by KB Winters
Finn laughed again. “Where’s the fun in that?”
I rolled my eyes but a smile crossed my lips. I couldn’t help it. Apparently, acting as though I had selective amnesia was my heart’s plan for the night.
We pulled in front of a small cafe and I studied the exterior. I couldn’t remember ever seeing it before. The building itself looked like one of the historical homes that had been preserved and turned into a commercial space among the other houses. A little jewel nestled in the center of the neighborhood. Sure enough, the glowing open sign was still on and I wasn’t sure if I was relieved or unnerved.
On the one hand, if they were closed, I could have an easy out and have Finn drop me somewhere where I could wait for an Uber to come pick me up. But there was a part of me that wanted to have a cup of coffee with him. Some sick curiosity that wanted to know if, after all these years, I might finally be able to get some answers from him.
Finn parked in one of the four spots in front of the quaint shop. Apparently, we’d have the place to ourselves. He killed the engine of the bike and I awkwardly climbed off. My dress got tangled and I lurched forward, hearing a heart-wrenching sound—an obvious rip on my expensive dress. “Damn it,” I cursed, struggling to get loose.
“Hold up, Lyss.” Finn stooped and untangled the dress, his head dangerously close to my ass. I sucked in a breath as he worked to free me. He stood in slow motion, but kept his hands to himself. “There,” he said. “Try again.”
I swung my leg over. “Thank you.”
He ducked his chin. “Let’s get you inside so you can defrost.”
The shop was just as cute on the inside as it was on the outside. Surprisingly there were quite a few people inside, all twenty-somethings. It didn’t take long to gather that the coffee shop was a regular haunt for the college kids and that the area was a popular neighborhood for students, sharing the rent six ways on the big sprawling houses that dotted the tree-lined streets.
That explained the late operating hours.
Finn waltzed up to the counter as though he’d been there a dozen times before. The girl at the counter was young and perky looking and didn’t bother hiding her eye-fucking glance as he consulted the menu above her head. A swell of jealously bloomed in the pit of my stomach and I nearly scoffed at myself a moment later. As if I had a right to who looked at him and how. Hell, for all I knew, he’d slept with a hundred women since we’d broken up.
Which was perfectly fine.
Okay, it was mostly fine.
“What sounds good, Lyss?” Finn asked, turning back to face me, casually propping one elbow on the counter.
“Oh, um, regular coffee is fine. Do you have soy milk?”
The girl nodded. “Of course.”
“Great.”
Finn smiled at me. “What happened to extra chocolate, chocolate mocha girl?”
I smiled. “She lost her teenage metabolism.”
Finn arched a brow and gave me a mischievous smile. He also gave me a slow once-over that left me tingling and breathless. And he hadn’t even touched me.
Shit.
He didn’t comment but my cheeks warmed as if he’d whispered something deliciously dirty in my ear. He paid for the two drinks, ignoring my protests, and then led the way to a secluded table in the corner. The chairs were upholstered and supremely comfortable, with a small, low-profile coffee table wedged between them. Finn ushered me into one of them and then went back to the counter as the girl with the bedroom eyes called out his name and held up the two white ceramic mugs.
“Thank you,” I said when he pressed mine into my ungloved hands. The warmth from the hot coffee seeped through my skin and I purred with content.
Finn shifted in his seat and took a sip of his own drink. “How long were you planning to keep walking out there?”
I shrugged and lowered my mug to my lap, still keeping my hands glued to the exterior to gather as much warmth as I could. “It had only been ten minutes. I was clearing my head…”
Finn leaned back in his chair. “What happened?”
I frowned. “Is that really any of your business?”
He hitched one shoulder with an infuriating casual ease. “No. Just curious.”
“Let’s talk about something else.”
“Fair enough.” He took another drink and then set his cup down. “What are you up to these days? Tell me what life looks like for Alyssa Archer.”
Good, that was much safer territory. “Almost three years ago, I started my own business.”
“Oh yeah? What kind?”
“Well, I’ve always been passionate about pet adoptions—” I broke off and rolled my eyes at myself. “Obviously, you already know that. God…this is awkward.”
Finn chuckled. “Just keep going. Tell me more.”
I sighed. “I started a website that helps shelters post profiles of all the animals they have ready for adoption and then there is a search engine built in for people looking to adopt a pet. I didn’t build the website, but I worked with a developer and we made a website and an app. It’s the most user-friendly interface on the market right now and we actually have an investment company interested in buying the technology to use for a dating website of all things.”
Finn smiled at that. “Matching homeless pooches and helping lonely singles find true love. So, essentially, you’ve been St. Alyssa.”
I laughed. “It has a ring to it.”
“All jokes aside, that sounds really cool. I’d love to see it some time.”
“Well, it’s called Hearts & Paws. Google is your best friend.”
“Always.”
“What about you? Obviously, you’re working as a mechanic, but are you still in the army? Kicking ass and taking names on the side?”
“Part-time ass kicking these days.” Finn nodded. “I’ve been in the reserves for the last eighteen months. Miles was one of the guys in my unit. He got out and started the Open Road Garage and hired me on to help him get going. It’s been booming ever since so I’m there full time and then do my one weekend a month with the army.”
“Good for you.”
We were encroaching on dangerous territory. Talking about the army might lead to talking about his deployments which was a hop, skip, and a jump away from talking about us.
“How’re your folks?” he asked.
I shook my head. “Finn…”
He dropped his eyes to the contents of his mug.
I sighed. “I’m sorry. I don’t mean to be bitchy, I just don’t really know how to do this.”
A small smile traced over Finn’s lips and he met my eyes. “You think I do? Hell, you damn near had me jumping out of my skin back there when you dropped that champagne flute.”
“Believe me, I wasn’t expecting to see you either.”
“Hence the shattered glass,” he teased softly.
I snorted. “I’m just glad Rafe wasn’t there to see that…” My eyes went wide and flew back to Finn’s. “I shouldn’t have said that. Rafe’s—he’s a good guy.”
Finn nodded but looked completely unconvinced. “He seems very focused.”
“What is that supposed to mean?”
Finn gave another casual shrug. “Guys like him are all the same, Lyss. They live in power suits and have enough money to get whatever the hell they want. No one tells them no and they get used to getting their way and in my experience, even if they started off as a good guy—it doesn’t take too long before they turn into a raging asshole. And, if you don’t mind me saying, it seems yours has already crossed that line. Good guys don’t leave their girlfriends out in the freezing cold to walk to a bus station or to flag down a cab.”
I narrowed my eyes at him. “I do mind you saying.”
Finn didn’t flinch. Instead, he took a lingering sip of his coffee.
“Rafe didn’t kick me out of the car. I demanded he pull over. And he argued with me the whole time but eventually he drove off.”
Finn scoffed and shook his head i
n disbelief. “Oh, you’re right, that changes everything. Sounds like a real winner.”
I leaned forward and slammed my coffee mug on the table between us. A splash sailed over the rim but I hardly noticed as my eyes zeroed in on Finn. “What would you know about being a winner, Finn? You don’t think this might be toeing the pot-calling-the-kettle-black line? You string me along for three years, then drop me like a hot potato days before you ship off to war. And even when you got back, you never tried to get in touch or make things right. Now, here you are, crawling right out of the woodwork and lecturing me about my relationship? How dare you!”
I expected anger, but Finn’s expression remained neutral. Maybe even a little remorseful. “Lyss, I shouldn’t have said anything. You were right the first time, it’s none of my business. But regardless of what you think, I do care, and I don’t want to see you get hurt.”
I shook my head. “It doesn’t matter, Finn. Our lives have nothing to do with each other. Not anymore. In fact, they haven’t for a long time. Hell, before tonight, I don’t even know the last time I even thought about you.”
Lies. All lies. But it sounded better than the truth that mere minutes before my mind had drifted back to memories of us and wanderings of what could have been.
“Fair enough.” He held up his hands, palms facing me. “You deserve to be happy. That’s all I’m saying.”
My eyes burned as I looked at him. What was he doing? Was this some kind of game? A test? None of it made sense. Before I could decide whether or not I wanted to dig in deeper, my phone vibrated against my leg from where it sat tucked inside my long coat’s pocket. The only people calling me at this time of night would be my employees at the shelter. Was there some kind of emergency? Panic rose in my chest as I scrambled to retrieve the phone, nearly forgetting that Finn was there at all.
When I finally freed the phone from my pocket, my heart skipped a few beats and then froze, like a car engine dying. It was Rafe. Guilt washed over me as my eyes flashed up to look at Finn. “I have to get this.”
He nodded and I flipped open the case on my phone and slid my finger across the screen. “Hello?”
“Alyssa, where are you?” Rafe actually sounded worried. Panic-stricken even.
I read the logo on my coffee mug. “I’m at Crumb Cake.”
“Crumb Cake?”
Finn shifted in his seat and I forced my eyes away from him. “It’s a cafe,” I told Rafe.
“Okay, let me plug it into the GPS. I’ll be right there.”
I squeezed my eyes shut and sighed. “I don’t need you to get me. I was just about to call an Uber.”
“Alyssa, please, let me come and get you. I got halfway home and realized what an asshole I was. Let me make it up to you?”
My lashes fluttered open and I found Finn’s grey eyes locked on mine. Something dark and tempting flickered behind them, glowing like a wolf in the forest peeking between the trees, watching intently, ready to pounce.
All at once, it became clear—I needed to get home.
Chapter Seven
Finn
“Guess this is goodbye,” Alyssa said as she handed me back my coat.
I took it from her with a solemn nod. “Guess so. Your boyfriend probably wouldn’t appreciate you waiting with me out by the curb, huh?”
A smile played at her tempting lips and she shook her head. “Probably not. But listen, thank you, Finn. I appreciate you picking me up and for the coffee, too.” She glanced down to where our empty mugs were resting together beside my leather gloves.
“Anytime.”
Alyssa held my eyes for another moment and then ducked her chin. “Take care of yourself, Finn.”
“You too, Lyss.”
She hurried for the door of the small coffee shop. “Will I see you on the twenty-ninth?” I called after her.
She froze in place, her back still toward me, and I could picture the look on her face. She’d forgotten about the appointment her boyfriend had made on her behalf. After a second, she glanced over her shoulder, wearing her best smile, the one that anyone would assume was real, but I knew the truth. It wasn’t. “Sure. See you then.”
I smiled and then she was out the front doors, and I watched as she hurried down the sidewalk. Jacket still in hand, I moved toward the window and continued to follow her with my eyes. A silver Bugatti pulled up at the curb and I scoffed out loud. “Of course.”
“Excuse me?” the woman at the table next to the window said, peering up at me.
“Nothing.”
Alyssa got into the passenger seat. Fucking prick couldn’t even be bothered to open the door for her.
“Lyss, what are you doing?” I wondered aloud as the taillights disappeared into the night. My hand balled into a fist and I rested it on the cold window. “I sure hope you know.”
I pushed away and then returned to drop a couple dollars on the table and grabbed my gloves. They were still warm from Alyssa’s hands. As I tossed my jacket on, I caught a whiff of her expensive perfume. Then, half a second later, the underlying smell hit me. Sunshine and lavender…Alyssa. It almost sent me to my knees. It had been so long since I’d smelled her hair, but I’d recognize it anywhere. I chuckled sadly to myself. It was bittersweet, knowing the girl I’d once loved was still there, somewhere under all those layers of fancy clothes, expensive shoes and the trappings of high society.
I wondered if I’d ever be able to somehow reach that part of her. The real Alyssa. And if I did, would I even know what to do?
It had all happened so long ago, but the memories were right there in the back of my mind. I tried to push them out. There was no point in dwelling on it now. God knew I’d done enough of that. Whoever Alyssa was now was who she wanted to be—and she was with who she wanted to be with. I had no right to poke around for the girl who only lived in my memory.
****
The days following the charity dinner passed just like the ones before it. At least on a practical level. I spent the weekend at home, drinking beer and watching TV and then messing around on the Firebird I was working to rebuild in my garage. By Monday I was more than ready to throw myself back into work. Ten hour days at the garage were just what I needed to clear my head. Luckily, Miles didn’t ask me any further questions about Alyssa which made it a lot easier to not obsess over her during my shift.
My luck ran out by Friday when my older sister, Kait, called to remind me of our lunch plans the following day. I wanted to cancel. She knew me too well. As soon as we sat down together, she’d know something was up. But I’d rescheduled on her once before and knew I’d never hear the end of it if I tried it again. So, Saturday afternoon, I found myself waiting outside an Italian bistro, waiting for Kait to strut down the sidewalk like she was taking on the runway. Kait put herself through design school working as a catalog model. I think she’d originally wanted to become some superstar, walking runways in Milan and New York, but it wasn’t in the cards. Eventually, she traded that dream for a new one and became a handbag designer. I couldn’t understand the appeal of her creations, but they sold all over the country in fancy upscale shops and judging by the brand new condo she’d purchased in Atlanta a few months back, she was doing just fine.
Kait came into view and I instantly smiled. Her long auburn hair flowed out behind her, her diva makeup all done up and that bright red lipstick (she argued that whoever said redheads shouldn’t wear red was an asshat) that made her impossible to ignore. She was wearing a pair of dark wash jeans tucked into a pair of high-heeled, over the knee boots with her long, black coat. She drew more than a few glances as she strutted toward me with a wide smile.
She ran the last few steps and flew into my arms. “Baby brother!”
I laughed into her hair. It didn’t matter that we were both in our early thirties. To her, I would always be her baby brother and she used ever available opportunity to remind me of that fact. “Hey, big sis. What kind of trouble you been up to?”
We broke apart and
she batted at her hair to get it out of her face when a gust of wind kicked up.
“Come on, let’s get inside.” I reached for the door and held it open for her and she hurried inside.
As soon as we were seated, she amused me with all her adventures. She’d just returned from a trip to LA where she’d secured a groundbreaking deal with a major department store chain. I was halfway through my bowl of minestrone soup before she slowed down to take a breath—or a bite—and as she grabbed a breadstick from the basket on the table, she smiled at me. “What about you? How’s work? Still killing yourself?”
I groaned. “It was one broken finger, Kait. It’s not like a car crashed on top of me.”
“Still…” She popped a bite of bread into her mouth and gave a catlike smile.
A few months back, I’d got my finger caught between a stack of car batteries and what I pegged as a sprain turned out to be a fracture. It healed quickly and without complications but Kait didn’t let that stop her from reminding me. Funny enough, she’d actually nagged me less back when I was being shot at in the Middle East on a routine basis.
“Work is good.”
She frowned. “That’s all ya got? I just told you all about my stuff and I get two words back?”
“Technically, that was three.”
She scowled and then stuck out her tongue.
I chuckled. “I missed you too, sis.”
“Come on, Finny. Tell me what’s going on. If nothing is happening at work, then what about after hours?” Her smile shifted and I knew what was coming next. “Any special lady friends?”
“Lady friends?” I laughed and reached for my water glass. “You make me sound eighty.”
She rolled her eyes. “What am I supposed to call it?” She leaned in, her eyes quickly scanning the room. “Fuck buddies doesn’t really feel like a term fit for public consumption.”
Her statement only made me laugh harder. Despite her exposure to the racy world of professional modeling—and all the drugs, sex, and rock and roll that came with it—Kait remained a stubborn old soul who didn’t like to swear or drink. I loved her all the more for it. She balanced me out.