by Ann Lister
“Nick, that was two months ago! I’m lucky if I can remember the details of the patients we saw yesterday!”
“Can you at least take a look around your desk for me and see if the letter got jammed beneath something? Is that too much to ask?”
Nick stormed off and headed for the door leading to the parking lot. He was about to slam the door, when Glen stopped him.
“What’s going on?” Glen asked Nick.
Nick cursed again. “I just saw Colby.”
“Are you sure it was her?” Glen asked.
“We had a conversation! I’m sure it was her,” Nick said.
Nancy came up behind them and handed Nick a sealed envelope. “I think this must be what you were looking for, Nick. I’m sorry,” she said. “It must have been covered and I forgot all about it.”
Nick grabbed at the envelope and disappeared outside. He found an empty picnic table and sat on the top, opening the letter. Inside was a single sheet of paper with Colby’s handwritten message. He read through the text three times, making sure he had read it correctly. Her words expressing her feelings hit him hard. Was it possible she had felt the same as he did, he wondered? And, more importantly, did she still feel the same?
At the bottom of the paper, Colby had listed two different phone numbers and even her email address. There was no doubt she had wanted him to contact her. She had left the door open for him to walk through and he never got the message. All this time, and she was thinking he wasn’t interested. He tipped his head back and exhaled loudly, then he pulled his cell phone from his pocket and dialed her number.
“Colby. It’s Nick. I had Nancy dismantle her desk and she found your letter. I just finished reading it.” If it weren’t for the soft hum of her breathing, Nick would have sworn she had disconnected their call. “I really think we need to talk, Colby.”
“And, I don’t.”
“Please, have dinner with me.”
“You mean, like a date?”
“Sure.”
“Don’t you think we’re beyond dating, Nick? We skipped right over that and went straight to the sex. It would be difficult to go back now, wouldn’t you agree? Besides, what would your current girlfriend have to say about you having dinner with me?”
“Damn it! I told you, she’s not my girlfriend,” Nick said, then immediately regretted his tone.
“Good-bye, Nick.”
“Colby! Don’t hang-up.”
The next day, Nick found Colby sitting in the sunshine outside the employee housing area. She was sitting with another woman, laughing and smiling the way he remembered her, but as soon as she saw him approaching, the laughter stopped and her smile faded.
“Colby,” he said, interrupting their conversation. “Can we talk?”
“I’m busy,” she said.
The woman sitting beside Colby stood up, making a hasty retreat, and Nick took her seat.
“I didn’t say I wanted company,” Colby said, shifting uneasily in her seat.
“This is a public area,” he said. “I’m not breaking any rules by sitting here.”
“What do you want, Nick?” Colby asked. She crossed her legs, doing her best to ignore him, which was no easy task, considering how good he looked, dressed in dark tight jeans, hiking boots, and a black ski parka.
Nick adjusted himself in the chair and set his ankle on his opposite knee, trying to appear relaxed even though his stomach was knotted and his heart was racing at the sight of her. She had her blond hair pulled back in a loose ponytail and her piercing blue eyes were holding him with the force of a vise grip.
“It’s really good to see you,” he said softly. “I didn’t think I’d ever have the opportunity again, so the surprise is…overwhelming.”
“It was overwhelming to see you, too,” Colby said coldly. She looked away from him, the memory of him kissing the brunette still fresh in her mind.
Nick fidgeted nervously in his chair and bent toward her. “I don’t know where to start, Colby, but there’s a lot I want to say.”
“Don’t bother.”
Nick shook his head. “Why not? You said in your letter there was a lot you wanted to say to me. Has that changed?”
“I felt like that two months ago!”
“Then, why did you come back?” he asked.
“I came back to work.”
“Is that the only reason you returned?” he pushed.
Colby tipped her head and closed her eyes. “I also wanted closure with you and I got that, the moment I saw you kissing that…girl, which for the record, is way too young for you.”
Nick smiled knowingly. “She's a bit young for me, but you’re assuming you know my age.”
Colby's back went straight; her chin tipped up. “You’re right. I don’t know your age,” she said. Anger made her voice shake. “Nor do I know where you live, where you grew up or anything about your family. I don’t even know your full name, your birthday or what you like to eat. When it comes right down to it, I don’t know a damn thing about you, except…”
“Except for what?” Nick asked.
“Never mind. It doesn’t matter.”
Nick dropped his gaze to his lap. “You know more about me than you’re willing to admit.”
Colby rolled her eyes in irritation. “You don’t know anything about me, either, so I guess we’re even.”
“What I do know about you, I love, and I’d like an opportunity to get to know the rest - if you’d let me.”
“I have to go,” she said, and stood up.
Nick caught her by the wrist and stopped her. “January thirty-first is my birthday. I turned thirty-six a few weeks ago. I don’t really have a favorite color and I love Italian food. I don’t require a lot of sleep, I enjoy cooking, and I love the outdoors, but you already knew that,” he smiled. “And, if you allow me to cook you dinner, you can see where I live for yourself. How does that sound?”
“No thank you,” she said, and yanked her arm from his grip.
Nick stood up in front of her, blocking her exit; the hurt evident in his eyes. “Why won’t you see me?” he asked.
“I’m seeing you now, aren’t I?”
“That’s not what I meant,” he said.
“I have to go,” she repeated, and started walking toward the entrance door to the employee housing.
Moments later, Colby passed the woman she had been sitting with outside.
“You know Nick Gaffney?” the woman asked.
“I thought I did, but as it turns out, I don’t. Why?”
The woman shrugged. “Nick has a bit of a reputation around here with the ladies and I thought perhaps you had fallen prey to his intense brown eyes,” she said.
“Reputation?” Colby asked.
“You could say that. Nick has a pattern of ‘loving the ladies’ and then leaving them after…you know.”
“You don’t say,” Colby said with sarcasm.
“He was a lot different before his engagement disintegrated.”
“Engagement?” Colby asked. The knot in her stomach was growing larger by the second.
“He was engaged a few years ago and the wedding was called off only weeks before the scheduled date. I never heard why, but his fiancée is no longer working here - that much I do know. And since then, he’s gone through a succession of girlfriends.”
Colby turned and began to run back toward the door leading outside. She ran across the courtyard and spotted Nick rounding the corner of the lodge. She came up behind him and used both hands to shove him on the back, the force nearly caused him to lose his balance.
“What the hell…” he said, and spun around to face the perpetrator.
“You were engaged?” Colby asked. Emotion filled her eyes.
“Who told you that?” he asked. He moved Colby away from the tourists who now had a keen interest in their heated conversation.
“The woman I was sitting with just informed me you had a fiancée! Is that true?”
Nick ran a
hand over his face. “Yes, it’s true, Colby,” he sighed. “That was probably the lowest point in my life and why I don’t usually talk about it. Can you blame me for that?” he asked.
Colby held onto her head. “Oh, my God!” she said, and moved away from him like he had a contagious disease.
“Why are you mad about that? It was almost four years ago!”
“I’m not mad because you had a fiancée, Nick. I’m upset because you never mentioned it! It just proves my point further, that despite the fact I spent four days alone with you, how very little I actually know. Damn it! I can’t believe I fell in love with a man I hardly know! I must be a complete idiot,” Colby wiped the tears from her cheeks and began to walk away.
“What did you just say?” Nick asked. He came up beside her and grabbed her by the arm.
Colby stopped and met his gaze. His deep brown eyes were big, fluid pools of raw emotion that took her breath away. Her bottom lip began to quiver.
“Did you really fall in love with me?” he asked. He took two steps closer to her.
“That was two months ago, Nick. A lot has happened since then.”
“If your feelings were real, two months wouldn’t have changed anything.”
“I guess you could say, I got a ‘wake-up call’, when I saw you kissing that girl. It put everything into perspective for me and made me realize you’re not the man I thought you were.”
“Colby, if I’d had your phone number, I would have called, but that information wasn’t available to me! I’m sorry it happened the way it did, but we’re together now. Why can’t we move beyond all of that and explore the feelings we still obviously have for each other?”
Colby hung her head in exhaustion. “I honestly don’t know what I feel anymore.”
“Fine. We can explore that and see what comes of it.”
“I’m not sure I want to, Nick,” she said. Fresh tears began to spill onto her cheeks.
He felt like he was beating his head against a brick wall and it hurt. He didn’t want to keep pushing Colby to do something she obviously wasn’t interested in doing. The only thing left was to walk away and hope that time would make her come around and see him for what he really was: a man crazy in love with her and willing to do just about anything for her to love him again.
He dug his hands into his pockets and waited until she looked at him. “I don’t want to keep fighting like this, Colby,” he whispered. “So, I’ll back off and let it be. If you change your mind, you know where to find me.”
Nick shifted backwards, holding her gaze for a few more moments, then turned and disappeared into the crowd and Colby fell to pieces.
Chapter Seven
Two painful weeks passed, with Nick keeping a safe distance from Colby and Colby doing her best to pretend she was happy about it.
“Colby, a few of us are going to the lodge tonight to hear the house band. Would you like to join us?” a female co-worker asked Colby.
“I’m not sure that’s such a good idea,” Colby said.
“You can’t hide in your room forever! Come with us,” Sandy insisted. “It’ll be fun.”
Colby knew they were right. Hiding in her room was exactly what she had been doing, and if she continued to do so, these would be the longest six months of her life. She agreed to go out with the girls and went home to change.
At seven o’clock, Colby and her co-workers made their way to the bar restaurant. They ate dinner before moving into the club for the entertainment. The club had two large rooms connected together with doors that opened to a wrap-around deck that faced the ski lifts up the mountain. A round dance area was directly in front of the stage, which was surrounded by dozens of tall cocktail-sized tables and chairs.
Colby and her friends found a table down by the dance floor. They ordered drinks and waited for the band to hit the stage. With every passing minute, more people spilled into the club from the adjoining restaurant and deck areas. Many were over-dressed couples wearing designer clothing, while others arrived in groups clearly ready to get sweaty and party.
“You must be new,” a friendly man said to Colby. “I’m John Lancaster from guest catering,” he said, and extended his hand to Colby.
“Nice to meet you,” she said. “I’m Colby Hansen. I work in reservations.”
Colby watched John smile. He had a relaxed feel about him; which she found appealing, deep blue eyes, dark blond hair, and a tall, trim physique.
“Are you here indefinitely or do they have you under contract?” he asked.
“I have a six month contract, with a review after three months,” she said, feeling her face blush when he moved closer in order to hear her better.
“Ah, I see. You left the door open in case you want to go home,” he teased.
“Yes, something like that.”
“Where you from?” he asked, and rested an elbow on the table and leaned in to her.
“Los Angeles.”
“What brought you out here?”
“I guess you could say I was looking for a change,” Colby said.
“That seems to be the excuse everyone uses.”
“How long have you been here?” she asked.
“Eight years. I’m originally from Columbus, Ohio. I moved here after my divorce.”
Colby raised her eyebrows in surprise. She already knew more about John in five minutes of conversation than she had learned from Nick over the course of four days. Then she cursed herself for allowing the thought of Nick to enter her brain.
“Any kids?” Colby asked.
“Nope. How about you? Are you married, divorced or looking?”
“I’ve never been married,” Colby laughed. “I’m still trying to find the illusive Mr. Right, but so far he doesn’t seem to exist.”
John tipped his chin to Colby and grinned. “Do you like to dance?” he asked, after he heard the band start playing their first song. He held his hand out to her and waited.
Colby glanced at her girlfriends, as if looking for approval. When both women nodded, Colby hopped off her chair and took John’s hand. He led her to the dance floor and, even though the music had a quick rhythm to it, he pulled her close to him for a slow dance.
In a dark corner at the back of the club, Glen sat with Nick. It was Glen that spotted Colby first and pointed her out to Nick.
“Take a look at that,” Glen said, nodding his head toward the dance floor.
Nick scanned the crowded dance floor, then stopped on the blonde. “Shit,” he muttered under his breath. “Who’s she dancing with?”
“It looks like John Lancaster. He’s a chef in the catering department.”
Nick sat back in his chair and looked away. It was too painful to see another man’s arms wrapped around Colby, when he knew in his heart it should be him holding her.
“I think I’ll head home,” Nick said quietly.
“You just got here! Why would you leave now?” Glen asked.
“If it’s all the same to you, I’d rather not sit here and watch Colby dancing.”
“Then, create a distraction for yourself and do what I told you to do weeks ago: move on!”
“Easy for you to say,” Nick said to Glen.
“And, here comes your distraction now,” Glen said, watching Lana enter the club by the back door.
“What a nice surprise,” Lana said to Nick.
“Actually, I was getting ready to leave,” Nick said.
“Why would you leave this early?” Lana asked.
“His old girlfriend is here and Nick doesn’t want to watch her having a good time,” Glen said, and rolled his eyes.
“Then come dance with me and we’ll make her jealous,” Lana said, and reached for Nick’s hand.
Nick eased his hand free from Lana’s grip. “No thanks,” he said. “I’m not into playing games.”
“Okay, then come to the bar with me and we’ll get a drink,” she said, and tugged at his hand again.
Nick allowed Lana to pull hi
m to his feet and held her hand through the crowd, as they made their way into the bar area. Their route brought them directly past Colby’s table. He was certain she had seen him, but he didn’t dare make eye contact with her. At the bar, he made sure he put his back to Colby, leaving Lana in her line of vision.
Lana pressed herself against Nick at the bar and ran her fingers through his hair. “You look delicious tonight,” she said, running her hand over his broad shoulder and down onto his narrow waist.
“You, too,” Nick said. He dragged his eyes away from her cleavage and took a sip from his beer bottle.
Lana slipped her hand into the back pocket of Nick’s jeans and pulled his hips to hers. “Would you like a taste?” she asked, and covered his mouth with hers. Their kiss was hot and hungry, like two people needing the physical contact to sustain their lives, until Nick broke the seal.
“You’re an amazing kisser, Nick,” Lana cooed beside his ear. “It makes me want to rip off all your clothes and do you right here, standing up against the bar.”
Nick smiled and wiped the moisture from his lips with his thumb. “I wouldn’t advise that.”
“Okay, then, let’s go back to my room,” she said.
Nick dropped his gaze to his feet. His hand went to Lana’s shoulder and gently pushed her away. “There’s no doubt, you are sexy as hell, and you sure know how to work it, but…I can’t…”
Lana sighed loudly. “Yeah. Yeah. I know, you’re still in love with your old girlfriend. By the way,” she said, peering around Nick’s shoulder. “She’s been staring at us since we got to the bar.”
“She’s with someone,” Nick said with indifference, even though it was killing him.
“If she’s with someone else, why can’t you be with me?” Lana asked, and met his gaze.
“It’s complicated, Lana,” he said. “She saw me kissing you the other day and assumes we’re together. I told her we weren’t, but she didn’t believe me and, of course, her seeing us together right now isn’t helping to disprove that theory.”
“Would you like me to talk to her?” Lana asked.
“No, leave it alone,” he said. “If she wants me back, she knows where to find me.”