by Lynn James
Damn , Elaine was impressed. “To think I thought I was doing good to make captain.”
Elaine hadn’t realized that she had spoken the words out loud until Devon squeezed her hand. “I am very impressed that you’re a captain. I’ve worked hard to get where I am, but the fact remains that you have far more responsibilities than I do. Not to mention the fact that you are also a woman in a male-dominated field.”
She looked into the steel gray eyes and saw the sincerity of Devon’s words. “True.”
“I study plants, water and soil. I’m not saying that I don’t do anything else, or that what I do isn’t important, but I don’t have nearly as many fields of discipline or training. I don’t have to be a firefighter, a police officer or lead a search and rescue team. And let’s not forget,” Devon added with a wink, “your duties of scaring unsuspecting botanists off of rocks so you can rescue them.”
She felt her face flush, partly from her embarrassment, but more from the heat of Devon’s hand on hers. How can a wink and a smile cause me to feel this way? “So what made you decide to become a botanist, anyway?”
“My mom used to have plants all over the house when we were kids. I used to spend hours with her watering them and talking to them. Every single one of them had a name.” Devon’s nostalgic smile abruptly faded.
The change in her expression concerned Elaine. “Hey, are you okay?”
“I’m sorry. I hang on to those good memories, but still the reality saddens me.”
She waited patiently for Devon to continue.
“I lost my parents while I was in college. That’s part of the reason my sister and I are so close. We’ve always been there for each other and why it is so important that I finish this assignment so I can be home with her when my nephew is born.”
“I’m so sorry,” she spoke softly as she gave Devon’s hand an affectionate squeeze. “If you don’t mind my asking, how did it happen?”
“There was a robbery at our house. I guess they thought nobody was home, or maybe they didn’t care. Either way, my parents were found in the living room by the police after the neighbor reported gunshots. By the time the paramedics got there, it was too late. I thank God that Raine was out with friends or I would have lost her too. It was hard and I hope that they know the things they taught me as a child made such an impact on me that I chose to do what I do. I’m sorry.” Devon paused. “I didn’t mean to put a damper on the conversation.”
“Not at all.” Trying to put Devon at ease, she asked, “What else made you want to be a botanist?”
“My parents used to take us camping every summer. We didn’t go to campgrounds or anything like that. We would hike into some remote area and the only things we were allowed to take were the things we could pack in and pack out. I loved it.” Devon looked Elaine directly in the eye and smiled. “It’s kind of funny. I’m all about the land and nature and my sister, well; she’s a city girl through and through.”
Elaine was glad to see Devon’s expression clear as she mentioned her sister. There was obviously plenty of affection there.
“Anyway, as the summers passed, more and more people ventured further and further into the woods. I guess I was about eleven when I figured out how disgusted I was by the litter and the disregard people had for nature. We found old tires, refrigerators, oil drums and so many other things that had no reason for being there, other than the callousness of the people who left them there. It was then that I decided that I had to do something to protect the area that I loved so much.”
Elaine nodded in agreement. She completely understood where Devon was coming from. She couldn’t believe how relaxed she felt talking with Devon. Devon was real and they seemed to share so many of the same thoughts and feelings. She couldn’t remember a time that she had shared such an unforced and truly pleasant conversation. It certainly never happened with Grace. Even in the beginning, she and Grace never had much to talk about. Not to mention, Grace didn’t have much of a sense of humor, unlike Devon, who seemed not only to love laughing, but made Elaine laugh as well. She and Grace had their passions, but very few in common and Grace had lied about some of hers. It wasn’t all bad; it just was what it was.
She was dying to ask Devon more about her home life, precisely if she had someone special at home or if she was single, but instead decided to focus on trying to act like a ranger, not a lust-driven lesbian. After all, she was a professional, right?
“So where do you call home when you’re not here in a ranger’s cabin?” Devon asked.
“Well, I live in Sandpark Point, but sometimes I feel like I live at the station.”
“How funny, I live in Barrington. I go to Marblerock all the time to shop. I’m surprised we’ve never met before now or at least seen each other.”
A moment of silence passed before Elaine glanced up at Devon again and suddenly the site of wet, perfectly tanned skin glistening in the sun flashed before her eyes. Yep, way to be a professional, El. Trying to ignore the rise in her body temperature, she stumbled for the first time during their conversation, searching for words. She had been curious about something ever since she had seen Devon swimming in the pool. “So, is there a story behind the tattoo I noticed on your shoulder or is it just a youthful indiscretion?”
“ That goes back to college. A few months after my parents died I decided to get it as a reminder. It’s a phoenix rising from the ashes. It was a moment of clarity and commitment and a constant reminder that I can survive anything.”
Devon paused as though lost in thought before asking, “So what about you? What made you decide to become a ranger?”
Elaine smiled as she realized how similar her story was to Devon’s. “My parents used to send me to summer camp. I hated it there because I never seemed to fit in. It was hard to go to camp and bunk with a bunch of girls knowing that I was different. I wanted to be with the girls, but I didn’t want to be with the girls talking about boys.”
She shrugged before continuing. “So I would take long walks in the woods. That’s how I met my first girlfriend and figured out exactly why and how I was different.”
Devon laughed. “Ah, so it was a woman who got you into forestry?”
“Not really, she just happened to be there. We did use the woods as a haven to learn things the camp counselors didn’t teach,” she said with a flirtatious wink. “But it was in those same woods that she eventually broke up with me.”
Devon gave a sympathetic nod.
“Anyway, one summer I was out hiking and I found an injured bird tangled up in the woods. It had tried to use the plastic ring from a six-pack to make its nest. The poor thing had been struggling so hard to get out that it broke its wing. I took it back to the bunkhouse and kept it in a box. The other girls thought I was a freak for touching the bird and mocked me relentlessly, but I just couldn’t stand to see it hurt. I was afraid that if I didn’t help the poor thing, it would die.”
“They’re the freaks. How can anyone let an innocent creature suffer?”
Elaine could feel Devon’s empathy and it didn’t help her promise to remain professional. “After I found the bird, I started reading a lot about the animals indigenous to the area and their natural environment. As I looked around, I realized what we were doing to the earth. Our counselors would just find a tree, bury their ax in it and never give it a second thought. They never even considered the dangers of campfires on hot, dry summer nights. So I continued to read and began resenting the people who were supposed to be teaching me.” Elaine smiled playfully. “I guess that’s when I became a rebellious protester. And quit going to summer camp too.”
“So what happened with the bird?”
“I made a splint using a Popsicle stick for its injured wing. It seemed like in no time at all, it was ready to return to its home. So I took it back into the woods and let it go.”
“And you’ve been taking care of animals ever since.”
Elaine nodded. “I try. Then something stupid like this fu
cking train wreck happens, not to mention these damn poachers and I wonder if I’m doing any good at all.”
“Of course you are. You obviously take your work seriously. We both do. The reason we both get so pissed off is because we both care so much.”
Elaine definitely had to agree with that logic.
“May I ask you another question?” Devon felt reluctant, but wanted to know.
“Sure.”
“The entire time we’ve been talking, you haven’t mentioned anything about your family or friends. I guess I’m curious.”
Elaine paused for a long moment, gathering her thoughts. “Well, there’s not much to tell, really. My parents were pretty good when I was growing up. Normal parents as far as parents go, I guess. But that changed when I came out.”
She blew out a long breath. “I was a teenager when I came out and at first my father acted like I was just being defiant and then he just acted like an ostrich… He stuck his head in the sand and pretended like it never happened. If he didn’t acknowledge it, it wasn’t real. As far as my mom goes, she just couldn’t accept who I was and tried relentlessly to turn me into the daughter she wanted rather than the daughter she had.” Her short laugh had no humor in it.
“My mom was always trying to get me to date the neighbor’s son, or trying to set me up on blind dates with young men that her friends knew. She played canasta once a week with her club. Every single week, without fail, it seemed that one of the women had found me the perfect boy, or so they’d say. It was kind of funny. No matter how many times I told her, she just didn’t hear me. But in their eyes, they still had a chance to get it right with my brother, Brody. He’s seven years younger than me. Because of our age difference, it didn’t really affect him at the time. When he was finally old enough to understand, it didn’t matter to him one way or the other. He was always the center of his own universe and became the center of my mom and dad’s as soon as I came out.”
“Where is your family now?”
“My dad retired about four years ago. He was a welder on oil pipelines. I guess they were tired of the Pacific Northwest so they moved to Florida. How cliché, huh?”
“What about your brother? Where is he?”
“Brody went with them to Florida. He’s never been what I would consider motivated. I guess after I came out, they did everything they could to make sure he turned out better than I did, in their eyes, anyway.”
Devon didn’t try to disguise her anger, “That’s bullshit! Elaine, being gay doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with you! It’s your family’s loss.”
Elaine smiled, “Well, it doesn’t seem like my parents did my brother any favors. He has no education and no ambition. He’s thirty-one years old and still lives at home with them. He spends most of his days surfing and works part-time at a beach bar. My parents are proud of him. As far as my parents are concerned, at least he’s not gay and that makes him damn near perfect.”
“Do you see them or talk to them often?”
“No, I haven’t seen them at all since they moved to Florida. We’ve spoken maybe twice since they moved and both times I had to call them. The conversation was strained to say the least. It’s kind of like an unspoken don’t-ask-don’t-tell arrangement.”
“I’m really sorry, Elaine. If I had known, I never would have asked.”
“No, don’t be. I dealt with it a long time ago. That doesn’t mean that it doesn’t still hurt.” Elaine smiled proudly. “Besides, the guys in my crew, they are my family. There isn’t a thing in the world that I wouldn’t do for them and them for me. So, it’s okay.”
“Well nobody should have to deal with their own family treating them that way. You deserve to be appreciated and accepted for who you are.”
Their conversation continued, although the subjects weren’t nearly as heavy. Devon continued to question Elaine about her life but most of her questions were now centered on her crew.
“How does your sister feel about your work?” Elaine asked, genuinely curious, but also hoping to hear that there was no girlfriend in Devon’s life.
“Raine is very supportive, as is my best friend Stacey.” She leaned across Elaine to retrieve her laptop. “I have some pictures here. Raine is about seven and a half months pregnant in this picture. It’s one of my favorites. She wears the glow of motherhood beautifully.”
Elaine recovered from the almost-electrical shock she’d felt as Devon leaned over her and smiled at the affection reflected in Devon’s face and voice as she talked about her sister.
“Throughout her pregnancy I think we’ve become even closer, if that’s possible.”
“I’m kind of surprised that you are out here when her delivery date is so close.”
“Raine is very stubborn. She knows I love my career and told me that if I didn’t come out here, she would refuse to let me in the delivery room.” Devon’s smile grew. “Besides she’s in very capable hands. If there is any change in her condition or if she goes into labor, I will be notified immediately.”
As she scrolled through the pictures on her laptop describing Raine in various stages of pregnancy, she eventually came to one of Stacey. “This would be the woman to whom my sister’s wellbeing is entrusted. She is my best friend Stacey and more like a sister than anything else.” Devon laughed. “If you ask Raine she’s more like a mother hen. Phillip, Raine’s husband, is overseas. He’s in the army and although he didn’t want to be there when his wife was delivering their son, he didn’t have much of a choice. Stacey has already stepped into her role of godmother even though the little guy hasn’t arrived yet.”
“I think that’s great. Um, I should go check the generator and get some more wood,” Elaine said abruptly. A crack from the fire was the perfect excuse to get some air. Leaning in to look at photos, the scent of Devon’s hair had become too much. Nor should she be so relieved to learn that the object of her desire didn’t appear to have someone waiting at home.
She hoped it didn’t look like she was running away, but she didn’t dare look back at Devon. Fresh air. She needed it badly.
Chapter 9
She blew on her hands as she checked the fuel gauge on the generator. If they got seriously snowed in, she’d be glad of the emergency propane bottles. She had left the cabin so hastily that she had failed to grab her gloves and certainly didn’t want to go back inside the cabin to retrieve them.
“Don’t be stupid,” she mumbled to herself. “So what if she kissed you back? Jesus, your girlfriend just moved out.” She laughed bitterly. “Well, your roommate just moved out. You have absolutely no business being interested in that woman. God, what is wrong with you?”
She had just finished locking up the generator and was preparing to load up on firewood when she felt something hit her back. She glanced over her shoulder and realized that she had just been nailed by a snowball. She spun around to see Devon standing not far away. A big smile lit up her face as her laughter echoed through the mountains.
Elaine couldn’t help herself, Devon’s laughter was infectious and seeing her in her mittens and ski cap, she was just too cute. She completely forgot about the fact that she was not here to get involved with a woman. With a deft motion she easily dodged another snowball. Elaine scooped a handful of snow, oblivious to its coldness, quickly packed it into a nice round ball and flung it at Devon, who easily darted aside as she targeted Elaine with another. Elaine immediately felt the wet cold penetrate her clothes as it struck her coat at the top of the zipper, square in the chest.
Devon laughed even harder until Elaine decided that payback was necessary. She attempted to avoid the onslaught of snowballs being hurled at her as she approached Devon. “You are going to pay for that,” Elaine threatened playfully.
As Elaine approached Devon employed a different tactic. “I thought a ranger’s duty was to protect and serve.”
“That’s a police officer’s motto.”
Elaine had a single purpose in mind and when she was close enou
gh, she tackled Devon, burying her in the fluffy wet snow. Devon laughed and half-heartedly tried to push Elaine off her as Elaine scooped up an armful of snow and rubbed it all over Devon.
“Oh my God! That is so cold!” Devon screamed with laughter. She quickly shoved a handful of snow down the back of Elaine’s shirt.
Elaine responded by lifting Devon’s shirt and spreading snow across her bare stomach.
As Devon squirmed against Elaine’s body in an attempt to free herself, Elaine’s hand brushed against her breast. Their eyes locked and Elaine’s expression quickly changed from playful to provocative. In spite of the cold, Elaine could only feel the heat of Devon’s body beneath her, making the numbness of her own body vanish. The darkening of Devon’s eyes mimicked that of their brief passionate moment in the woods.
Devon’s eyes were captured by a dark obsidian gaze. She realized that Elaine’s eyes were brilliant and intense not tainted by gold or brown. They were amazingly dark and turned nearly black with her desire. They were alluring, passionate and drawing Devon closer. She was as helpless to look away from those eyes as she was to stop herself from pulling Elaine’s head down for a hungry kiss.
When she felt Elaine’s hand move across her abdomen and toward her breast, the kiss deepened. She moaned as Elaine’s lips left hers only to return more firmly. Elaine’s tongue licked at her lips seeking entry and Devon opened to her. She moaned again as Elaine’s tongue slipped into her mouth taking possession.
Elaine was intrigued by the fresh mint that pervaded Devon’s mouth. It was the same clean crisp taste that had lingered on Devon’s lips before. It was that wonderful flavor that was now filling her mouth as Devon’s tongue continued to dance with her own.
Elaine had no idea how long they lay kissing; she only knew that it hadn’t been long enough. When they finally parted she realized it had begun to snow again. Her fingers had warmed as they traveled over Devon’s body. She had to stop herself before her hands began stripping the clothes that prevented her from feeling Devon’s naked breast and she lost total control.