by Ally Forbes
‘I was to be married to a man who...well....wasn’t very nice. I left him a long time ago but he’s still looking for me. That lady was someone who was helping him.’
Esme looked thoughtful and then worried.
‘You won’t leave me and Dad will you?’
She needed to tell this little girl some more of the truth without breaking her heart and smashing her dreams.
‘Esme. Meeting you and your dad has given meaning and hope to my life and I really can’t think of a time when I’ve been happier. But you have to know that it’s early days for me and your dad. We’ve only known each other for the shortest of times and no matter what you wish and hope for....well.....sometimes........through nobody’s fault.........things don’t work out.’
Esme’s face fell.
‘I need you to know that sometimes adults, for lots of different reasons, end up not being friends anymore.’
Esme looked thoughtful.
‘That’s kind of like me and Abby at school. We were best friends and then we weren’t.’
Rachel smiled and took her hand.
‘Yes. Just like you and Abby. So just now your dad and I are best friends and I hope we remain best friends. But I need to let you know that sometimes friends ....well....’
‘Fall out.’ Esme finished, ‘I know all about that.’
Rachel nodded and tried hard to suppress a smile at the grown-up matter-of-fact way Esme spoke.
‘Well I’m sure that Dad and you will never fall out. Sometimes friends are friends forever.’
Rachel laughed. ‘Yes, you’re right. Sometimes friends are friends forever....come on. Let’s get back to your Dad. He must be wondering where we’ve got to. I just want to have a peek out the door first.....to make sure that that lady’s not around anymore.’
Esme out her hand out and said, ‘I’ll go first and check that the coast’s clear. I’m a pretty good spy you know.’
And before Rachel could say anything, Esme was off out the door, a few seconds later appearing back to give Rachel the thumbs up.
They strode out of the toilets hand in hand and back to the departure lounge. Eric was on the phone and smiled at them, motioning them to sit down.
‘Flight 597 to Halifax. Departing Gate 7.’ The announcement came loud and clear over the tannoy.
‘That’s us. That’s our plane Rachel.’ Esme could hardly contain her excitement. She made small jumps on the spot.
Eric finished his call.
‘Dad, our flight’s ready to go.’
Eric laughed. ‘Come on then, little sparrow. What’re you waiting for?’
He leaned over and kissed Rachel, putting his arm firmly round her waist.
‘How did the shopping trip go?’
‘Well.....great. I guess.’ She glanced at Esme, not able to keep the anxiety from clouding her face.
He looked at her quizzically.
Esme answered her father’s question.
‘It was awesome Dad. We had to hide from a lady in the toilets. She was looking for Rachel and I helped her to escape.’
Rachel nodded and sighed.
Eric’s face clouded immediately. His pace picked up and Rachel had to quicken her steps. Esme skipped along beside her
‘What happened Rachel?’
‘I saw Tom on his way out of the airport.’
‘Christ.’
Eric looked crestfallen.
‘I thought it wouldn’t come to this.’ He whispered.
Careful to keep her voice low enough for only Eric to hear she whispered, ‘I can leave now Eric. Keep you both out of this.’
He gripped her waist tighter.
‘No. Never,’ His voice was quietly vehement.
‘Look Rachel, I hoped Claire would leave us in peace, keep your anonymity. I don’t want anything or anyone getting in our way. Tom Sullivan means nothing to me.’
They boarded the plane and as they left Rachel breathed a sigh of relief, leaving her troubles firmly behind her, at least for a time. Rachel was in no doubt now that Tom would not give up until he found her. He had the time and resources to do so and now he had a trail to follow.
Eric sat quietly brooding in the seat beside her and she tried, for the moment at least, to put thoughts of Tom behind her.
And as they climbed above the clouds and started to cross the Atlantic, Tom Sullivan made his way to the remote Ariskaig peninsula in the back of a black chauffer driven Audi, determined to find the woman he loved and lost and to take her back home with him.
9.
Rachel, who normally hated flying, loved the flight to Halifax. Esme fell asleep in her arms, her earlier excitement tiring her out. Rachel absently stroked the little girl’s long dark hair and watched her sleep, marvelling again at her beauty and peace.
Eric watched them closely and gradually, the further they travelled from Scotland, started to talk again.
‘I’m sorry Rachel.’
She startled slightly, having been content to let Eric work through his dark mood in silence.
‘You’ve nothing to be sorry for Eric.’
‘I want us to get on with our lives now. I don’t want Tom Sullivan or Claire Edwards to get in the way. I don’t want to think about them.’
‘We’ve left that behind Eric. I think we should try to relax and get on with getting to know each other better. While we can.’
He took her hand and held it.
‘I want to be honest with you Rachel. I want to be honest because I want to be part of your life and I want you to be part of ours.....permanently’ He motioned to the sleeping Esme.
‘Eric I think we should take this slower....’
He interrupted her.
‘My head tells me we should take this slowly, I agree. But my heart can’t stand the thought of not being with you. I know that this time, for me, everything’s different......and ....I want to tell you more about myself. ’
He continued to hold her hand but gazed out of the plane window.
‘When we arrive in Halifax we’re going to one of my family’s homes. It’s...well...it’s a big place, one that is out of range for a normal family GP. I don’t want you to think that I’m some kind of drug or gun runner or anything...... illegal.’
He laughed quietly. He kept his gaze averted, focussing on some indeterminate spot on the distant horizon.
‘My family have many homes. They’re wealthy, well known in Canada. Harkett Industries.’
Rachel knew about Harkett Industries. It was a household name. She watched has large hand as it held hers. His hands were beautifully manicured, elegant, strong.
‘I was an only son and my father wanted me to follow him into the business but I had my own ideas. I wanted to be a doctor. I wanted to be independent, do my own thing.’
‘Becoming a doctor is a very admirable thing to wish to do.’
‘My father couldn’t hide his disappointment but I took a place at Harvard Medical School and we.....tolerated the situation, tolerated each other. In my last year at university, I got Sarah pregnant...and my relationship with my father broke down completely. It was one step too far for him. An act of rebellion that they found hard to accept. But it wasn’t an act of rebellion. It was just a bloody mistake. My parents met Sarah....it wasn’t like they didn’t try ....but Sarah......’
He paused and winced, a secret little expression that Rachel caught out of the corner of her eye.
‘Sarah had a chip on her shoulder about the wealth in the family, the silver spoon in my mouth and she.....was just....well...she went out of her way to be ....unpleasant. Looking back I guess it was the age we were.....the student thing. I think at that age we all have that streak of anarchy running through us. We’re all just trying to find our way in the world. Sometimes we ruffle others feathers...’
Rachel closed her eyes and leant her head back on the seat, listening to his deep, low voice.
‘I didn’t see my family again after that. I got a job in New York and work
ed to become a surgeon. To become a good surgeon, work has to come first. Sarah and I moved in together before Esme was born but almost from the first week we both knew that it wasn’t right. That we weren’t right for each other. By that time Sarah was nearly at her due date and we decided to try to give it a go. For Esme’s sake.’
He sighed quietly and paused, reliving the pain. Regret and a deep sense of responsibility opening old wounds. He looked at the sleeping Esme and the mere sight of her gave him strength to continue his story,
‘With hindsight it was the wrong thing to do. We had a brief honeymoon period after Esme was borne and then things deteriorated rapidly..........my work gave me the excuse I needed to stay away. We essentially lived separate lives under the same roof. I got a job in London. Sarah decided to come with me. I thought that the move might force a decision on us to separate but Sarah’s mother had just died and . Kst font s...I guess you cling to the status quo, no matter how bad things are. My workload increased in London and Sarah started drinking. And the rest......the rest is history.’
Without opening her eyes she asked, ‘Did your parents know about Sarah’s death?’
‘Yes. I kept them informed. I told them about Esme. I told them about the big things that happened...and....of course they wanted to meet Esme.’
‘And they didn’t?’
‘Sarah wouldn’t allow it. There was no love lost between them. It was simply easier for me to go with her decision at that time.’
‘Jeez.’ Rachel sighed.
‘I want to do things right this time. I want to build bridges again. Sarah and I....we were both young when we met. Stupid, stubborn. And it all went wrong. Badly wrong.’
‘We’ve all done stupid things. Made mistakes. You’re no different from every person on this planet. You can’t blame yourself.’
‘I can Rachel. There’s not a day that goes by that I don’t look at Esme and wish that I’d done things differently but ........’
Rachel gazed past Eric and let her mind float on the clouds below them, pondering their situations.
‘You tried to do the right thing Eric. You married Sarah, you were a father to Esme. It just didn’t work out.’ She added, ‘Does Esme know about her grandparents?’
Eric shook his head, ‘Sarah didn’t want them mentioned. Esme was always told that she didn’t have grandparents.’
Rachel said nothing to this revelation. Words could hardly express her dismay but she imagined the deep chasm that existed between Eric and Sarah; their different backgrounds, Sarah’s inability to accept, an unexpected pregnancy, an unhappy marriage, drink......She felt a deep sympathy for Sarah, a woman so trapped and unhappy in her situation that she felt her only way out was to take her own life. She sighed miserably.
Her hand continued to stroke Esme’s soft hair and she felt nothing but compassion and a deep desire to heal the wounds that must still be hurting this small girl.
Eric turned towards Rachel and pushed a stray strand of hair from her face, trailing a finger down her jaw and on to her neck.
‘I can’t wait to get us all to Halifax, to leave everything behind. Just the three of us.’
His fingers pulled aside the fabric of her blouse exposing a small area of her shoulder and he bent to kiss her skin. Rachel lent her head against his and kissed his hair.
His touch sparked on her skin and his scent sent stars shooting across her vision. No man had ever had this effect on her, her whole body pulled towards his like a comet into a planet’s irresistible gravitational force. Their attraction to each other was an elemental, irresistible force, something that she couldn’t fight.
He kissed her neck, his soft lips lingering on her skin making her draw in a deep breath.
‘I need to take you to bed Rachel. I really need to take you to bed...’ his voice was soft and urgent, his breath warm on her skin.
She turned her face to him and kissed him, slowly, gently. And it was as they kissed that she realised that she was falling inextricably and irretrievably in love with this man and his daughter. And for that moment she neither cared nor thought about the events that had led their paths to collide.
Esme stirred slightly on her lap and she pulled away from Eric, hoping that she wouldn’t have seen them kiss, worried how Esme might react to her dad kissing another woman. It was too late. Esme’s sleepy eyes were open and sheer delight spreading across her face.
Her arms spread out above her and hugged her father and Rachel together.
‘I knew you were the one Rachel. I knew it,’ she whispered. Rachel stroked her head and glanced at Eric. Despite her feelings for Eric, she still worried about Esme’s expectations of their fledgling relationship. In life when did things ever go to plan?
Eric bent and kissed Esme.
‘Hey sleepy head.’
‘Everything’s going to be alright Dad. I know it is.’ Her voice was soft and certain.
Eric smiled at her and nodded.
‘We’re going to be just fine. You, me and Rachel.’
He spoke directly and firmly and Rachel could tell by the tone of his voice that he believed, he truly believed, that this was the truth. His confidence was infectious and Rachel found herself excited about the future for the first time in a very long time.
She had been miserable while she was with Tom, feeling trapped with nowhere to go. When she had eventually left him, she had felt hunted. She had led a quiet and simple life, taking each day one at a time, always expecting the knock on the door, not daring to think about tomorrow.
She knew where Tom was and she knew that if he found out where she had gone, Eric would be there for her. She wouldn’t have to face Tom alone.
They were interrupted by the hostess offering lunch and they all ate well, Esme now fully awake and talkative.
Eric held her hand and stroked her arm absently, seeming not to want to let her move from his touch. She found this touching, this simple gesture of love.
‘I feel kind of excited nervous about going back to Halifax.....I used to love the place....’
His eyes were bright and wistful and his boyish excitement took years off him.
‘Sometimes this all feels like a dream Eric.....our meeting on the beach......giving up my job and coming here with you. It doesn’t seem real.’
He bent his head to kiss her again.
‘Does that feel real?’
She smile K smp> d at him and then closed her eyes. A gentle calm descended on her and the gentle hum of the aircraft engines and soft conversation around her lulled her into a dreamless sleep.
‘Rachel......Rachel....’ Eric’s soft whisper and gentle kiss woke her and for a moment she wondered where she was.
‘God. I was completely out of it.’ Rachel rubbed her eyes and yawned.
‘We’re nearly there!’ Esme could hardly contain her excitement.
The discomfort in her ears told her they were descending, the pressure in the cabin changing and the sound of the engines changing from the dull, low level hum to a higher pitched whine.
She became aware that Eric was watching her and smiling.
She smiled back and asked, ‘What? What is it?’
‘I can’t believe you’re here with me...’
She rolled her eyes and smiled at him again.
‘God Eric..,’ she chastised him, turning her head away from him smiling, embarrassed but flattered by his attention.
She never liked landing and when the fasten seatbelts warning light came on and the air steward checked they were all seated and strapped in, Rachel gripped the arm rest and closed her eyes again.
‘Are you OK Rachel?’
She answered him without opening her eyes, ‘I’m not the greatest of flyers.’
Eric held her hand, running his fingers up and down her ring finger. She opened her eyes slightly to watch him. His face was contemplative, thoughtful.
The plane jumped slightly and she pulled her hand from his and curled her arms around herself.
‘Don’t worry Rachel. We’re nearly there. I can see the cars on the road.’
The plane jolted hard as they landed and the engines screamed as reverse thrust was engaged.
It was all over and passengers were clicking off their seatbelts and retrieving luggage from the overhead compartments.
Rachel opened her eyes to see an amused Esme watching her.
‘I’m a real wimp when it comes to flying Esme, sorry. When I was your age I used to love it.’
Esme jumped into her arms, flinging her arms round her and kissed her on the cheek.
‘Wow. That was special. What was that for?’
‘I’m just so happy we’re here and you’re here.’
Rachel hugged her back before Eric picked her off Rachel and lifted her to the aisle.
‘Come on Esme. We don’t want to be the last off the plane.’
Rachel stood and stretched. She was excited to be here. Thrilled to be here with Esme and Eric. Eric wrapped his arms round her from behind and held her tight for a moment before collecting their luggage. His touch and warmth told her more than any words.
After an impatient wait to get through passport control and collect the rest of their luggage, Eric took them to the airport exit. It was a beautiful day, the sun bright, hardly a cloud in the sky.
‘Weather’s meant to be great for today....but there’s a storm heading our way. We’ll enjoy it while we can.’
A large 4x4 Lexus was parked in a pull-in and as they approached an elderly uniformed man jumped out to greet them.
‘It’s been a long time Mr Harkett. Too long.’
Eric shook the man’s hand smiling. With every step of this journey, Rachel could see Eric’s troubles fall from his shoulders. The elderly man helped load their luggage.
‘Jump in Mr. Fredericks. We’ll give you a lift back to the house.’
‘No Sir. No. I have some business to attend to in Halifax. I’ll make my own way back. But thank you anyway.’
Eric nodded and as he turned away he added, ‘Your parents are delighted you’re back Sir’
Rachel noticed a momentary pause in his step before he lifted Esme into her seat and closed the door.