And neither would she. To Willie’s astonishment, Hattie climbed down. Clutching her belly, she hobbled toward the impasse.
“Hattie, stop!”
“Do something.” She sobbed the words. “We can’t stay here. I can’t have this baby here.”
She was becoming hysterical. Willie had to calm her. He had to calm himself, too, but had no idea what to do…other than accept the reality of their situation. “Honey, I’m sorry. There’s no way we can get around.”
“We have to move—”
“I can’t.” Even with two good legs, he wouldn’t have had strength enough to clear the road. He jumped down, landed with a thud, and hurried to enfold Hattie in his arms. “We have to stay calm. We’ll figure something out. Please, don’t cry.”
“I can’t help it. It hurts, Willie. It hurts, I’m scared, and I don’t know what we’re going to do.” Her body shook from head to toe. “There must be a way to get to town. Are you sure there’s not another road to take? For that matter,” she rushed on, pulling away and glancing around, “what difference does it make if we stay on the road? Can’t we cut through the fields? Can’t we just drive around…”
When he shook his head, she fell silent.
“The ground’s far too wet. We’d be mired down before we’d gone twenty feet.”
“But my time’s come. The baby’s not going to wait. I can’t just tell him—or her,” she added, “that this isn’t a very convenient time. Babies come when they’re ready, and this one’s ready,” she wailed as another pain grabbed hold of her.
Willie knew she couldn’t take much more pain.
“Get in the wagon. Lie down in back. I’ve never delivered a baby before, but—”
She shook her head vehemently. “No, you can’t.”
“Take deep breaths. Try to relax.” Paying no heed to her protests, Willie gathered her into his arms and guided her to the wagon again. “Calm down, Hattie.”
“That’s easy enough for you to say. You have no idea how much it hurts.” She clenched her hands. “I hate you Willie Morse. I wouldn’t be in all this pain if it weren’t for you, and I swear, I’ll never let you touch me again.”
“Hush, sweet. I know it hurts—”
“But you don’t know how much. That’s the trouble with you men. You don’t know what we go through. ‘Take a deep breath, relax, calm down.’ That’s all you can say.” Sarcastic words fired out of her mouth.
“Hattie, you don’t have to shout. I’m not deaf.”
“I’m not shouting!”
Dear, brave Hattie. She had to be in excruciating pain, otherwise she’d still be smiling, still spouting off pleasant platitudes, still doing her part to encourage him.
“This will be a memory, a story we’ll tell our children…and our children’s children,” he added, working quickly to spread blankets out over the floor of the wagon bed. “Everything’s going to be fine.” He eased her down then nudged the pillow beneath her head. “Women have been having babies for eons. It’s the most natural thing in the world, or so I’ve heard. In fact, I think you’ve said as much.” His mind raced, searching for words that might bring a measure of comfort to this frightened young woman. What did he really know about having babies? Nothing, except that from all accounts, it hurt like hell. “It will all be over soon,” he whispered, settling beside her and stroking her brow with a tender touch. “Think about how good it’s going to feel when you can hold our child in your arms. Think about how—”
Hattie’s screams shut off his words. Her hand flailed in the air, desperately searching for his. He grasped hold, laced his fingers with hers, and let her hold on.
“Take a deep breath. I’m right here. We’ll get through this together.”
Chapter Nineteen
The skies darkened around them, turning so dark it might have been night for all Willie knew. Hattie writhed in pain, clinging to him with a desperate grasp.
Something was wrong. Dreadfully wrong. Even though Willie had never been around a woman birthing a baby before, he knew it shouldn’t cause such agonizing screams, shouldn’t make the expectant mother thrash about the way Hattie was doing.
The terror that had been slowly creeping in now exploded. Willie gave Hattie’s shoulders a shake. “What is it? Talk to me. Tell me what’s happening.”
“The baby’s wrong-side-up.” She took hold of one of his hands and pressed it against her stomach. “See? The baby’s trying to come out feet first.”
He shook his head. “You’re imagining things. Babies don’t do somersaults and turn themselves around.”
“This one does.” Hattie’s eyes closed. “I won’t make it, Willie. Neither will the baby. We’re both going to die. I know that. I’ve accepted it. I’m sorry I failed. So sorry.”
“Hush, don’t talk like that.” He attempted to pry her fingers from his arm. “I won’t let you die. I’ll get help,” he told her, shouting now to be heard over her cries and the rumblings of thunder that shook the earth and skies. “I’ll have to try to get back to Sunset.”
“No, don’t leave me.” Hattie clutched at him even more desperately than before. “You have to stay here. You can’t leave me. I don’t want to die alone.” Her words came out in short gasps, interspersed with heart-wrenching shrieks and sobs.
“Listen to me,” he ordered, cradling her face in his hands. “I don’t want to leave you like this, but I don’t have any choice.”
“I need you.” Her eyes were red and swollen. Sweat and tears bathed her face. Her body convulsed as another ferocious pain gripped her. Hattie whimpered, obviously fighting to stay calm. She quickly lost the battle. An unearthly howl of pure pain shot from her lips. “I swear, Willie Morse, if you leave me now, I’ll kill you. I’ll track you down. I’ll find you, and I’ll kill you dead.”
But Hattie would be the one dead. Unless Willie got help, both Hattie and their child would perish.
Dear Lord, help me! Help us!
He must remain calm. Somehow he had to extricate himself from Hattie’s iron grip, climb down from the wagon, and walk away. No, run away.
Not running away. Running for help.
His thoughts went wild, scattering through his brain like buckshot.
He couldn’t run. He could barely walk. How in the name of all that was holy could he make it to Sunset in time to save Hattie and their child?
She still clung to him, wailing in anguish. He could not even begin to imagine the torture wracking her body.
“I have to go,” he told her again, his voice no longer wavering but purposeful and determined. When she reached for him, he pulled away. “God knows, I don’t want to leave you here alone, but if I don’t try to find help, I’ll regret it for the rest of my life. As much as it hurts me to leave, losing you would hurt even more. I can’t lose you, Hattie. I love you. I wish you knew how much.”
He covered her shaking body with quilts, kissed her cheek, and once more whispered his love for her. With an ache in his heart, he swung himself down from the wagon. Struggling with the wet traces, he worked as quickly as he could to unhitch the horse. If he had to walk to Sunset, he’d never make it. Riding the cart horse would be slow and difficult, but the heavy draft animal offered his only hope of reaching town and finding aid.
Stretching his legs over the horse’s broad back brought tremendous pain, but as Hattie’s frantic yelps rose in the air, he forgot how much he was hurting. He leaned forward and held tight to his mount’s neck. Together, man and beast trudged over the rain-soaked grasses, carefully making their way past the fallen tree. Once around the obstacle and on the road again, he pressed against the animal’s flanks, urging it to move faster. The horse’s huge hoofs slipped and slid. Willie threaded his fingers in the beast’s shaggy mane. Onward they traveled.
When they reached a slight incline, he groaned as the horse struggled to gain ground. Frightened by the storm’s incessant fury, and unaccustomed to a rider on its back, the animal reared. Its huge forelegs st
ruck at the air. With a fearful whinny and a violent jerk of its head, the horse threw Willie into the muck and mire and then disappeared into the thick pine forest.
Wiping the mud from his eyes, Willie fought his way to his feet. Searching for the horse would do no good. He would only lose precious time…time he didn’t have.
He took a breath, got his bearings, and plodded onward. Limping, falling, crawling, scrabbling over the earth…he would do whatever it took to keep moving forward.
Gradually, the thunder lessened and the rain eased up as the storm’s fury rolled past. The lighter skies made it easier for Willie to find his way, yet the mud and mire slowed his progress. His boots must have weighed ten pounds apiece. His lungs burned and his muscles were on fire. Yet the memory of Hattie’s cries spurred him onward.
He fell again. And again.
Each time he fell, he picked himself up.
A fitting metaphor for life itself, and for all Hattie had inspired him to do.
But each time he went down, it got harder to get back on his feet.
Now he needed more than his own determination, more even than Hattie’s encouragement. Once again, he turned to prayer, asking not for himself, but for Hattie and for their unborn child.
“Let them live,” he begged. If it came to it, he would gladly die in their place. Maybe that was what the Lord wanted from him. His death in return for their lives, a fitting sacrifice for the multitude of sins he’d committed.
A year ago, he’d wanted to die, had actually tried to end his life on a dusty summer’s day, but the Lord had refused to take him. Now, though he yearned to live, he would give up his life in an instant if he knew it would save Hattie and their child.
He rose once more to stagger forward with faltering steps. He would go on as long as he had breath.
With that thought, he crashed to the ground again. Willie closed his eyes. He would rest but a moment, get his wind back, and he would continue on.
When someone shook him, he had no idea how much time had passed. Probably no more than a few minutes, he guessed. He’d lost consciousness, he realized. Blinking, he looked around and tried to get his bearings.
To his surprise, Dr. Abner Kellerman stared back.
Willie glanced around again, reassuring himself that he was still sprawled out across a muddy roadway, not lying in a neatly-made hospital bed. “What are you doing here?” he asked. “How did you find me?” Giving his head a shake, he pulled himself up. “Never mind. It’s not important. Hattie needs help. You’ve got to save her, Doc.” He clutched at the lapels of the man’s jacket.
“Hattie? Where is she? What’s happened?”
The voice was that of the doctor’s wife calling out from a nearby carriage. Without taking time to reply, Willie rushed toward it, dragging his aching leg the best he could.
“Back there, maybe a mile or two. A tree’s down. The road’s blocked.” He choked on his tears. “The baby’s coming, but something’s not right.”
“Tell me what you can.” Dr. Kellerman assisted Willie into the buggy.
“I tried to calm her, tried to tell her everything would be all right.” Never mind the tears. He didn’t care who saw them. “She said the baby’s turned around wrong. She could feel the head. Here.” Willie pointed to his rib cage. “That’s not possible, is it?”
“It happens.”
Willie saw the stricken look on the doctor’s face. He saw, too, how Charlotte’s hand closed around her husband’s fingers. “You can help her, can’t you?”
“If she were back in Sunset…” He blew out a breath. “Never mind. She’s not in Sunset, and I’ll have to deal with the situation the best I can.” Abner gave Willie a hard look. “Be prepared for the worst.”
Charlotte did her best to distract him. She talked to him in a soft, soothing voice, trying to help him calm his nerves and get his mind off the grim reality that might lie ahead. Her voice droned on as her husband hurried the smart, matched pair of bays over the rough, muddy road.
“Over there,” Willie called, pointing to a bend in the road. “It’s not much farther.” His heart raced as the horses’ hoofs splattered through puddles left from the violent storm. Second later, the fallen tree came into view.
“Stay back,” Abner ordered, reaching for his medical bag. “Charlotte and I will do what we can.”
“I’m coming with you.”
Charlotte shook her head. “It’s better you do what the doctor says. Wait here, Willie.”
As he slowly plodded along behind them, they hurried toward the fallen giant. They both scrambled around it and quickly disappeared on the other side.
Willie stopped, cocked his head, and then fell to the ground in joy as he heard Hattie’s feeble voice. Obviously, she no longer had strength enough to cry out. But at least she was alive.
Now, nothing could hold him back. He squared his shoulders and, ignoring the fierce stabs of pain in his leg, he marched resolutely forward.
“I told you to stay back.” Dr. Kellerman shot him a sharp look when Willie jostled his way past the tree trunk and came toward the wagon. “Childbirth isn’t something a man needs to see.”
“You’re a man.”
“I’m a doctor, but even so, if given a choice, most women would rather have a midwife attend them.” His hands were all over Hattie’s protruding belly as he spoke.
Willie had no idea what was going on, but Dr. Kellerman seemed fairly calm. Charlotte sat in the wagon bed, cradling Hattie’s head in her lap and crooning softly.
The woman looked up and rolled her eyes. “Well, now that you’re here, make yourself useful. Fill that bucket with water, there’s plenty of it to be had.” Puddles surrounded the wagon. “Next, get a fire going as quickly as you can. Get the water boiling.”
“There’s carbolic in my bag,” Dr. Kellerman called out. “We’ll use it to make the birth as safe as possible.”
Willie couldn’t put all of his questions into words. Too many things were going on at once. He grabbed the bucket at the back of the wagon and set about following the instructions both Abner and Charlotte gave. He added a few drops of carbolic acid solution to the water. He found a few of Hattie’s blouses, ripped them up and soaked them for use as compresses. He kept his mouth shut and did as he was told. It worried him each time he looked up and saw Dr. Kellerman’s hands pressing against Hattie’s stomach. That wasn’t how babies were born, at least, that’s not how they were supposed to be born. Nobody was supposed to push them out of the womb.
Maybe the baby couldn’t come out. Maybe the baby had—
A plaintive newborn mewl rose up. All thought ceased in Willie’s head as he fainted dead away.
* * * *
Hattie cradled the infant to her breast, holding him close as she huddled beneath the gray woolen blanket. Charlotte tried to take the child from her, insisting that new mothers needed rest, but Hattie was having none of it. She’d endured more pain than she’d ever known possible, had nearly died from the complications of what Dr. Kellerman called a breech birth, and nobody was taking her baby away from her.
But where was Willie? Why hadn’t he come to see his son?
Charlotte laughed. “Better tend to him, Abner. I’ll take care of Hattie.” She jerked a thumb to her right, then smiled. “He passed out. Too much for a fellow to handle, you know. Now, let’s get back to business. You might think the hard work is over, but it’s not.”
“What do you mean? The baby’s here.”
“Afterbirth,” she whispered. “Relax, Hattie, and it will all be over soon enough.” She pressed on Hattie’s softened abdomen. “You might feel a few tiny contractions.”
Hattie closed her eyes. After the ordeal she’d been through, a few tiny contractions would be of minor concern. Soon, Charlotte’s voice came toward her.
“All finished. Now, let’s get you cleaned up.”
“Is Willie all right?”
“He’s fine. You’ll be able to see him in a few minutes.�
�
The warm water felt good against Hattie’s thighs. Her son tucked securely beneath one arm, she closed her eyes again and soon drifted off to sleep.
* * * *
“He’s perfect,” Willie told her when she awakened to find him standing near the wagon, stroking the baby’s cheek. “Ten fingers, ten little toes.”
Hattie giggled. “Have you ever seen such a cute little nose?”
The proud father nodded. “Indeed I have. He seems to have gotten it from you.”
Wistfulness fluttered through her heart, then slipped away. She would always wonder about her own mother and father, which one she favored, why they hadn’t wanted her. But those were questions for another day. This was a time for joy, a time to celebrate life.
“How did Dr. Kellerman get here? Did you walk all the way to Sunset?”
“I didn’t have to go quite so far. By some miracle, the doctor and his wife were driving to Denver. I believe he meant to attend some medical meeting tomorrow.”
“And now, I’ve spoiled it for him.”
“He couldn’t have made it anyway with the road blocked.” He leaned close. “Tell me what he did. I saw him…with his hands on you.”
“The baby was wrong-side up, Willie, just as I suspected. Dr. Kellerman manipulated him, turned him around the right direction so he could finally come out and join us.”
“Have you decided what you’ll call him?”
She tilted her head and peered up at Willie. “I thought that would be something we should both agree on. A name is important, you know.” She lowered her gaze. “Actually, I was hoping we could call him William, after you.” She held her breath.
An odd expression flickered over Willie’s face. “I don’t know. Give me time to think about it.”
“Your father gave you his name,” she reminded him. “I’d hoped you might want to pass it on to your own son.”
“My son. Our son.” He grinned. “Yes, I think I like it.” He touched the infant’s tiny nose. “Welcome to the world, William Howard Morse. The third.”
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