Straight from the Heart

by Breigh Forstner

  He looked up at me with a grin that I couldn’t describe. “You feel so warm, Bryn, I could get used to doing this all the time, hun, so wet and so tight. Damn I’m a lucky man right now.” Finally withdrawing his soaked fingers, I was starting to catch my breath. “Has anyone honestly told you how beautiful you are?”

  I smiled at him. “Are you just saying that because you made me scream?”

  Damon laughed, reaching over me to grab a towel to clean me up with. “Yes and you are seriously the hottest girl I have ever met Bryn. You’ve got something about you. I don’t know what it is…” He lost his words and tried to cover his head from laughing so hard. “I can’t even talk around you. Maybe it’s the fact you’re laying naked next to me, and I wish I could do so much more with you…to you. I would absolutely want nothing more than to be the first one to give you a whole other world of pleasure, show you things that would make you feel like a different person. BUT I’m not going to rush you Bryn. Everyone wants their first time to be amazing, and you deserve nothing less.”

  This man sure had a way with his words. We found our clothes and put them back on before any of his bandmates discovered us.

  “Thank you.” I told him, wrapping my arms around his waist in a hug. My head rested on his chest as he rubbed up and down my back. “Promise we’ll do that soon. I’m already going to miss you.”

  He kissed my hair as I stumbled trying to get my shoes on. “Oh believe me, I’m climbing into the shower and taking a cold one at that. You…ahh never mind. I’m going to get this place cleaned up before Pauly kicks my ass.”

  I chuckled. “Pauly kick your ass? Nooo, he wouldn’t do that.”

  “Yes he would since he’s always trying to get Luce into bed with him. He’s crazy about her.”

  I remembered what Lucy said at the club about being in love with him. “Then why don’t they just screw each other already?”

  Damon sighed “Goes back to a few months ago. She’s still trying to get over the big fight.”

  “Between Cale and the old drummer?”

  “Exactly. Lucy’s not perfect, but she was the center of a love triangle that no one could stop. She and Cale dated for a long time. Almost 2 ½ years. But then…” Before Damon could finish talking, I heard a bunch of yelling and loud voices filling up the bus. “Saved by the bell,” he whispered in my ear, and kissed me quickly on the lips. I saw Lucy stumble in, with Pauly and the rest of the group behind them, along with a few bimbos I vaguely recognized from the club.

  “My cue to go. Even though I’m kind of scared of some random girl sleeping in my bed,” I admitted. It hadn’t happened yet, but I was dealing with guys. It was bound to happen at some point. I’d just sleep on the couch up front by Hal. Or else he’d kick the bitches out.

  “Alright. Sleep good love. You’ve got my number if you need me to rescue you,” he said, squeezing my hand and I blew him a kiss. I waved at the guys before saying bye to Lucy and finding my way to Everlasting’s bus which was less than a block away.

  I sent Gina and Bethany a few quick texts, telling them about tonight and my almost losing my virginity to a rock star. I took a deep breath and glanced around at the craziness of Downtown St. Louis and thought to myself “I can’t wait to see my best friends.”

  Chapter 10: I Hate Everything about You

  I was right.

  Abso-fuckinglutely right about everything.

  The moment I stepped onto the bus, I heard girls squealing, causing me to stick a finger in my throat. It was disgusting. For a second, I felt like the good old rich girl Bryn, who turned her nose up at the girls who went to school with me, but slept their way to get free tuition. I had to get past that mindset though. This was only the first night of I was sure many more to come where I’d have to put up with this.

  I went back to the bunks, tuning out the ugly sound, when I saw that sure enough there was not one person in my bunk, but two.

  Cale. It looked like he was sucking face with the same girl he was messing around with in the bar. I was fuming by that point. Part of me felt like he was doing his on purpose just to piss me off and make me jealous for whatever reason. Like "Hey Bryn, you didn’t want me, I’ll find someone who does". Fuck him.

  I took my spot on the couch where I played my iPod full volume so I couldn’t hear a thing going on behind me. I changed into an oversized t-shirt that was lying next to me and fell asleep.

  Sometime in the middle of the night I awoke to the bus door slamming shut. I sat straight up and looked around. I wasn’t sure if it was a person trying to sneak onto the bus or if it was the girls leaving. I got comfortable again and tried to shut my eyes, only to have the guy I was cussing out in my head sit down by me.

  “Leave me alone,” I grumbled, not bothering to open my eyes again. “I’m trying to sleep.”

  “I know. I’m sorry I was so drunk I didn’t realize I was in your…”

  “In my damn bed with a fucking girl, Cale. I’m a little grossed out. I’m washing those sheets whenever we get to a Laundromat,” I snapped, sticking my hand out from beside my face to swat him away. All I wanted was to sleep and get some rest. We had another off day, but the tour was heading out west towards California.

  I heard him mumble something under his breath, touching a hand to the side of my stomach. I made another attempt to slap him away, but he moved before I could strike his skin. “Bryn Schaefler, you are a crabby person in the morning.”

  Leaning up on my elbow I glared daggers at him. No apology, just a comment on how I’m crabby? “You could at least say you were sorry.”

  Cale tipped his head back and cackled. “Alright, alright.” He moved to the floor where he sat on his knees his hands were together in front of me like he was getting ready to beg. “Bryn, I don’t know your middle name, Schaefler, I am so very sorry for taking another girl into your bed.” He stuck out his bottom lip and gave me the puppy dog eyes. “I was not thinking clearly and I regret every little last second of last night. Will you please forgive me?”

  Even when Cale pissed me off to no end, he would say something to redeem himself. I glanced over his messed up brown hair which was covering his face, but I could see his amber colored eyes looking into mine and not anywhere else.

  I couldn’t ever say no to this guy if I tried. I let out a huff and groaned “Yes, Cale Pelton, I forgive you. I’m still sleeping out here because you were doing the deed in my bed.” He stood back up and adjusted his plaid pajama pants so they sat right at his waist. Before he walked away I yelled for him. “Cale?”

  He spun around to stare at me. “Yeah?”

  “My middle names Michelle.”

  His mouth curled into a smile. “Hmm…Bryn Michelle Schaefler huh?”

  Was I going to regret telling him that? “Jeez, last time I was called my full name was by my mother.”

  “Don’t worry. I’ll stick with B.” Cale winked and headed back towards the bunks.

  I managed to go back to sleep for what felt like a couple of hours. My mind drifted to Damon. I wasn’t sure of my feelings for him yet, but he knew how to make me feel good and show me a good time. That would be enough for now. But did I know that much about him? He’s never told me about his family, except from what Lucy mentioned, or anything about what he likes to do off tour.

  To be honest, I knew nothing.

  When next I woke, I glanced at the time on my phone and it said past noon. Holy shit I slept that long? I thought to myself, stretching my arms over my head. I heard a fake cough and immediately pulled the oversized shirt down.

  “Sleep well?” Cale asked, playing the X-box with the Vince, Raptor and Luke. They smiled and told me good morning.

  “I slept through that?” I replied, pointing to the TV where they were playing one of the old Tony Hawk skater games.

  “Heck yea little sis, we’ve been at it for a while. Whoever loses this skate off is buying us a dinner at the place of our choice in Cali,” Vince joked.

  I got up
from the couch, trying not to reveal too much skin as I hurried up to change into something halfway decent. Even though we weren’t playing tonight, I hoped we were going to stop somewhere and at least get some fresh air. I couldn’t find anything clean in my bag besides a pair of Silver jeans, so I buttoned them up over my waist. As I was searching for a shirt to wear, I felt a mouth linger against my neck.

  “Can I just say you looked hotter than words in that shirt?” Cale breathed against my neck. I stood up straight, stiffening up, trying not to feel so turned on by the fact that he was literally breathing on me and could kiss me at any point. I felt dirty and wrong because not even 24 hours before that I was kissing on the lead singer of another band. “My shirt too. I need to have more of them lying around. Shit, you had me hard as a rock, B.” It never got old hearing him call me B. I tried to spin to face him, but he positioned his hands so one fastened around my waist, and the other around my chest. I instantly regretted not wearing a bra to sleep or putting one on before that point because my nipples hardened when I felt his fingertips ready to attack me.

  “You’re so wrong, you know that?” I whispered, not wanting anyone to hear me. He held me still, swaying me back and forth, arms sturdy and not moving for anything.

  “Oh I’m so wrong that when I fucked that girl last night I pictured your black hair and green eyes in my head? The entire time. I gave into temptation, B. I wanted you so bad, but I know I can’t have you, so I jumped onto the next girl that blinked in my direction,” Cale whispered, the fingers that were around my waist trailed down to the waistline of my jeans, slipping inside. “This kills me. I’m trying to change. After my last relationship I won’t lie, I had sex with a different girl every night, Bryn. I don’t want to go back to that habit.” His fingers dipped even lower, past the silky underwear I had just put on, and down near my core.

  I moaned. The way Cale was so gentle with his hands, it wasn’t like Damon. Shit. Damon. I shouldn’t let Cale do this to me. I couldn't. He was my "brother," but my insides were spinning round and round, not giving me a chance to stop him. “Please don’t.”

  Me telling him no must’ve fueled him further. “I know, I know.” One finger slipped abruptly inside of me, plunging in as deep as possible. He removed his arm from my chest and grabbed my hair. Now I wasn’t standing up so straight. I felt like I could crumble, my knees already giving out on me. “This is just me telling you what you’re missing out on. That finger inside of you right now. I can feel your juices coming at me already, Bryn. You like it and you know it.”

  And I sure did. I unbuttoned my top button and slid my pants down a little, giving him easier access. Once I did, he put yet another finger in, continuing his assault. “I can’t take it Cale, please stop,” I begged. My mouth slid out the words as I gripped the stairs to my bunk to hold myself up. Cale took his fingers out, spinning me around to face him. His face looked devious, like he was enjoying every moment of my bare chest pressed up to his.

  “If only it was just us,” Cale began. He had me right where he wanted me. Grabbing one of my breasts into his hand, he fondled it slowly but carefully, his eyes never leaving mine. “I’ve dreamt about this right here. Feeling how you soft you are in my hand. You are so unbelievably fucking perfect.”

  “Cale, it's your turn!” Raptor shouted from the front. We both stepped away from each other, laughing our asses off.

  “I should get dressed,” I let out, finding my bra that was hidden, and Cale reached for another one of his t-shirts.

  “Here, this shouldn’t be so big on you.” He handed the shirt to me and I pulled it over my head. “I’ll always be here for you, Bryn. Whenever Charming decides to go back to his old ways, I’ll be right there waiting,” Cale whispered, kissing me square on the lips, leading the way back towards the guys.

  What the Hell just happened?

  Hal pulled the bus into Omaha after stopping to get us something to eat. I texted Damon to wish him a ‘Good afternoon’ and tell him that I couldn’t wait to see him that night. I promised myself I wouldn’t let Cale get in the way. Despite my feelings toward him, I needed to make an effort with Damon and get to know him.

  We decided to stay at a hotel where the other bands were staying. I was just thankful that there was a Laundromat a block from the hotel so I could get the skanky sheets off of my bed and have some clean clothes again. I met up with Lucy and we did our laundry together. It was nice to have another girl on the tour, have normal "girl" conversations.

  “How bad was it last night?” I asked Lucy, as she put her last load of laundry into the coin operated washer.

  She ran a hand through her blank and now pink hair, frowning. “Interesting. I thought I was going to kick some asses. Some girl tried to climb into Pauly’s bed and when he told her to get lost she started to flirt with Damon.”

  My skin felt numb. Shake it off Bryn, it’s going to happen and you knew it. “He didn’t kiss her or anything, right?”

  Lucy shook her head. “Don’t think so. I can’t speak for him, hun. How were your guys?”

  “Drunk as hell. Cale was fucking a girl in my bed of all places.”

  Lucy looked at me surprised. “Seriously? That dick head. I’ll break his goddamn neck. Of all places…is he trying to make you jealous?”

  “Pretty sure of it,” I admitted. “He said he was just drunk and couldn’t remember where his bed was.”

  “Ohhh that excuse,” Lucy chuckled. “Some people never change.”

  “Like who?” Voices interrupted our conversation. Cale and Damon walked in with smug looks on their faces.

  “None of your damn business. Bryn and I were having girl talk, weren’t we?”

  “That’s exactly what we’re doing. You wanted to visit or something?” I asked sarcastically, putting my hands on my hips.

  Damon licked his lips and brought what looked like another basket to the empty washer beside us. “Obviously. But seriously, everyone on the tour wanted to get together for dinner at this place nearby called 7M Grill if you girls were all done with your ‘girl talk,’” he air-quoted, causing Lucy to roll her eyes. Cale stayed put, trying to look everywhere but me.

  “Well, we still have this laundry to get done with, and yeah that sounds fun.” I told them, and Damon draped an arm around me. “And you doing that isn’t helping me!” I giggled. Damon shrugged his shoulders.

  “You’re no fun. Come on bud, we’ll leave this shit for the people that work here to do it. That’s what they’re here for right?” Damon high-fived Cale and I glared at Damon for being so rude towards the employees that were in the back of the Laundromat. They had offered to take care of Lucy and I’s clothes , but I insisted I’d do my own. I spent my whole life never having to lift a finger to do laundry or cook and clean, so I was a tad anxious to do something for myself.

  “See you ladies later.” Cale winked and followed behind Damon outside.

  ***

  Dinner was an absolutely amazing. I sat between Vince and Luke, as they were telling me old stories about how they almost didn’t graduate high school. It was pretty humorous to hear Luke of all people would teepee the principal’s car and spray paint it neon orange ‘Go Huskies,’ which was the mascot at Walker High School. They also introduced me to some of the other people on the tour that I hadn't met. On top of the best food I’d tasted in months, they had karaoke night when we were all there.

  I watched Raptor sing ‘Like a Virgin’ by Madonna, laughing my ass off as he ran his hand through his spiky Mohawk. He even crawled on the ground to portray Madonna. Lucy convinced me to get up and sing a song so we did ‘Misery Business’ by Paramore. I let loose, shaking from side to side, both of us treating it more like a regular performance. I caught Cale’s eye once and his eyes were raking my body up and down as we jumped up and down like Hayley Williams. Damon was on his cell phone not paying any attention to us, but at that point I couldn't have cared less.

  Mic still in hand, I yelled down to Cale, who was
slumped down in his chair looking pretty wasted. "Cale Pelton, you get your ass up here and sing!” Lucy got off the stage and dragged him by the arm up to where we stood and he gave us both a bad look.

  Lucy whispered something in his ear, I’m assuming to tell him to snap out of his drunken funk, and he snatched the other microphone from her. He bent down to study our song choices, telling the DJ which one he wanted.

  “You better stay up here and sing with me. You’ll like this one.” Cale smiled flirtatiously. I smiled back weakly. Now as I surveyed our tour crew, Damon was nowhere to be found. I was still going to have fun anyways. ‘Whole Lotta Love’ by Led Zeppelin came on.

  I pursed my lips at him. He didn’t know that I loved classic rock above everything else. It was time to show Cale what I had.

  He opened his mouth to sing the opening verse, but I sang first. I got right in his face as I finished the first verse. His expression softened, getting into the song as the chorus approached and I let him take the reins. Cale got in my face with equal amount of force, pressing his forehead to me with every scream he let out.

  By the time we were all done with the song, everyone was up screaming, wanting an encore. Shaking my head no, I set the microphone down, sitting back by the guys to have water. While I sat talking to the guys who were telling me good job, Cale’s cell phone started ringing. He stood up to answer it, and I strained to listen.

  “Wow, that’s amazing sir. Yeah, yeah that’s not a problem. That sounds great, thank you so much. I’ll let the group know. Okay, you have a goodnight too,” he said before hanging up. I tried to pull him aside to see what the good news, but from the prized look on his face, I had a feeling I knew.

  “What happened?” I asked him. Cale didn’t answer me at first, gesturing for Vince, Luke and Raptor to come over to where we were.

  “Was that the call?” Luke questioned.