When Matt was out of her life, was the implication. Katie was about to tell Olivia that it was already over between them, when she was caught by a thought. What did it matter to Olivia if Katie and Matt dated? The other night, she’d seemed to already know, from the growing scuttlebutt around town, that they were an item. And yet, until today, she hadn’t said a word or threatened to hold back business from the shop.
Then Katie remembered Matt’s comment to Olivia about wanting answers. Olivia had paled and run out of the country club. Like someone with something to hide.
Maybe there was a lot more to Olivia’s part in the tragedy about their baby’s death and their divorce, than anyone knew. Was Matt blaming himself for something that wasn’t his fault?
“I realize there might be some bad feelings between you and Matt,” Katie ventured.
Olivia snorted. “Of course there are.”
“It’s been eleven years. It seems to me that’s a long time to be—”
“Devastated? Betrayed?” Olivia took a step closer. “From what I’ve heard, you know a lot about feeling betrayed yourself. Being dumped at the altar is nothing compared to what I went through.” She blinked, a glimmer of tears in her eyes. “So don’t start telling me when it’s time to get over it.”
“I wasn’t, I just…” Katie sighed.
“Let’s drop the subject. It’s not one of my favorites.” With shaking fingers, Olivia whisked an invisible piece of dust off her cranberry suit. “I’m late for an appointment. I’ll be in touch if I need your shop’s services again.” She strode out the door, letting it shut with a slam.
The air in the room seemed to descend like a heavy blanket. The glove had been thrown down by Olivia. She’d made it clear that involvement with Matt put far more than Katie’s heart in jeopardy—it also threatened the store. Katie’s priority, ahead of any relationship, any man, had to be the shop. She and Sarah both depended on it for income.
Katie slumped into a chair. She’d ruined everything. Olivia had no intention of giving any more business to A Pair of Posies. She seemed intent on distancing herself from Matt, and by extension, Katie.
Still, something nagged at Katie about the whole conversation. Certainly, Olivia and Matt had suffered a great loss when their child had died. But why was she still so inflamed by the subject more than a decade later?
Sarah returned, waving a check. “The family was so pleased with the arrangement, they ordered a silk version for the nursery.”
Katie scrambled to her feet and grabbed her car keys off the ring by the register. “That’s great. Listen, I need to take care of something. Will you be all right here alone for a little bit?”
“Sure. But before you go, tell me how it went with Olivia.”
“Not good at all.” Katie pushed on the door handle. “But I’m about to try and fix that.”
“Dammit!” Matt yanked on the tie at his neck, pulling out his misguided attempt at a Windsor knot for the third time. “You’d think I’d never tied a tie before in my life,” he muttered.
He’d bought two of the damned things to wear with his equally new suit for the wedding. It had taken him nearly thirty minutes to get the first one on that night, and his skills hadn’t improved. He doubted Katie would be impressed if he wrapped it around his neck in one enormous ball. His idea was to show up at her store, dressed to the nines—since that had seemed to please her last time—and persuade her to go out on a date with him. A real one this time.
He yanked out the bulging knot again and wondered if it was possible for a tie to have a mean streak.
“Do you want some help with that?” His mother appeared at his side, startling him. She had always moved silently through the house, a feat Matt had yet to accomplish. It must have something to do with his big feet, a physical characteristic definitely not inherited from his mother.
“I’m all thumbs today.” He turned and faced her, giving up on the irritating piece of silk. He felt ten years old again, waiting for his mother to help him get ready for church.
“Your father isn’t so good at ties, either.” She deftly looped the fabric in and around in the classic knot. “I’ve tied his every morning for forty-one years. It’s a ritual with us.”
That was something he hadn’t known. His parents were not people who went through the daily intimacies of zipping back zippers and tying ties. They were companions who shared small talk over croissants and fresh-squeezed orange juice. He’d hardly seen them kiss, and certainly didn’t want to imagine how he had come to be.
Ever since he’d been back, he’d been learning things about his parents, and about himself, that shocked the hell out of him. Now that he was thirty, and presumably older and wiser, he realized he’d been wrong about a few things.
“Are you going to see that Katie you told me about?” She tugged and tightened, straightening the knot. They’d talked about Katie on Sunday, when his mother had asked what had him stalking around the house like a penned lion.
“Yes. And, I hope, convince her I’m not a total jerk.”
“You like her, don’t you?”
He dipped his head and met her gaze. “Yes, I do. She’s…special.”
“Hmm,” was all she said. Then she finished fastening the tie and patted it lightly. “There, all handsome now.” Her hand moved up to stroke his cheek. “You look so much like your father did when I first met him.” Her eyes glistened and there was a catch in her voice. “I think you ended up with the best of both of us, Matthew.”
The best of each of them? That was something he’d never considered and the implications of her remark warmed him. He had to clear his throat before he could speak. “Thank you, Mom.”
She brushed a lock of hair off his forehead and smiled. “You always were my little devil, running off, hell-bent on some idea or another. I never could keep you pinned down for long. Much like your dad.”
“There was so much of the world to see, so many things to do.”
“And after you saw the world and did all those things, you came home.” She hesitated. “To stay?”
He nodded. “There are some things here that I never found anywhere else in the world.” Like Katie.
She nodded, as if she’d read his mind. “Katie seems to be good for you.”
Matt turned to the mirror and fiddled with the tie. She might be good for him. But he knew sure as hell he was no good for her.
As much as he hoped for a different ending, he was enough of a realist to know it wasn’t possible. He could try to delay it by taking her to dinner, by seeing her one last time, but once she realized the truth about that night eleven years ago, she’d reject him as surely as his father had, blame him like Olivia did. Like he blamed himself.
Sweet Pea lay on the porch, snoring. The giant dog was sprawled across the top step and didn’t even bother to pick her head up when Katie stepped over her to reach the front door and ring the doorbell. “You’re quite the guard dog,” she said to the Doberman.
Sweet Pea grunted and went back to her puppy dreams.
“Whatever you’re selling, I ain’t buying,” Miss Tanner shouted before she’d finished opening the door. “Oh, it’s you.”
Katie stood firm on the porch. Miss Tanner had always been a formidable woman, and seemed even more so now, with her hair drawn into a severe bun and a broom in her hand. “I’d like to talk to you about something, Miss Tanner. Do you have a few minutes?”
“I’m in the middle of cleaning…”
Katie pulled out her trump card. “I brought some donuts along.” She held up a bag, opened it and withdrew one of the sweet confections. “And a cruller for Sweet Pea.”
The dog scrambled to her feet, nails clicking on the wood, and lunged for the cruller, snapping half of it off. Katie let out a squeak and dropped the rest of the donut on the porch, where it was promptly gobbled up by Sweet Pea.
“Donuts?” Miss Tanner leaned forward, peering into the bag. “Well, I guess I could use a break. For a few minute
s.” She opened the door wide enough for Katie to enter. Sweet Pea stayed on the porch, licking up every last crumb.
The inside of Miss Tanner’s house was nearly as severe as the woman—and her mother before her, from what Katie had heard about the family. Though Miss Tanner had never married, the rumor mill said she’d spent a few years “abroad” before coming back at twenty-one. She’d never left again. There’d been plenty of gossip about why Miss Tanner had become almost a recluse.
The house didn’t offer many clues. The front parlor had uncomfortable-looking furniture precisely arranged, white walls devoid of art or pictures. Then Miss Tanner led Katie into the kitchen. It was like a different house. Katie got the feeling this room was where the true spirit of Colleen Tanner existed.
The room was warm and bright, imbued with blue and yellow. A checked tablecloth, topped by a vase of fresh daisies, sat on the table. There was a stew simmering on the stove, and prints of flowers hung on the pale yellow walls. There was even a dog treat jar, painted to look like an enormous, fat pug.
“Sit down.” Miss Tanner gestured to a kitchen chair. She crossed to the sink, filled a kettle and placed it on the stove. “I’ll make some tea.” She bustled back with a pair of plates and napkins.
When Miss Tanner took a seat, Katie pushed the bag over to her. “They’re all for you.”
“Wonderful!” she crowed, digging in eagerly. “What did you want to ask?” She took a bite of a devil’s food donut.
“About Olivia. And Matt.”
Miss Tanner dropped the donut to her plate. Her entire demeanor shifted away from friendly. “I don’t want to talk about that man. He broke my niece’s heart after they lost the baby.”
“It was an awful tragedy. So unexpected,” Katie said, hoping Miss Tanner would fill in a couple of blanks.
“The women in our family are cursed.” Miss Tanner shoved the donuts away as if the conversation had killed her appetite. “Cursed in the men they marry, cursed with their babies.”
“What do you mean?”
“There isn’t a one of us who hasn’t had that fear, seen that loss. Or had it happen to us.” Miss Tanner’s voice was quiet, her gaze off in the distance somewhere. Katie realized one of the women Miss Tanner meant was herself. No wonder she’d been so protective of Olivia, so angry at Matt. Whatever had happened, had also happened to the woman across the table. “Olivia thought she might escape the curse, but she was wrong.”
“What curse?”
The tea kettle whistled and Miss Tanner shuddered. The softness left her features and she became the bitter woman Katie normally saw. She shoved away from the table and turned to the stove, silencing the kettle. “Nothing I need to be telling you about,” she said. “It’s family business.”
“I didn’t mean to pry.”
“Stay away from that man.” She shook a wrinkled finger at Katie. “Mark my words, he’ll break your heart like he broke Olivia’s. Men aren’t worth the skin they’re grown in.” She got to her feet, clearly done with Katie’s visit. “I have work to do.”
There was nothing more to be said. Katie suspected even a truckload of donuts wouldn’t change Miss Tanner’s mind.
“I need to get back to the store, anyway.” Katie said as she headed down the hall, Miss Tanner close on her heels. Miss Tanner reached past Katie, opened the door and waited.
Katie had failed on her mission. She’d hoped to unearth some deep family secret and all she’d gotten was something about a curse and a few choice words about how useless men were. So far, the new Katie was batting a thousand.
“Thank you, Miss Tanner,” she said.
Miss Tanner harrumphed. “For what?”
“For inviting me into your house. And for telling me a little more about Olivia. I’m sure it wasn’t easy to talk about.”
Miss Tanner looked taken aback. Surprised. Actually bordering on nice. “No, it’s not.” She dipped her gaze, but not before Katie saw her eyes mist. “The same thing happened to my baby, God rest his soul. And my sister’s second child, who would have been Olivia’s younger brother. The girls in our family ain’t meant to have sons.” Miss Tanner cleared her throat and straightened, her gaze scanning the sky. “It looks like rain.”
It didn’t, but Katie agreed anyway. She said goodbye and stepped over Sweet Pea on her way out. The dog lifted her head in a drowsy farewell.
Miss Tanner’s confession about her baby certainly made many of the rumors about her time “away” add up. Had she gotten pregnant and then been abandoned by the baby’s father? That, coupled with the loss of a child, must have been hard. Miss Tanner’s honesty, though, might just set another person free of a lifetime of pain.
There was only one place Matt would be right now, Katie decided. Mustering every bit of her new self, she took a chance and headed for the man who’d just broken her heart.
Chapter Ten
The new suit no longer looked new. Matt had draped the tie over a pile of lumber, tossed the jacket onto a sledgehammer handle. His pants and shoes were coated with sawdust; the shirt plastered to his skin in a wrinkled, sweaty mess.
He probably should have changed before coming out to the house. But when he’d reached Katie’s store, only to find out she wasn’t there, he’d needed a place to vent his frustration. He hadn’t thought about what he was wearing—all he wanted was the familiar feel of a hammer in his hands. It was either work or beer, and he wasn’t about to go down the beer path again.
He dragged a pair of two-by-tens over to the bearing wall he was creating. He parked his wing tip against the two of them, keeping them in place, then bent forward and drove a ten-penny galvanized nail into the wood.
“Nice view.”
For a second, he didn’t move. Was that Katie’s voice? Damn, he sure hoped so. The hammer dropped to the floor with a clatter and Matt spun around. “Hey.”
Way to go, Matt. Nice loss for words.
“Hey yourself.” She gestured toward the wood. “Need some help?”
“Uh, yeah. Sure.” He had the vocabulary of a Cro-Magnon man. “You’re not really dressed for it, though.”
She chuckled. “Neither are you.”
He shrugged. “I forgot to change.”
She reached into her bag and pulled out a bottle of soda. It was covered with a thin layer of frost. “I brought you something to drink.”
He took the bottle, ran the icy container between his hands. “Thank you. Is this why you stopped by?”
“No. I have something to tell you.”
Hope sparked within him. “What?”
“Olivia came by the shop earlier. She canceled her order.” Katie frowned. “She seemed extremely angry and more than a little worried about seeing me with you. That bothered me, so I went to see Miss Tanner. She told me something interesting about Olivia.”
Matt turned away. “I told you, I don’t want to talk about her.”
“Matt.” Her voice was soft. “You can’t let what happened that night rule the rest of your life.”
He wheeled back. “Yeah, I can. You don’t know me very well. You don’t know how badly I can disappoint people.”
She glanced away, and he remembered she’d already had a taste of that from him, too. He was lower on the evolutionary scale than Cro-Magnon man. Even a caveman wouldn’t lash out at a woman who wasn’t doing anything wrong.
“I shouldn’t have said that.” He twisted the cap off the bottle but didn’t drink. “Damn it, Katie. You don’t understand. Nobody does. What happened that night—”
“Might not have been your fault.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Miss Tanner said something that made me think there might be more to what happened than you know. Did Olivia ever mention a curse?”
“Curse?”
“Well, that’s what Miss Tanner called it. But I think she meant something genetic. She told me her own infant had died, and so had her nephew, Olivia’s baby brother. Then she said something about
how the women in her family weren’t meant to have sons.”
“I remember Olivia telling me about her little brother,” Matt said. He set the bottle on a post, still untouched. “But she told me he was stillborn. What happened to the other babies?”
Katie shook her head. “I don’t know. Miss Tanner didn’t tell me anything else.”
He crossed to a pile of lumber and took a seat. Katie laid a hand on his shoulder. “Matt, was there an autopsy?”
“I…I don’t know,” Matt said. “I left town after the hospital told me it was SIDS. I couldn’t bear to be there one more second.”
“You’re blaming yourself for something that probably isn’t even your fault.”
“What Miss Tanner said doesn’t change what I did. Blaming Olivia won’t—” He leapt to his feet. “There are things about me, about my past, that you don’t know.”
“Matt, the past—”
“Will affect the future.” He lowered his head. “Maybe once I tell you, you’ll understand why relationships and me are a bad idea.”
“Okay.” She took a seat on the stack of lumber. He paced for several minutes before finally settling beside her. He steepled his fingers under his chin, hesitating.
Katie waited quietly. Any other woman would have been nagging and cajoling him. Katie wasn’t any woman, though. In the hazel depths of her eyes, he saw the reflection of concern. Of caring. Maybe even the beginnings of love.
Already, he had a feeling he was in too deep. Like a hummingbird anxious about staying too long in one place, the thought of settling down flitted through his mind. Just being near her, in this house where hope used to live, was making him consider things he’d written off long ago—those age-old words every man pranced around like a racehorse just before the gate opened—commitment and marriage.
He’d been in that starting gate once before, with Olivia. The end of his marriage, which had really begun the day he’d slipped the ring on Olivia’s finger, had been an avalanche of hurt. What he’d learned from that experience should be included in every boy’s puberty handbook—how not to be seduced by a woman who lied as easily as she smiled.
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