by Pat White
“Who are you?” he said walking toward her.
“Who are you?” she countered, her hand still possessively on Sean’s shoulder.
“Bill Cousins, chief administrator of this facility.”
“I’m Mary MacNeil, former patient.”
Cousins’s eyes widened. She tamped down her panic. She could do this.
“Why do you have handcuffs on my husband? He came for my medical records. I don’t understand why he’s being detained.”
“With all due respect, Mrs. MacNeil, he broke into my computer for your medical records and you’ve not been formally released. You attacked one of our doctors yesterday.”
“If my husband broke into your computer, it’s because he doesn’t trust you to do your job. Why should he? I’ve been accosted numerous times by Dr. Zinkerman. I was only trying to defend myself last night.”
Annie’s cheeks reddened at her lie about Zinker man’s abuse, but she needed to lie to push Cousins further into a corner.
“You’re delusional,” Cousins said.
“I’ve never been more sane in my life. Please release my husband.”
“I should clear this with Dr. Zinkerman.”
“Who’s in charge, you or Zinkerman?”
“Well, I am, but—”
“Where’s the phone?”
“What?”
“The telephone. I need to call my attorney.”
Cousins hesitated.
“Then again maybe I’ll go to the police, then the press. Wouldn’t Newsweek be interested in the abuses at your facility?” She crossed her arms in a position of power.
“Uncuff him,” Cousins ordered the guard.
Five minutes later Sean was officially signing Annie out of Appleton. Nurse Lydia gave Annie a hug. “I’m putting some medication in your pocket,” she whispered into her ear. “Here’s something else. A blank journal for you to write your thoughts.”
Lydia took a step back and smiled. Something ached inside Annie’s chest. A connection with another person, a person she could trust. It reminded her of a connection with someone else, someone who cared about her, not her brains or her research.
It had been a stressful hour, gathering all her mental and physical strength to get back into Appleton, then bluffing Cousins into letting them go without waiting for permission from Zinkerman. Thank God the bad doctor hadn’t returned.
The gates opened and Annie and Sean strolled away from the Appleton property, hand in hand. Once out of sight of the hospital guard, he slipped his hand from hers and picked up the pace.
He didn’t seem happy to see her, or relieved, or even grateful. Fine. She eyed the medical file in his hand. That’s all she needed anyway.
Still, his attitude irked her.
“Your welcome,” she said.
He stared straight ahead, completely ignoring her.
“Great weather we’re having,” she said, glancing up at the clear blue sky.
Nothing.
“I could really go for a Hawaiian-style pizza.”
He stopped short and stared at her. “What the hell is the matter with you? How could you walk in there like that? What if Zinkerman got his hands on you?”
“A simple thank-you would be nice.”
“For what? Risking danger for your own selfish needs? This is about more than some juvenile crush you have on a man you hardly know.”
A juvenile crush? Her blood pressure spiked as she watched him storm toward the car. She wanted to set him straight, to tell him the rescue had nothing to do with him and everything to do with tracking down the whereabouts of her mom. She wanted her freedom, to find the people who loved her. That’s why she’d gone after him. But he hadn’t given her a chance to clarify her position. He got into the car and slammed the door, slapping her medical file between the seats.
She pulled open the door and got in, ready for a fight.
“Zinkerman was on his way. Did you know that?” he said.
“Then it’s a good thing I came when I did.”
“Now everyone knows where you are. You might as well have shot up a flare. At least if I’d gotten in and out, they wouldn’t have discovered our whereabouts.”
“But you couldn’t get out, remember?” She countered.
“I was working on it.”
“Handcuffed to a chair?”
“Damn it, if Zinkerman had—”
“He didn’t.”
“They could have—”
“They didn’t.”
“I can’t protect you if you keep doing stuff like that,” he said, slamming his fists against the steering wheel.
“I’m a big girl. I can take care of myself.”
Sean grabbed her by the shoulders preparing to let her have it, but the lecture wouldn’t come. As he stared into her eyes, he knew what blasted his control to smithereens: she could have been hurt.
“I’m glad…you’re okay,” is all he could get out, then pulled her to his chest. She came willingly and a ball formed in his throat. How could something so impossible feel so right? They would have sat there for hours had his common sense not kicked in. They had to get out of here and quick.
“We’ve gotta go,” he said against her silken hair.
She pushed away from him and smiled. “Thanks.”
“For what?”
“For caring.”
Clearing his throat, he started the car.
“Lydia gave me some medication,” she said, glancing out the window.
He pulled onto the farm road leading away from Appleton. “Good. I’ll send it to the lab for analysis. Maybe they can intensify the dosage to help you remember more. Where did you get the sweater?”
“I stole it off a patient.”
His head snapped around.
“Kidding,” she said, her hand up in a defensive gesture.
He headed north, toward relative safety. Annie grabbed the file and leafed through it.
“You sure you’re up to that?” he said.
“It’s my medical file.”
A file he’d practically memorized: head trauma, broken hip and arm, internal bleeding. It was a miracle she’d survived. She flipped over another page and turned white.
He glanced at the marriage certificate. Damn.
“What’s this?” she said.
“I had to prove you were my wife in order to admit you to Appleton.”
“This is a marriage license, a real one? We’re…married?”
Chapter Eight
Sean focused on the road, steeling himself against her horrified expression.
“But you said you weren’t my husband.” She stuffed papers back into the folder.
“We never exchanged vows.”
“What did we do?”
“Nothing.”
“You married me against my will?”
“You were unconscious and in danger. We had to protect you.”
“I don’t understand. What about Raymond? Wasn’t he my guardian?”
“He thought you were dead.”
He needed to keep her calm and relaxed, not upset her further with the betrayal of her father figure.
“We can’t get into this right now,” he said. “Not with Zinkerman on our trail. Which reminds me, what did he do to you back at Appleton?”
“Nothing, I made it up. Don’t change the sub ject.” She squared off at him. “You and I were legally married while I was in a coma?”
“Yes.”
“You thought I was going to die, didn’t you?”
“No.”
“What if I’d remained in a coma indefinitely?”
He couldn’t answer. The thought of never hearing the sound of her laughter had eaten away at his insides for the past year.
“What if you fell in love and wanted to marry someone else?” she said.
“That would never happen.”
“Because you were committed to your job and a pretend marriage?”
He stared her down. “Becau
se I don’t do love. Never have. Never will.”
“People don’t ‘do’ love. It happens all by itself.”
“It doesn’t happen to me.”
His words fell heavy between them. They had to be said. Sean had started in this world without love, and he’d go out the same way. Hell, he knew he’d been a mistake, a plan of his mother’s to keep Eddy in line. She’d admitted it to him once, confessed her hopes that having a child would change her husband.
They drove in silence, Annie scribbling in her journal.
“Did you remember something?” he said.
“Nothing important.” She didn’t look at him.
“Everything is important. Your mind is what will free you in the end.”
“Then I’m in big trouble.”
“Annie—”
“Don’t, okay? Don’t be nice to me. Don’t talk to me like you care. Stop with the lies. For once I’d like to feel clean, like I wasn’t covered in a film of deceit. I get it now. I understand your role in all this. The less we talk, the better.”
He wanted to argue with her, convince her that he did care about her and they could be friends. Friends? Who was he kidding? He had to keep this professional. He simply couldn’t risk getting pulled in again.
He grabbed his cell phone and punched his supervisor’s number, then glanced at Annie. “Can I see the medication?”
She dug out the bottle from her sweater pocket and handed it to him. Their fingers touched. A surge of electricity shot across his nerve endings. Her eyes flared. She felt it, too.
“Connors,” his supervisor said.
“It’s MacNeil. Tell Jackson to stop his probe of the Appleton computer.”
“Why’s that?”
“We went back and got her medical files, and the medication.”
“We?”
“I went back. She followed.”
“Judas priest, man! She’s a federal witness. You shouldn’t be—”
“We also got her medication.” He spelled out the prescription.
“Bring her in. That’s an order.”
“Can’t.”
“Why not?” Connors pushed.
“I think they’ve got someone on the inside. They found us too easily last night.”
“You’re being paranoid. You’ve got your orders. Bring her in.”
“I need to be sure.”
“You’ve always been a loyal agent, MacNeil. Don’t start thinking now. We’ll expect you by night fall tomorrow.”
“Yes, sir.”
He clicked the phone off and slapped it against the dash.
“Bad news?” she asked.
“No. Yes. I don’t know.” He took a deep breath and glanced at her. “You need to remember.”
She looked away.
“I know a hypnotherapist we could try,” he said.
“No mind control stuff.”
“It’s hypnosis. It will help you remember. You want to remember, don’t you?”
“I’m not sure,” she said through clenched teeth.
“Your power lies in your memory. They can’t hurt you if you remember and go public with what you know. You’ll be safe. You can get your life back.”
“My life.” She touched her hand to her forehead. “I’ve had flashes of what I think is my life. Flashes of frustration and loneliness. Then I see your face.”
She glanced at him, and the emotion in her eyes made him snap his gaze back to the road.
“If I remember, I’ll remember it all, right?” she said.
“That’s the idea.”
“How painful is this going to be?”
He clenched his jaw.
“Thought so.” She hesitated. “What happens after I remember?”
“You’ll get your life back.”
“From what I can tell, I was shipped out to live with a stranger because I’m smart. I spent most of my days alone in a laboratory because I’m smart. I’m on the run for my life because I’m smart. If I remember it all, I’m right back to my pathetic existence.”
“Don’t you dare feel sorry for yourself. You have more than…”
“Than what?”
“Forget it.”
“No, I want to hear this. A lecture from the king of honor and integrity. From the man who prostituted himself to manipulate me. A man who married an unconscious woman against her will. Let’s hear it. Come on.”
“This isn’t the time.”
“Sure it is,” she challenged.
“Drop it, Annie.”
“Hey, you were the one who said honesty is the best policy. You want me to tell you everything. That goes both ways. What do I have? Huh? Come on.”
He snapped. “You had it easy, okay? You had everything you wanted whenever you wanted it. Raymond made sure of that.”
“Yeah, well, that’s not how I remember it.”
“You said you don’t remember.”
“I remember feelings.” She waved her hand. “Forget it, you wouldn’t understand.”
But he did. That was the problem. Only he never realized that the secluded lifestyle bothered her. She’d seemed content in her lab doing research, having Raymond’s servants and butlers wait on her from sunrise until dusk. She’d never told him of her loneliness.
But then he didn’t listen very closely to her words for fear the naive scientist would get under his skin. So he half listened to her hopes and dreams. Trying to compartmentalize the place in his heart that was being slowly warmed by her constant wonder. It was all a lie anyway. Nothing he did or said held any truth.
Or did it?
She had professed her love for him. But he never had said the words back. He remembered the first time she shared her secret, her voice pitched higher than usual, dancing with excitement. He’d taken her to a carnival and afterward they went exploring in a forest nearby. The stars glittered in the dark sky, and the wind was crisp with the smell of the mountains.
Suddenly it hit him. He knew from limited psych training that smells can bring back memories. It was worth a shot. A five-minute stop in the forest was a risk worth taking to bring back her memory.
She’d called it an enchanted forest. That was an understatement. He’d never forget the evening spent in each other’s arms.
He glanced at her. She stared out the passenger window, angry as hell that she was legally tied to him.
To think that a year ago she said she’d have given anything to marry him. She didn’t really know him. He only let her see the smooth and caring facade that was nothing like the real man. Nothing like the violent animal chomping at the bit to get out and ravage the world around him.
Including Annie. He could never hurt her. Not physically, anyway. But emotionally? He couldn’t risk it—didn’t trust himself.
“I’ve got an idea to help you remember,” he said, needing her to remember, needing her to hate him.
“No hypnosis,” she said, crossing her arms over her chest.
“I want to take you to a special place.”
“Back to Raymond?”
He gripped the steering wheel at the sound of hope in her voice.
“No, to a spot I think might jog your memory.”
“Are you sure Raymond can’t help? I get this feeling he always took care of me.”
He opened and closed his fingers around the steering wheel. Oh, the old man took care of her all right. Right to her grave.
“We can’t involve anyone else, Annie.”
“So, you won’t let me call Mom? Just to hear her voice?”
“I’m sure her line’s tapped and they’re probably watching the farm.”
“She’s in danger?” she said, panicked.
“They have no reason to hurt her. They’re watching her to catch you.”
He hoped he was right. He couldn’t bear the thought of anything happening to Annie’s mom. He’d met her once. His heart ached for a connection with someone nurturing and generous.
Hell. He had to get his emotional arm
or back in place before he completely lost his edge against their pursuers.
“Are we going back to the motel?” she asked.
“Too dangerous.”
A forlorn expression creased her features. Familiarity of any kind must seem like nirvana. They’d become familiar in sleep last night even if she didn’t remember. Her rounded curves fit so perfectly against him, her warmth seeping through his shirt and into his chest.
He admitted to himself that last night was the first time he’d slept in months, which wasn’t a good thing. Drawing comfort from Annie made Sean weak and unsuspecting.
He couldn’t afford to be either.
SHE MUST HAVE fallen asleep. When Annie opened her eyes, the sun burned low against the horizon. She glanced out the window at a corner grocery as they passed through another small farm town.
Adjusting herself into a better position, she tried making sense of it all: Sean was her husband and up until yesterday she’d been a patient at a mental hospital. Which meant he had complete control. Control that Annie wanted back.
It was time to break free of Sean and his lies, of the constant fear, of the haunting feeling that in the end she’d have no one. A part of her feared she was meant to be alone. At least that’s what she’d been told over and over again.
People don’t understand you.
No one appreciates your brilliant mind.
You’re not like a normal girl.
She’d give anything to be a normal young woman. Then she wouldn’t be running from bad men who wanted to probe her mind and kill Sean.
She studied his stubbled chin and firm set of his jaw. Determination emanated from his body. He was determined to make her remember and yet she got the feeling he dreaded it. What compelled him to be her sole protector when he could turn her over to the FBI and rid himself of the personal danger that nipped at their heels?
“Why are you doing this?” she asked.
“I think it will help you remember.”
“I mean why did you marry me to keep me safe? Why did you risk your life by breaking into Appleton? Why protect me by yourself when you could take me in?”
“Which question do you want me to answer first?”
Was that humor in his voice?
“Take your pick,” she said.
“We forged the marriage certificate so I could prove I was your husband and admit you to Appleton. The Bureau thought if the men wanting your formula found out you were alive, they’d track you down. We’re doing this all to protect you, Annie.”