by Brill Harper
“So what is going on with this getting married bit? How long was I sleeping, exactly?”
“The hospital thinks we’re married, and I didn’t correct them so I could stay with you. I’ve just been taking things on the fly as we go.”
“On the fly, huh? Something you learned how to do from your ‘perps,’ I bet.”
“Just thinking on my feet.” I pull the chair up. “There’s something else you should know. I’m listed on Kenzie’s birth certificate.”
Hillary just blinks at me.
Shit.
“They brought me the form while you were still in a coma, thinking we were married. I was afraid what would happen to Kenzie if you... didn’t wake up. I shouldn’t have put my name on it without talking to you, but you weren’t answering me. So, I made sure Kenzie was taken care of.”
What happened to my oath of not getting close to anyone? I’m now on the hot seat with Hillary, and the legal father of a newborn.
“I didn’t think you could top the macaroni and cheese dinner, but you really are a hero, aren’t you?”
Breath expels from my lungs in a rush. “I lied. To a lot of people. I’m not sure that makes me a hero.”
Hillary reaches out for my hand. “You took care of my baby when I couldn’t. I don’t think I can ever repay you for making sure she wouldn’t be alone, with nobody fighting for her.”
I knew in my head I was going too far, but in my heart if felt like the right thing to do. And my heart is totally fucked up right now. “Just get better, Hillary. That’s how you can repay me.”
Chapter Six
Hillary
Two months later
TODAY HAS BEEN A GOOD day. I know better than to expect to feel like this very often, but I got six hours of uninterrupted sleep last night plus a nap this afternoon. I kind of feel like a new person. I just finished a feeding, and Mac is rocking Kenzie to sleep. Well, she’s already asleep. He’s just rocking her. She’s a little pink lump on his massive chest, so small in his big man hands. The sound of his heartbeat always soothes her so much. She must know she’s safe. Nothing can hurt her when she’s in his gentle hands.
What’s not safe is my libido. Holy fuckballs. A beefy alpha man with a teeny tiny baby on his chest would put a little spring in any woman’s ovaries. The fact that it’s my teeny tiny baby adds a triple Axel to that spring. “You going to put that baby to bed soon?”
He grunts. “I like her when she’s sleeping.”
“You don’t fool me. You like that baby all the time. So much for being my grouchy neighbor.”
He gets out of the chair with this masculine grace that makes me jealous. Especially since he does it without waking the baby. Something I haven’t mastered yet. “We should take her to the park tomorrow.”
“She’s a little young for the slide.”
“I was thinking more about fresh air. And that maybe you could use some too.”
It’s been a few days since I left the apartment. Two? Three? “Yeah, you know, that might be a good idea.” Since I can’t remember what outside feels like.
He tucks Kenzie into her crib and winces when he straightens.
“What's wrong? You hurt yourself at the gym?”
He rubs his shoulder. “I pushed too hard today. My traps and lats,” he says like that’s something I would understand.
“That means...”
“That means I should get you down to the gym. Then you’d know.”
“Ha. Not happening. Unless that’s your way of insinuating I’m out of shape.” More like he’s just kind of bossy about what he thinks is good for me. Which I allow because it’s nice to be cared for.
Mac gets down two glasses and pours the non-alcoholic wine for us. “I wouldn’t mind if you were stronger just because I want you to be able to defend yourself.”
“You’re just tired of opening all my jars.”
“I’ll always open jars for you.”
We sort of pause there, like our conversation is on DVR. There is this long exchange where the two of us just stare into each other's eyes. In a moment that should have been uncomfortable or strange, instead there is a connection. I don’t want to read too much into what he said, but “always” is a long time, and I’m having a hard time with remembering we’re just friends lately. He’s with us a lot. He takes care of Kenzie like a dad. He even spent the night in my bed last week when she was getting up every twenty minutes. A very platonic night in my bed, but still.
He’s in boyfriend mode except for the part where there is any kind of affection that isn’t platonic.
We still haven’t addressed what we were doing on the couch when I went into labor. It was stricken from the record, I guess. And for a while, it needed to be. But my girl parts are defrosting again after their hiatus, and my hot neighbor fantasies are warming up.
I need to break this weird silence, though. “So, what is a...what did you call it that’s sore? Trats?”
He hands me a glass. “Lats and traps. Turn around.”
I take a sip and turn as he places a large, strong, warm hand on my upper back.
“Here and...” He slides his hand onto my shoulder. “Here.”
My heart sprints from his touch, giving me a good workout after all. My breath grows heavy. “Oh.” I wish this wine had real booze right now. I could use the liquid courage. No drinking until I’m done nursing, though.
“Wow, you're pretty tense, too.” His hand gently kneads my shoulder.
He’s touched me plenty in the last three months. I’m not sure what is different right now. Why his hot breath on my skin causes my nipples to pucker under my shirt. Why, when I let myself go lax against his hard body behind me, I have to hold in the moan.
“You're all knotted up. Your shoulders are stiffer than mine.”
Why don’t you show me how stiff you are?
Down, girl.
I groan when he works out one of those knots with his thick hands. “I think my knots have knots. This isn’t hurting your right hand, is it? You just stopped wearing the brace.”
“Don’t worry about my hand. Just relax.”
I loll my head to one side and release all the tension in my body. Mac’s breathing becomes louder, and his dick presses against my ass but neither of us comment on it. Is he taking as much pleasure from massaging me as I am from his magic hands? “It feels really good, Stryker.” I take a chance and press my ass against his hardening dick.
He doesn’t say a word as he slowly slides one of his hands down my side to the waistband of my shorts and tugs lightly at my nursing top, exposing a patch of skin to his tracing fingers.
We’ve gone too far to call this an innocent massage now. I guess it’s time to do the big girl thing and make a move. A real one.
I reach behind me and rub his erection. “Feels like you’re stiff, too, Stryker. I think you need a rubdown as much as I do.”
Mac
I GROAN AND REST MY chin on her shoulder, inhaling the soft skin of her neck. Fuck, I want her... I want Hillary so badly. I’ve spent countless nights either jacking myself to sleep thinking about her or dreaming of her in ways I felt guilty about in the morning. I want to see her naked little body, put my hands on the breasts that are incredibly generous for her frame, hold her hips as I discover how tight and hot she is...
But this isn’t right. She’s just had a baby and surgery. I have nothing to offer her. I’m still not cleared to go back to work. I still can’t talk about the last call I went on and what happened to Ricky. I still wake up in a cold sweat most nights. I feel like half the man I used to be, and that guy was no prize either. Not good enough for her or Kenzie. “Hillary...”
“Shhhh,” she says, “you don't have to say anything.” She turns so she’s facing me and sets her NA wine on the counter. The pulse in her throat is leaping as she runs her hands from my wrists up to my shoulders and then curls them around the back of my neck. She stands on tiptoe and gently lays her lips on mine. She pulls bac
k and tenderly traces my lower lip with the pad of her thumb.
Fuck if I know what to do with this sweetness. I clutch her arms, my limbs shaky and weak. “I’m not sure this—”
Hillary pulls my head down to rest my forehead against hers with a sigh. Cupping both my cheeks, she softly uses her fingertips to comb through my hair. Stretching up to me again, just a breath away from my lips, she whispers, “I’m sure.” She leans forward just enough to barely touch her lips to mine. Then she whispers again, “I’m very, very sure.” With a smile, she pulls me closer to meet her lips fully. Her mouth slides over mine, lips clinging, sipping.
Her mouth curves in pleasure when I return her kiss. I don’t rush this, though part of me wants to. It’s just a soft, gentle exploration, like we have all the time in the world. I tell myself we’ll stop soon. Take it slow. There’s this feeling inside me that keeps fluttering just out of my grasp, and I know if I try to hold it, it will disappear. I need to just let this sweetness happen.
I part my lips in invitation, not wanting to push. But it’s getting harder. I’m getting harder. Softly, she touches the inside of my mouth, tasting and exploring me, like she’s learning my flavor as she slides her tongue against mine.
Time spins out, and I lose myself in her. My hands are in her hair, her body flush against mine. All that softness and warmth that I don’t deserve, yet I take. And take.
Her hands are under my shirt, stroking my chest and torso, creating little patterns of sparks wherever her fingertips land. I try to reach for her wrists. “Wait.”
“Done waiting.” Her hands are pulling up the hem of my shirt, and any war I might have been fighting is over when I see the sheer delight in her eyes as she uncovers me. Fuck, her desire undoes me. I rip the shirt off and tug her to me, delving back into her luscious lips. It’s not sweet kisses anymore. I’m all-out assaulting her mouth, fucking her with my tongue, bringing as much of her body against me as I can and holding her tightly. Maybe too tightly. Months of stored sexual tension just broke the dam of careful control I’d cultivated, and I can’t give a fuck.
I pick her up, mauling her on the way to her bedroom. Her legs wrap around my waist and she grinds on my cock. Damn, that’s good.
I set her on her feet next to the bed and I try to find thoughts through the haze of lust. “Wait. Are you okay to do this? Is it too soon?”
“Doctor cleared me at my last appointment. I didn’t say anything because, well, we weren’t...we haven’t been...”
“And we are now?”
“We are now for sure.” She bites her lip and looks at the tent in my shorts. “I need you, Mac.”
Rockets burst in my damned ribcage. Want can’t begin to describe what I’m feeling. “Baby, there’s two men warring inside me right now. One wants to make love to you slow and sweet and treat you like a princess.”
“And the other?”
Dare I? Will I scare her off? Maybe that’s best. If she sees the ugly parts, maybe she’ll protect herself.
I wind her hair around my hand and tug, exposing her throat to me. I close my mouth over her skin and nip, then lave it with my tongue. “The other wants to fuck you dirty and raw and treat you like a toy.”
Chapter Seven
Hillary
A RUSH OF MOISTURE dampens my panties. “Okay, yes. Both. Please.”
He looks at me carefully, like he’s not sure I’m really here. “I don’t want to scare you.”
“I kind of want to be scared. Don’t hold back with me, okay? Promise?”
He makes a low sound in the back of his throat. “I’m not sure I can hold back.”
“Then don’t.” I lower to my knees.
“Hillary—”
Using both my hands, I pull his shorts and underwear down slowly, cherishing the reveal of his giant, fat cock. I’ve dreamed about getting this close to it ever since that afternoon two months ago. Hell, probably longer than that. But that was when I got to see if for the first time. That’s when I knew I wanted to see it again.
It springs up, protruding from his body and resting mere inches from my face. A small, clear bead of pre-cum tops its slit. I lick my lips, and the fluid begins to trickle out more. I take his cock in both my hands because one hand won’t be able to fully close around the throbbing girth of him.
I had a little bit of false bravado going on the last few minutes, but it’s been replaced by feelings much stronger. Suddenly, every dirty story, every porno, every naughty desire is flashing in front of my brain. I’m discovering that I have an inner slut, she’s a bit cock-hungry, and I like her. I have a feeling Mac is going to like her too.
“I need to be used as much as I need to use you, Mac.” I stick my tongue out and lick the clear beads running down the underside of its swollen crown. His desire for me is delicious.
“Oh fuck. You don’t have to do this. Oh fuck.”
I circle the tip with my tongue. “I really want to, Mac.”
“Christ, that feels good.” He looks down at me and brushes the hair from my face. There’s so much going on in his gaze.
He’s spent the last three months respecting me, being my friend, my partner. But there’s a primal side he’s been keeping from me. I think if I can get him to let it out, it won’t wreck us like he thinks it will. I think it will make us stronger. I rub his dick on my face. Lovingly. Wantonly. I need it. I crave it.
“Hillary, are you sure?”
“Yep.” I pop just the tip of him in and out of my mouth quickly, like punctuation on my answer. “But Mac...” I remember that day on my couch. How hot he was for me. How much he liked it when I said I wanted him to do everything to me. Show me everything. Make me his plaything. I want him back there, in that headspace. I use his dick like lip balm, running it around my lips and then I lick my lips slowly, making sure he sees my enjoyment of him. “I’ve never done this before. Remember? I need you to teach me. I want to learn everything.”
He moans, clutching my face in one hand. He reaches down and takes my hand and wraps it firmly around his cock. It is hot and thick and hard and velvety smooth. With his hand around mine, he begins to stroke, teaching me a rhythm. “That’s it, baby. Just like that. So good.” After a few minutes, he leans forward and presses the tip of his dick to my lips. “In your mouth,” he demands, his voice deep and husky.
Oh fuck. I like it when he tells me what to do. He slides his fat cock into my mouth, the sensation overwhelming and intoxicating.
“Open your eyes,” he says. This command, made with authority, makes me shiver. “Look at me. Look into my eyes.”
The air shifts around us like we’re traveling someplace we can only go together. “That’s it. Keep looking at me. I want all your attention. You watch who’s fucking your mouth.”
I’m in some kind of trance. A cock trance, I guess. I never thought I would feel this connected. The eye contact with his cock in my mouth is almost too much. I want to retreat but know I can’t.
“Oh fuck,” he says with a hiss. “That sweet little mouth of yours...I want to fill it up.” He holds my head still as I swirl my tongue all over the hot surface of his crown. As he starts to roll his hips in slow circles, I let my lips follow the silky-smooth surface of his shaft as he forces more of it into my mouth.
His erection is rock hard, yet the surface feels velvety smooth against my lips. How can something be so hard and yet so soft at the same time? He moves his hands lovingly through my hair, directing me along his cock. It seems to grow a little bit harder and bigger as it throbs. I know he’s close. My own body is tingling all over.
“Yeah, baby, just like that...suck my cock the way I like it.”
The words ricochet around my head. I want every filthy naughty word he knows.
“Look at you with those pretty eyes looking at me while I fuck your mouth. What a good girl you are. You love my cock, don't you?”
“Mmmm.” The vibrations of my moan makes him tighten his hold on my head. The sheer size of his cock
wildly turns me on, but it’s the way he’s starting to allow himself to let go with me that makes my pussy pulse with need. He slowly bucks his hips back and forth then starts full-on thrusts, pumping his cock in and out of my mouth, stretching my lips tightly around his massive member.
“Oh God. Baby, you feel so good. I don’t want to come yet, but you’re going to make me, aren’t you? Naughty girl. So greedy. Are you ready for it? Are you going to swallow my come, sweet thing?”
I nod. I want it. I feel like some kind of junkie. I’ve fooled around with a few guys, but never swallowed. Never wanted to. But I want to know what it will feel like when I take him all the way, when his essence slides down my throat. God. I’m loving feeling so slutty.
“Oh fuck, Hillary...Fuck... here it comes!” he groans. Mac grunts loudly over and over, and the underside of his cock pulses against my tongue as it pumps jets of come. My mouth fills with him, and I have to swallow repeatedly to keep it from spilling out. I begin to think he'll never stop coming. I just keep swallowing. When he finally finishes, his dick starts to soften, and I lick it all over and let it fall from my mouth.
He’s breathing hard, his chest heaving up and down, and his cock lays heavily against his thigh. Wet and glistening.
“Oh, Jesus,” he pants. “Baby, that was amazing. I’ve never come that hard. Or that much. Are you okay?”
My chest fills with feminine pride. “I feel fantastic.”
“You just fucking wait.”
Mac
I TUG HER HAND, PULLING her up and wrench her shorts down to her ankles. “You’ve been a very good girl, making me come so hard. It’s time for your reward.” I push her onto the bed and kneel between her legs. My thick finger looks obscenely big on her pussy as I part her puffy, wet lips. I slide my finger slowly up the smooth inside of her wet skin.
Beautiful.
She’s pretty worked up from giving me that incredible blow job, her body wracking with tremors if I even skim lightly over her clit. “Oh, you like that, do you? You like me touching your pretty pussy? You’re so wet, sweetheart. You must have really liked having my cock in your mouth.” I rub her clit with slow, tight, small circles and use a little pressure as I move my other hand between her legs and slide two fingers into her. She bucks against my large fingers, moving herself up and down on them, as her juices ran down my hand. My other hand works the pearl of her clit in circles, slowly increasing pressure. “Look at you, fucking yourself on my fingers. You’re making me get hard again already.”