Nandita tried to stop crying, but the tears just kept coming. She couldn’t believe what was happening. This wasn't supposed to happen. Had Ravi just told her he loved her? He had told her he loved her and then left her. Why? Oh yeah, Hank. He would never forgive this.
She looked frantically at Claire, who nodded at her and moved quickly toward the two men now shaking hands. Satish eyed Hank with suspicion while Hank smiled broadly at Satish. He was such a nice guy.
“Nandita’s apartment is just over there,” Claire pointed. “Why don’t we walk over there so she can rest a bit?”
“Good idea.” Hank looked at her, his eyes crinkling into a sympathetic smile. “I think we need to have a discussion about our arrangement.”
They came through the door to her apartment, and the tiny space seemed overwhelmed by the four of them. She walked straight to the kitchen to put the kettle on, still trying hard to stifle her sobs, when Hank spoke behind her.
“I’m not staying, Nan,” he said. “This is a family issue, and I’m not family.” He smiled at Satish and Claire before he continued, “I’m not even sure I should be. I couldn’t live with myself, knowing I had come between young love as passionate as what I just witnessed.” He picked up her hand. “I’ve enjoyed your company, Nandita. You’re a very special young woman, and it was a real privilege to spend time with you, but I can’t marry you. Find your man and tell him you’re sorry. Life has given you a tremendous gift, and you need to grab happiness while you can.” He turned to leave the apartment.
“Hank, wait!” Nandita called. “This doesn’t change anything! I still need to marry you—I mean, I still want to marry you. Please don’t go.”
Hank crossed to her and put his hands on her shoulders. “I’m still your friend, Nan, and I’ll be here for anything you need, but a man of good conscience can’t ignore true love when he sees it.” He turned to Satish and Claire. “It was truly an honor to meet you. You have a wonderful sister.”
Nandita watched as Hank left the room and felt equal parts relief and panic. She wasn’t in control—this wasn't what was supposed to happen. She had lost control of everything, including her feelings.
She moved to the couch and Satish and Claire moved to sit on either side of her. Satish pulled her into a half-hug while Claire handed her a wad of tissues she had found in her purse.
“Really Nan, a green card marriage? What gave you that idiotic idea?” Satish chuckled a little and she felt relieved that he wasn’t screaming.
“Sally,” she said. “Sally was going to pay for it.”
Satish and Claire exchanged looks over her head. She could almost feel Claire’s eyes roll.
“Since when do you follow Sally’s advice?” she asked. “Haven’t you seen enough of the aftermath to know her ideas are usually mad?” Claire shook her head in disbelief. “This idea, though… this one trumps them all. I’m going to have to have a word with her.”
Nandita blew her nose. “Don’t be mad at her, Claire. After she found out she was pregnant, she wanted to change her mind, but I wouldn’t let her. I think she made the offer with her pregnancy brain and then she couldn’t get out of it.”
She sat back and looked at Satish. Was he mad? He just looked concerned, but he had been furious when he'd thought it was a normal engagement. She thought this would have pushed him over the edge.
“Are you mad?” she asked him.
Satish sighed, “Not as mad as your friend on the sidewalk.” He smiled at her. “Who was he, Nan?”
“That’s Ravi, the guy I thought was following me at the beginning of the summer. We bumped into each other a few times, and now I’m not sure if he was following me, or if we were just meant to meet—like fate, you know? We hit it off really well, and we’ve been… dating, I guess. We had a fight the other night though and he basically told me he’s not interested and that I should just do my own thing. I’m not sure why he was so angry just now.” She felt herself filling with tears again and held out her hand for more tissues. Claire passed them over.
“He seemed pretty interested to me, Nan, and he seemed shocked to find you with Hank,” Satish said. “Did you keep that from him?”
She nodded miserably.
Her brother had his thoughtful look on. She'd seen it before when he was trying to solve a particularly difficult problem at work or home. He went very quiet and his face went blank—the only movements were his restless eyes and the wrinkles that popped up between his eyebrows when he half-frowned. She'd seen that expression earlier today when she'd glanced out the restaurant window and saw them with Ravi. What had they been talking about? How had he known who they were? What was he doing there in the first place?
When she explained about Ravi just now, she’d realized how silly it had sounded that they ‘just kept bumping into each other.’ She had forgotten the weirdness of their first few meetings in the rush of feelings she had for him. Now she realized maybe she should have asked more questions.
“What did you fight about?” Satish finally spoke.
Nandita started picking at her nails—a horrible habit that only kicked in when she was nervous or stressed. How much should she tell? She had carefully guarded the details of her Princeton life since she had arrived here, wanting to prove that she was capable of living alone without their constant support, or in Satish’s case, constant hounding. Now she’d made a royal mess of everything, though.
Maybe she could throw herself at the mercy of Satish. Maybe this would be the moment he decided to take pity on her and sponsor her visa and then her problems would be solved. Well, almost all of them. She pictured Ravi’s face again with the look of total betrayal and choked back a sob. He had been so upset. Why, if he wanted her to go back to India, would he be so devastated? If he loved her like he said, why was he sending her away?
“He said I should go back to India. After everything I told him about what I wanted and how I felt, he still thought I should go back. He sounded just like you, Satish!”
Satish smiled at her and said, “Well, then I suppose he was trying to put your best interests before his own.” He stood. “We have to go, Claire.”
Claire looked up in surprise. “What? We just got here, and Nan is sad.”
Satish looked at her. “Nandita needs some time to figure out why she would be willing to break the hearts of her entire family by entering into an arranged marriage with a stranger. Only a few years ago, she ran from a very thoughtful and considered match with a good family, made by the people who love her and not by strangers and a database.” He put his hand out to Claire and lifted her to his feet. “I understand marrying for love, Nandita.” He looked at Claire and smiled, “I think that’s obvious. To marry as a business transaction, however, with no thought toward a long-lasting and successful partnership is wrong.”
So he was angry—that much was clear—but he had no clue what he was talking about. He didn’t know how it felt to be stuck with no choices and no options. He was acting like her father.
“Maybe it’s best you do leave.” Nandita stood and tried hard to hold back her tears. She wanted to look strong and in control, even though she wasn’t even close.
38
Claire – The Conspiracy
“I think I know who that man is.” Satish strode so quickly toward the car that Claire had trouble keeping up. She'd wanted to say something nurturing and kind to Nandita, but Satish had practically pulled her arm off getting her out of there, and now she was jogging after him like a puppy. He had left before they’d even gotten the whole story. What was going on? How could they help Nan if they didn’t know everything?
“Who? Hank?” Claire panted.
“No, the other one, Not Hank.”
“Why would you know him?” Claire asked. She stumbled over the curb on her way to the passenger side and felt a flash of irritation. “Satish, can you slow down?”
He looked at her over the top of the car and paused. “You’re right, Claire: we need to slow dow
n. Nothing will happen too quickly.”
Inside the car, the noise of Palmer Square was satisfyingly muted. She felt like she could finally think. “What won’t happen quickly, and what do you mean you think you know who Not Hank is? You’re confusing me, babe.”
Satish didn’t start the car. Instead, he sat there for a few minutes with his thinking face on; he gave one final frown before his face cleared. “I don’t want to tell you everything I’m thinking, Claire, just in case I’m wrong.” He turned in his seat. “What I can tell you is that I think Not Hank has something to do with my father.” His frown returned and Claire reached out a thumb to smooth the wrinkles. Satish kept frowning, though. “The only thing I can’t figure out is how he could be stalking Nan. How would he know where she even lives? Unless my father told him… but how would he know where she was?”
Claire snatched her hand away from his brow as a horrible thought descended on her. Nandita’s mother always wanted so many details! She had assumed it was because she wanted to look up those locations and picture Nandita’s life for herself, but what if that wasn’t true? What if she had been sharing these details with Satish’s father, by either force or coercion? She assumed Satish thought his father had been directing Nandita’s stalker, Not Hank, but what if it wasn’t his father? What if it was his mother?
“They’re using him to persuade her to go back to India!” Claire hadn’t meant to say that out loud—it had just popped into her brain, and she’d spoken before thinking.
“They? Who?” Satish grabbed her hand to get her attention. “What do you mean, Claire?”
Oops! Now she was in trouble. She should have told Satish sooner about the email contact with his mother, but she’d been waiting. She figured if she could get her to agree to come to the wedding, then that piece of good news might soften the blow that she'd been keeping a secret from him. Now she was caught. When she told him about her secret correspondence under the present circumstances, he was not going to be happy. Man, this whole thing was so screwed up!
“I think he may have known all the details of Nan’s whereabouts from me.”
“You know Not Hank?” Satish said in confusion. “Wait, you do know him! You recognized him when we arrived at the restaurant.”
“I don’t know him. I just recognized him because I saw them together once after she pointed him out as her stalker.” She thought Satish would be mad that she hadn’t mentioned this before, but he was too distracted by his current train of thought.
“You just said Not Hank might have gotten the details from you, though. What are you talking about?”
“No, I didn’t mean Not Hank, I meant your father. I think he may have gotten Nandita’s details from me. I’ve been emailing your mother.”
Satish looked so perplexed that Claire almost laughed. Yeah, that wouldn’t help the situation. “You’ve been…” he started, confused, “but my mother doesn’t know how to email. She doesn’t have a computer.”
“No, but her friend Vishna does. She emails me on the way back from the market.”
“Why are you emailing my mother, and why didn’t you tell me? Why didn’t she tell me? I speak to her almost every day!”
Claire shifted uncomfortably in her seat. She had to admit it did sound a bit like a conspiracy. “It wasn’t meant to be like, a conspiracy or anything. It’s just that she misses Nan, and wants to hear all about her life. Your father won’t let Nan talk to her anymore, and I just thought that, if I could use our mutual love for Nan to build a relationship, I might be able to persuade her to come to the wedding. I know how important that is to you.”
Satish reached out a hand and gently twisted his fingers into her curls, pulling her toward him for a kiss. He held her there, only inches from his face, and said, “You're always so thoughtful, Claire.” He shook his head and chuckled a little. “I understand what you were trying to do and I love you for it—I love everything about you—but unfortunately, in this case, you may have been wrong. I think we can fix it though.” He moved his hands to the wheel and started the car. As he pulled into traffic, he continued, “I tell my mother everything there is to know about Nandita. I can’t say I’ve ever shared addresses with her, but she gets plenty of information from me to make her feel close to Nandita’s life. My mother would never share this with my father. Also, she can’t use email, and as far as I know, she doesn’t have a friend named Vishna.”
Claire was confused. If she hadn’t been emailing Satish’s mother, who had she been talking to these past few months? Had her emails somehow put Nandita in danger? Not Hank seemed to have real feelings for Nandita, but what if he was some mentally deranged stalker? What if it was Not Hank she had been emailing with the details of Nan’s life? She felt her stomach drop and her fists clench with anxiety. She couldn’t even look in Satish’s direction.
“Oh God, Satish. I am so sorry!”
“It’s okay, sweetheart.” He took one hand off the wheel and grasped hers. “I think I can figure this all out. I just need to make a few phone calls.”
39
Nandita – The Bottom
Nandita slammed the door after Satish and Claire and slid to the floor. Her anger swirled around her chest for a few minutes until it finally drained from her like a whirlpool, leaving only sadness in its place. She started to cry again. What had she done?
Ravi’s devastated face had a grip on her memory. She shook her head, trying to loosen his grip, but there he was. She had hurt him. Satish had been right: she was selfish, thoughtless, and a terrible person. She remembered Ravi’s words, then: he had called her a liar! How dare he call her a liar when he had been the one to let her down first? He had been the one who told her she wasn’t worth fighting for and that she should just go to India and get out of his sight. What did he expect her to do, sit in her apartment and cry until the day of her flight? She was a strong woman who made her own choices, and she had chosen to move on. How could he be angry when he was the one who’d left her? She remembered his face again and that look of agony, but she shook her guilt and pain away.
Nandita made a cup of coffee, crashed on her couch facing the large patio windows, and watched Palmer Square move from afternoon into evening. The men and women in business suits and fat briefcases bumped into Laura Ashley-clad housewives out for their daily boutique run, and then the crowd morphed into young professionals rushing into bars like animals finally freed from their cages. Later, teenagers lounged around the newspaper booth on Nassau Street, playing hacky sack and disappearing and reappearing on their skateboards as they wasted away another glorious summer evening. Eventually, they disappeared for good, probably just making their curfew.
The light faded as Nandita sat and stewed. She was back where she had started. Why couldn’t she solve this problem? She needed Ravi—craved Ravi. As a fresh batch of tears started, she marveled at how she could have so much liquid inside of her. Would she cry herself dry?
She reached over and grabbed her cup to take a sip of her coffee before almost spitting it over the sofa. Cold. How long had she been sitting here? It was no good moping—it was time for action. She crossed to her cell phone and dialed Hank’s number.
“Nandita,” he answered with warmth in his voice.
“Hi, Hank.”
“Are you okay, sweetie? It’s been a rough day for you. How did it go with Satish?”
“Are you backing out on me, Hank? I thought we were friends.” She moved back to the sofa and sat with a thump of dejection.
“We are friends, Nandita. That’s why I can’t marry you.”
She stood again, her frustration making her restless. “That doesn’t make any sense, Hank. We like each other, and we're both aware that this is a business arrangement. Why would you care if someone else had feelings for me?”
“Sweetie, I don’t want you to think I’m patronizing you, so please take what I’m about to say as truthful, honest advice. I’ve been around the block a few more times than you, and I’ve been in
love before. It was glorious, but for me, it didn’t work out. I decided to go into this green card business for one selfish reason and one altruistic reason. I wanted to help someone have the life they dreamed of, but I also hoped this kind of arrangement would help me find love, since the traditional methods seemed to have failed me. Now, I’m not dumb—I know I’m not worthy of a girl as intelligent and beautiful as you—but I hoped an arrangement like this would give you the time and opportunity to see if you could have feelings for me.”
“Hank, I…”
“No, please, let me finish. It’s important you hear this next part.” Nandita stopped her pacing and moved to the window. She looked down at the building entrance and had a sudden image of a flustered, sweaty Ravi banging on that door, just so she would open it and he could kiss her. Hank continued, “I know what real love is supposed to look like—I saw it today. I can’t give you the life you dreamed of because I can’t give you that.”
“I can’t be with him Hank. He hates me! He's never going to speak to me again. If you don’t marry me, I’ll have to leave the country, and then I won’t have a life, at all. It makes more sense to marry you!”
Hank chuckled on the other end of the phone. “Nan, if that man hates you, then I’m Barney, the purple dinosaur. Believe me, sweetie, love has a way of working these things out. You need to go to him and apologize for whatever wrong you have done and forgive him for what you think he’s done to you. You don’t need this old man.”
She was angry now and had to resist the urge to open her patio doors and throw her cell phone across the square. “Everyone is trying to control me,” Nandita muttered.
Hank was quiet for a minute until he spoke with such gentleness that it pricked at the guilt around the edges of Nandita’s indignation. “I don’t know what happened with Satish today, but all I saw was a man trying to do his best for his sister and a sister-in-law whose heart was hurting for you. Don’t push people away. You say ‘control,’ I say ‘protect,’ and they are very different words.”
Uncharted (Jersey Girls Book 3) Page 17