general, I go back and read them again. To me, it’s like reuniting with an old friend.”
“Huh.” He moved to sit a little straighter. “I read some of them.”
That completely blew me away. “Why?”
“I wanted to know.”
“Okay.” I felt my neck join in on the blushing. “What did you feel when you read it?”
“It was a romance thing.”
“Yeah.” I sat up to see him better through the darkness. “But how did it make you feel?”
“I didn’t feel much. I hardly do. But I maybe understand Cole a little.”
Wow, I never thought I’d be here having this conversation with Trigger.
“How so?”
“He loved Savannah when he knew he shouldn’t.”
I wondered how much he had read to get that. Maybe more than he would ever say. I couldn’t help but like that he said that, that he even picked up on it. I swung my legs over the edge to let them dangle and let my hair fall forward to act as a barrier between us.
“Are you saying you shouldn’t love me?”
“Yes,” he said roughly.
“Fuck me, Trigger, if you took me here to tell me that, then you really will give me a complex about Peggy.”
He moved so one leg was behind my back while the other joined my legs that hung off the edge.
“I’m also saying I’m not someone you should love, but like Cole, I don’t care. Call it selfish.” He leaned in close and brushed his lips against my bare shoulder. “You make me see Nolan.”
I turned my head to look at him. His face was inches from mine.
“Do you feel him?” I pressed my hand over his chest.
“Yeah,” he whispered.
“You like that?”
“Yeah.” He held still.
“How does it make you feel?” I sounded like a fucking therapist, but I wanted to know.
“Makes me feel human.”
I felt the corners of my mouth rise. “I make you feel human?”
“Yeah.”
I huffed with happiness from deep down in my throat. “That’s a really nice thing to say.”
He leaned in and gently kissed my cheek.
“You mentioned earlier that this was the place where you knew. What did you mean?”
He shifted closer. His body was wrapped around mine now.
“Remember when we hid in here from the Serpents?” I nodded and wiggled in closer to steal his warmth. “The next morning, when I sank the last body, I turned around and caught you flipping over the bloody rocks.”
“Ha! Yeah.”
“Most chicks would have freaked and run, or stood and watched. You helped.”
“Equally fucked up, remember?” I grinned, and he let out a huff of amusement. I waited a beat and went with the truth. “I helped to protect you.” I thought I should clear that up.
“Why?”
“Maybe I knew too,” I whispered.
He shifted back, but then his chest returned to warm up the cool spot he made.
“The MC rules are if you’re with us, you’re with us for life.”
“Okay.” I wasn’t sure what he was getting at.
“Are you with us?”
I hesitated for a moment, but when he opened his hand, I nearly fell forward. A huge black stone rested in the center of a black band lined with miniature black diamonds.
“I’ve got a jacked-up life and a seriously dysfunctional family, but you came in and made your mark, not just with me, but with everyone.”
I couldn’t find the right words, or maybe I was in shock, but he kept going, so I stayed quiet.
“You and I are different. We’ve learned to turn off and not feel, but you sparked something that was dead in me.” He paused when he took my left hand in his. “You got no choice but to marry me, Tess.” I pushed my finger through the ring then turned to grab his neck and pulled his lips to mine.
I twisted without breaking our kiss and straddled his lap. My mind fired off a hundred different emotions, but the one that stood out the most was that Trigger just confessed he needed me as much as I needed him.
“Say it, Tess,” Trigger muttered between our kiss.
I grinned when I recognized a moment I couldn’t resist.
“Not until you flip.”
His eyes flickered with need, and in a blink, I was tossed on my back, and he was tearing off my clothes.
“Yes!” I screamed when he plunged inside me.
***
Allen
“She what?” I backhanded him across the face. “Don’t lie to me.”
“I’m not.” He stood with his head down. “Happened three days ago.”
I glanced at Zay, who looked like he was about to murder someone. He had his black gloves on as he screwed the silencer onto the end of his gun. He just needed me to say the word, but I wanted to be the one to kill my son, not him. He had lust, but I had rage. Rage always won.
“And Gus?”
“Better. He’s up walking around. Things seem back to the way it was.”
“Good.” I rubbed my forehead and thought about my next move.
“When does school get out?”
His face fell, but he cleared his throat when I glared at him.
“You know the boys are my next move.” I grabbed his Devil’s Reach cut and held him to my face. “When does the youngest get off school?”
“One fifteen.”
I smiled and rough
ly tapped his cheek, “Kids are never off limits.”
“I thought you wanted the girl?”
“I did, but since you failed to deliver, I have now changed targets.” I rubbed the jagged scar Gus had given me before I beat his ass to a bloody pulp and left him for Trigger. “The boy will be painful for Tessa, and that will be her payback for leaving.”
“He’s just a kid.”
“And I’m just a man trying to gain back what was rightfully mine.”
“Fucking sick. Am I done here?” he muttered.
“For now.”
He glanced over at Zay with a grim look before he left.
“Zay,” I watched my mole slam the door behind him, “make sure he doesn’t get soft and tip anyone off.”
“Gladly.”
“Zay.”
“Yeah?”
“Just the boy for now.”
“Sure, for now.”
Chapter Thirteen
Trigger
“I appreciate you meeting me here.” I pulled the chair out and took a swig of the cold beer he had ordered me.
“Interesting location.” Mike looked around at the restaurant I had chosen. It was a dive, but it was lowkey, and I knew most who of those who came and went.
I shrugged. “I know the owner, so we won’t have any surprise visitors.” Plus, I knew Mike didn’t like being seen at my club. Cole had a hard enough time with it, so I didn’t need to cause more shit for him.
“Why do you seem different?” He squinted at me. “You seem less stressed or some shit.”
I wasn’t about to share what happened with Tess and me. That was private. But what I did want to share was a long time coming. I never wanted the Devil’s Reach to follow in my father’s footsteps because that would mean the boys would have to follow after me. Nothing good came from dirty deals, so the fact this shit was over meant one less chain strapped around my chest. I pulled out a stack of papers and tossed them in front of him.
“What’s this?” He studied the top sheet then looked up at me. “A coke deal?”
“A voided cocaine deal,” I corrected. “As of last week, the Devil’s Reach will no longer be under the Serpents’ hold.” There was a sense of pride to my tone. I hated that I had been tied to the Serpents, but hated even more that it had been my father’s deal.
“Wait,” he leaned back with a smile, “you’re not running drugs anymore?”
“I’m not saying that. I’m saying the deal is over.”
“I can’t say that was the answer I was hoping for, but it’s progress.”
“Next deal will be my way, none of this middleman shit. The product goes in and out clean.”
“There’s nothing clean about running drugs, Trig.”
I couldn’t help but smirk. He was right, but this was who I was, and he knew it.
“Well, fuck. That’s great, man.”
I downed more than half of my beer and felt the noose release a bit.
“Feels like I regained some control.”
“I bet.” He smiled and hit his bottle to mine. Mike always accepted me, and I always appreciated it. “Happy to hear it.”
Mike stayed for another hour and filled me in on his family. I could tell he needed to shoot the shit, so I let him have at it before I headed home.
“Stop,” I warned Rail, who had worn a stupid-ass grin for the past few days.
“Stop what?”
“I’ll snap your fuckin’ neck.”
“Nah, you won’t.” He laughed as he downed his third beer. “You lost your balls slappin’ that ring on her finger.”
“I assure you, he still has balls.” Tess winked and let her gaze float down to my crotch.
“Tess, you’re like that chick,” he snapped his fingers trying to recall the name, “you know, that rich dude with the,” he closed his eyes, “gray tie on the front.”
“Fifty Shades?” She laughed.
“Yeah, you’re like Ana, and you snagged the billionaire.” Her mouth dropped open. “Only you snagged a MC pres and get to deal with crazy-ass fuckers trying to kill us.”
I was lost. “What the fuck are you talking about?”
“Fifty Shades of Grey,” they both said.
Tess held up a hand to stop my next question. “Rail, at what point were you going to tell me you read romance?”
He grinned proudly. “You never asked.”
“How…” She paused. “How would I know to ask you that?”
“Meh.” He shrugged.
“Rail, we could be reading together.”
“Is that what’s in the locked trunk at the end of your bed?” Brick asked as he sat next to Tess and gave her a kiss on the cheek. His Cheerios sloshed onto the table, and I had to resist the urge to look away. His obsession with beer and cereal was disgusting.
“That and many other things.” He winked at Tess, and I gave him a kick in the shin.
“Yeah, and a fuckin’ blow-up doll,” Gus huffed behind me and squinted at his watch.
“Her name is Misty, and you didn’t mind her last night.”
“I wouldn’t waste my time with a blow-up doll when I have my own version high as a kite on my fucking bathroom floor right now.” He glanced at the door. “Anyone see Fin?”
“Ryder should be back soon,” I assured him, but he was right. They were twenty minutes late.
“All right, boys,” Tess stood, “I need to run to the store as soon as Ryder comes back.”
“Tess,” Big Joe came rushing over, “if you’re heading to the store, can I put in an order?”
“Sure.” She made a face when Cray came in with his newest prospect, Bruce. “Does he ever run his own club?” She laughed, and Brick pulled her back into the seat.
“Trigger,” Cray offered a nod, “I need to speak with you.”
“Yeah.” I stopped when his prospect eyed me strangely.
“Nice to meet the famous Trigger.” He offered his hand, and I just stared at him.
“Is it true that you don’t try your own coke?”
What the fuck kind of question was that?
“No.” Big Joe stepped in.
“Why not?”
“He only has one interest.” Joe cut Brick off. “The blonde.”
Tess knocked over Brick’s Cheerios, and she just looked down at it as the slop poured over her lap.
“Tess, shit.” Brick pulled her stunned body up from the chair. “You’re soaked.”
She turned toward me. All the color had drained from her cheeks.
She eyed me, and I moved toward her to make a show of helping her out. “Come on, Tess.” I tugged her toward the bedroom. “Let’s get you undressed.” I laughed as we headed down the hall.
“Look at me.” I forced her to look into my eyes. “What the hell is it? I know something shocked you back there.”
“It’s him.”
“Him, who?”
“The mole! The fucking mole!”
I covered her mouth and leaned in. “I know.” Her eyes jumped around as she tried to follow me.
“How do you know?” Her words were muffled under my hand, so I dropped it away and let her sag against me.
“You know when I was charged for that mass murder at the Final Temptations Strip Club in Santa Barbara?” She nodded. “He asked me to go there as a favor to help out a buddy. I was set up, I know it, but I haven’t done anything about it. I had to get my head around how to deal with it. It won’t be long now.”
“Holy shit,” she huffed. “I can’t believe it was Joe!”
“Morgan saw him kill Links too.”
“The guy you had working to get you out of jail?” I nodded. “Seriously?” Her hands drew into fists as she thought. “How is he not dead? Trigger, you don’t let anyone do anything, but Joe’s still here with a fucking heartbeat.”
“I needed to find Gus.”
“Well, now we have him!”
“I know, but I also need to find my father. I need that traitor bastard alive rig
ht now. He’s our frickin’ ace in the hole. The fact that my father trusts him will be the key to hunting him down.”
She shook her head and rubbed her arms. “I trusted him. He looked after me when you weren’t around. I just can’t believe it.”
“I know.” I felt her pain and knew it was really personal, but sometimes things had to play out differently than you wanted.
“He gave me a gun. I should have used it on him.” Her head snapped up. “Does he have any idea you two know?”
“No. He’d be gone if he did.”
“So, now what?”
“Now,” I pulled her off the bed and urged her toward the door, “you get cleaned up and act the same as you did before you made the connection.”
Both hands slammed down on my chest. “Trigger, it was Joe. Joe! It was his voice I heard in the desert before I got attacked. I knew it was familiar, but—Oh, it was him and someone else.”
I licked my dry mouth and tried like hell to channel my anger. I’d never wanted to kill someone as much as I did in that very moment. The demons screamed and shook their cages at the betrayal.
“Go get changed, Tess. Take a few to get yourself under control. You have to do this for me, for all of us.”
***
Tess
“Seventy-six even.” The salesclerk bagged up the rest of the food while I swiped the card. He eyed me a couple of times before he handed me my last bag. I was sure he knew who I was. The Devil’s Reach wasn’t exactly a lowkey club. “Receipt?”
“No, thanks.”
“Have a nice day.”
I waited an extra beat before I shot him a kind smile. “You too.”
See? I’m nice.
“Here, let me help you with that.”
I didn’t have to turn to know who it was. I froze, a surge of adrenaline raced up my spine, and my blood ran cold.
“I don’t need your help, Zay.”
“You all right, miss?” The clerk stepped away from his register and came around to the front.
Zay turned and gave him a look. “She’s fine.”
“Are you?” he asked me, and I tried to muster up another friendly smile. I didn’t want him to get hurt, but I knew he could tell I wasn’t.