by K. M. Scott
Shaking his head, he knitted his brows and frowned. "No. I don't want you to think that. It wasn't you. It was me."
"Oh, the old It's-not-you-it's-me thing," I joked.
He reached over and touched my hand resting on the edge of his desk. His eyes told me he didn't think this was a joking matter. "I hate to think that before your accident you thought it was because of anything you did that we broke up."
I didn't know what I'd thought then, but he was right. Ever since Jordan told me what had happened, I'd been convinced Cal had cheated on me because of some lack in me. That whoever he'd chosen over me was prettier, smarter, or better at whatever else he wanted.
"It's okay, Cal. I can't remember that now. It's just nice to know that what happened wasn't because of some deficiency in me."
He grimaced at the word 'deficiency.' "I'm sorry that you thought that. That's not right. You were lacking nothing, Nina. I was the one lacking in maturity."
We sat there quietly for a long moment before a knock on his office door broke the awkward silence. Calling the person in, he quickly shook off the seriousness of his words and put on his professional face again. As he and his coworker spoke, I stood to leave, having gotten what I'd come for.
His colleague left, and Cal stood from behind his desk. "Would you like to have coffee sometime? It would be nice to be friends, if you think we can."
"That would be nice. I can't promise I won't want to ask more questions, though. Everything's such a blank from around that time. But I don't want you to think I blame you for anything. That was a long time ago, and we've both moved on."
"It's the least I could do, Nina. And don't worry about blaming me. I deserve it. I just hope we can be friends."
I extended my hand to shake his. "It's a deal."
"Good." He wrote something on a piece of paper and handed it to me. "Here's my cell number and email. I'd love it if we could grab a coffee before the holidays."
I took the information with a smile and slipped it into my purse. "Me too. I'll email you and let you know when I'm going to be in the city again."
"You still live in Brooklyn? I heard you and Jordan were sharing an apartment in Sunset Park."
His mention of my place in Brooklyn surprised me. I shook my head and said for the first time to anyone since I left the hospital, "No, I live upstate now in Duchess County."
Cal's expression showed his surprise. "You introduced yourself as Nina Edwards, so I thought you were still single. Did you marry?"
"No. I'm still Nina Edwards, but I live with my boyfriend out there. Tristan. Tristan Stone."
I had the sense that the mere mention of Tristan's name changed everything in the room, and Cal's smile seemed to fade just a little.
"You did well for yourself, Nina. Stone's a big deal."
I nodded, unsure of what exactly Cal meant. Turning to leave, I smiled and said, "We'll do coffee before Christmas. Thanks again, Cal. I appreciate you taking the time to talk to me."
As I opened the door, Cal said quietly, "Take care, Nina. I look forward to seeing you again."
My talk with Cal had buoyed my spirits. I'd been so afraid that he'd left me because of me that I hadn't wanted to give Tristan a chance to do the same thing. Now I felt like I could truly let him in and begin to make those new memories, just as he'd promised.
Chapter Ten
Tristan
Looking down at my phone as it buzzed against the top of my desk, I saw a message from Jensen. Driving home now. After waiting for nearly an hour to hear from him after his first message telling me Nina had left Macy's and gone to an office building four blocks away, my stomach was tied up in angry knots. The bodyguards who followed us at all times were little help too. All they seemed to know was that she'd gone to the fifteenth floor to some insurance company to see someone named Cal Johnson.
Just seeing that name come up on my phone made my blood run cold. Three little letters and I could barely contain the rage that exploded inside me. Cal, the guy she remembered while I was a stranger. Cal, the ex-boyfriend who had broken her heart. What the fuck could she want with him?
Swiping away Jensen's message, I dialed another number I knew would help me find out what Nina had been up to. A few rings and finally I heard the raspy voice of Daryl Knight.
"Daryl, I have another job for you."
"Tristan. Just the man I wanted to talk to. I finally got something on that Edwards business. We should meet."
Daryl Knight was the man I used to investigate private matters associated with Stone Worldwide, such as researching the actresses' backgrounds to make sure there was nothing unsavory in their pasts before I was seen with them in public. A big, burly guy, he looked more like a mountain man than a private investigator with his full reddish-brown beard and wild curly hair. At first glance, he hadn't seemed to be someone who could find out much of anything without getting noticed, but he'd proven me wrong enough times that I knew if I wanted the details about someone, Daryl was the man to call.
"Fine. Let's say two days from now. In the meantime, I need you to find out everything you can about a man named Cal Johnson."
"Is Cal his real name?" Daryl asked with a chuckle.
"I have no idea. I just know I want everything you can find on this guy."
"Okay. I'll have it for when we meet. You looking for this for business or personal use? You know I don't care and it's none of my business, but do you want me to focus on the gorier details?"
"Both. I want to know where he lives, what he eats, how he makes his money, who he's fucking and if she likes it. You understand me?"
"Got it. What time are we meeting?"
"Thursday at noon."
I ended the call, pushed my phone away in disgust, and leaned back in my chair. I had to hold myself back from racing home at a hundred miles an hour to ask Nina why she'd lied and snuck off to some office where her old boyfriend spent his days.
Jealousy coursed through my veins, and my stomach turned at the thought of her with any other man. In my mind, I saw her naked body sprawled across his desk as he fucked her next to his low budget sticky notes and dollar store stapler. He wore a cheap suit and feared being found out, so he didn't even take his shirt off. Muffled grunts came from his mouth as he rammed his cock into her, his middle manager features all twisted into an ugly sex face while he hovered over the woman I loved.
Over and over, the awful scene played in my head until I couldn't take it anymore. I couldn't just sit there in my corner office torturing myself all afternoon. Pressing the intercom on the corner of my desk, I called for my assistant.
Michelle opened the door to my office and stood waiting for my instructions. The last showing of the ugly movie of Nina cheating on me played in my mind, and I heard Michelle say, "Mr. Stone? You wanted me?"
I shook away my thoughts and focused on the woman in front of me. In many ways, Michelle reminded me of Nina. Gentle and sweet, she cared about her job and me, always making sure every detail was taken care of for every assignment I gave her. Slightly older than Nina, she had dark brown hair, brown eyes, and was married to some advertising guy whose main claim to fame was the semi-successful campaign for some Greek yogurt made here in the States before every yogurt maker in the business began doing the Greek thing. I vaguely remembered her referring to him once as Jeff or Jess and saying they lived in Queens.
"Yes. I'm leaving, so cancel any meetings I have this afternoon. Message me if anything comes up that I need to know about."
"Yes, Mr. Stone. Should I call a car for you?"
Shaking my head, I stood from my desk and slipped back into my suit coat. "No. I'm taking my car."
"What should I say to Mr. Dreger if he calls?" she asked as I walked toward her to leave.
Karl would surely be calling if he got a sense that I'd left the office. The man had basically taken to stalking me since he'd found out about Nina, which had necessitated the two bodyguards who followed Nina and me around whenever we went out, an
d Nina whenever she was alone.
"Tell him I chose to work from home today. If he presses you for details, tell him you know nothing more and have him call me directly."
Michelle smiled and stood aside as I opened the door. Remembering Karl's penchant for trying to sneak around behind my back to spy on me, I added, "And lock this door when I leave. Do not let anyone in."
She looked at me with surprise in her eyes, but I knew she understood what I was telling her. "You can trust me, Mr. Stone. No one will get in."
"Thank you, Michelle. I'll message you if I'm not coming into the office tomorrow. If I don't, the same thing applies. No one gets in. No one."
"I understand. Have a good night," she said with a sympathetic smile, likely sensing there was something wrong but never asking since we weren't that close. She wished me a good night anytime I left the office, and rarely had I made the effort to say it back to her.
For some reason, the way she was looking up at me at that moment made me want to say it now, though. "Have a good night, Michelle."
My simple effort was rewarded with a broad smile, which made me feel better until I thought of Nina smiling just like that for Cal as she left his office, her light brown hair and her clothes all disheveled from her time with him. Disgusted, I turned and stormed out to get into my car, eager to take my aggression out on the highway between Manhattan and home.
Jensen was outside the garage when I pulled up to the house. I parked the Jag and saw he wasn't there by coincidence. He was waiting for me.
"Mr. Stone, I want to apologize. I neglected my duties and Miss Edwards could have been harmed."
Jensen's mouth turned down in a frown as he stood waiting for me to respond to his confession. While Nina might not remember anything of the recent past, he did and he knew I did. After the attack on her at the apartment by that guy fucked up on whatever drugs he was on, I'd been clear with Jensen that if she was hurt again, it would mean his job.
But she hadn't been hurt, and now that the bodyguards were always around, I didn't expect Jensen, a man in his fifties, to do the work of younger men.
"She wasn't hurt, so we're fine. In truth, the bodyguards I hired are there to protect her more than you are. I still expect you to keep your eyes open for anything suspicious, however, so letting her give you the slip today is a problem."
He hung his head. "I know. I shouldn't have listened to her when she said she was meeting her friend to go shopping. I'm truly sorry, Mr. Stone."
As furious as I was, it wasn't directed at my driver. He was merely someone caught in the middle, and there was no point reaming him out. Reaching out, I patted him on the shoulder. "It's fine, Jensen. No harm, no foul. Just don't let it happen again. I rely on you."
He looked up at me with tired eyes and nodded as relief began to wash over him. "Thank you."
"Where are West and Varo? I want to talk to them too," I asked as I looked around for any sign of them.
"I believe they're around back. They arrived right after we did."
"Okay, relax, Jensen. If Nina and I go out tonight, I'll be driving, so unless something changes, you have the night off."
I followed the brick pathway around the back of the house and across the property to find the bodyguards and hear what they knew about Nina's afternoon adventure. Both men stood near the carriage house where they stayed after my firing of the gardener. Large and bulky, they were exactly what I wanted in the people protecting Nina. They had a bouncer look to them, but as long as they did their job, I didn't care what they looked like.
They stood talking to one another, and a twinge of embarrassment pinched at me as I thought about what I needed to ask them. I suddenly felt like a goddamned fool.
"Gentlemen, I want a report of what happened today."
I spoke with as little emotion as possible, hoping for a matter-of-fact tone to hide the anger and jealousy that continued to churn in my gut. It was bad enough that I knew Nina had gone to see her ex. Having to hear these two tell me the details of it was nothing short of painful.
West was the more talkative one, so he spoke up first. "Miss Edwards left Macy's by a different door than the one she entered through and walked four blocks to an office building on West 39th. She entered the building and rode up to the fifteenth floor to the Peak International offices, an insurance company. She met with a man named Cal Johnson for about twenty minutes and left, returning to the car to ride home."
Talkative for West meant doing the Joe Friday thing—just the facts and little else. He even had that uptight cop look. I was going to have to ask for details.
"Did she look like she'd been harmed? You better hope the answer is no, gentlemen."
Varo, the younger of the two men, shook his head silently, his piercing dark blue eyes staring at me as if he knew what I was getting at, as West continued his report. "She looked the same as when she entered the building, sir. Hair and dress were exactly the same. In addition, she didn't look upset. She looked just as she always does."
"And the person she met with?" I asked with my heart in my throat.
"Average height and athletic build. Brown hair and neither of us noticed the eye color. He seems to be some kind of insurance salesman."
"Did she see you following her?"
Both men shook their heads, and Varo answered for the first time. "She never sees us. She's not looking for us, so we're not seen."
Nothing in what they'd said should have added to my unhappiness with the whole situation, but their answers hadn't helped me feel better either. I waved them away as I walked toward the house to face the final person in this whole affair.
Unfortunately, Rogers was waiting in the foyer, yet another person I had to deal with before I got to Nina. I was definitely not in the mood for his thoughts on my love life at that moment, but his expression looked almost pleasant.
"What do you want, Rogers? I'm in a hurry."
"Just to ask if dinner was to be served at the usual time."
"No. Nina and I are going out."
Rogers nodded slowly. "As you wish."
Behind him on the table in the center of the foyer lay an envelope. It was the same kind I used for her letters and had my name written on the front of it.
"Where is Nina?"
"In her room, I believe."
My hands shook at the thought of what she may have written in the letter. Was this her way of breaking the news to me that she and Cal were back together? Just the idea made me feel empty, like I'd lost everything important to me. Snatching the note from the table, I left Rogers standing there with his semi-smiling face and hurried to my room.
I sat down on the edge of the bed, the note still in my hand. Every time I'd written to her had been to express something I couldn't say to her face—something that was dear to me but I couldn't get out in person. Was it the same for her this time? She'd never shied away from telling me exactly how she felt, so why begin now?
All these questions raced through my mind as I looked down at that white envelope with her handwriting on it.
I wasn't letting her go. It didn't matter what the letter said. I wasn't giving Nina up. Cal couldn't have her back. He didn't deserve her. I didn't even know what he'd done, but I knew he didn't deserve her. Maybe I didn't deserve her either, but at least I loved her. I loved her and I wasn't going to give up on her.
The envelope wasn't sealed and the flap lifted easily, so I slid the letter out and unfolded it. The paper felt heavy in my hands, as if it was a two ton weight I was holding. My eyes focused on the first words, and I began to read.
Dear Tristan,
I didn't think it was fair that you had no letters from me, so I chose this way to say what I have to say. I realized today that even if I knew nothing about you except what I've come to know in the weeks since meeting you in the hospital, I'd know that I'm the luckiest woman in the world. I can't wait to go to our favorite restaurant tonight!
Yours,
Nina
I thr
ew the letter on the bed and raced to Nina's room, overcome with relief from what she'd written. My heart slammed against my chest with excitement as I marched down the hallway to her room, and I stopped short at her door to calm myself before I charged through it like a mad bull. Taking a deep breath, I knocked and pushed the door open to see her sitting on her bed as if she'd been waiting for me.
"Hey, what's up?" she asked sweetly. "Did you get my letter?"
Her smile lit up the room, and I walked to her bedside to pull her into my arms. All the anger and jealousy that had churned inside me for hours disappeared when I held her, as if she was the lone antidote to all my misery.
I kissed her hard on the mouth, not wanting to hold back anything I was feeling for one of the first times since she'd come home. She was my Nina, and I wanted every part of her for mine.
She pulled away and looked up into my eyes. "Tristan, are you okay? I thought you'd be happy with my letter."
Cradling her face in my hands, I kissed her again, softer this time. "I was. Very happy. I liked that you wrote me something."
"Then what's going on? You have this weird look in your eyes. Is something wrong?"
I wanted to hear her tell me where she went that afternoon and what happened. I wanted to believe that she wouldn't keep that from me, but as I stood looking down at her, she said nothing.
"No. I was happy to read your letter and wanted to see you. What made you write it?"
Looking away, she took a deep breath and looked back at me. "I just realized that maybe I am someone you could love."
"Definitely."
"You're home early. Working from home again, Mr. Casual?" she asked as she tugged playfully on my tie.
"Always about my suit and tie. Maybe it's time I changed it up a bit."
"Sweatpants?" She looked me up and down and giggled. "Yeah, I can see it. Grey sweatpants with a mustard stain down the front of them. Maybe a ripped T-shirt?"
Nina's teasing lifted my spirits and I couldn't help but smile. "I'm going to have to work on how you see me. Sweatpants?"