“The only comfort I had was that when you were with him, I felt happy because Leo wasn’t alone anymore. I knew he made you happy, and you made him happy. That I knew he wouldn’t let you be with anyone else. That he could keep you safe in a way I wouldn’t be able to. That you could have a good life with him, a life you deserved to have, and freedom to live it. A life and freedom you never could have had if you were with me and it was public knowledge.
“I was afraid to admit to him how I felt about you back then because I was worried you’d think he forced me to say it, or that I was lying just so Leo wouldn’t lose you. I honestly thought he’d put his foot down and order you to stay. I never thought he’d let you’d leave, because I knew how much he loved you. It wasn’t a lie when I told you that you made him happier than I’d ever seen him. It wasn’t a lie when I told you he was miserable after you left, and so was I.
“The thing is, I wasn’t jealous that you were with Leo. Ever. I was never jealous about that. I was jealous that he got to have you and I couldn’t. Yes, I was terrified, worrying that my secret might one day get out. I knew Leo could handle the backlash if it did. That he’d even welcome a public spectacle, because it would mean I’d finally let him marry me. All I wanted was for him to hold on to you long enough, until I finally left office and could focus on making you fall in love with me without being in the spotlight anymore and risking your career.”
He slowly shakes his head again. “I could never let anything like that happen to you. It would destroy me to know you were hurt because of me. I was terrified to tell you how I felt back then because I didn’t know how you really felt about me. Every day, I fell a little more in love with you.
“ Then, you left. While you were gone, I used the burner phone to stalk Facebook and Instagram and look at your pictures. I was desperate for any glimpse I could get of you. Once I got you back, I was hoping you would fall as deeply in love with me as I’ve been with you for all these years. I wanted a chance to show you how I really felt about you. I was scared he’d leave me once you returned, so that’s why I got you to promise that you’d stay with me. I knew you wouldn’t break a promise. It’s also why I made you turn your phone off. I was hoping you two would fight, and that it would make you want to side with me until I could figure out how to keep both of you.
“Yeah, I’ve lied to you, and to Leo. But only because I’ve loved you ever since that day when I walked into Shae’s campaign headquarters and met you in person for the first time. The only thing that terrified me more than the thought of losing Leo was the thought of never seeing you again.”
Fuuuuuck.
Now I’m crying, too. Because I look back at the six years I was with Leo before I left and…
I can see everything. Every look Elliot sent my way, every word Elliot uttered. I see them all in an entirely new and heartbreaking context.
I also realize that maybe I was unduly harsh on Leo immediately upon my return. “All those times you watched us, and I thought you were angry because of how Leo was looking at me—”
“It was because he could be with you and I couldn’t. Because I wanted to be with you. I wished it was me you were looking at like that. I wanted it to be me.”
#holyshit
“I wish you’d told me sooner, El. We would’ve figured something out.”
He squeezes his eyes closed, his voice now a pained whisper. “I was scared. I was so scared you’d only want me because Leo wanted me, not because you loved me. And I was scared of Leo leaving me for you. Then you left, and he wouldn’t talk to me about you. I’d been trying to figure out how to get to Tallahassee to see you. To talk to you. I told the director of the field office there to keep an eye on you without you knowing it, because I was going to approach you about working for me. Then they saw Leo stalking you and told me, and when they dug into it, they found out exactly how many times he flew down.”
He opens his eyes. “God, I wanted to scream at Leo. To beg him to just fucking bring you back. Worse, I couldn’t admit to him what I’d done. Or why. Because that would mean admitting to him I’d held back what I felt about you over all those years. That I’d lied to him. I was terrified he’d hate me for being so afraid, and that he’d walk away from me because of the aggravation and pain I’ve caused him because of my fear. I love him. I couldn’t lose him, too.”
Yeah, now I know what it means to say I’m “reeling.” That’s exactly how I feel. “You had me…followed?”
He laughs. “How do you think they knew exactly where your office and cubicle were? I also saw the video of Leo getting the super to let him into your apartment.”
“Wait…what?”
“You hadn’t been living there a week before they had it bugged and installed a hidden camera.” He slowly kisses me. “It’s amazing the shit you can have done when you’re the VP, friends with POTUS, and cite national security.”
“You mean, President Samuels—”
“Yep.” He grins. “Guess Leo’s not the only stalky one.”
“You…watched me?” It’s illegal, and admittedly creepy, and…
Oh, yeah.
Sexy as fuck.
Yeah, I have issues with needing to feel wanted. So sue me.
“I wanted to know if you were with anyone else,” he said. “I would’ve had you dragged back here in handcuffs if you had been. But it killed me knowing you were alone and crying. I wanted to kill Leo for letting you suffer like that. The one damn time above all others when he should’ve rightfully put his foot down and ordered you to stay, he fucking let you leave. Then he wouldn’t go get you and bring you home, where you belonged.”
Holy…shit. Here I thought Leo was stalky?
This is big-boss level shit, right here.
Goddamn, that’s sexy as fuck.
Apparently, he guesses my thoughts. “Yeah. He’s DIY stalky by training and nature.” His possessive smile widens. “I outsourced it.”
“So, when you told me you thought there was a tracking app on my phone…”
“I knew there was. And I wanted you to shut your phone off and keep it off. To punish Leo and make him worry about you. I didn’t want him knowing you were back, at first. I wanted you all to myself for a while.”
Fuuuuuck me.
Here I thought I was nearly as good as Leo at playing things close to the vest. Elliot has both of us beat.
Oh, shit. Fear slams into me. “Do you have me followed now?”
He shakes his head. “No, Sir.” His smile turns bashful, my boy back in the house. “Not since that night when you came back to me, I swear.”
“Elliot, you have to be able to trust me. There will be times I need to do things for you that you cannot know about.”
He nods. “I know, Sir. I do trust you. That’s why I forced myself to chill out and not have you followed once you came back. I was determined to win you over on my own.”
I kiss him. “Love you, El.”
He smiles, the handsome, sweet smile of my boy. “Love you, too, Sir.” His smile fades. “Do you hate me?”
“No. I could never hate you, baby.” I kiss him again. I love the way he kisses. “But no more lies. And I think you just eclipsed Leo in the stalky department.”
He smiles again. “Well, if he had a nearly unlimited budget, he’d probably still have me beat there.”
“True.”
Later, as we lie there after Elliot falls asleep and my body’s trying to release its tenacious hold on the events of the past couple of days, I struggle not to laugh.
Here I thought I was several steps ahead in the game, and likely, so did Leo.
Turns out the two of us are stumbling around and playing three-legged hopscotch, badly, while Elliot’s sitting miles above us playing three-dimensional chess, and still kicking our asses even though he’s blindfolded, and has one hand tied behind his back.
Unbelievable.
My boy will be a fucking awesome president.
Chapter Fifty-Six
/> The next morning, I start the day off with a call to Casey, asking a personal favor of her, one I need kept secret.
She snorts after hearing me out, amused, but agrees to do it. “Forgive me if I don’t tell George about this,” she snarks. “That damn sadist doesn’t need any new ideas to inflict upon us.”
When we arrive at campaign headquarters that night, the detail already knows that we’ll need privacy in Casey’s office, and why.
Well, a vanilla reason why, not the kinky reason.
Elliot has no clue. Neither do the other campaign staffers, who have not been told what’s going on.
Not their business, frankly.
We file into Casey’s office and I shut the door behind us. Elliot looks adorably confused when he spots the strange guy standing next to Casey.
“What’s going on, Jordan?” Elliot asks.
Casey clears her throat. “Mister Vice President, this is Ed Olliver. He’s a body piercer at a well-known tattoo and body mod studio here in DC.”
The man broadly grins and steps forward, hand extended. “Vice President Woodley, it’s an honor to meet you, sir. I voted for President Samuels both times, and I’m voting for you, too.”
Elliot is always quick to pretend he knows what’s going on, and he shakes with the guy. “Thank you very much. I appreciate it.”
“He’s signed an NDA,” Casey tells Elliot. “He was highly recommended to me by several Congressional staffers as someone who is impeccably discreet, and with a very…unique clientele.”
I finally speak up to help ease Elliot’s growing confusion. “I’m getting another piercing.” I take Elliot’s hands in mine and gently squeeze, dropping my voice to a whisper. “Left leads, right receives. I’m getting a daith in my ear. You pick which ear it goes in.”
“Wait, what? What’s a daith?”
I turn to Ed. “Can you explain it to him, please?”
“Sure.” He has his own in each ear, among other piercings, and then offers a selection of different captive bead rings for Elliot to choose from.
Elliot looks at me. “I’m picking?”
“Yes. It’s subtle enough few people will likely even notice I have it. Those who do, I’ll tell them it’s for migraines. Some people swear it helps with them.”
“Really?”
Casey nods. “Really. That’s why Secret Service thinks he’s getting it.”
I’m looking Elliot in the eyes as I say it. “You pick which ear you want me to wear it in,” I repeat. “Owner, or owned. And you pick the ring you want me to wear. It’s a captive bead ring, meaning it doesn’t come out. It always stays in. Just like my others.”
His nostrils flare a little, his pupils growing larger as he stares into my eyes and full comprehension finally slams into his brain.
I know he now understands what I’m offering him, especially in light of his admission last night.
“Right ear,” he whispers. “I want it in your right ear.”
I smile. “Yes, Mister Vice President,” I whisper back, tipping my head to him the way he tips it to me and Leo.
He reaches down and adjusts himself in his slacks before taking my hands again.
“I want one, too,” he blurts out. “In my left ear. The same ring.” He swallows hard. “Matchies,” he adds, his voice thick with emotion. “And I…get migraines, right? Everyone knows that. They know I get migraines.”
I glance over at Casey and motion with my head toward the guy.
She’s always quick on the uptake. She touches the guy’s shoulder. “So, what is this thing?” she asks, pointing at what I know is a small, portable autoclave sitting on her desk behind them.
And they turn their backs to us.
I squeeze Elliot’s hands again. “Will that help?” I whisper. “Does that even things out? Your mark on me, permanently, making me yours.”
He nods, blinking, his eyes now a little too bright. “Yeah. It does.” He squeezes my hands long and hard as he stares into my eyes.
Five minutes later, Elliot’s picked out matching plain, surgical stainless rings for us, but he insists on being pierced first. The rings go into the autoclave, along with two sets of piercing needles. Elliot takes a seat and Ed swabs Elliot’s ear with antiseptic to prep it so he can mark the placement.
Once everything’s ready, I hold Elliot’s hands and he stares into my eyes as Ed does it. Moments later, it’s done. Elliot barely winces, and he squeezes my hands a little tighter as the needle goes in, but I realize this man’s survived so much pain and trauma already that this probably barely blips on his personal scale.
Hell, he probably experiences more pain during a workout.
Once Ed’s finished, Elliot looks at it with a hand mirror Ed passes to him.
We swap places. Moments later, Elliot’s holding my hands while Ed gets ready to do mine.
“Love you so much,” Elliot silently mouths at me.
I smile. “Love you, too,” I mouth back.
And then…it’s done. Hurts a lot less than my nipples did, to be honest.
Casey pays the man cash, and apparently there were no authorization forms to sign. Or she told him there wouldn’t be any forms signed, who knows? Doesn’t matter.
Once Ed gathers his things, she escorts him out, closing the door behind her and leaving the two of us in her office.
Instead of standing, I slide out of the chair and onto my knees. “Like this, Mister Vice President?”
He makes that sexy fucking growl again and, seconds later, I’ve fished his cock out of his slacks and am swallowing it to the root. Not that I’d have much choice, because he takes over to fuck my throat as fast, hard, and deep as he wants to.
Fuck, he’s unhinged, and I love it. Even as I hiss in pain when he grabs my head and brushes against my new piercing, my cock’s aching, but I’ll wait.
Elliot’s truly mine. For a few sweet moments, nothing’s in my brain except the residual pain from the piercing and the taste of my guy’s cock sliding over my tongue. He softly gasps as he spills down my throat, and then he’s pulling me up, into his arms, tightly squeezing me with his face buried in my hair.
“Thank you, thank you.” He repeats it over and over as he catches his breath.
I know he doesn’t mean for the orgasm.
“For life,” I tell him. “I’m not going anywhere. I won’t leave him again, and I’ll never leave you.”
That’s when his brain falls back into his head. “What’s Leo going to say? About these?”
I shrug. “Does it matter what he says? These are ours, for us. These aren’t for him. Honestly? I don’t care what he says.”
He tips my head to the left, so he can stare at the ring in my right ear. “No,” he finally says. “I don’t care what he says, either.”
“We don’t have to tell him what you told me last night, if you don’t want to. This can be our thing. If he asks, you can defer to me, and I’ll handle it.”
Uncertainty returns to his features. With his own junior sadist now happily sated, he’s thinking about the real-world implications. “Okay,” he finally says. “Thank you, baby.”
It’s a little odd hearing him call me that, but like hell will I ever complain. “Thank you.” I kiss him. “You ready to get to work? Or do we need a few more minutes?”
He glances down, realizes his cock’s still hanging out, and blushes as he tucks himself in. “Jesus,” he mutters. “Was the door even locked?”
“Does it really matter?”
His gaze lifts to mine and pauses for a long moment. “No,” he finally says. “It doesn’t matter. Because I know you won’t leave me.”
“That’s right, boy. You’re stuck with me forever.”
* * * *
Grace’s funeral is held that Friday evening, and we move a campaign event to fit Elliot’s attendance into the schedule. It’s held in the National Cathedral. Her family chose not to have her body lie in state ahead of time.
Which…I thought was u
nusual. I would have put money on every bit of pomp and circumstance being employed. Instead, they opted to have her cremated, and aren’t even holding a funeral for her back in Nebraska.
Apparently, her parents feel that, due to the circumstances of her death, it’s better to keep the attention to a minimum. There’s going to be a tree-planting ceremony in the spring and I’ve already noted my calendar to make sure I Elliot’s present.
We glean that information from Stella, who is being uncharacteristically low-snark with me when she calls to talk to Elliot this week.
Moving on from that… Between the debate prep and an increasingly grueling campaign schedule, combined with the president’s busy schedule working and then stumping for Elliot, we hardly see Leo over the next several weeks. No time for sex with him, and no overnights.
I don’t like that, and I know Elliot doesn’t, either, but we knew what we were signing up for and that this part of the campaign would be a grueling, marathon slog of gargantuan proportions.
We don’t point out the piercings to Leo. If he notices, he doesn’t say anything. I’m not sure how that makes me feel, but I honestly don’t have time to sit there and obsess over it.
Or over the fact that law enforcement has closed the matter of Grace’s death, the coroner officially declared it an accidental overdose, and neither my name, nor Leo’s, were mentioned in the press.
I start to relax a little.
About that, at least. It’s the only facet of my life, other than the certainty of the relationship between Elliot and Leo and myself, that I can relax over.
Ciro has proven to be a fantastic choice as a running mate for Elliot. The more time we spend with him on the campaign trail, the more I like him. The people like him, too, his polling stats climbing every week. He’s genuine, energetic, funny when appropriate, and soberly knowledgable and statesmanlike when needed.
Barring any massive fuck-ups, we should be able to get him elected in eight years, although there’s always a risk of the House and the Senate swinging back into GOP control during Elliot’s second term. That’s not unheard of when one party’s had control of the White House and both houses of Congress for a while.
Innocent (Inequitable Trilogy Book 2) Page 61