by Sherry Ewing
“Ye try my patience, woman. All these many years of knowing ye and I had no idea ye had a son,” he grumbled, taking his hand and wiping it across his brow.
“No one knows. He is all but dead to me. As far as I am concerned, I have no son.”
“Well, he certainly is claiming ye as his mother despite ye wanting nothing tae do with him. Whatever he wants, he is more than willing tae go the whole length of England tae find ye, especially him being this far north.”
“I care not what he wants from me.” She gave him another push to put more distance between them but Killian barely moved.
Killian continued to watch her closely. Unshed tears pooled in her eyes. “What are ye not telling me? What did yer son do that was so horrible he continues tae have a hold over yer heart even though ye do not claim him as kin?”
“I do not wish to speak of it. Leave it be, Killian.” Ella gave a low moan of anguish, her inner turmoil clearing rushing across her features once more.
“I think ye need tae unburden yer soul for I can see for myself ye have been holding yer emotions in check long enough,” Killian murmured. “Tell me what he did.”
A snarl burst from her lips like a wounded animal before she pounded her fists upon his chest. “Faramond threw me out of my own castle. That is what he did!”
“Why would he dishonor ye, his own mother, in such a manner?” he urged her to continue.
“I had confessed my true origins after my husband passed. My own son called me a witch and sent me from the only place I felt safe. I had nothing but the clothes on my back, the damn bloody bastard,” she cried out, collapsing in his arms in a heap of despair.
Her tears tore at his heart, for he had not heard such suffering in many a year. Aye, she had indeed held her emotions in for far too long, if the river of tears soaking his tunic was an example of how she was feeling. He picked her up, even though she protested while still clutching at his tunic. She weighed next to nothing as he carried her to one of the window seats set into the rock wall. Keeping her on his lap, he leaned over to open the shutter to let in the ocean breeze.
She hiccupped, still trying to take in huge gulps of air to calm herself. She made an attempt to disengage herself from his arms but he only tightened them around her. “Dinnae fash yerself, Ella. I vowed I would keep ye safe and keep ye safe I shall, even it if means I must needs take ye myself tae see yer lover.”
Where such a commitment came from, Killian had no idea. Now that he had made the promise, he was not sure if he would be able to just stand idly by while he handed the woman he cared about over to another man. He had never acknowledged his feelings towards Ella to anyone but himself, but she had unknowingly owned his heart for several years now. How could he have confessed such inner yearnings when he knew she pined away for another?
“He was never my lover,” she murmured, almost giving him hope. Wiping her eyes, she gazed upon him sheepishly before scooting off his lap. “I am most sorry for breaking down in such a manner. I do not know what came over me, for I always thought I was made of sterner stuff. What you must think of me.” She turned her head to look out at the dark night sky.
“Ella…”
“This is so embarrassing.” She buried her face in her hands to hide from him.
“Ella…” He tried again to coax her to look upon him. When his words failed, he reached over, took her hands from her face, and tipped her chin up so he could see directly into her eyes.
His only thought was to give her the reassurance she needed, that he would keep her safe. But as he searched her face while staring into her trusting eyes, he knew he was forever lost. He was about to tell her they would ride out before the dawn. Truly, such was his intention. But as he watched her lips part to draw a deep breath, any thoughts of remaining level headed fled in that one instant as the time and space between them seemingly stood still.
He knew he would regret his rash decision, but Killian did not care. To hell with what he should and should not do! He would take and treasure this one moment, for he knew her heart belonged to another. But right now, in this very instant, Ella belonged to him. Without any further thought, and before he changed his mind, he lowered his head to kiss her lips.
Chapter 6
Ella had known the moment Killian had picked her up that something had shifted inside her world. Surely such a sensation was caused by her despair at seeing her son for the first time in many years. She could not deny Faramond’s presence had rattled her wits. What kind of a mother was she that she was afraid of her own flesh and blood? How had she failed him?
But thoughts of her son drained away the instant Killian pressed his lips against her own.
Their breaths mingled on a heartbeat. Soft. Gentle. Searching. ’Twas an exploration of two beings trying to find one another while a rush of excitement shivered within their souls. A groan escaped her parted lips as she drew in her next breath. Never before had she felt such a deep yearning as she did now.
She knew what it was to live on the outside, yearning for the romance that had passed her by. This kiss was outside of her experience.
Killian must have taken the sound as encouragement for his arms wrapped around her bringing her closer. She reached out to cup his cheek, feeling the stubble of growth across her fingertips, while her other arm snaked around his neck. Her fingers curled into his hair as though she were holding onto him for support. She could feel his hand as it made its way through her hair with a caress. Slanting her head, he took full advantage of the opportunity presented to him as his tongue plunged into her mouth to dance with her own.
If Ella had not been sitting down, she surely would have fallen to the ground in a heap of pleasure. Wave after wave of desire coursed through her as though she had craved this man’s touch her entire life. He made her forget everything but this moment. She cared not when he lifted her once again and she found herself sitting upon his lap. His arms wrapped themselves around her once more and she felt as if she were secured in a cocoon of warmth and comfort. He made her feel safe for the first time in more years than she could remember and she gave herself completely to this man who had addled her wits with just one kiss.
She gulped in air when his lips traveled to her neck. How long had it been since someone had actually made her feel? She whispered his name and all the sensations coursing through her body came to a screeching halt. He pushed her from his lap and Ella opened her eyes to stare at him in confusion. Her eyes widened when she realized her mistake.
Killian quickly stood and stepped back. The space between them was far greater than the few footsteps he had taken to distance himself from her. “I am not Henry,” he muttered through clenched teeth.
His words, although uttered quietly, sounded to her ears as though he bellowed them from the parapet high above the castle keep. “Aye, I know. I am sorry,” she murmured, not sure how she could mend the hurt flashing across his angry face. She had wounded him deeply and such had not been her intention.
“’Tis my own fault. I knew yer heart belonged tae another. I will not again make the mistake of thinking ye could come tae care for me.”
“’Tis not about how I feel for you, Killian. You have been a friend to me since I first walked inside Berwyck’s gates.”
“Ack… a friend.” He gave a sarcastic chuckle. “I have always been just a friend tae ye and that is the way I should have kept what we have between us. I promise ye I shall not attempt tae kiss ye again.”
“Killian, please… Let me explain,” Ella attempted to placate him, but ’twas of no use. Whatever had briefly passed between them was now completely gone and ’twas all her fault.
“Nay. There is nothing tae explain, Ella. ’Tis obvious yer heart belongs tae another and I will see tae it ye are returned tae his side. Now, come. Amiria awaits us in her solar.” He held out his hand motioning towards the passageway.
“I cannot see Amiria now.” She touched her sensitive lips for she swore she could still feel Killian’s
mouth upon her own. She knew without a doubt Amiria would take one look at her and know something had happened between Ella and Killian. Shame coursed through her, knowing she had momentarily been unfaithful to the man she fell through time to be with.
“Then I will see ye tae yer chamber and explain tae Amiria we will leave before dawn breaks. An early departure should give us a fair enough lead before yer son attempts tae follow or find us.”
True to his word, he escorted her down the corridor ’til they stood before her door, the silence between them crackled like lightning bolting across a thunderous sky. He put his hand upon the latch to open the portal for her but she unthinkingly put her own hand upon his arm to halt his progress. Before she thought better of her actions, she wound her arms around his waist and rested her head upon his chest.
“Thank you for escorting me tomorrow, Killian,” she whispered. “I have been wanting to be reunited with him for a long time.”
He mumbled something beneath his breath she could not make it out, and yet he at last took hold of her in a fierce embrace. Such comfort did not last long. He took her by her arms to pull her away only an instant later. Yet, he did not let go but instead rested his forehead against her own before heaving a weary sigh.
“Ye may be thanking me for taking ye tae him, but, honestly, I do not think ye really know what ye truly want, Ella,” he declared. His tone was so sincere and Ella realized she had hurt him once more.
Before she could make any attempt to answer, he placed a quick kiss upon her forehead, reached behind her to open the door and gave her a gentle push inside her chamber.
“Bolt the door and get some rest,” he ordered, his face bland to mask his feelings. But she could see them laid bare before her with just one look. Aye, he was hurt and she was to blame. “The morn will be upon us before ye know it.”
The door shut and with its closing Ella felt as though all energy went rushing from her body. She put the bolt in place, her hand lingering on the wood. Only then did she hear Killian’s footsteps receding down the passageway.
Her heart still racing, she all but put fell into a chair set by the hearth. Tears of regret pooled in her eyes before they fell down upon her cheeks. Why did she, of a sudden, feel so despondent Killian was gone from her side? She was getting what she wanted, was she not? The only thing that had kept her sanity all these years was the thought of being with Henry once more.
For nigh unto thirty years her only thoughts had been to stay alive so she would one day be able to return to his side to become his wife. She had even married another man for the sake of her great love, binding herself to the twelfth century.
She smiled at the memory of their first encounter at a quiet countryside tavern. He had entered the dimly lit room and he had told her later he had been blinded to anyone but her upon first espying her sitting at a corner table. Terrified and alone, she nodded to the vacant seat when he offered to buy her meal if she would but spare this mortal a few moments of her time.
Simon had charm and an abundance of it to flatter any woman who crossed his path. But he had been smitten with her from the start and wasted no time in pressing his suit in his favor. He had known from the very beginning she loved another. In fact, she made it clear her heart was spoken for. Yet he still professed his love would not falter and swore to protect her all of her days if she would but agree to marry him.
They wasted little time in seeking out a priest to bless their union and even less time before she was pregnant with their son. Simon had been faithful to her, as far as she knew, ’til the day of his passing. If only she could have come to love him as much as he professed to love her.
She had lived all these years for the chance to change the ending of her encounter with Henry. If she had stayed to persuade him instead of running, she would never have fallen into a time slip, and lost this past thirty years. It had been the mistake that shaped the rest of her life. Why, then, did she feel as though ignoring her attraction to Killian was the biggest mistake of her entire existence?
Chapter 7
The hours before dawn left a chill in the air. Two saddled horses whinnied as though in protest they were no longer in the warmth of the stable. Killian made his way to them, checking the leather straps to ensure everything was secure. Once he was satisfied the lads had done a proper job, he saw that his belongings and some foodstuff were tied to the back of the saddle.
His black horse stomped its front hoof before pawing at the ground. Nostrils flaring, he snorted, turning his breath to a light mist from the frigid morn. He nudged Killian, who brought his hands to his mouth to blow his own warm air into them to take the chill from his fingers. He gave the steed a pat.
“’Twill do ye no good tae be complaining, Mystic. Ye may not care ye are out at this hour but we are traveling this day whether ye like it or not.” Killian received another push, causing him to voice his displeasure at the animal. “Behave, ye ornery beast,” he scolded. Mystic nickered and shook his glorious black mane as though laughing at his master.
Killian had just secured his weapons on his horse when he saw Ella, Amiria, and Dristan approaching.
“You must make haste, Killian,” Dristan said, carrying a torch to light their way. “I cannot vouch for how long we can keep Faramond occupied before he decides to continue his search for Lady Ella.”
Amiria and Ella hugged one another. “Killian will keep you safe,” Amiria declared, “but you must ride hard and fast to put as many miles between you and your son.”
Killian watched Ella’s face blanch in the torch light. “Ride? I cannot ride,” she huffed. “Why do you think I have walked wherever my feet would take me?”
“Ye never learned tae ride?” Killian asked, trying not to curse.
“There was never any need. Besides, I am perfectly capable of walking or riding in a cart.”
“God’s Bones, woman! We have no time tae be walking nor taking a leisurely ride about the countryside in a wagon,” Killian growled. “Or would ye rather have yer son take ye back tae Hull?”
“You are shouting at me again,” Ella answered, crossing her arms on her chest.
“I am not!”
“Aye, you are, and now you find it necessary to argue with me as well.”
Killian clenched his fists trying to calm down. She was so frustrating at times. “Then answer me,” he said calmly, although he was anything but calm. “Do ye wish tae be taken tae Hull?”
“You already know the answer to your question. Besides… you promised to keep me safe and take me to Henry. Are you going back on your vow?”
“Ye know I am doing no such thing.”
Ella smiled as though the argument had been won in her favor. “Then we shall be walking.”
She began to stroll past Killian but he grabbed her arm. “Nay, we ride,” he ordered.
Dristan stepped forward. “If the two of you would cease your squabbling, you would both realize neither of you will win your point. Ella, you cannot walk all the way to your destination in time for the appointed hour when everything you have waited for and said will occur. Further, you will be caught. I do not know what Faramond is up to, but I know he is not to be trusted. Killian, you know very well this situation is not a time for a lesson on how to ride a horse.”
Amiria ordered a stable lad to fetch a pillion before giving Ella a nudge towards Killian. “Enough of this. You know I love you both but you are driving me mad. I have never met two such stubborn people more made for each other than the two of you.”
Dristan laughed. “I might argue such a point, my love.” He took the cushion from the lad when he returned and attached it behind Killian’s saddle.
Amiria joined in his merriment and poked him in the chest. “You and I will settle this later in the lists, my lord. As for you two,” she said pointing towards the horses, “Ella will ride with Killian. You can tether the other horse and switch off as they tire.”
“But my lady—” Ella began to protest but Killian
lifted her up onto the pillion.
“He will keep his promise, Ella. Trust him and trust what is in your heart,” Amiria said.
Dristan clasped Killian’s hand. “Make for Warkworth. Riordan and Katherine will give you shelter so the horses can rest before you must travel again.”
Killian nodded before Amiria came to embrace him in a fierce hug. She tugged on his tunic and he leaned down so she could whisper in his ear. “All will work out as it should, Killian. Do not lose hope that you can still have your heart’s desire.”
“How did you know?” he murmured in puzzlement. How could this woman he had known since she was a mere bairn read him so openly?
“We women just know these things.” She kissed his cheek before returning to her husband’s side. “God speed and return to us soon.”
Killian tied Ella’s horse to his saddle before he mounted. Ensuring the woman was as comfortable as possible, he waved his hand in farewell. A slight motion of his heel and they were on their way as his horse obeyed his command to move. With the closing of the barbican gate, Killian picked up the pace and made for the beach. Dawn would break soon and he would make use of the blanket of darkness to keep them concealed. They would need to ride hard. Daylight would soon be upon them.
Chapter 8
Faramond awoke, irritated his slumber was disturbed by some unknown force. His nose twitched and he waved his hand in front of his face to get rid of whatever had been annoying him in his sleep. Instead of perchance encountering an insect buzzing around his head, his fingers came in contact with long strands of brown hair before he remembered how he had spent what he could recall of the night. The wenches at Berwyck were certainly most accommodating, or at least one was.
Ale had flowed freely last eve, especially after Lord Dristan ordered a keg brought up from the cellars. His knights had appeared more than happy the festivities continued far into the early morn. Faramond had hoped the drink would loosen their tongues so he could glean some information his mother had visited Berwyck at some point. Unfortunately, all his questions only earned him another round as his tankard was refilled again and again. ’Twas not long before his head began to spin and he made his way up to his chamber.