A House Full of Daughters

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by Juliet Nicolson


  Harold Nicolson Diaries and Letters, edited by Nigel Nicolson, Volume 3 (Collins 1968)

  Long Life by Nigel Nicolson (Weidenfeld & Nicolson 1997)

  Farming on a Battleground by A Norfolk Woman (Geo. R. Reeve Ltd 1950)

  The Five of Hearts by Patricia O’Toole (Ballantine Books 1991)

  Tottington: A Lost Village in Norfolk by Hilda and Edmund Perry (Geo. R. Reeve 1999)

  Mujeres Malagueñas en el Flamenco by Gonzalo Rojo Guerrero (Ediciones Giralda)

  The Disinherited by Robert Sackville-West (Bloomsbury 2014)

  Inheritance by Robert Sackville-West (Bloomsbury 2010)

  The Edwardians by Vita Sackville-West (Hogarth Press 1930)

  Knole and the Sackvilles by Vita Sackville-West (Ernest Benn 1922)

  The Land by Vita Sackville-West (Heinemann 1926)

  Pepita by Vita Sackville-West (Hogarth Press 1937)

  Portrait of a Marriage by Vita Sackville-West and Nigel Nicolson (Weidenfeld & Nicolson 1973)

  The Countryside of East Anglia by Susanna Wade Martins and Tom Williamson (Boydell Press 2008)

  The Richard Burton Diaries, edited by Chris Williams (Yale University Press 2013)

  Orlando by Virginia Woolf (Hogarth Press 1928)

  Acknowledgements

  I owe the idea for this book to a short essay on memoir that I wrote at the invitation of Johnny de Falbe and Dan Fenton at John Sandoe Books. To them and to the gifted Fenella Willis, I am grateful to have been given the opportunity to write about the sadnesses and the joys of past days.

  The staff of the London Library have, as ever, been unfailingly helpful to me and to Clemmie Macmillan-Scott, who immersed herself expertly on my behalf in the history of mid-nineteenth-century flamenco and in the social dance of late-nineteenth-century Washington, D.C.

  Joan Matthews and Bronwen Tyler, both local Norfolk historians, have been brilliant in enlightening me about wartime Norfolk and my mother’s schooldays in that county. Through them it has been a real pleasure to talk to my mother’s old school friends Margaret North and Katherine Powys, their brother John Walsingham and their niece Katherine Wolstenholme.

  Although this is a deeply personal book, I have depended enormously during the writing of it on the encouragement of a group of emotionally generous-spirited people. Among those I would like to thank for their invaluable help, encouragement, thoughts and memories are Catherine Allison, Patricia Anker, Tersh Boasberg, Kildare and Sarah Bourke Borrowes, Annabel Bryant, Caroline Bryant, Jilly Byford, Paul Calkin, Julie Campbell, Jennifer Combe, Margaret Engebretson, Anita Fischel, Alyson Flower, Sophie Ford, Antonia Fraser, David Fyfe-Jameson, Tom Grant, Kathy Hill-Miller, Victoria Hislop, Sam Macambulance, Fiona MacNeil Moss, Virginia Nicholson, William Nicholson, Jennifer Plunket, Shirley Punnett, Gail Rebuck, Diana Reich, Claire Skinner, Nicholas Stafford- Deitsche, Tom Stoppard, Monique Wolak and Timothy Young. I am also particularly grateful to Liz Bussey, whose amazing wisdom has strengthened me on innumerable occasions. And without the initial and then sustained encouragement by my brother, Adam, and then by Joanna Trollope, I am not sure the book would have been written at all.

  The insights of my dearest friends, all but one of them (though he is equally important too) daughters, have been invaluable, especially those of Belinda Giles, Anne Goldrach, Belinda Harley, Jeremy Hutchinson, Katie Law, Imogen Lycett Green, Julia Samuel, Aly Van Den Berg and Rachel Wyndham.

  Nuria Goytre guided me linguistically and expertly through the unravelling of the mysteries of Spanish flamenco. James Macmillan-Scott has been wonderful about the book from start to finish. Several of my cousins have helped me enormously with facts, photographs, memories and insights, among them Joanna Freeman, Mary Philipson, Jo Lascelles and Jeremy Till. Vanessa Nicolson has been unfailingly supportive. It has been a delight to reminisce with Mark Tennyson-d’Eyncourt and my aunt Juanita Tennyson-d’Eyncourt, whose knowledge of my mother’s family has filled in so many missing gaps. Bridget and Robert Sackville-West have been inexhaustibly hospitable, allowing me to spend fascinating and uninterrupted hours with family albums, papers, stories and treasures contained in the drawers, attics and rooms at Knole.

  My agent, Ed Victor, has, as always, been the greatest enthusiast and confidence-booster that any writer could ever wish for. I would like to thank him for his long and loving friendship and also his terrific colleagues Edina Imrik, Hitesh Shah, Maggie Phillips and Linda Vann in London and William Clark in New York for their support.

  At Chatto I have been immensely fortunate to find myself published by Clara Farmer and Becky Hardie. I am also grateful to Louise Court, Charlotte Humphery, Penelope Lietchti and Kris Potter for their enthusiastic work on this book’s behalf. And any author who finds themselves guided by the exemplary skill of my friend Becky Hardie should consider themselves more than blessed.

  I am truly honoured to be included on Jonathan Galassi’s distinguished list at Farrar, Straus and Giroux. He and his colleagues John Knight, Jeff Seroy and Ileene Smith have all been wonderful.

  The patience and encouragement of my family have sustained me throughout, especially that of Bean and of Sarah and Adam. Beloved Charlie has shown more tolerance and compassion than should be asked of any husband.

  Clemmie and Flora have been unwavering in their trust and love. In dedicating this book to them and to miraculous Imo, I thank them for … well … for everything really.

  The ‘Star of Andalusia’: Pepita in 1853

  The Villa Pepa, Arcachon, 1870

  Pepita and Victoria, 1867

  Victoria brushing her amazing hair, Washington, D.C., 1880

  Formally engaged, Victoria and Lionel, Knole, 1890

  Informally smitten, Victoria and Lionel, Knole, 1890

  Victoria with Vita, 1892

  Vita with ‘Boysy’, ‘Dorothy’, and ‘Mary of New York’, 1897

  Vita as a basket of wisteria, 1900

  Vita and Victoria out for a drive, 1899

  Vita and Lionel, Knole, 1903

  Vita as a bride with her bridesmaid Rosamond Grosvenor, the photo angrily censored by Victoria, 1913

  Vita with her boys, Ben and Nigel, Long Barn, 1923

  Vita and Hadji at the South Cottage, Sissinghurst, 1960

  Ice-skating at Lady Walsingham’s, Norfolk, 1940

  A happy Philippa (middle) leap-frogging with friends, 1946

  Nigel signalling his approval of his young fiancée, 1953

  Pamela and Gervaise, St Margaret’s, Westminster, 1926

  Philippa and Nigel, St Margaret’s, Westminster, 1953

  A wary quartet of in-laws leaves St Margaret’s: Vita, Pamela, Harold, Gervaise, 1953

  Philippa in tubercular isolation, Woods Corner, 1955

  Philippa, an apprehensive new mother, with Juliet, Shirley House, 1954

  Juliet and Romeo with Philippa and Nigel, Shirley House, 1956

  My favourite photograph: holding hands with my mother, the London docks, 1960

  Philippa, me, and my day-old brother, Adam, 1957

  A posed portrait of motherhood, London, 1962

  Philippa on the brink of departure, London, 1968

  Nigel’s favourite photograph of me, hole-punched for his diary, 1959

  Nigel at work in the gazebo at Sissinghurst, 1972

  Me and Nigel in the Lime Walk at Sissinghurst, 2003

  Three generations of daughters: Philippa, Vita, and me, Sissinghurst, 1959

  Feeding the ducks with Hadji at Sissinghurst, 1959

  Adam and me with Hadji, a week after Vita’s death, June 1962

  Me and James at Oxford, 1973

  Flora’s first visit to Sissinghurst, 1985

  Clemmie, Nigel, and Flora during a long Sissinghurst summer, 1989

  Clemmie and Flora, Brick House, upstate New York, 1991

  A house full of daughters, 1999

  Clemmie with her daughter Imogen Flora, 2013

  The streets where Pepita learned to dance: me in Malaga, 2014
<
br />   Me and Charlie, Greece, 2015

  The gates of the Villa Pepa: all that remains of Pepita’s house at Arcachon, 2014

  Me and Imo, 2015

  Imo playing in the sand, Arcachon, 2014

  Also by Juliet Nicolson

  The Perfect Summer

  The Great Silence

  Abdication

  A Note About the Author

  Juliet Nicolson is the author of two works of history, The Great Silence: Britain from the Shadow of the First World War to the Dawn of the Jazz Age and The Perfect Summer: England 1911, Just Before the Storm, and a novel, Abdication. As the granddaughter of Vita Sackville-West and Harold Nicolson and the daughter of Nigel Nicolson, she is part of a renowned and much-scrutinized family, and the latest in the family line of record-keepers of the past. She lives with her husband in East Sussex, not far from Sissinghurst, where she spent her childhood. She has two daughters, Clemmie and Flora, and one granddaughter, Imogen. You can sign up for email updates here.

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  Contents

  Title Page

  Copyright Notice

  Dedication

  Family Tree

  Introduction

  1. Pepita: Dependence

  2. Pepita: Independence

  3. Victoria: Bargaining

  4. Victoria: Loyalty

  5. Vita: Ambivalence

  6. Philippa: Loneliness

  7. Philippa: Trapped

  8. Juliet: Confusion

  9. Juliet: Escape

  10. Juliet: Guilt

  11. Clemmie and Flora: Forgiveness

  12. Imogen: Love

  Note

  Bibliography

  Acknowledgements

  Photographs

  Also by Juliet Nicolson

  A Note About the Author

  Copyright

  Farrar, Straus and Giroux

  18 West 18th Street, New York 10011

  Copyright © 2016 by Juliet Nicolson

  All rights reserved

  Originally published in 2016 by Chatto & Windus, Great Britain

  Published in the United States by Farrar, Straus and Giroux

  First American edition, 2016

  Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

  Names: Nicolson, Juliet.

  Title: A house full of daughters / Juliet Nicolson.

  Description: First American edition. | New York: Farrar, Straus and Giroux, 2016. | “Originally published in 2016 by Chatto & Windus, Great Britain” — Title page verso. | Includes bibliographical references.

  Identifiers: LCCN 2015042556 | ISBN 9780374172459 (hardback) | ISBN 9780374715328 (e-book)

  Subjects: LCSH: Nicolson, Juliet. | Nicolson, Juliet—Family. | Women authors, English—Biography. | Women historians—England—Biography. | Women—Biography. | Women—Family relationships. | Mothers and daughters. | Generations. | Intergenerational relations. | Family secrets. | BISAC: BIOGRAPHY & AUTOBIOGRAPHY / Personal Memoirs. | BIOGRAPHY & AUTOBIOGRAPHY / Women. | BIOGRAPHY & AUTOBIOGRAPHY / Literary.

  Classification: LCC CT788.N52 A3 2016 | DDC 306.874/3—dc23

  LC record available at http://lccn.loc.gov/2015042556

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