by Andrea Höst
I can see where Kaoren inherited his love of being in charge.
Arden was less forceful, but more disconcerting. He's very like Kaoren, but with longer hair, and a tendency to mock and to ask uncomfortably insightful questions. Not quite Kaoren's evil alternate universe twin, but definitely Kaoren if he hadn't decided outright arrogance wasn't useful. But he's as protective of Siame as Kaoren is, and wants her to choose to do whatever she prefers to do, rather than leave the Setari simply because their mother wants it, or stay in the Setari because Kaoren wants it. His strategy for this was to encourage her to paint while she was staying here – she immediately produced this hugely embarrassing portrait of me with my face all bruised, and my boot camp hair cut, talking to Nils lying smexily in the grass – conveniently leaving out everyone else who was sitting around that day. She's incredibly good, but not at all satisfied with her work, and Arden (and Muina) filled her head with possible painting subjects, until she was so deeply involved in trying to paint our waterfall pool that she wasn't finished when they were due to leave, so Siame's ended up staying with us to explore her art rather than be a Kalrani. I don't think Kaoren's mother's fooled by Arden's machinations in the slightest, but so long as Siame's painting she's happy.
They haven't decided if they'll actually move to Muina themselves, and I don't know how I feel about the idea. It'll be months and months before I can even tell my own Mum that it might be possible for her to come here. [Now I'm picturing Teor trying to organise my Mum, which would so not work. Mum goes her own way.]
The fortnight the Ruuels were here was so filled with things happening that we avoided anything more than the occasional frowning match. Lohn and Mara's relatives arrived the same day as the Ruuels, and we'd offered our two spare guest rooms (Kaoren's family were using the "future kids" rooms) to handle some of their overflow. We ended up with Lohn's sister Elha and her husband and three kids, just until the temporary wedding guests went home. Two twin girls Sen's age and a boy a year older, which was a most wonderful development in Sen's view. And Mara's brother had two sons around Rye's age, and Ketzaren had a much younger brother of around fifteen, and Jeh's sister had three girls ranging from nine to fourteen. And then there was Zee's brother's kids, and Maze's extended family (including Helese's relatives), and Alay's younger brother, and Kisikar, who had retired from First, and Grif's nephews and it was just so amazingly many people, all eagerly setting up house and then wanting to be taken on tour and have meet and greets and pre-wedding events.
Everybody (including me and Kaoren) had taken leave so we could play tour guide, and we mostly travelled with Kaoren and Maze's families, and Kisikar, and every day a different place – Pandora highlights and Kalasa and Mesiath, and then the two newly seeded towns – Zurenath (the place with all the whiteberry bushes in the southern hemisphere, which they think will be very good for farming) and Liriath in the northern hemisphere, which I think would match Spain in terms of proximity to the equator. The trees there are low and dark, and there were black hills looming at the edges of the huge flat valley centred around the platform town.
Lohn and Mara's wedding was super-traditional, apparently. Kaoren had brought back formal clothes for all of us (girls dress pretty much like the boys when they're ultra-traditional, in layered robes of neutral shades). There are rituals for the two days beforehand – little formal exchanges of gifts and items. Mara made this huge flat cake and her father delivered it to Lohn's family's (brand-spanking new) house where they practically pickled it in alcohol in readiness for the wedding. Then the next day Lohn delivered Mara's wedding robes to Mara's family's house (after spending weeks trying to get some kind of symbolic piece of stitching on the back just right). Then on the wedding day all the bride and groom's close friends showed up at their respective houses and stole them off to do a preparation ceremony. I'm not sure if the guys did exactly the same to Lohn, but we pretty much gave Mara a bath – dressing her in this thin shift and pouring warm scented water over her and drying her and then painting all these purplish decorations all over her face and throat and arms – curling tendrils. Everyone there does a tiny piece of the decoration, and you're supposed to luck-wish the marriage while you're doing it. Then (after blotting her dry) we dressed her in the robes Lohn had brought and took turns combing her hair and putting pieces of jewellery on her and then we blindfolded her and delivered her up to the little whitestone pavilion in their park for the ceremony.
Lohn was there, also covered in decorations and dressed in robes and reeking of the scented water, standing in a row with Maze and Grif and Nils and her brother and a cousin, and Mara had to pick the right one just by squeezing all their hands in turn. Nils told me Mara would have to get married to whoever she picked, but I don't believe him, and she knew which one was Lohn anyway – the citrusy scent of the ritual water gives the groom away.
We all sat about on cushions and rugs (or rocks and benches for grandparents) and watched Mara offer Lohn her name, and Lohn accept it, and their parents made little speeches and accepted their new son or daughter, and so Lohn is now Lohn Senez. Then we all ate a piece of the very alcoholic cake, and had a huge picnic which lasted till the afternoon got too cold for us to be outside any longer. [Autumn is now well advanced, and we get warm enough days, but cold evenings.]
Lohn and Mara had included their kids and ours in their getting-dressed ceremony, and Sen naturally adored that, and Lira and Ys didn't nearly manage to pretend they weren't touched and awed by the whole thing. Rye was all pink and blushing. Fein and Shar have been wholly overwhelmed by Mara and Lohn's families, who have embraced them in no uncertain terms, and there were plenty of games for the kids as part of the post-wedding picnic. I think having a lot of Taren kids (and even some Kolaren ones thanks to a few of Squad One's families being invited) introduced into the mix is benefiting Ys and Rye immensely. The idea of being 'just a servant' is wholly against Taren philosophies, simply not on the radar. Ys and Rye are Caszandra and Kaoren's wards, brave and exotic and not for a moment to be dismissed because of the length of their names.
I think it's helping Shar, too, to be Shar instead of Sharlotsofsyllables – just some thirteen year-old boy. He's going to grow up to be a serious and leaderly person, and Place Sight really is something which it can be a struggle to live with, but Lohn and Mara are giving him some quality just-a-kid time as well as helping him with the strange politics which comes with his name. [A terribly complicated situation, since he's basically a member of the ruling family who was left to die with the crowd, instead of joining whatever it was the Nuran Cruzatch allies were trying to achieve.]
Sen tore about madly, got wholly overexcited, and then came and smothered me in very sticky kisses – I think that was thanks for how happy Rye was, chatting with a half-dozen boys his own age about Muinan animals and the park design and canoeing, and making arrangements to teach them to swim. [We've since had the whole pack over to our island, for a mass swimming lesson, and gone over to Siriath for another.] Ys and Lira didn't embrace popularity so completely, but they weren't hostile or rude either, and I was very pleased to see that Ys had decided to be protective of Enna and make sure she wasn't overwhelmed – that's Ys all over.
The Setari-relatives' children will be attending the talent school as well – most of them have near-Setari level talents or were even washed out of the Setari program early on. I'm really glad of that, of the changes it should bring to the school, and the opportunities it will give Ys and Rye to be around some peers they haven't erected huge walls against. Mara's brother's sons, Del and Serry, have joined Fein as Rye's closest compadres, and they fill what few moments he had left spare. Sen, of course, considers everyone around her age as belonging to her. Ys and Lira are polite, but for the moment enjoying their own friendship most.
I eventually got a bit exhausted from all the socialising, and Kaoren and I have been having a quiet week this week. We also wanted Sen to have a break from so many people. She thoroughly enjoyed the wedd
ing, was brimming over with joy, but this is also an effect of her Sights – being surrounded by radiantly happy people is a bit like swilling champagne. Psychic children are complicated.
Mara came over today for a bit of peace and quiet as well. First and Second Squad are really enjoying living with their families near them, but their places can get pretty raucous. We sat out on the balcony (Maze and Alay were my guards) and talked about the transformation Siriath – and all of Muina – has undergone in such a short time. I still feel guilty about it sometimes, particularly when I found out that my otters seem to have moved away from their stream – or died – and that KOTIS Command is talking about settling Border Collie-ville next.
Maze is looking very alive and non-tired these days, and full of plans to turn his bit of Siriath into a test ground for his landscaping ideas. He's been doing courses in his spare time, and takes very seriously the time he spends with Rye, who had a lot of practical experience on Nuri (at least until the bastard head of his house realised how much he loved gardening and wouldn't let him tend the vegetables any more). Rye and Maze are actually doing a couple of the same courses, and while Rye struggles a little with reading (he does okay, but it's not quick and natural for him yet and he has to use the text-to-speech facility a lot), he's picking up the scientific concepts quite well for a kid of twelve. [Rye's not able to do the level of courses that Maze is doing, yet, but they can both attend all the 'practical farming' courses which the 'university' is running. Re-learning how to farm Muina, and getting large-scale food production established, is a very important part of KOTIS' settlement plans.]
The kids came home while Mara was still here (we've more than a couple of boats between us now – simple covered sleds that are slow but easy to drive about – and we rotate kid-collection). I could tell from the way Sen behaved that Alay was, as I'd suspected, not feeling nearly as happy with the world as everyone else. She's always been 'the quiet one' of First Squad – she isn't shy, is actually pretty decisive and definite about things, but she's the least chatty. Since Nils told me about how she'd loved one of the Setari killed by the massive – Suzlein – I've wondered whether part of the reason Alay's quiet is the same as the reason Maze is (or was) sad.
The way Nils talked about him, I don't think Alay was very in love with her technician, which is probably a good thing because so far I haven't seen any sign that he's coming to Muina to be with her. Perhaps she cared about him more than Nils suggested, and that's why she's down, or maybe it's just because she's surrounded by romantic things, and the person she loved is dead.
She really likes Sen, though (everyone does!) and let herself get drawn into a silly game with Sen and the kittens and it was nice to see both of them laughing. Sen's had such a rough time of it the past couple of months, and still her first instinct is to cheer up anyone who isn't happy.
My kids are the best.
The Muinan new year is at the end of this month. The one-Muinan year anniversary of me telling the platform that Kaoren was Muinan. We'll be going into Muina Year 2, and there's plans for all sorts of ceremonies and I have turned down numerous invitations. Still going to celebrate, will maybe start a tradition of a New Year's Cake or something.
Chapter 7
June
June 24
Sudden Developments
Picture me wide-eyed. Scarcely know what to think.
I'd noticed that when Maze schedules people to be my babysitter, he's usually obliging about sticking couples together – Nils and Zee, for instance. Not Lohn and Mara together any more, since they adopted, but he'll usually pair Ketz and Jeh, or Ketz and Grif. And Mori with Ro, since Eighth is currently stationed on Muina. Maze obviously knows all about people's love lives. I thought that scheduling himself and Alay together semi-frequently was just because they were 'left-overs' and didn't have kids to look after.
They never acted like there was anything to it, but a short time after the wedding I noticed that Maze and Alay were awake long after midnight out on the balcony, and the next day Alay was even quieter than usual, looking like she was doing some hard thinking. And she was weirdly awkward with Maze, which naturally made me curious.
Maze didn't schedule himself or Alay to be my bodyguard for nearly a month, but when he did, it was both of them together again. Sen was going through a bad patch, so I was distracted during the evening, and the most I thought was that Alay looked a bit stressed and I wondered if I'd upset her because she almost looked like she wished she wasn't there.
Quite late in the night, though, when I'd gotten up to fetch Sen – who had woken from her latest nightmare and was just lying there all wrecked – I noticed that Alay was in Maze's room. Terrible timing for me – when Sen's in such a bad state, I have to concentrate myself on totally supportive thoughts and just try and project safety to her – it's the only thing that seems to help. So I couldn't let myself obsess over it nearly as much as I wanted to.
When Kaoren woke me in the morning I instantly checked where Maze and Alay were, but Maze had gone for a walk down by the lakeshore, and Alay was back in her own room, asleep. Maze seemed totally normal – maybe a little thoughtful – when he came back for breakfast, and when Alay came out and didn't even look at him I was starting to think maybe they'd just been discussing missions or something. In the middle of the night. Really close together.
But then Sen (who was still very tired and subdued) suddenly brightened magnificently, and hopped off her chair so she could fling her arms around Alay (at thigh-level) and pronounce in ecstatic tones: "Baby!"
She'd used the English word, since it's something I sometimes call her when she's very upset, and Alay just looked confused. Maze knew the word though, and his eyes went rather wide, then he gave Alay one of his super-special smiles and obligingly translated. I think for a moment Alay was on the verge of just running away, but then she stroked Sen's head and looked at Kaoren, asking: "Can she really tell?"
Kaoren (who I think thought the whole thing super-funny, but was good about not showing it) nodded. "Pregnancies are very clear almost immediately from conception. Congratulations."
Alay looked hugely conflicted and put on the spot, but then bent down and hugged Sen and said "Thank you," and then she and Maze went down to the pool to talk (we've put a couple of benches in nooks down at the pool, and they seem to always attract couples, even though it's icy-cold outside these days). Sen took the opportunity to point out to me and Kaoren that here was proof that there was no need to wait until after a wedding to have babies and I had no more excuses (so much fun watching Siame's face whenever Sen starts insisting that Kaoren and I have babies NOW!). Kaoren then gave Sen – and the rest of us by proxy – a careful lecture about letting people make their own announcements, and respecting their privacy as much as possible, and Siame (very nicely) volunteered to take the kids off to school to clear them away.
Kaoren and I then had a brief exchange of "What the hell?" since neither of us saw this coming (which says something given Kaoren's Sights). We moved on to a fun discussion about him being able to know when I get pregnant before I do, and the invasive aspects of my powers, and of Sight talents, and why I never use my visualisation abilities to find out for sure what's going on – and whether Lira is likely to. But then he had to head out to meet his squad for an Ena mission.
Alay eventually came back without Maze, and I think was very glad that it was only me there stacking the dishwasher. I smiled at her and said: "Congratulations, too. Do you want me to pretend Sen didn't say that?"
I think she was kind of tempted, but instead shook her head and said: "That would be pointless."
I figured that Alay probably wanted some thinking time, since she wasn't exactly looking happy, and asked her to work out with me since I couldn't go out in the canoe (it's way too cold – will probably start snowing soon). I don't like working out much at all, but it's a useful preoccupation if you just want something to do and not talk. Of course, Alay could have been having plenty of l
ively discussions with people over the interface, but I kind of doubted it. She almost seemed like she didn't want to be pregnant, even though she would have had to have had the medics take away her contraception. And have had sex with Maze.
Of course I was boiling over with curiosity, and only managed to do a half-assed routine swapping from machine to machine, having to put all my energy into not gaping at Alay. Wasted effort, since Alay didn't even notice that I was managing one repetition a minute.
"Do you want a boy or a girl?" I finally asked, unable to keep my mouth shut any longer.
Alay blinked – I think she'd forgotten I was there – then said: "A girl. But…either."
"You'll make great parents. Sen loves playing with you."
"Sen loves playing with everyone," Alay said, amused, and then shook her head. "You must have no hope of keeping any secrets, with three Sight Sight talents in the house."
"Trying not to have secrets to keep," I said with a shrug. "I'm not sure Kaoren could be with me if I did. He sometimes even picks up when I'm planning birthday presents, and gets stressed about it. Sight Sight might conveniently explain things usefully sometimes, but when all it does is tell him there's something I haven't told him, it's really awful."
"He and Selkie are so good at not reacting to the things they must see that it's easy to underestimate just how much Sight Sight is telling them. I won't make that mistake again."
"Don't forget Lira's and my people-sense either," I said (getting all hot with embarrassment). "One of the reasons I was so happy to move away from Setari accommodation was because I just didn't need to know so much about who was sleeping with who. It's not a sense I can turn off, either." I paused, then added: "Are you going to get married?"
"I don't know. I didn't expect this to happen so quickly." She looked frustrated, then gave me a very dubious glance – I'm not a person she usually has personal conversations with. But I think she also didn't want to talk to Zee or Mara or Ketzaren or any of the people who have known her and Maze for years. "Maze will never stop loving Helese. They completed each other in a way that makes any other person impossible for him. And I – I lost someone too, and though I did try to pretend I could recover from that, I never have. I blame your children for this."