by S. E. Jakes
When I thought I’d been saving Billy . . . it’d been Ryker.
Billy would’ve been pissed to think I’d put him between us. Ryker was my second chance. My redemption. My fucking everything. “Jesus.”
“Come on, Sean.” Ryker was easing the gun from my knotted grip. “Can you pull it together and grab Donna? Get her back to her charter?”
“Where are you going?”
“To end this shit. Trust me.”
I did, and not because I didn’t have a choice.
He did give me the gun back, and I found Donna in a backroom, tied to a chair.
She had a bruise on her cheek, looked like she was in shock, but otherwise she was fine. Physically.
I untied her while Ryker took care of the last of the guards in the main part of the warehouse, and when the coast was clear, Ryker grabbed one of the kidnappers, who he’d tied up. He put the guy in his own car and drove that away, but not before telling me, “Get her home, Sean, because then you’re coming home with me.”
Nothing had changed, except my perspective. It’d shifted, upright. I saw things as Ryker did. Because he’d always seen things my way.
I was delivering the girl now, and the car later. Ryker trusted me to do this first part alone, and I wasn’t going to fuck it up.
Donna was so quiet on the ride to the assigned meeting place, where her husband would be waiting. Casey said he’d practically had to tie the guy down to keep him from coming with us, and that, I understood.
I turned the radio on, low, and I’d given her something to drink. I’d jacked up the heat because she was shivering a little. About half an hour into the hour-long drive, she asked, “How long have you been with Ryker?”
“That obvious?” I asked.
She laughed a little. That was a relief to me. “You’re not Havoc.”
“No.”
“Probie?”
“No. I’ve just got a propensity to get into major trouble. And I like stealing cars,” I added.
“So how did you meet Ryker?”
“At Bertha’s. I was nervous. And I’m never nervous.” I didn’t know why the fuck I was telling her this. Probably because she’d just been rescued from being kidnapped, and she was scared we’d be caught before we made it back to the man she loved. “So I drank way too much tequila. And I uh . . . I told him that it was cool if he took me home at the end of the night. Jesus.”
She put a hand on my arm. “Sounds like you knew he was right from minute one.”
“I’ve been fighting it.”
“Here.” She tapped the side of my head. “Heart knows what it wants anyway. That night, you led with your heart.”
I blew out the breath I’d been holding. Because she was right. I was too immersed in it to see clearly. “He said he wouldn’t follow me.”
“But he did.”
“Yeah.”
I glanced over and she was staring straight ahead, smiling the serene smile of someone who knew a giant secret.
I guess I knew it too.
“My mom wasn’t happy that I didn’t find a guy at Havoc. I told her to look at the bright side—this was the best way to ensure that Havoc and the Hangmen didn’t go to war. I’d never let it happen.”
“Is that the whole reason you married a Hangmen?”
“I married for love, Rush. Because it’s the only thing worth doing anything for.”
“Even after all of this?”
“Even after,” she said softly. Because we’d pulled in, and her husband was headed her way. And that’s when she let her guard down. Tears ran down her cheeks. She wasn’t hysterical, but she did let go.
“I can’t thank you enough,” LT said. “Open invite. Any favor needed, anytime.”
I didn’t like favors, but this world—this MC world especially—lived by them. I shook his hand.
asey was going to pick the car up closer to the docks. After I dropped Donna off, I doubled back and waited three blocks away.
I was lying on the hood of the car, looking at the stars, when Ryker pulled up on his bike. He ambled over, stood over me and asked, “What’re you thinking about?”
He wasn’t going to let me get away with that not telling you shit stuff, but really, what could he do? I mean, I knew what he could do. He’d done what I was doing. He’d been there. And a part of me hated that he knew.
“Can’t get away with anything,” he murmured when I told him that. He smiled his slow, easy smile that told me he’d known that too.
Fucker. “You knew who I was long before last year, didn’t you?” I asked him finally.
“Yeah. I didn’t know that you were a car thief. I just knew you as the guy I saw in the clubs.”
“I never saw you.”
“I didn’t want to be seen. But you did.”
I couldn’t deny that. “So when you started watching me for Havoc last year . . .”
“I finally got my chance.”
“You were watching me as a job. So what, you were suddenly attracted to me?”
“I was always attracted to you.”
“So why not approach me before that?”
“Because you weren’t ready.”
Now I did turn to stare at him. “Seriously?”
“Yeah, seriously.”
At his words, I went to stand, but he pulled me down, half pinning me to the hood of the car.
“You weren’t ready. You were too wild.”
“I thought Havoc liked wild?”
“Not uncontrollable. You were.”
I’d been, yes, but fuck him for saying it. “There’s nothing wrong with that.”
“No, of course not. Nothing.” He was sincere. “But Sean, I couldn’t risk that.”
“Because of your family.”
“Yes.”
And we were right back where we started. “I don’t want to be a part of Havoc.”
“Do you want to be with me?”
I hadn’t wanted him to ask me that. At this point, I’d realized that I couldn’t live without him. That I’d be miserable. “Ryk . . .”
“Answer the question.”
Jesus, he was going to fuck me right out in the open. Right on the car.
Just like my fantasy. Except . . . “You said these cars are too smooth.”
“They are,” he said seriously. “You’re not. You’ll give me the rumble.” With that, he yanked me down toward him and unbuttoned my jeans. Stripped them off me, smiled at the fact that I wore nothing underneath.
“That’s convenient,” he said.
“Saves time.”
He raised his brows. “You’re only saving time for me, Sean. And I’d better hear you say that.”
But he didn’t give me time for anything like that, began putting my legs over his shoulders, unzipping his pants and gloving his cock. And there was lube, on his fingers, inside of me . . . and then it was his cock, sliding into me. Filling me.
“Missed this,” I managed.
“Being fucked on a car?”
“Being fucked . . . by you. Only. You.”
On the warm hood of the car we’d stolen together, he took me, hard and fast, and I watched him, imagined that people were watching us. Watching him take me.
I went to grab my cock, but he shook his head. I reached out to the side, but there was nothing to grab.
“Touch your nipples if you need to hold on to something,” Ryker instructed. I did. Ryker’s were pierced, and I loved tugging on them. Turns out mine were pretty sensitive too.
“You think I don’t realize what you did?” Ryker told me now.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Bullshit, Sean. Bullshit.” He held me down, thrust into me until all I could do was moan. “Tell me why.”
“Ryk . . .”
“Tell. Me.”
“For you, okay. So . . . fuck. I left so you didn’t have to choose.”
“I never had to choose, Sean. No one asked me to. I can have you both. And
I will.”
“It wasn’t . . . always easy for you.”
“It wasn’t. It won’t be. But nothing worth having ever is,” he growled. “And you’re worth having.”
His words sent a shudder through me. My cock bobbed helplessly. Leaking. Red and angry, and he was hitting the right spot and he wouldn’t stop until I came.
I did, with a strangled groan, splayed for him, the most painfully satisfying orgasm of my life.
He came a minute later, shouting my name. In that half-empty parking lot, where anyone could’ve seen us. We stayed in that position. I couldn’t have said for how long. I was stunned. Submissive for him. And when he pulled out, he dressed me, got on his bike and waited for me to settle my weight behind him . . . just as Casey showed to claim the car.
I held on to Ryker, even though I didn’t need to, and I buried my flushed face against his Havoc cut. By the time we got back to my place, my ass was sore, but I was hard for him again.
e fucked me in the shower, gentler this time. The soreness didn’t matter, not when he kissed me the way he did.
He rubbed my hair dry with a towel. I had one wrapped around my hips as well. His fingers ran along my ribs, tracing a spot that was particularly sensitive on a good day. He was writing something there, then drawing. Then he placed his large hand over it, splayed out to span the expanse of skin like he was measuring.
And then he nodded, took his hand away, like he’d made a decision.
I knew what that decision had been when Gavin came in—the one who’d done Ryker’s roses.
I lay partially on my side, with Ryker behind me, propping me up.
Gavin drew freehand over my ribcage using black marker with shades of gray, although he told me that the final version would have color. For twenty minutes, we were all quiet, and then he smiled at me, nodded at Ryker, and left.
I hadn’t looked while Gavin was drawing. Now, Ryker urged me up and pointed to the mirror.
The drawing spanned exactly where his hand had been, although a few tribal swirls had escaped the confines of the space. The way it was drawn went perfectly over the planes of my body. It moved with me, looked like I was born with it there.
It was amazing, even though there wasn’t color yet. A rose. A skull. My very own American Beauty. Not an exact replica. No, this was an original.
“Original, like you are,” Ryker said, reading my mind. “Perfect spot. I knew it the first time I touched you.”
That first night, his hand had strayed there. Stayed there, played on me, holding me.
I’d started to swear I could feel his heavy hand there, even after he left. When I’d still been enlisted, I’d sleep with my hand there for comfort.
It was why he’d looked so angry when he’d seen the bruises there. “Does this make me yours?”
“This makes you you.” He paused. “Do you want it to mean that?”
“Yeah.”
“You don’t have to. That’s for you—a gift.”
“Suppose I wanted the ink to make me yours?”
“You’re mine, Sean, ink or no ink. You know that, right?”
“I want the ink to remind me. I want that to be a part of me.”
He grabbed me, tugged me to him, and kissed me. “My tough guy.”
“Yeah.” I rolled my eyes. “You know Billy did it for me. Stepped in front of me in the desert to save me from insurgent fire.”
“His choice, Sean.”
“That’s what bothered me. He took it all into his own hands. I could’ve . . .”
“Died. You could’ve died, Sean. I know accepting what he did for you is hard, but you’re too hard on yourself.”
“I know that.” I did. Really. Didn’t mean it was going to change anytime soon.
Ryker took that opportunity to splay his hand over my side, stroking the drawing. My skin. “Going to be here to remind you not to be.”
“I love you, Ryk. Probably from the first time you broke in. Definitely from the night you helped me.”
“We’re good together, Sean. Really good.” He cupped the back of my neck. “You know I love you.”
I did. He’d been saying it in a thousand different ways from the start, and I’d been running. In circles, it appeared. And he’d waited until I wore myself out.
Or until my brain cleared. “What do I do?”
He smiled, and I knew then that he wouldn’t take away my freedom. “I’ve got an idea.”
“Is it an idea . . . or something you’ve already done?”
“It’s both. I’ve already discussed it with Noah. I figured you wouldn’t mind.”
“You and Noah, talking?” I raised my eyebrows. “And Noah’s still . . . unbruised?”
“He’s dating Casey’s daughter, which isn’t something I’d recommend to him, but I didn’t add any additional bruises to him.” Ryker paused. “Edmund’s gone. But his shop’s still there. The town needs it. So it’d be a shame to let it go to waste.”
“So what, Noah and I should run it?”
“Run it. Own it.”
“You’re serious?” I stared into his dark eyes. “I’d have to steal a lot of cars to afford that.”
“Shit, no. Please.” Ryker’s expression was genuinely pained. “I knew that’s how you’d think, so I went ahead and loaned you the money.”
“Ryker, I—“
“Loan. And you own it outright. You’ll pay me back as you can.”
“So what—the shop would be my front?”
Ryker rolled his eyes. “No, it’s where you’re supposed to be.”
I’d fix up Harleys and cars. With Noah. And that way I didn’t have to deal with Havoc or worry about how I’d take care of myself. “So I’d just own the place.”
“The customers keep coming back for you.”
That was true. In the year I’d been there, I’d become the most asked-for mechanic. Some of the guys were almost scared of their cars. They rode shotgun while I drove them. Rode their cars the way they needed to be ridden. Broke them in.
“You can’t be bought, Sean. Never could.”
he car ride home was kind of a blur. Ryker drove my truck while I slept on and off, the Havoc bikes guiding us home. To Havoc. The Harleys fell away once we got up the hill, and he parked in front of his house.
It felt like I’d been gone years. The crocuses were still there, blooming where they shouldn’t be. Welcoming me back. “I’m worried, Ryk,” I told him.
He shut the truck off and shifted to face me. “I know Greta told you how badly I fucked up when I was younger. How much trouble I brought down on the MC.”
“Yeah. But that was once. You learned. I seem to have an issue with learning from anything I even moderately enjoy.”
“Look, selflessness isn’t what I’m after. I don’t think you’d do anything to hurt the kids, no matter how strong your urge to steal is.”
He was right.
“Did you want to leave?” he offered.
“No.” I stared at him. “I’m fucking miserable without you. I’m miserable not being a criminal.”
“I’d say you’re more of a delinquent than a criminal. But I think there’s a way we can work it to our advantage.”
“Does it involve more of me getting fucked on the hood of a car?”
“It could.” He paused. “I wasn’t sure you liked it. I mean, yelling out that you’re going to fucking kill me with your dick can be taken a lot of ways.”
“I did not yell that out.”
Ryker waited until I had soda in my mouth before adding, “Linc and Gypsy are fucking.”
I spit the drink out. Ryker looked satisfied. I wiped my mouth with the back of my hand. “Fucker.”
“Me or Linc?”
“Both of you.”
I shoved him lightly, and he laughed and got out of the truck. I did too, but I waited at the steps of the porch. He’d walked a few steps up but stopped and turned to me. Waited.
“I’m in love with you, Ryker. You know th
at, right?”
His face broke wide open with the most beautiful goddamned smile I’d ever seen on him. “Doesn’t mean I don’t love hearing it.”
I’d been bested at my own game. And I hadn’t been playing a game. Or at least I hadn’t meant to.
“You were protecting yourself,” Ryker said after I’d explained that.
“From who?”
“Everyone. Everything. You can’t get hurt if you can’t get close enough.”
“And neither can they,” I muttered.
“Right. Forgot you’ve got that kind of power.” He wasn’t making fun of me. He never did that.
“Feels like it sometimes.”
“I get that.” He paused. “I can’t promise that you’ll know everything about Havoc. There’s a lot we do. A lot one hand knows but the other doesn’t. It’s complicated.”
“We don’t have enough cars around here to steal.”
“We have a lot of rogue members,” he said. “We try to keep our nose clean on the compound.”
“Suppose I fuck things up?”
“Don’t,” he said seriously.
“Ryker . . .”
“We stand by our own. You’re with me, which means you’re a part of Havoc.”
Had I seen signs and closed my eyes against believing them? “Wait, you don’t steal cars?”
Ryker shook his head. “I did, a long time ago. But Havoc does. Like you said, who are we hurting?”
I nodded, slowly. “You’re in charge of the porn?”
“No. I’ll bodyguard if need be, but I don’t deal with it day-to-day.”
“The kid stuff,” I said finally.
“Yeah.”
I stared at him. Because that was hands down the hardest, most dangerous job of all.
“Am I one of your lost boys?”
“You’re not a boy, Sean. And you’re not lost. Never were, really.” He pressed a kiss to the side of my neck. “I love you, Sean Rush. Come on inside with me, and never fucking leave, okay?”
“So I’m home.” It was more a statement than a question, but he reassured me anyway, like he always did.
“Yeah, babe. You’re home.”
Dear Reader,
Thank you for reading SE Jakes’ Running Wild!