“In a rush?”
Caleb is suddenly leaning against the locker next to mine. I’m disconcerted by the close proximity but dismayed to realize it doesn’t bother me. I don’t feel the urge to flinch back the way I did when Ryan adopted a similar posture.
“Yes,” I reply. “Here to rescind the lessons already?” I make the mistake of looking past Caleb, and see his circle of friends are all staring at us. Wonderful.
“Nope,” Caleb responds cheerfully, and I refocus on him.
“So . . . this is just a social call?”
He laughs. “No. I wanted to give you this.” He hands me a few sheets of paper that are stapled together neatly.
“What is it?” I ask, shutting my locker door and taking the papers from him.
“Our English outline. I added some stuff we discussed during our sleepover.”
I give him a sharp look for that comment, but my irritation fades when I flip through the first couple of pages. It’s more than an outline. He’s basically written our entire paper in bullet point format. “Wow. You didn’t have to do all this.”
He shrugs. “It didn’t take long.”
I’m pretty sure that’s a lie, but I let it slide. I’m distracted by Madison walking past with a couple of friends. She gives me a spiteful look. It’s more venomous than usual, and I have a feeling it has a lot to do with the guy a foot away from me. Caleb notices, and I look back to see his brow has furrowed.
“We used to be friends, you know,” I tell him for some unknown reason.
He looks at me with surprise. “You and Madison?”
I let out a little laugh. “Yeah. Her thirteenth birthday was just a couple days before my dad . . . died. It was a pool party. I got her a sparkly headband. It sounds lame now, but it was the cool trend at the time.”
“What happened?” Caleb asks quietly.
“Life. High school.” I shrug. “She cares what people think. I’ve never had that luxury.”
“What do you mean?”
“People judge me for things I have no control over. Kind of takes the sting out of it. Maybe it was just bad timing, but I think high school has a funny way of turning friends into foes no matter what.”
“Yeah, maybe you’re right,” Caleb says softly.
“I’ve got to go,” I tell him. “I’ll see you around.” He said he would text me about batting lessons, but I don’t know if he actually will. Don’t know if I really want him to.
Caleb nods, but doesn’t move from his casual pose. I start down the crowded hall, feeling his eyes on me the whole way. I’m sorely tempted to turn around and meet those brilliant blue orbs.
But I don’t.
THIRTEEN
__________________________________
The incessant beeping is getting to me.
“I forgot to grab rice,” I tell Gramps, which is actually true. “I’ll be right back.” I duck out of line to head back into the main section of the supermarket. It doesn’t take long to find the correct aisle and grab the light blue bag. There’s only one grocery store in town, and Gramps and I have been coming here every Saturday for as long as I can remember.
Gramps has moved up to being second in line by the time I return to the check-out. I toss the rice in the cart and try not to wince as the scanner keeps beeping nonstop.
Finally, it’s our turn, and Gramps chats with the owner as she rings up our groceries.
“I’m going to put these in the truck,” I tell Gramps, grabbing two paper grocery bags and heading towards the door. He nods as he continues making small talk with the cashier. I spin around to push open the door with my back. When I turn back around, I’m standing on the sidewalk just outside the store. Face to face with Caleb Winters.
We stare at each other as we contemplate what to say. Or not to say. At least, that’s what I’m doing. “Hi,” I greet. I definitely didn’t expect to run into him outside of school, especially following his unexpected offer to help me pass gym and our conversation at my locker. The gesture and talking to me in public added another layer to our already complicated . . . something. Not a friendship, definitely not a relationship, but something more than nothing.
“Hi,” Caleb repeats. All I can see on his face is surprise. Unlike me, he’s not alone. Jake Barnes, Colt Adams, and Luke Evans all hover behind him. Jake looks confused; Colt and Luke amused. “Exciting weekend?” A small smirk forms.
“Thrilling. Can’t you tell?” I nod to the two paper bags I’m clutching to my chest.
“Yeah, it’s pretty obvious.” Caleb’s dimples deepen.
“You?” I reciprocate.
“It’s been all right,” he responds.
“Winters! We’d better go,” Jake calls. He, Colt, and Luke have started to drift down the street, and are now standing about ten feet away from us.
“I’ve got to put these in the truck, anyway,” I say. “I’ll see you on Monday.”
Caleb doesn’t acknowledge Jake. Doesn’t look away from me. “Do you want to come?”
“Come?” I echo, floored.
“To the movies. We’re headed there now.” He jerks his head to the left, silently indicating towards the cinema located a couple blocks further downtown. His voice is casual, as though he invites me to hang out all the time, when the reality is the exact opposite.
I gape at him, temporarily incapable of speech. “I can’t,” I finally manage, a bit surprised to realize I don’t have to feign the note of regret in my tone. Spending time with him no longer seems like the punishment I once would have considered it to be. “I’ve got to—”
The door behind me clangs open and shut, and I turn to see my grandfather emerging from the store, carrying two more paper bags. “Gramps,” I admonish. “I was coming back for those.”
“I can manage a couple bags,” he informs me, before his gaze moves to the group of people standing in front of me.
Or at least one of them. “Well, hello there, Caleb.”
“Hello, Mr. Matthews,” Caleb replies respectfully.
Gramps shakes his head ruefully. “I thought I told you to call me Earl.” I don’t miss the glances Caleb’s friends exchange following the revelation he’s met my grandfather previously. In a town as small as Landry, it’s rarer to not know someone than to know them. But Gramps and I don’t exactly frequent the benefit and gala circuit where most of the local socializing takes place.
Caleb smiles. “You did, sir. Earl,” he tacks on hastily when my grandfather gives him a sharp look.
“Better,” Gramps praises. “Very sorry to hear about your grandfather.”
“Thank you,” Caleb replies.
“What are you boys up to?” Gramps asks, shifting his gaze from Caleb to his posse.
“We’re headed to the movies,” Caleb replies. “I was just seeing if Lennon wanted to come.”
I know what Gramps’ response will be even before I catch a glimpse of his delighted expression. “You should go, Lennie.” I glare at him.
“What about all the groceries?” I protest weakly.
Gramps waves off my concern. “I can handle it. There’s only a couple more bags to grab.”
“We can help.” Caleb doesn’t hesitate to offer up his assistance, and I survey his friends’ expressions with amusement as he offers theirs as well. Which is how I end up watching all four of them load our groceries for the week into the back of the old farm truck. I kind of expect Gramps to take advantage of the opportunity to strike up a conversation about baseball with four of Landry High’s starters, but he departs as soon as the truck is filled. Probably eager to set off before I can come up with an excuse to leave with him.
“This better not be a horror movie,” I inform Caleb as we head back towards the sidewalk.
“I thought you’d come around on those,” he replies. “Aren’t we doing Frankenstein for our paper?”
“That’s a book, not a movie,” I inform him. “Plus, I wasn’t about to spend all of lunch arguing with you about other
options.”
We reach Luke, Colt, and Jake.
“You look really familiar. Have we met before?” Jake asks as we start walking in the direction of the movie theater down the street. He gives me a cheeky grin.
“I assume you’re referring to the fact that we’ve gone to school together since kindergarten, Barnes?”
Jake laughs. “Yeah, that’s probably it.”
I roll my eyes. I’m trying to act casual as we walk along the brick sidewalk, but it’s a challenge to pretend like this is anything normal. Hanging out with Caleb is bizarre enough, but at least the last few years of animosity have established some familiarity between us. I can’t recall the last time I spoke to Jake Barnes. The only time I’ve talked to Colt Adams was when he approached me at Marcus’ party. And Luke Evans barely bothered to acknowledge my existence when he stopped to talk to Will after the basketball game. Even before my family drama made me the school pariah, these were never people I was friendly with. Walking down the sidewalk now, it feels like I’ve stumbled into some bizarre alternate reality where I’m friends with four of the most revered guys in school. It’s a thoroughly jarring shift after the comfortable, infamous solitude I settled into freshman year.
The movie theater is bustling with activity when we enter it. It’s a dreary, overcast day, and there are few forms of entertainment in town during the winter months to begin with. The cinema is also connected to an arcade and a diner, making it a veritable mecca for everyone to congregate.
After we buy tickets for some spy thriller, the boys all decide to get snacks from the concession stand. I opt to stay in the lobby, claiming I ate lunch just before Gramps and I went shopping. I really just don’t want to spend my paltry pocket change on overpriced candy.
Leaning against a wall watching others buy their tickets gets old fast, so I wander into the arcade area. I haven’t been in here since middle school, and I’m surprised by how nostalgic I feel looking around at the flashing lights and listening to automated trills. The air hockey table was always my favorite, and it’s empty right now. I send the puck flying into the opponent’s goal for old time’s sake.
“Lennon?” I turn to see Will standing a few feet away, with Marcus Freedman beside him.
“Hi, Will,” I greet. “Marcus. How’s it going?”
“Not bad,” he replies, giving me his usual friendly smile. “You here playing some air-less air hockey?”
I smile. “Yeah, I guess I am.”
“Are you here alone, or . . . ”
“Oh. I, uh, I—” I stammer and stall, trying to figure out how to respond. Will may be nice enough to pretend otherwise, but I know he’s aware I’m barely perched on the first rung of Landry High’s social ladder. There’s no easy explanation for why I’m here with those comfortably situated at the top. Partly because I don’t understand it myself.
“You and I have very different definitions of staying in the lobby, Matthews.” Caleb joins the conversation.
“I got bored,” I reply, internally cringing as I see Will’s wide eyes bounce back and forth between the two of us. “I’ll see you around, Will.” I give him a small smile, and then turn to head back to the lobby.
“Masterson’s got it bad for you,” Caleb comments, falling into step beside me. There’s an odd, almost disgruntled note to his voice. Maybe it should bother me that he sounds . . . jealous?, but it’s actually kind of flattering considering he has girls hanging all over him wherever he goes.
“Yeah, I know.”
I feel Caleb’s eyes on me as we enter the theater lobby. “And he thinks there’s something going on between us now.”
I sigh before I glance over at him. “Better than false hope, right?” Caleb raises a brow. “Have you ever known you should want something, but you just can’t make yourself want it?”
Caleb shakes his head. “No. I’ve just wanted something I shouldn’t.” There’s a husky note to his voice I’m not expecting, one that sends shivers skittering up my spine. We reach his friends, and it disappears from his voice. “Okay, let’s go.”
“Did you try to make a break for it, Lennon?” Jake teases.
“Obviously not, or I wouldn’t be back here,” I reply. “It’s not like Caleb would have bothered to drag me back here if I really had tried to leave. It probably would have been a relief to him.”
Colt looks highly amused by my response for some reason. “Good luck, Winters.”
Caleb rolls his eyes. “I wouldn’t have invited you if I didn’t want you to come, Matthews. Hurry up.” He starts walking down the carpeted hallway that’s lined with movie posters and smells strongly of buttered popcorn.
“Winters is weird about missing the previews,” Luke informs me as we all struggle to keep up with Caleb’s brisk strides. “God forbid we just arrive on time for the movie we actually came to see. We have to be embarrassingly early like we’re here for the senior discount special, or something.”
“Yeah, he used to watch movie trailers in History last year.” The words are out before I’ve thought them through, and Colt gives me a weird look. Wait, why do I know that? Why did I remember that?
Despite Luke’s complaints, the movie theater is already pretty full when we enter the dark auditorium. Not just with the elderly. I trail behind my four companions, watching the quartet of butts—I mean, boys—climb the stairs. Even in the dim lighting, it’s not the worst view.
They don’t stop until they’ve reached the very top row of the stadium-style seating, and I’m embarrassed to realize I’m a bit out of breath. I didn’t think baseball players did much cardio.
“Nice of you to finally join us.” Caleb smirks, and I flip him off. I reached the top of the stairs only a few seconds after he did.
“Ladies first,” Jake says, holding his arm out like a game show host presenting the winning prize. Only instead of a brand-new car, I receive the gift of having to shuffle past all four of them down the row.
There’s some whispering at the top of the stairs, and then Caleb is the one to walk down the row and take the seat next to me.
“You draw the short stick?” I mutter.
“Yup. They’re making me share my popcorn with you, too.” He holds the container of butter drenched kernels out to me.
“I don’t like popcorn,” I lie.
“Then why did you eat some at lunch last week?” Caleb counters.
I raise both eyebrows. “Why do you know what I ate for lunch last week?”
“So I could catch you in a lie when we went to the movies this weekend.” Caleb says sarcastically. “Just take some, Matthews.”
I cave and scoop up some of the salty, buttery snack. “Thanks,” I murmur begrudgingly. I finish the handful before the movie has even started.
“Here.” Caleb holds out the bin of popcorn again, and this time I don’t bother to argue with him. I scoop out some more popped kernels eagerly. Except this time, Caleb goes to take some at the same time I withdraw my hand. His palm grazes against my knuckles, and it suddenly feels like I’ve been holding the back of my hand out over an open flame. I react immediately, hastily yanking my hand back into the sanctuary of my seat as though I’ve just been burned. Because it feels like I have.
The movie finally starts, and I focus every ounce of my attention on the massive screen, acting as though the film featuring a hunky actor I vaguely recognize along with a lot of guns and gore is all that matters in the world at this moment. I try to actually pay attention to the plot, but the back of my hand still sizzles. I’m also excruciatingly aware the tall frame silhouetted in the seat next to me belongs to Caleb Winters. There’s an unfamiliar, unwelcome awareness that prickles in my belly when I realize the darkness makes it seem like there’s no one else here besides the two of us.
I keep my eyes trained on the screen in front of me, trying to appreciate the high-definition picture of a man’s torso being displayed onscreen as the love interest tends to the hero’s cut shoulder. But even washboard abs can’t
distract me from the fact Caleb is sitting only a few inches away. I listen to him munch popcorn. I watch him bounce his knee. I feel his elbow bump my bicep when he shrugs out of the hoodie he was wearing.
And . . . damn it, I’m attracted to Caleb Winters. I’ve always known he is objectively good-looking. Even at the height of my hatred for him, I’ve never been able to deny that. But I’ve also never been one of the girls who lost their train of thought around him. Thank god we’re in a crowded theater at the moment, because I’m no longer certain that would be the case right now. I feel giddy, being this close to him. There are actual butterflies colliding with my intestines as they flutter around my stomach.
The movie ends, and I’m about as clueless as to what it was about as I was before it started. Thankfully, no one asks for my opinion as we exit the auditorium. Jake and Caleb are engaged in some heated conversation about one of the stunts, and I completely tune them out.
“Hang on,” Jake says as we approach the lobby. “That slushy ran right through me.”
He ducks into the men’s restroom, and I take the opportunity to escape for a moment as well. “I’ll be right back.”
I walk through the doorway marked with a stick figure wearing a dress, and then take a sharp right to head down the hallway lined with stalls. I lock myself in the first one that’s available and tap my head against the plastic door three times, hoping it will knock some sense into me.
Nope. The memory of sitting so close to Caleb in the pitch dark still causes goosebumps to rise on my skin.
I wash my hands and then head back down the hallway towards the exit. I’m just about to round the corner to re-enter the hallway when I hear Colt’s voice. I pause in place. “—think it’s adorable you had to use her grandfather to trick her into spending time with you.”
“This is the sort of shit I’d expect from Jake, not you,” Caleb’s voice responds. “Come on, you saw how we happened to run into each other. She’s writing that article on me, and it’ll just be easier if we try to get along. It’s not a big deal, okay?”
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