by Cat Lavoie
“I’ll go tell everyone,” I say. I look at Steffi’s swollen face and touch her cheek. “Izzie’s going to go up with you. I’ll be there in a minute, okay?”
She nods and I can see that she’s scared. It takes everything I have to leave her and walk out of the room. I look back and watch as Nurse Goody and another nurse wheel her bed down the hallway, Izzie following right behind.
I find Ethan and Ollie in a tiny waiting room. Ethan is drinking coffee and examining the posters stuck to the wall. Ollie is sitting down and staring into space. Ethan sees me and taps Ollie on the shoulder, pointing in my direction. I’m surprised that neither of them has a black eye or any other obvious injury.
“What’s happening?” Ollie asks.
“They’re bringing her up to the delivery room right now.”
“It’s time? Already? Can we go?”
I nod. “There’s a waiting room up there. Follow me.”
It could have been a little awkward riding in an elevator alone with Ethan and Ollie but since I’ve just experienced a pretty traumatic cab ride, this is a piece of cake. In fact, I’m quite grateful for the silence and the occasional glance or two.
“I’ll be back as soon as I know anything,” I say, leaving Ethan and Ollie in the maternity ward waiting room. There are people waiting with balloon bouquets and flowers and the walls are covered with posters depicting the Stages of Childbirth. I feel sorry for Ethan and I’m just about to take him aside and ask him to go home when I hear Steffi scream out.
It doesn’t take long to find her room. I just follow the sound of a familiar voice pleading for drugs. When I get in the room, Doctor Bradford is sitting on the stool again. I rush to Steffi’s side and follow Izzie’s lead, grabbing her arm and supporting her back.
“Please give me the drugs. The baby book said I could have drugs. Right, Rox? Tell them,” Steffi says, looking at me.
So now she believes in the baby book. “Is there anything you can do?” I ask Nurse Goody.
She shakes her head. “It’s too late for an epidural.” She smiles at my sister. “You can do this, sweetheart.”
I feel my sister’s grip tighten on my arm. “No, I can’t. I want drugs. My sister’s a great lawyer. She’ll sue the hospital. Izzie, call your office and have them book a courtroom or something.”
I can see a faint smile on Nurse Goody’s lips again as she takes a look at the machines hooked up to my sister. She must hear this all the time. “You’re doing great, Steffi. The baby’s heartbeat is strong. That’s one tough cookie you got in there. What do you say we work together to bring your little one out here soon?”
Steffi nods, tears streaming down her face. Izzie and I stare at the machine recording the baby’s heartbeat. Beep-Beep-Beep.
Doctor Bradford pokes his head out from between Steffi’s legs. “Okay, Steffi. I need you to give me some big pushes. We’re going to see the baby’s head soon.” He looks at Izzie and me. “Want to come see?”
“No thanks,” I say, feeling the color drain out of my face. I hate looking like a wimp in front of Doctor Bradford, but I prefer to keep the miracle of life at a safe distance.
Izzie and I hold on to Steffi as she pushes and screams, letting her fall back on the bed between efforts. “You’re doing great,” I tell her, trying to ignore the fear in her eyes.
Doctor Bradford calls out to her. “One more push, Steffi. A big one. You can do it, Steffi. Good. Good. The baby’s crowning. Okay, stop. Now just breathe. Breathe. Great. Here we go.”
I stretch my neck to see what’s happening but I can’t see anything. I look at Izzie but she’s shaking her head. The nurses are blocking her view too.
“Congratulations, Steffi. You have a beautiful baby girl,” Doctor Bradford says after a few agonizing seconds of silence.
I see Nurse Goody whisk the baby to the other side of the room and my heart sinks. Shouldn’t she be crying?
“Why isn’t she crying?” Steffi asks, looking at me.
“I’m sure everything is fine,” Izzie says, but her voice is shaky.
Izzie and I are unable to move, stuck to Steffi’s bed while the doctor and the nurses are on the other side of the room. After what seems like ages, the silence is broken by a piercing cry.
Steffi starts to cry too and Izzie and I join her. Even Nurse Goody has a tear in her eye as she brings the baby to Steffi. Doctor Bradford isn’t crying, though. A good soap opera doctor never loses his cool.
I might be a little biased, but I think that my niece is the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. We stare at her lying on Steffi’s chest. Her skin is pink and she already has an impressive head of dark hair like her mother had before she started dying it. I can already tell that’s she’s going to have us wrapped around her little finger. But it’s the cutest little finger in the world.
I’m staring at the baby, completely in awe, when Steffi takes her eyes away from her daughter for a second and squeezes my hand.
“Can you get Ollie, please?”
Chapter Twenty
Izzie takes my hand as we leave Steffi’s room and head towards the waiting area. Neither of us says a word.
I can hear my mother before I see her. “I don’t know, James. Go ask one of the nurses over there. They must know something.” I can just imagine her pacing back and forth, driving my father mad.
When Izzie and I walk into the waiting room, Mom stops pacing and everyone looks at us, except for Ollie who’s sitting with his head in his hands. I scan the room for Ethan but he’s not there. It must have been too uncomfortable for him with my entire family here. I’m happy he decided to go home. I’ll call him later when a bit of the dust has settled. I’m not going to go back on my decision, but he deserves more than what he got from me at the Quid. We need to end things properly.
“Oh, for God’s sake, one of you say something,” Mom says, throwing her hands in the air. I can see from Ollie’s face and the way he’s perched on the edge of his chair that those are his thought exactly. With maybe a few curse words added in there for emphasis.
I look at Izzie. “Go ahead.”
She clears her throat. “It’s a girl. She’s gorgeous and healthy.”
“Thank God,” Mom says, taking both of us in her arms. “How is she doing?”
Dad comes in closer. “Yes, how’s my princess?”
“She’s great,” I say. “Tired but fine. She did everything without any drugs.”
Mom’s hand flies to her mouth and her eyes well up. She’s the only one in this room who knows what it feels like to give birth and since Izzie has an abnormally-large head, I’m sure she can appreciate what Steffi’s been through.
I look over at Ollie. “You’re all going to see the baby soon, but for now Steffi wants to see Ollie.”
“Really?”
I nod and he gets up, wiping his hands on his jeans. Dad gives him a pat on the back and Mom smiles at him. I can’t help but tear up when I see that. My parents have always treated Ollie like their own.
“Listen, son,” Dad says to Ollie. I turn my back but I can still hear what he’s saying. “You’re a part of this family. Now more than ever. It may not be the best of circumstances but we’ll work it out ... that’s what families do.”
I can’t see it but I can hear Mom and Dad hug him.
When Ollie puts his hand on my shoulder, I turn around and see that he’s been crying as much as I have. We laugh and wipe away our eyes.
“Go meet your daughter,” I whisper in his ear, wrapping my arms around him. “She looks just like you.”
And then, watching him walk down the hallway towards Steffi’s room, that’s when I know for sure. I love him. There’s no doubt in my mind. I feel a bit relieved, actually. I love Oliver Frost. And even though I know I’m not going to do anything to mess up his life with Rachel, I’m glad that I’m able to admit it myself. If only my friends were here. They’d be so proud.
“Are you okay, pumpkin?” Dad asks, taking a cup of coffe
e from Izzie. “You seem a little distracted.”
“I’m okay, Dad,” I say, shaking my head. “But there’s something I need to tell all of you.”
I take a deep breath and tell my parents and sister about breaking up with Ethan and leaving Kilborn.
They look at me, stunned, and I brace myself for a lecture on fiscal responsibility.
“Finally,” Dad says, smiling. “You’ve realized that you don’t belong there. What are you going to do now?”
I’m taken aback and have to sit down before I can answer. “Well, Adam offered me a job at the Quid. It’s minimum wage and everything, but you know how much I love that place. And I had this idea... it’s a bit crazy.”
“What is it?” Izzie asks. I’m surprised her head hasn’t exploded at the news that I quit my job. That new therapist she’s been seeing must be good.
“Catering,” I say, letting the word float out there. “I want to have my own catering business. I was thinking of starting with small things like birthday parties and office parties and, you know, maybe someday I could cater weddings and stuff.” Obviously, I’m going to have to work on a better business plan.
I wait for my parents and Izzie to tell me all about how hard it is to start a business and make it profitable. Maybe they could use a copy of the statistics Ethan surely has about the failure rate of small businesses.
“Do you realize that you had the biggest smile on your face right then when you were talking about starting a catering business?” Izzie asks.
I shake my head.
“I saw it too,” Dad says, looking at Mom who’s nodding her head in approval. “If this is what you want, pumpkin, we’re here for you. I think it’s a great idea and I would like to be your first customer and order a dozen chocolate cupcakes.”
Mom hits Dad on the shoulder. “Nice try, James. What would your doctor say? You know you can’t have refined sugar.”
“I’m just trying to be supportive, dear,” Dad says, stifling a laugh.
“I’ll do whatever it takes to help,” Izzie says. “I know a guy who can get me a great deal on business cards and flyers.”
As Izzie and my parents discuss how they’ll help promote my imaginary new catering business, I look at them and shake my head. I never realized how much I craved my parents’ approval and now—watching them so enthusiastic about something I’m doing—I take it all in.
“Roxy, can I talk to you?” I jump up when I see Ethan standing next to me. Where did he come from? I didn’t even notice him walk back into the waiting area.
I look over at my family. They’re still talking and haven’t noticed Ethan either. “Sure,” I say, walking over to a quieter section of the waiting room. I sit down but Ethan stays standing, pacing in front of me. The nice warm feeling I had just a few minutes earlier fades away and dread takes its place.
“You need to reconsider,” Ethan says, his voice calm. He fishes my ring out of his pocket. “I went to the Quid and got it back from Adam. Were you just going to leave it there? Doesn’t it mean anything to you?”
I shake my head. “Of course it means something.”
“Then take it back.” He stretches his arm and the ring is only a few inches from my face, but I can’t move a muscle.
“Dammit, Roxy.” He puts the ring back in his pocket. “You call me up and scare me half to death talking about an emergency and then you tell me you quit your job. You caught me off guard. Give me some time to get used to the idea.”
I look over at my parents and Izzie. It took them about half a second to get used to the idea. “I’m sorry, Ethan. I can’t marry you.”
“It’s Oliver, isn’t it?” Ethan raises his voice and, from the corner of my eye, I can see Izzie looking over at us.
I’ve never seen Ethan like this. His face is dark and his eyes are narrowed and I’m happy that Ollie isn’t in the room right now.
“This has nothing to do with Ollie,” I say, trying to calm him down. I instantly regret my choice of words.
“Of course it does,” he says, his voice booming. “Ollie, Ollie, Ollie. That’s the only thing that comes out of your mouth these days. How come I’m the bad guy in this scenario? Saint Ollie’s the one who knocked up your sister.”
Keeping my eyes focused on the ceiling, I open my mouth to say something but I’ve lost my voice. I’d get up and leave but my legs feel like jelly. I can’t explain to Ethan that, yes, I do love Ollie, but that’s not the reason I’m leaving him. He’d never believe me just like he’s never believed in me before.
“Answer me, Roxy.”
“Ethan. I think you should leave.” I’ve never been so happy to hear my sister’s lawyer voice. “The nurses are about to call security but I told them that you’d leave on your own. Quietly.”
Ethan doesn’t look at Izzie. “Do you want me to leave?” he asks me.
I peel my eyes off the ceiling and find Ethan’s face. We’ve had good times, him and me. He’s the first person I’ve ever been madly in love with, the one I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. Until today. Until now.
I nod and watch as he shakes his head and walks off, kicking a chair on his way out. So much for ending things properly.
“Are you okay?” Izzie asks, sitting down next to me. “I know I’ve always taken Ethan’s side over yours and I’m sorry. I’ll never meddle in your business again.”
I hug Izzie closer as my parents join in. “That was very brave,” Mom says, resting my head on her shoulder. “Tell me, is there anyone else?” she asks and, for a second, I’m sure she can read my mind.
Before I can answer Nurse Goody walks in, saving me from my mother’s glare. “Steffi wants to see you now.”
Chapter Twenty-One
“She’s so tiny,” Mom says for the tenth time, cradling her granddaughter. “Look at those little fingers and look at those little fingernails.”
For the last half hour, we’ve been taking turns holding the baby. The nurse said Steffi should try to get some sleep and we’ve been putting in a real effort to be quiet, but the silence is always broken by some sort of exclamation relating to something cute the baby did, like lifting her tiny mittened hand in the air or pursing her lips.
“Have you thought of a name?” Mom asks.
Steffi shakes her head. “I don’t need to think about it. I’ve known what the baby’s name was going to be for a while now. Boy or girl.”
I look over at Izzie and wonder if we’re thinking the same thing.
Please don’t call her Peanut. Please don’t call her Peanut.
“Really?” Mom says, giving the baby back to Steffi. “What’s it going to be?”
We all gather around Steffi’s bed as she looks down at her daughter, rearranging her tiny pink hat. “I thought a lot about this and I wanted something beautiful and meaningful.”
Here we go. I wonder if I’ll ever get used to calling my niece Sunshine Rainbow or Chanel Dior.
“I know we haven’t discussed it,” Steffi says, looking up at Ollie. “But I think you’ll like it. Her name is Cameron Quinn Rule.”
For a few seconds you could hear a pin drop in Steffi’s room. We just let it sink in. I look at Ollie and he’s trying hard not to cry, so I turn my head and look at my mother who has tears running down her cheeks. So does Izzie.
I can’t believe I ever doubted my sister’s ability to come up with something meaningful. She’s brought everyone to tears. Cameron was Ollie’s mother’s maiden name and Quinn is our mother’s maiden name.
“Cameron,” Ollie says, testing it out. “Cameron Quinn. It’s so beautiful. Thanks, Steffi. For remembering her.”
“I hope you don’t mind about the last name.”
Ollie laughs, shaking his head and rubbing his eyes. “Not at all. In fact, I’m thinking of changing my last name to Rule, so it’s perfect.”
“Cameron Quinn,” Mom says, picking her up. “When you’re older, I’m going to tell you all about your other grandmother. She was your daddy
’s mommy and she was my friend.”
How many times have I cried today? I’m surprised I’m not completely dehydrated.
“Mom, quit hogging Cameron,” Izzie says, reaching out for her.
I sit down and watch my sister and my mother fight over the baby. Despite the noise, Steffi finally falls asleep while clutching one of Cameron’s pink socks.
“Do you want to go for a walk?” Ollie asks.
I nod and follow him into the hallway. “I quit my job this morning,” I say, breaking the silence.
“Really, what happened?”
We spot a few empty chairs down the hall from Steffi’s room and sit down. For what seems like the twentieth time today, I go through the story of what happened with Greta.
“Wow,” Ollie says. “I’m so proud of you for standing up to Greta. So, what are you going to do now?”
The Million Dollar Question. But I finally have an answer for it. “I’m thinking of starting a catering business. I’ll be working at the Quid in the meantime.”
Ollie nods. “I think that’s a great idea. I really miss the Quid. I miss it a lot.”
What am I supposed to say to that? I really want to tell him that he belongs here with his daughter. I don’t want him to have to rely on pictures and emails and visits every few months to watch her grow up. He belongs here. With me. But I’m sure Rachel would disagree, so I don’t say anything.
“It’s been quite a day for both of us, huh?” Ollie says, smiling at me. “I’m a father now and you quit your job and broke off an engagement.”
I shrug. “Guess I’m kind of a clean slate. I get to start over now.”
“Clean slate. I like that.” He pauses for a second. “I think I might be one of those too.”
I turn my head and look at Ollie. He’s staring straight ahead but I can see it in his face. I feel my heart start to race a bit. Ollie hasn’t said a word and I’m not going to ask him any questions. Okay, maybe just one.