“I don’t.”
With a mouth like a cat’s arse, she picked up the glass, poured the wine down the sink and set the glass in it. She turned and left without looking back, only her heels clicking along his tiled hall floor. The door slammed, and he hoped she was gone for good.
He took a deep breath and drank his wine, feeling so much better.
Rebecca wasn’t sure why she was cooking a massive roast dinner seeing as it was far too hot halfway through August. Arthur had been tentative with her, too much so for her liking. Though, instead of Tuesdays and Fridays, he came for Sunday lunch too.
As ever, his plate was piled high as she kept feeding him up. He ate every bit.
“I can’t eat anymore,” Arthur said as Rebecca put the rhubarb crumble in the oven to warm.
He eyed it as he said it though, one hand rubbing his stomach.
She grinned at him, and Alice laughed as they sat around the kitchen table.
“I have to run an extra mile every day because of your cooking.”
“You’re fine as you are.” She topped up Alice’s wine and gave him what she hoped was a flirty smile.
“Only because I run.” Arthur sat back with narrowed eyes.
Over the past week or so, they’d exchanged a few texts, nothing too sexy, a little flirting, but that was it. She wanted more, and it was time. Rebecca kept glancing at him.
Arthur insisted on cleaning up, and Alice napped with the radio on in the lounge. Rebecca watched him from the doorway as he wiped the sides down.
“What’s up?” He washed his hands.
“Do you want to go on a date?”
He put the hand towel down and faced her. “I don’t know.”
Rebecca nodded and went to leave.
“Wait.” He went to her and took her hand in his.
“I didn’t mean… I thought it would be nice, nothing has to happen, I wanted to spend some time with you. It’s silly.”
“No, it’s anything but. I want to. We’ll go out. How do you feel about dating your boss?”
“I don’t care anymore. I only care about you.” Rebecca couldn’t raise her head but gripped his shirt, eyes on his chest.
When he cupped her face, she pressed into his hand. Slowly, he lowered his face and kissed her. She hovered near his mouth when he drew back, her arms went around him, and pulled him back down.
Arthur pressed her against the doorframe and snogged her with all the pent-up energy between them, and he was all tongue and lips. He lifted her a little, hands under her bottom, and squeezed, his body pressed against hers. She clung onto him, hands gripping his back, and tongues stroking together in a needy rhythm until Arthur tore himself away from her.
“Fuck.” Tipping her head back, he kissed down her neck and setting her down, his hands explored her figure, as hers found his lovely firm bottom.
“Why don’t you two go for a walk.”
Arthur sprang back, and Rebecca screamed.
Alice tried not to laugh as she came into the kitchen. Rebecca put her hand over her mouth to halt her laughter.
Pulling his lips into his mouth, he seared Rebecca with a look that made her stomach drop. “I should be going.”
“Nonsense, I only came for some lemonade. I’m tired, I’ll think I’ll go to bed.”
“Are you all right Alice?” Rebecca patted her hot cheeks with the cool backs of her hands.
“Just feel a little groggy, dear. Behave you two.”
“Let me help you. Arthur, I’ll be right back.”
He nodded, a little frown appearing as he sat down.
“Alice, are you sure you’re okay?”
“I think it’s the heat, and so humid too.”
“It is a little sticky.” Rebecca helped her get ready for bed and put the fan on. Alice sat propped up sipping her drink.
“Well, that’s not what I expected to see.” A knowing little smile flickered over her mouth.
“I’m sorry-”
“Sorry? Oh dear, no, don’t be, I’m happy. Really. So happy for you. Arthur looks so much better already, and you two are so sweet together.” Alice squeezed Rebecca’s hand in a little shake; bony strength under her fragile skin.
It made Rebecca’s heart lurch. “Thank you, I think we’ll go for that walk.”
“You do that.”
“I won’t be late.”
“Be as late as you like, dear, you’re only young once.”
Rebecca laughed and left Alice.
Arthur was where she left him. He reached out for her hand, and she took it.
The feel of his hand in hers was so right. “I’ll call the doctor in the morning and get her to come out.”
“Thank you. Mum said we should go for a walk.”
“Then let’s go.” Rebecca put on her flat sandals, and they got into Arthur’s car. “This is a funny walk.”
“There’s the big park down by the river. It’s nice.” Arthur put on his sunglasses and drove out. The AC in his car tempered the heat of the afternoon, and the gentle drone of the radio was familiar and comforting.
They walked hand in hand through the park, surrounded by loud families, and kids playing.
The crowds thinned out as the headed away from the landscaped gardens and well-mowed lawns, and into a curated wilderness. A path wound up and along a hill, heavily shaded, and cooler. Rebecca eyed a secluded bench and pulled Arthur to it.
When they sat, he put his arm across the back of the bench, and she couldn’t help but lean her head on his shoulder.
“Rebecca.”
She turned her face up and kissed him. There was no hesitation, no nerves, only the desire she felt.
Occasionally people passed them, but neither cared; all they did was kiss. When her lips tingled, she pulled away. Rebecca felt safe with Arthur. He pulled her into a hug, and she snuggled into him. Only the heat forced her away; he was making her sweat.
“We should head back, I want to keep an eye on Alice.”
He sighed. “I guess, come on, beautiful.” He pulled her up and kissed her again. She laughed, and they meandered back.
Arthur dropped her home. “I won’t come in. If you need me, call.”
“Okay.” She pecked his lips and darted out of the car.
At that moment, she’d never been happier. Odd how that happens, one brilliant and perfect moment is given, only to be followed by the shit life throws.
Rebecca got up Monday morning, still thinking about Arthur. She pottered in her robe, yawning as she made tea for Alice.
As normal, she went up with Alice’s teacup and knocked on her door before opening it. She set the cup down quietly.
“Morning.” Rebecca opened the curtains letting the weak dawn fill the room. “Alice do you need help sitting up?”
Silence.
Rebecca turned to the bed and looked at Alice, her mouth was open, sheets barely disturbed, her eyes closed, and she looked asleep. It took a few seconds for Rebecca to realise what was wrong. Alice wasn’t breathing.
“Alice?” She swallowed and moved slowly to the bed and touched her hand, finding it cold. Rebecca couldn’t move. She was gone. Just like that.
Frozen, Rebecca heard her own heart beating and her sharp breaths. Sweat pooled as her skin tingled. She swallowed her shock and made herself walk out of the room, taking the cup of tea with her. She closed the door and sat on the top stair.
Staring at nothing, she didn’t think. The hall clock ticked, and the tea was cold when she came back to herself. Arthur. His face came to her mind. She went and grabbed her phone, wondering what she would say. It was only seven.
He answered on the third ring, not quite awake. “Good morning.”
She couldn’t tell him on the phone. “Arthur, you need to come to the house.”
“What’s wrong?” His abrupt answer and pause before let her know that he understood, even if he wasn’t aware of it.
&nbs
p; “Just right now, you need to come to the house.”
She heard him swallow. “I’ll be right there.”
Rebecca still sat at the top of the stairs, unable to leave her post when he opened the door. He looked up at her and leant on the bannister as he went up to join her.
Finally, she met his stare. “She was gone when I went in with her tea.”
He flopped down next to her and turned to the door. Arthur’s heavy presence loomed next to her, and she faced him and took his hand. He shuddered a breath.
“What do I do?” he said in a small, lost voice.
“I’ll help you, I’m here.” She put her arm around him, and he held her with his head on her shoulder.
“I want to see her.” He let go and went to her room, hovering with his hand on the handle. He took a deep breath and went in. Rebecca watched through the open doorway.
He neared the bed and touched her hand. Rebecca closed her eyes and turned away.
She bit the side of her thumb when he came back. “I’ve looked up what we do. We need to ring the doctors’ surgery, and they’ll send a GP out.”
He nodded.
Rebecca made tea. They sat in the kitchen, the light had a quiet buzz, which normally didn’t bother anyone, but it seemed unnaturally loud. Rebecca turned it off, and they sat in the morning light.
“It’s my fault.”
Arthur blinked. “How?”
“I knew she wasn’t right. I should have called the out of hours service.”
Arthur reached over and held her hand and wouldn’t let it go.
It seemed an age until eight, and she rang the doctors’ over and over until the receptionist finally answered and she had a strange conversation of sympathetic tones in a professional script that the receptionist must have given a hundred times before.
After she ended the call, they sat in silence. When the doorbell went, they both jumped. The quiet moments before the process of acknowledging a death were over.
Rebecca rubbed the back of Arthur’s hand before she got up and answered the door.
The young doctor was kind and respectful. Alice needed a post-mortem. They waited for the private ambulance to take her to the hospital. People filled the house, all with careful tread, neutral well-trained faces, and professional words. It jarred against the brutal, harsh nature of death, even a peaceful one. Too raw and new.
It was after twelve when the ambulance left them. Then they were alone.
“Now what?” he asked.
“We have to wait for the results. Then we can register it, and then we plan the funeral.” Rebecca was exhausted and sighed.
“She has a plan in place.”
“Then, for now, there’s nothing to do.”
“I need to do something, but I’m so tired.” He rubbed his eyes with the heel of his hands and took a steadying breath but didn’t remove his hands.
Her voice broke as she whispered his name. He shook his head and took another breath.
“Come here.” She put her arms around his middle, and he held her tight. Relaxing into her, he cried with his face buried in her neck as she soothed his back and gently rocked him.
He pulled back, clearing his throat when his stomach growled. She didn’t say anything but took him back into the kitchen and made them sandwiches and ate, but the sandwich might as well have been sand, it had no taste. She washed her face at the sink, to cool her blotchy skin, and tidied the plates away.
“What do you want to do? I mean, I don’t want to be alone, and I doubt you want to be here alone, and I'm not sure I want to be here.” Arthur nursed a cup of tea as she cleaned up.
“Let’s go to your house. We can’t do anything until we hear from the coroner.”
“Okay.”
Arthur drove them over, and when Rebecca walked in, she looked around at the stark impressive house. Arthur was despondent, standing in the hall.
“Right. Tea or booze?” she asked.
“Booze. I want to go to sleep.”
She followed him into the kitchen. He pulled out a bottle of whisky, his good stuff by the look of it and poured them a drink each, and they took it one. Smooth and warming, followed by burning. He poured them another.
“I have to tell people.”
“This minute?”
He only shrugged and drank the second one, pulling a face.
“How about right now, you don’t. You do what you need.” She turned the glass she’d barely touched.
His face crumpled, but only for a moment. He took her hand and pulled her behind him. She followed him upstairs, heart in her mouth.
The unmade bed filled the room and a few things scattered about as he led her in, and he started getting undressed. Rebecca stood there, unsure what to do.
When he was only in his boxer briefs, he opened a drawer, taking out a large white t-shirt, passed it to her, closed the curtains, and crawled into bed.
She undressed, watching him the whole time. She didn’t care if he saw her naked, but he curled up on his side. She took off her bra, but left her briefs on, pulled the t-shirt over her head, and climbed in next to him.
He scooted over to her and pulled her into his arms and snuggled down so his head rested under her neck, and arm draped over her waist.
She absently ran her hand down his back and nuzzled her face into his hair. They stayed that way for some time until his breathing relaxed and his body became heavier as he fell asleep.
It was dark when she woke up and warm and comfortable. Arthur snored a little, his face pressed into her neck and breath puffing onto it.
Alice was gone. She tried not to cry, but the tears came anyway.
“Hey.” Arthur sounded groggy. He shushed her, running his fingers through her hair. He moved up to her face, cupping it. “I’m here.” He pressed his lips to hers, only to reassure her.
He brushed his thumb across her tears. Rebecca shook her head.
They held fast to each other as the day darkened, hours lost in waiting with time slipping by, and lulled by exhaustion and each other, they fell asleep.
Rebecca wore the t-shirt he gave her as she moved about the kitchen. She woke feeling like hell and crawled out of bed. She tidied up and sat as light faded from the patio windows in the kitchen. His house was expensive, sterile, and new. Little of Arthur in it.
She decided to wake him and began cooking. The smell of bacon must have done it for her, and she waited for him to come down after hearing him move about upstairs.
“I feel like I’ve been out on the lash. Hungry?”
“A little.” His voice was gravelly.
“You know I love to feed you.” She gave him a little smile, put food in front of him, and he ate.
“Thank you.” He said it quietly as he put his knife and fork down. “Will you stay tonight?”
“Yes. Anything you need.”
“Good.” Arthur got up and vanished, returning with some sweats, and handed them to her. “You look too good, you know.”
They sat in the living room watching TV for a few hours drinking whisky. By the third, Rebecca’s vision spun. They lay out on his big sofa, and Arthur ran his hands through her hair.
“Your hair is so pretty.”
“Thank you.”
“Your roots are light.”
“Yes.” She propped her chin on his chest. “Wanna talk?”
“No. I want something else, but not like this. Not today.”
“Arthur.”
He pulled her up his body and kissed her. Hard and needy. Almost rough with her, his hands held tight, and she felt the scrape of teeth.
She pushed away.
“I’m sorry.” Pained, he stood up. His hands shook as he put them to his mouth.
“I wasn’t expecting it, that’s all.” She held her hand out to him, but he shook his head.
Rebecca stood, and pulled his hands from his face, and led him to bed.
Sh
e held him like before, cradling him to her and they lay there, Arthur’s open mouth breathing her skin, and then she felt it, a silent tear falling on her.
They both cried until spent and exhausted, they slept.
Thirteen
NEW WAYS
Arthur stared at the ceiling, he watched the light creep up through the dawn, Rebecca sleeping next to him. She was so lovely. Gentle, almost delicate, but her strength of character was rare.
He loved that about her. For a moment, it was perfect, and then he saw his mother’s utterly still body in her room. The dim light and smell of roses that would always be his mother’s scent turned his heart.
Running his hand along Rebecca’s arm, he wanted to forget everything and make love to her. He took a long, cool shower instead, almost revolted at himself. He pictured his mum’s cold hand. The people in her house dealing with it all, and through it, Rebecca at his side.
A thousand thoughts came to mind, his mother at the seaside when he was a boy. His father’s funeral. The sound of her laughter mingled with Rebecca’s. He got out the shower.
Rooting out his mother’s funeral plan and will from the safe, he set them aside and went for a run. Pushing through his exhaustion, the burn and strain cut his body, and he settled into the rhythm. The usual clarity of thought didn’t come, there was nothing but flashes of the past, and despite the chaos of his mind, he was empty.
When he reached home, sweating and shattered, Rebecca was in the den, eating cereal. She stood and turned off the telly. “Sorry, I didn’t know where you were, I hope you don’t mind.”
“Not at all, make yourself at home.” Staring at her, he knew he’d ask her to move in with him. She’d have to. He saw everything that would follow. Her dependence. Her resentment maybe. Office every day. Rebecca at home waiting for him.
She frowned in the silence as he stared and sat back down.
He thought quickly, deciding what to do. There weren’t many choices, but they only had each other, and he needed her.
Wiping the sweat from his face with his t-shirt, he knelt in front of her. “How about we go and get your things today so you can move in.”
Rebecca tilted her head with a little frown. “What?”
“There’s no point you staying at mum’s. I’ll have to clear it out.”
Getting a Life (New City Series Book 4) Page 13