by Hope Ford
Ivy
I read the letter three more times before I dig some paper out of the drawer and grab a pen to write her back.
Dear Ivy,
Thank you so much for your letter. I have to admit to you that I’ve never had a pen pal before. And well honestly, I think the pen pal program is for new officers. So I can only imagine that my name was added out of jest or by accident.
However, I am glad I was added and really appreciate your letter. It’s almost like getting a letter from home. My hometown is only an hour from you, I’m from Knoxville. Small world, right? My family consists of my mom and dad and they have been married for forty years. I have two brothers and one sister. I’m the oldest.
Let’s see, you don’t have to worry about upsetting any wife or significant other. I am single. Being in the Army has sort of prevented me from any kind of relationship. I can only imagine how hard it would be to leave someone you love, so I just haven’t made time for that type of thing.
However, what about your boyfriend? Does it not bother him that you are writing to a man?
I understand not knowing what you want to do with the rest of your life. I joined the army twenty years ago. I recently put in for my retirement so about this time next year, I should be home and trying to figure out what I want to do with the rest of my life. Honestly, I’m a little nervous about it.
So, you’re a pushover. It seems to me that you’re a woman with a good heart. I hate to think of anyone trying to push you around or take advantage of you. I hope you start standing up for yourself. If it helps any you can always say that ‘you have a bad ass soldier that has your back and to quit messing with you’.
That’s nice of you for letting your best friend move in with you. It sounds like she’s lucky to have you in her life.
So, I guess I will follow suit and tell you a little about me. I was a little surprised about how much we have in common. So, here are ten things about me:
1: I am forty years old
2: I agree that family is everything. One of the things I miss most is how my family gets together every holiday. Our parents really go out for any and every holiday.
3: My favorite music is country music.
4: My best friend was killed in the line of duty a few months ago. I still think about him every day.
5: I love to eat cookies. Chocolate chip, peanut butter, sugar… well really, I’ve never found a cookie I didn’t like. If you would want to send some… well, you know, I’ll make sure they are enjoyed.
6: Especially after eating so many MREs, any type of real food is appreciated, but my favorite is Italian and Mexican.
7: I love the mountains, too. Being in the desert more often than not, I have a whole new appreciation for home. I really can’t wait to see it again.
8: I have tattoos. I started getting them when I joined the army. I now have them on my arms, chest and shoulder. Truthfully, I think that I like them so much because every one of them have a special meaning to me.
9: I am enjoying writing this letter. I know that’s so random, but just thinking about it surprises me. I’m not really good at this kind of thing.
10: I am known for being assertive. I am considered by most of my men as a hard ass. Probably even more so since my friend died. So, I don’t really have a lot of ‘friends’ here.
Anyway, thanks for listening to this old man ramble. I think I needed this. Please take care of yourself and I look forward to hearing from you.
Cooper
PS. Please call me Cooper
2
Ivy
January 2019
Dear Cooper,
I’m so glad to hear that you will be getting out at the end of the year. I don’t really know you, but I have been worried about you since I was given your name and address. I can understand you being nervous about retiring. It sounds like the military has been your life and I imagine it’s a little scary to be leaving that life behind. However, you seem like a man that has it together and will make the best of it. And honestly, you have time to figure out what you want to do.
I’ve enclosed a few dozen cookies. I tried to pack them really good, so they wouldn’t get broken. I hope you receive them intact. Nobody wants broken cookies. ;) Let me know if you like them and got enough so I know how much to send next time.
I’m so sorry to hear about your best friend. I can’t imagine what you are going through. I know people say “it was time” or “there’s a bigger plan,” which I agree with, but I can imagine it’s hard to hear in your position. I hope that you are able to grieve for him and find a way to keep his spirit alive.
You’re right, we do have a lot in common. It’s amazing actually how much we have in common. I can’t believe you were raised only an hour from me. That’s crazy. Of course, when I was ten you were already twenty-three so I doubt I would have been hanging out with an old man. LOL. Ya’ know I had to make fun of your age.
Your family sounds amazing. I love that you have a big one. I’m sort of jealous actually. Although my brother and I are close in the fact that we will always be there for each other, we really don’t spend a lot of time with each other. But we still love each other. I imagine that your get togethers are probably chaos, but I think that’s exactly what I think I would want with my own family.
I really like tattoos. I love looking at them. I’ve actually thought about getting one a few times, but when I walk into the shop, I always chicken out. Now, Jenny, my roommate, has a few tattoos. Of course, she’s a more fly by the seat of her pants kind of girl. Not me, I like to have a plan. I actually probably over plan and over analyze things. That’s probably why we are such good friends – we’re very different.
I appreciate your offer to defend me. You are a gentleman through and through. However, I am actually getting better about standing up for myself. Which probably explains why I ended it with my boyfriend. It’s embarrassing to write this, but oh well here it goes, I found out that he was also seeing someone else so I broke it off. But don’t worry, I’m okay with it. We had only been dating for a few months and well, I probably should have ended it before now. He never really was that great to me.
Anyway, it’s good talking to you. I look forward to hearing from you. Please keep in touch and take care of yourself.
Ivy
Cooper
I read the letter again while stuffing another cookie in my mouth. I moan around the chocolate chunks that I am eating faster than I should be. Damn, these are the best cookies I’ve ever eaten. I have started to really look forward to these letters from Ivy. I’m usually a closed-off person. I know that makes me sound like an ass, but honestly, I’ve been this way since I joined the army. Don’t get me wrong. These men and women are like my brothers and sisters. I would lay my life down for them. However, since I raised in the ranks so quickly in my career, I have always been a leader. One that keeps the rest of the unit in line. However, that doesn’t stop them from busting my balls sometimes.
“What you smiling at, Master Sergeant?” One of the new recruits walks into my office and I instantly start looking around, trying to make sure that I have all the cookies wrapped back up.
Too late.
He dives for my desk, pulling a cookie out of the tin and before I can snatch it from his hand, he starts to scarf down the cookie, moaning with each bite. My fists clench hearing him moan like that over something that my Ivy made for me.
I grab the tin and put it onto the table behind me. “Stop that.”
“Stop what?” he grumbles around a mouth full of cookie.
“Stop moaning that way,” I demand and get up from my chair, raising to my full six foot three inch height.
He stops midchew and stares at me. His eyes get really big and a big chocolatey smile covers his face. “A woman sent these to you.”
I walk over to the makeshift door and hold it open. “Yes, a woman made those for me. For me, is the key word here.”
He makes a mad dash to the cookie t
in but before he touches them I say in a low voice that lets him know I mean business, “Touch those and you will be cleaning the latrine for the next six months, recruit.”
His hands shoot up and he backs away from the tin all the way out the door. Pulling the curtain closed in his face, I go back to my desk and sit down. But the recruit has other ideas. He looks through an opening of the thin material and singsongs, “Master Sergeant, in case you don’t know it, those are the best damn cookies I’ve ever eaten. Those cookies were made with love.” And then I can hear his laughter as he walks outside.
I grab the tin and eat another cookie before I pull out some paper and start writing her back.
Dear Ivy,
Thank you for the cookies! They are the best that I’ve ever eaten. I’m ashamed to admit it, but undoubtedly will eat them all in one day. Well, except for the one that a recruit stole from me. But he only got one. I threatened him before he could get his hand on another. You wanted me to pick a favorite, but I can’t. They are all so good.
I’m sorry that your boyfriend hurt you, but I’m glad you ended it with him. I never understand men that cheat. If you have a woman, especially one like you, I couldn’t imagine wanting to look anywhere else. He obviously doesn’t realize how good he had it. (I mean c’mon, has he tasted your cookies?) But seriously, he’ll regret it, I’m sure, and I hope when he does, you don’t take him back. You deserve better than that.
You are right about having a big family. It is chaos, but I wouldn’t change it for anything. Of course, I realize since I’m so old (you really had to bring that up didn’t you?) it’s hard telling how big of a family I will actually have.
You should start thinking about what kind of tattoo you would want. When I get out of here, I will take you to get one. And there won’t be any chickening out. I’m sure I can convince you.
So, since I’ve put in for my retirement I’ve started thinking a lot about what I want to do. And since it seems you are into lists, I thought I would share my list with you. It’s in no certain order.
1: Meet you in person
2: Help veterans. I’ve seen so many men and women come home and their lives are nothing like they were when they left. I want to find a way to support them.
3: Spend time with my family
4: Get married and have kids
5: Buy a home
6: Get a dog
7: Get a tattoo with you
8: Go on vacation (even if it’s only an hour away to the Smoky Mountains)
9: Visit Brigg’s family (He is my best friend that was killed)
10: Take you on a date (I figure since you are no longer taken, it’s okay if I ask you out now.) Of course, it will be awhile before I get home, but it’s still worth asking.
So, there it is. I hope I haven’t totally freaked you out, but I can’t explain this feeling that I get when I receive your letters. It has definitely been a highlight for me. Anyway, if you’re not interested that’s fine. But I hope you are.
I’m going to go for now, before I start spouting out stuff that will really freak you out. I’ve enclosed a picture of myself. I figure you would like to see who you’re talking to. I’m the one in the middle. Would you send me a picture of yourself? I would love to see who made these delicious cookies, and well, who am I kidding, I want to put a face to a name.
Talk to you soon,
Cooper
3
Ivy
February 2019
I’ve been sitting here for ten minutes staring at his picture. I swear when I opened it the first words out of my mouth were “holy shit.” Master Sergeant Cooper Tate is the most handsome man I’ve ever seen in my life. His dark brown hair is cut short and his dark eyes are so intense it’s like he’s staring straight at me. The man is built, making the two men on each side of him look small. His green T-shirt is stretched across his chest and I swear I can see the ripples of his torso flexed underneath. He’s smiling and it makes me wonder what’s going on in the picture. It looks like they are in the desert. Their shirts are wet and I can sweat rolling down their faces, necks and arms. But they look happy.
I open the letter and scan it again. I know exactly what he’s talking about. I didn’t want to admit it to myself, but I get that same excited feeling when I get a letter from him. It surprises me really, he’s so good looking, but I already know what a good guy he is. It seems to me that he is the whole package.
I lay the photo and letter on the table and walk to the hallway of my house to look in the mirror. My long brown hair is up in a high ponytail. My face is round and there are no cheekbones to speak of. I turn to the side and suck in my stomach. Even doing that, my stomach is poofed out, my hips still wide and my ass still big. Blowing out a breath, I try to figure out what I’m going to do.
I hear keys jingling in the door and my roommate, Jenny, walks in and drops everything in her arms before stepping over it.
I shake my head, bending over to pick it up. “Bad day?”
“The worst.” She walks into the living room and flops onto the couch. “I got fired.”
I roll my eyes while I’m hanging her jacket in the closet. This is a pretty common occurrence for Jenny. I guess I’m used to it by now. I walk into the living room. “So, what happened?”
She sits up and stomps her feet down on the ground. “I refused to take out the trash.”
I twitch my nose. “Uh, isn’t that part of your job?” She recently got a job at a fast food restaurant. I don’t know what all she thought she would be doing, but obviously she didn’t think it through.
“Whatever, Ivy. Don’t worry. I’ll start looking for another job tomorrow. But I may be a little late on rent this month,” she explains as she walks into the kitchen.
She’s barely through the door before she comes back out with a cold water in one hand and the picture of Cooper in the other. “Who are these hotties?”
“No one,” I tell her before trying to rip it out of her hands. She jerks it back. “Ooooh. Is one of these your little pen pal? Which one is it?”
I put my hand on my hip and tell her, “You’re acting worse than my kids do at school.”
She rolls her eyes dramatically and I want to tell her that’s exactly what the pre teens do all day, but I decide to leave well enough alone since she’s handing me back the picture.
“So, what’s up? You’re exchanging pictures now?”
I look down at his face on the picture and I swear my heart starts beating faster. “Well, he sent me this and wants me to send a picture back to him.”
“So what are you going to do?” she asks me. It should probably bother me that instead of encouraging me that it will be okay and to send my picture, she’s sort of freaked out about it too. However, this is who Jenny is. She’s been like this as long as I’ve known her.
I shrug my shoulders. “Well, I guess I’ll send a picture. It’s better he finds out what I look like now anyway.” I mean honestly, I know he’s out of my league, but I don’t see a way around it.
Jenny starts jumping up and down. “I’ve got an idea. Instead of sending him a picture of just you, send one of the two of us. And then just don’t tell him which one you are. Let him figure it out.”
Hope flares inside me, but I tamp it quickly down. “I don’t know. It seems pretty dishonest.”
She rolls her eyes again. I’m beginning to realize she does that a lot. “He sent you a picture with two other guys. Just do the same and then conveniently forget to say which one you are. It’s not dishonest. You’re not lying or anything.”
She starts scrolling through the pictures on her phone before shoving it in my face. “Here. This one is perfect.”
I scan it quickly and scrunch my nose up at her. “I’m only half way in the picture. You cut me off.” I scroll through my phone. “Here’s one.” I show her the picture of the two of us the last time we went to the dance club. I don’t bring up the fact that she had left me at the club to find my own way home
that night because she decided to go home with some man. We both have skirts and heels on. However, Jenny’s skinny body is full on display with her shorter skirt and very low cut shirt. I have on a skirt that hits my knees and a black T-shirt. In this picture, we actually sort of look like sisters. We both have brown hair and green eyes.
“Do it. I look good in that one,” Jenny says over my shoulder.
I hit the lock button on my phone and put it back into my pocket. “Okay.”
Later that night, after printing off the picture, I sit at the desk in my room and write Cooper back.
Dear Cooper,
I’m so glad you liked the cookies. I have sent you some more and I made sure to put extra so you can share with your men. Is there anything else that you need I can be sending you?
I really am working on standing up for myself. I even stood up to Jenny today and told her that she had to find and keep a job. She’s normally late on rent and I told her that’s not going to work for me anymore. She was a little surprised to say the least, but it made me feel better.
Where are all the men like you? It’s so nice to hear you say that you don’t believe in cheating on someone. Honestly, it’s refreshing. My teacher friend at school is going through a divorce right now and her marriage ended because her husband was cheating on her. She’s strong though. She’ll be alright. I feel bad for the kids though.
Okay, so I can wait for the tattoo. Maybe when you get out, if you still want to, I will let you take me to get one. I’ll be thinking about what I want. What would you get?
You’re right! I love lists. I loved reading yours. Here are ten things that I want to do: (not in any order)
1 – Meet you
2 – Become a published author (successful too)
3 – Meet my future husband