by Irene Hannon
“I haven’t danced in six or seven years.”
“So should we just pass? I mean, I’d like to help out, but…” She lifted her shoulders helplessly.
Eric looked at her thoughtfully. It would be easy to agree. And probably wise. But as he gazed at Kate, bathed in golden light from the centerpiece candle, the creamy skin of her neck and collarbone glowing warmly, the delicate curve of her neck illuminated by the flickering flame, he was suddenly overcome by a compelling need to hold her in his arms and sway to romantic music. It would be a memory of their brief time together that he could dust off when the nights got long and he was in a melancholy mood, or on those rare occasions when he let himself indulge in fantasy and wonder how differently his life might have turned out if he’d met someone like Kate a dozen years ago.
“I’m willing to give it a try if you are.”
Her eyes grew wide. “Are you serious?”
“Absolutely.”
“But I’m really not very good, Eric. I’ll probably step all over your feet.”
“I’m more worried about stepping on yours. Come on, we’ll muddle through.” He stood and held out his hand.
Kate hesitated. It was true that her dancing skills were extremely rusty. And it was also true that she was worried about looking awkward and embarrassing Eric. But she was even more worried about the close proximity that dancing entailed. It was one thing to sit next to this virile man in the car or at the table, and quite another to be held in his arms. She wasn’t exactly sure how she would handle the closeness. But there seemed to be no way to gracefully decline. So she took a deep breath and placed her hand in his.
“You may be sorry,” she warned, her voice not quite steady.
“I don’t think so.”
As he led her out to the dance floor, the orchestra began playing “Unforgettable.” He glanced down at her and grinned. “You know, if we’re both as bad as we claim, that’s exactly what this dance might be.”
Her insides were quaking, but she managed to smile. “You could be right.”
As it turned out, the dance really was unforgettable. In every way.
From the moment he drew her into his arms, she felt as if she’d come home. They danced together perfectly, moving effortlessly to the beat of the music. And once she realized she didn’t have to worry about her feet, she was able to focus on other things—the spicy scent of his after-shave, the way he tenderly folded her right hand in his left, tucking it protectively against his solid chest, and the strong, sure feel of his other hand splayed across her back, guiding her firmly but gently.
Kate closed her eyes and let his touch and the romantic music work their magic. It had been a long time, such a very long time, since she’d been held this way; since she’d felt so safe and protected and—the word cherished came to mind. Which was strange. After all, she barely knew Eric. But something about the way he held her made her feel all of those things. Of course, it might just be her imagination. But, real or not, she intended to enjoy the moment, because it might never come again. With a contented sigh, she relaxed against him.
Eric felt Kate’s sudden relaxation, and instinctively he drew her closer, tilting his head slightly so that her lustrous hair brushed his cheek. Then he closed his eyes and inhaled, savoring the faint, pleasing floral fragrance that emanated from her skin. She felt good in his arms, he reflected; soft and feminine and very, very appealing. He swallowed with difficulty. Dear Lord, why did you send someone like this my way? he cried silently, overcome by a sudden sense of anguish and regret. I made a vow in Your sight on my wedding day that I don’t want to break. But I’m lonely, Lord. And Kate is getting harder and harder to resist. Her sweetness and values and kind heart are like a ray of sun in my life. I’m drawn to her, Lord. Powerfully. Please help me find the strength to do what is right.
By the time the music ended, Kate was fairly quivering. And Eric didn’t look much steadier, she reflected, as—with obvious reluctance—he released her. The hand that rested at the small of her back as he guided her toward their table felt about as unsteady as her legs.
“Eric! I knew you were here somewhere but I just couldn’t seem to find you in this crowd.”
They turned in unison as a man in his mid-fifties with salt-and-pepper hair approached them.
“Hello, Reverend Jacobs.” Eric’s voice sounded husky, she noted. But at least it was working. She wasn’t sure about her own. “It’s quite a turnout, isn’t it?”
“It gets bigger every year, which is very gratifying.”
“Reverend, I’d like you to meet Kate Nolan. Kate, Reverend Carl Jacobs, my minister.”
“Nice to meet you, Mrs. Nolan.” The man extended his hand, and Kate found her fingers engulfed in a firm, somehow reassuring clasp. She stared at the minister, struck by the kindness and serenity in his eyes. He radiated calm, like someone who was at peace with life, who understood the vagaries of this world and had not only accepted them, but had found a way to move beyond them. He seemed, somehow, like a man with answers. The kind of answers Kate had been searching for.
Their gazes held for a long moment, until at last Kate found her voice. “It’s nice to meet you, too. Eric has spoken very highly of you.”
“And also of you. I’ve met your daughter. She’s charming.”
“Thank you.”
Suddenly Eric reached inside his jacket and retrieved his pager. He scanned the message, then frowned. “Would you two excuse me while I make a quick phone call?”
“Of course,” Kate replied.
“I’ll keep Mrs. Nolan company,” the reverend promised.
They watched as Eric threaded his way through the crowd, then disappeared.
“He works too hard,” Reverend Jacobs remarked. “But it’s difficult to fault such dedication. And he’s a fine doctor.”
“I agree.”
“Eric has mentioned you, Mrs. Nolan. Have you known each other long?”
“Please call me Kate. Actually, Eric and I have a somewhat unusual history. We met—if you could call it that—five years ago, when my husband was seriously injured in a car accident. Eric saved his life.”
The minister’s eyebrows rose. “Is that right? Eric never mentioned it. But then, I’m not surprised. To use an old cliché, he isn’t one to blow his own horn. But I understood from Eric that you were a widow.”
“Yes. My husband lived for several months after the accident, but he never regained consciousness.”
“I’m so sorry, Kate. It must have been a very difficult time for you. Sarah would have been just a baby, I’m sure.”
She swallowed and nodded. “She was six weeks old. She needed me, and so I managed to get through the days. But it was almost like my own life ended in some ways when Jack died,” she said quietly.
“I know what you mean. I lost my wife of thirty years to cancer just five months ago. She left a void that can never be filled.”
Kate’s face softened in sympathy. “I’m so sorry, Reverend.”
“Thank you. It’s been a difficult time. But the Lord has sustained me.”
A flash of pain and bitterness swept through her. “I wish I could say the same. I always felt He’d deserted me.”
“Many people feel that way in the face of tragedy,” Reverend Jacobs returned in an understanding tone that held no censure. “But often the opposite actually happens. We think the Lord hasn’t answered our prayers, so we turn away. But you know, He always does answer us. It’s just that sometimes it’s not the answer we want to hear.”
Kate frowned. “I’ve never thought of it quite that way before. But why would He take someone like Jack, who was so young and had so much to offer? Why would He not only take my husband, but deprive Sarah of a father? What sense does that make?”
“The Lord’s ways are often difficult to understand, Kate. And I certainly don’t have all the answers,” the minister said gently. “But maybe together we could find a few. I’d certainly be happy to talk things throug
h with you. Why don’t you stop by some day?”
Kate thought about Eric’s comment at the barbecue—that Reverend Jacobs had helped him through some difficult times. Might he be able to do the same for her? Help her find the sense of peace that he so obviously had, even in the face of a recent, tragic loss? It seemed like an option that might bear exploring.
“I just might do that, Reverend.”
“Please do.” He extracted a card from his pocket and handed it to her, then glanced over her shoulder. “Well, here comes your host.” He waved at Eric, who was weaving through the crowd, then turned to Kate and extended his hand. “I have several more people to see before I leave tonight. It was a pleasure to meet you. And do think about stopping by.”
“I will.”
Eric rejoined her a moment later, and the concern on his face made her breath catch in her throat. “What’s wrong? Is Sarah…”
“Sarah’s fine,” he reassured her quickly, noting her sudden pallor. “That was my exchange. I’m on call tonight. One of my patients has been in an accident, and her parents are on their way to the hospital with her now. I promised to meet them. Normally I’d just let the emergency room handle it, but she’s got asthma as well and I thought a familiar face might help calm her down. She’s only eight.”
“Of course.” She reached for her purse and tucked the minister’s card inside.
“Kate, I’m sorry about this,” Eric said regretfully. “I wanted us to have a nice evening.”
“But we have! The dinner was lovely, and we even got to dance. That’s more than I’ve done in a long time. Please don’t worry about it.”
He gazed down into Kate’s sincere eyes and felt a lump form in his throat. He remembered Cindy’s attitude on occasions when they’d had to cut a social evening short—resentful, put-upon, angry. It had put a strain on their relationship for days. Of course, Cindy had been through it many times. This was a first for Kate. Maybe, in time, she’d grow to feel the same way. But somehow he didn’t think so. Not that the theory would ever be put to the test, he reminded himself firmly.
“Thanks for understanding,” he said quietly.
She shrugged off his gratitude. “Don’t be silly. If I was a parent with an injured child, I’d want my doctor there. It’s the right thing to do.”
“Nevertheless, I appreciate it. I’d take you home first, but the hospital is so close. How about if I call you a cab?”
“Why don’t I just go with you?”
That was an offer he’d never heard before. “To the hospital?” he asked in surprise.
“Would that be okay?”
“Sure. I’d appreciate the company,” he said honestly. “But it could be a while,” he warned.
“If you’re delayed I can just get a cab from there. I don’t mind waiting, Eric.” Which was true. She really didn’t want their evening to end just yet.
“Okay, if you’re sure.”
As they turned to go, she expected him to place his hand at the small of her back and guide her toward the door, as had become his custom. But instead, he surprised her by taking her hand in his, linking their fingers and squeezing gently. The smile he gave her was warm and somehow intimate.
“Thanks for being a good sport.”
As he led her out of the ballroom, Kate savored the feel of his strong fingers entwined with hers. And she wondered about Cindy’s customary reaction to an interruption such as this. Not good, apparently, considering how grateful—and taken aback—Eric had been by her acceptance of it. She was beginning to form a picture of his married life. And it wasn’t pretty.
A movement on the other side of the waiting room caught her eye, and Kate looked up from her magazine. The young couple whose daughter had been injured had risen anxiously, privy to something in the corridor hidden from Kate’s view. A moment later Eric entered and walked toward them. Though they spoke in low tones, their voices carried clearly.
“How is she, Doctor?” The man’s face was lined with anxiety, and Kate could tell even from across the room that his wife had a death grip on his hand. Her heart contracted in sympathy, and she blinked back sudden tears. She knew what it was like to wait in a cold, sterile anteroom for news about someone you loved.
“She’ll be fine, Mr. Thomas. Let’s sit down for a minute. Mrs. Thomas?” Eric nodded toward a cluster of chairs and gently guided the mother toward one, clearly attuned to the woman’s emotional distress. Kate was impressed by his astuteness—and his thoughtfulness. In a medical world that was often clinical and impersonal, Eric appeared to be an admirable exception. Which somehow didn’t surprise her.
When they were seated, he spoke again, his tone calm and reassuring. “Emily has lots of scrapes and bruises, but nothing requiring stitches. Her arm is broken—in two places, actually—but they’re clean breaks and should heal just fine. Dr. West is a fine orthopedic surgeon and he took care of everything. She was having a little trouble with her breathing when I first arrived, but we got that under control very quickly. Once I started talking to her about your vacation to Walt Disney World, she calmed down and the asthma wasn’t a problem. We’d like to keep her overnight just to make sure she’s not in too much pain and monitor her breathing. There should be no problem with her going home in the morning.”
The relief on the young couple’s faces was visible from across the room, Kate noted discreetly.
“I can’t thank you enough for coming in tonight, Doctor,” the woman said gratefully, her voice thick with tears. “We told her all the way here in the car that you were coming, and that helped to keep her calm. We were so afraid she’d have an attack!”
“No thanks are necessary, Mrs. Thomas. I’m just doing my job.”
“You do a lot more than that,” the girl’s father corrected him. “Most doctors just send you to the emergency room. They don’t show up themselves. This means a lot to us. Especially when it’s obvious we interrupted a special event.” He nodded toward Eric’s tux.
“I was glad to do it. I’ll stop by in the morning and check on Emily, and by lunchtime she’ll be ready to go home. Just tell her not to play soccer quite so aggressively in the future,” he said with a grin.
“Do you think maybe we should take her off the team?” the man asked anxiously.
“Not at all. We’ve got her asthma under control. And kids need to run and play and stretch their wings. Reasonable caution is prudent. Excessive caution is stifling. Sometimes accidents happen, but that’s part of living.” Eric rose. “They’re getting ready to move her to a room, so let me take you down to her and you can walk with her.”
Eric glanced at Kate and smiled as he ushered the couple out, mouthing, “I’ll be right back.” She nodded.
When he reappeared a few minutes later, she was waiting at the doorway. He smiled at her ruefully. “You look ready to leave.”
“Let’s just say hospitals aren’t my favorite places,” she replied lightly, but he heard the pain in her voice. His gut clenched at the echo of sadness in her eyes and he frowned.
“I’m sorry, Kate. I didn’t even think about that. I shouldn’t have let you come. Instead of leaving you with pleasant memories of tonight, I’ve dredged up unhappy ones.”
“I wanted to come,” she insisted. “And I’m glad I did. It wasn’t as hard as I thought it might be.”
He took her arm and guided her purposefully toward the door. “But there’s no reason to hang around now. It’s my second trip today, anyway.” He glanced at his watch and his frown deepened. “It’s probably too late to go back to the dance. Would you like to stop and get a cup of coffee on the way home?”
She looked up at him. He’d mentioned he was on call this weekend. And that he’d already made one trip to the hospital today. There were fine lines at the corners of his eyes, and slight shadows beneath them. Much as she’d like to extend the evening, she shook her head. “It’s been a long week, Eric. And there’s no reason to keep your mother up any later than necessary. Let’s head ba
ck.”
He studied her for a moment. “Are you sure?”
“Of course. But I had a good time tonight, despite the interruption.”
He chuckled. “I guess we should look on the bright side,” he said as they reached his car and he opened the door for her.
She glanced at him curiously. “What do you mean?”
“Well, we may have ended up at a hospital, but at least it wasn’t because of any broken toes.”
She smiled. He had a good sense of humor. And he wasn’t afraid to laugh at himself. She liked that. “Good point. Actually, I think we did quite well for two very out-of-practice dancers.”
Eric almost suggested that they polish up their skills another night, but he caught himself in time. There wouldn’t be another time, he reminded himself soberly. It was too dangerous, because Kate was easy to be with, and he knew with absolute certainty that she could very easily become a part of his life—an important part. But given his situation, all he could offer her was friendship.
And his feelings were already running way too deep for that.
Chapter Six
Kate drew a deep breath, then reached up and rang the bell on the parsonage. She wasn’t sure exactly why she had followed through and made an appointment with Reverend Jacobs, except that she had been struck by the calm and peace he radiated even in the face of personal tragedy. She sensed that he had found the answers to some of life’s harder questions, and that he might also have some of the answers she needed. It couldn’t hurt to find out, especially since Anna had agreed to keep Sarah for an extra hour after school so Kate could take care of some “personal” business.
The door swung open, and Reverend Jacobs smiled at her kindly. “Kate. It’s good to see you again. Come in.”
She stepped into the foyer, and as the minister led her toward his office he paused beside an older woman seated at a word processor.
“Kate, this is Margaret Stephens. She’s been with me for…how long, Margaret?”