by Nikki Ashton
“I’m not expecting any calls,” I replied, avoiding eye contact with him.
“Nope, but you’re hoping.”
I flicked Jethro the bird and picked up my drink, taking a long sip.
“So, it’s getting pretty serious then?” Jethro asked
I shrugged. “I don’t know what you’d say was serious. Do I think about her all the time – yes. Do I want to see her all the time – yes. Do I love her – well no, but I sure do like her a helluva lot.”
“I think you more than like her old man.” Jethro winked at me and grinned.
“What’s more than like?” I asked, frowning at him. “It’s not love, because I know I don’t love her.”
“Yet.”
“I’m not saying it’s not a possibility, but just not at the moment,” I stressed to Jethro with his shit-eating grin. “So how can I more than like her?”
I looked expectantly at him, waiting for his words of wisdom. As always, he thought he was some sort of fucking Life Coach, yet he lived alone in a small apartment above a health food shop because he was paying hundreds every month to a bitter ex for an eleven-year-old kid he barely saw. And why was he living like that – because the good looking fucker couldn’t keep his dick in his pants every time a woman asked him if he was the guy from Game of Thrones. This despite the fact that the guy didn’t have tats and Jethro had two full sleeves to his knuckles and was probably twenty pounds lighter than the guy who screwed the chick with the dragons. So, yeah, he really needed to rethink the idea that he could sort my life out, until he’d worked on his own.
“I think you call it ‘pre-love’,” he stated. “The stage between love and like.”
“What, like pre-cum?” I asked jokingly.
Jethro nodded, looking serious. “Yeah exactly.”
I rolled my eyes and took another long swig of my drink. I didn’t know, maybe he was right, maybe I was more than ‘in like’ with Katie. I knew that we’d gone way beyond just dating, we were boyfriend and girlfriend, but other than that I had no damn clue what to say about us. What I did know was, I was desperate to see her, desperate to spend time with her, and fucking desperate as all hell to bury myself in her. It’d been a while before I met Katie since I’d had sex, now add the three or so weeks of her enticing me with her pretty face, amazing ass, and downright craziness, and I was as horny as a thirteen-year-old boy watching a cheerleading competition.
“So?” Jethro prompted.
“So, what?” I placed my drink down and took a sneaky glance at my cell.
“Are you in pre-love with her?” Jethro folded his arms, holding onto his bottle between his thumb and forefinger, waiting patiently for my response.
I shrugged.
“What sort of fucking answer it that?” he cried.
“The only one I got. I have no idea whether I’m in pre-love with her. Like I said, I like her a lot, so can we leave it at that for now?”
“You’re no fucking fun when you’re not getting any. I think your balls are so fucking full, they’re actually dragging you down.”
“How do you know my balls are full?” I asked looking down at them, wondering if they looked any bigger than usual.
“Stands to reason, you haven’t had a hook up with Debbie in a while, you told me nothing happened last time you saw her and I know you haven’t done the deed with Katie so, voila, full balls.” Jethro pointed at my crotch with his beer bottle.
I burst out laughing, despite the fact he was talking shit. “Stupid idiot,” I muttered.
“Seriously dude,” he replied. “I feel for you, I’ve been there. I know no amount of introducing your cock to Pam and her five lovely sisters, eases the pain.” He did a Jazz hand at me as he grimaced. “There’s only the real thing that can do it.”
“When have you ever had blue balls?” I scoffed. “I’ve had longer bathroom breaks than you’ve had time between women.”
Jethro thought about it for a few seconds and then lifted a finger. “When I was eighteen, I broke my leg and was holed up in the house for almost two weeks. My bloody mum wouldn’t let me go out, in the end I was so desperate, I ordered in.”
“Ordered in? What, like pizza or Chinese food?”
Jethro shook his head. “No you stupid fucker. I called a couple of girls I knew. They turned up with magazines and grapes and told my mum they were just visiting to see how I was.”
“But you had sex with them both?”
Jethro lifted a shoulder and smiled. “What can I say, when a man needs to cum, he needs to cum. Plus, when you’ve got a leg in plaster, they have to do all the work. It takes the pressure off and makes things much more enjoyable, especially with a pair of tits in your face and a pair of lips on your cock at the same time.”
“Nice,” I said, wondering how he ever managed to bag a woman with his lack of charm. “So two weeks is the longest you’ve ever gone without sex?” I wasn’t shocked one bit. He was a real dog when it came to women. Not mean or cruel about it, making it clear from the start he wasn’t interested in anything other than sex, but if he’d had a revolving door on his bedroom I wouldn’t be surprised.
“Well yeah,” he replied. “If you don’t count the fourteen years before I lost my virginity.”
“Fourteen? Woah, that’s pretty young.”
“Yeah it was,” he said with a wistful sigh. “The girl was sixteen and had these huge knockers.” Jethro put his hands in front of his chest, indicating a pair of tits. “Which you may think was a dream for a fourteen-year-old boy, but one look at them and boom, my dick exploded like a bottle of coke that had been shook up.”
I laughed imaging the scene – probably very similar to my own experience on my sixteenth birthday – not my finest sexual moment, it had to be said.
“I gave it ten minutes though and I was ready to try again. That time I lasted a whole four minutes.” Jethro furrowed his brow. “I don’t even know whether the girl got off or not.”
“Do you even remember her name?” I asked.
He thought about it and then his eyes lit up. “Yep. Amanda Willington. Pretty girl with brown hair and braces. What about you, who was your first?”
I didn’t hesitate. “Bettina Johnson. She was a cheerleader and real bendy.”
“Hah, why am I not surprised that you fucked a cheerleader?”
I grinned and took a drink of my beer before responding. “I played football, of course I was gonna have my first experience with a cheerleader. I even dated one for two years.”
We had turned our conversation to music for a few minutes, when I saw my cell buzzing with an incoming call. I grabbed it, hoping it might be Katie, but was disappointed to see it was international. I pressed at the screen to drop the call.
“When will they get the fucking hint that I know there’s no fucking issue with my computer, or that I can’t be tricked into giving out my bank details,” I moaned.
“Not who you hoped it to be?” Jethro gave me a knowing smirk as his gaze drifted over my shoulder.
“Told you I ain’t expecting a call. I’m just sick of scammers.”
“Well forget the scammers and maybe consider how you’d feel if the woman of your dreams walked into this bar.” He nodded toward the entrance, which was behind me.
I swiveled in my seat to see the most beautiful sight I’d seen in three days – Katie was walking in, laughing and joking with one of the other women in her group of four.
“I think,” Jethro said, tapping my hand, “you should go on over there and maybe this time tomorrow, your little issue will be resolved.”
Without taking my eyes off Katie, I flipped him off, watching her walk across the room to the bar. She leaned across it and gave her order to the weedy, tall guy serving and then turned to her friends, one of whom I recognized as Mandy.
“Just fucking go and talk to her,” Jethro groaned out.
I turned back to him. “No, she’s out with her friends. I don’t wanna spoil her night.”
&
nbsp; He rolled his eyes. “Since when did you become such a pussy? Or do you have performance anxiety, is that why you haven’t done the business yet?”
“You’re so fucking funny aren’t you?”
“I like to think so. I’m just trying to help you, because if you don’t get laid soon old man, we’re going to have to push your bollocks around in a wheelbarrow.”
I couldn’t help but laugh at the stupid douche. At least he’d taken my mind off Katie – until she’d miraculously appeared in the bar of course.
“Oh wait,” Jethro said, lifting his bottle to his lips. “You may have to go over there and spoil her night.”
“Why?” I sighed.
“Because some guy dressed in a sharp suit is hitting on her.”
Quickly I turned around to see Jethro was right. A tall, dark haired prick, with a suit, open-necked shirt, and slick-boy leather brogues was leaning in to Katie’s side and whispering in her ear. They were still at the bar waiting for their drinks and Katie, with a woman on the other side of her and a young couple to her back, had nowhere to go.
I watched for another second or two, as Katie gave him a polite smile and shook her head. The douche then lifted an arm and put it around her shoulders and before I could think about what I was doing, I was off my seat and striding across the bar.
He needed to get his fucking hands off my woman.
Katie
The man with his arm over my shoulder was really invading my space and I didn’t like it one little bit. Apart from the fact his breath smelled of garlic, I was having a hot sweat and really needed him to move away and let me try and get some air.
“I’m sorry,” I said, pushing at him. “Can you give me some space?” I blew up at my fringe and wafted my shirt, desperately trying to fan away the heat that was slowly rising up my body. My stomach churned as the feeling of boiling water being poured into the top of my head and filling me from the feet up, caused sweat to form between my boobs and along my forehead and top lip.
“You don’t like me giving you a hug?” he asked, pushing his face closer to mine.
“I’m really hot,” I puffed out, anxiety starting to take over me.
When I had a flush, the feeling of claustrophobia sometimes came with it. I couldn’t explain why, just that I needed space to deal with the heat enveloping my body.
Mr. Hugger didn’t take the hint and pulled me tighter against his side. “I’d totally agree with that,” he said with what I was sure he thought was a sexy smirk. “You are most definitely hot.”
“Yeah,” a deep American drawl said behind us. “And she’s also my girlfriend, so if you wouldn’t mind taking your hands off her, it’d be much appreciated.”
I let out a sigh of relief and swiveled around to look at Dex. The unwanted arm dropped from my shoulder and Mr. Hugger took a step away from me.
“Sorry, mate,” he said, holding his hands up in surrender. “I didn’t mean any trouble.”
“It’s fine,” Dex said, maneuvering himself next to me, pushing Mr. Hugger aside. “But when a lady tells you she needs you to remove your arm from her shoulder, I suggest you listen.”
Mr. Hugger frowned and straightened his spine, and for one horrible moment I thought he was going to start a fight with Dex. Thankfully, a hand tapped him on the shoulder, causing him to move his attention from us.
“Come on, John,” his friend said. “We’re off to The Dog.”
Mr. Hugger glanced over his shoulder at me and then strode away with his friends, leaving me to heave a sigh of relief.
“You okay, darlin’?” Dex asked. His brow was furrowed in anxious concern as he placed a palm on the small of my back.
“Hmm, fine, just really hot.” I reached across the bar and snagged up one of their menus and started to frantically fan myself with it.
I was mortified that Dex was witnessing me turn into a sweaty mess, but it was too late to make a run for the ladies and hide until it had finished. Dex, however, didn’t seem one bit embarrassed that his girlfriend was a lovely shade of red and had a thin sheen of sweat making her glisten in the lights of the bar.
“Can I have a glass of cold water, please?” Dex asked the barman before turning back to me. “You want to go outside for a while, to cool off?”
I shook my head, my hair blowing in the breeze of the flapping menu. “No, it’ll pass.”
“Okay, and you’re sure he didn’t hurt you?” he asked, nodding toward the door that Mr. Hugger had disappeared through.
I nodded and then turned to the bar as a glass of water and four glasses of wine were placed next to me. The barman told me how much I owed him, but before I could even reach into my bag for my card, Dex had handed over some cash.
“Dex!” I admonished. “You’re not paying.”
“Too late Katie Cat, I already did. Now, drink this water first.”
He passed me the half pint of water, watching carefully as I took a long drink of it, while still fanning myself. Finally, when there was only about a half inch left in the bottom, the heat was beginning to recede from my body. Grateful the flush had been a quick one, I placed the glass back on the bar along with the menu.
“Okay now?”
I nodded. “Much, although I’m guessing I’m a real sweaty mess.” I felt the back of my neck under my hair and wasn’t surprised to find it wet.
“No you’re not. You look just as beautiful as ever.”
My heart did a little fist pump as Dex leaned in and kissed me softly.
“Thank you,” I said with a sigh. “It’s horrible having them in public, but in front of your new boyfriend makes it worse. Actually, do you think we’re too old to be boyfriend and girlfriend?”
Dex gave a low laugh and shook his head. “Where the hell did that come from?”
“I don’t know.” I shrugged. “It just occurred to me.”
“And the alternative is what?” he asked, in an amused tone.
“You could be my man friend and I’ll be your lady friend.” I considered it for a second and grimaced. “Nope that makes it sound like we only meet up in hotel rooms every second Tuesday of the month to have sex, which I might add, you keep your socks and vest on for.”
Dex blinked rapidly a few times and opened his mouth. He didn’t say anything, but after a few seconds blew out a breath. “Nope, sorry. I have no fucking words.”
I grinned at him and was pleased to see him giving me one right back.
“You want to come and meet the girls?” I asked, reaching out to link my fingers with his.
He looked over to the table where Mandy, Trisha, and Samantha were sitting. All waiting patiently for their large glasses of wine.
“I don’t want to impose. Plus, I’m here with Jethro.” He indicated with a thumb over his shoulder to a table where I could see a guy concentrating on his mobile phone. I guessed it might be Jethro, because his arms were covered in tattoos, not dissimilar to the style of Dex’s.
“He can join us too,” I suggested.
Dex shook his head. “Shit, no. You’re girls are all married, right?” I nodded my head. “Well, he’d see it as a challenge to get one of them into bed. Now, I’m sure he wouldn’t succeed, but he’d make a real twat of himself trying to do it and I do not want to be embarrassed the first time I meet them.”
He sounded totally sincere and I couldn’t help but laugh. “Just come and say hello. Help me take the wine over.”
“Okay, but it’s your girl’s night, so I’m only going to do that – say hi.”
I almost squeaked with excitement at being able to show off Dex to my friends. They’d all been through the divorce with me and knew how much Carl marrying Sophie had affected my confidence, so I knew they were all thrilled for me. Mandy had even given the other two a description of Dex, and when she’d said he was a tattooed hottie with plenty in the crotch department – I might have told her about our sofa sessions – I couldn’t help but feel a little bit proud that I’d managed to pull him.
His breath against my skin immediately woke up my fanny, which had been locked in my knickers for so long I’d decided to rename it Rapunzel. Goosebumps broke out over my skin and I definitely felt a tightness in my bra.
“Taxi,” I replied.
“You get one with me then,” Dex stated. “Call me when you’re ready to go, I’ll come to you, we get a taxi and go back to your place. The kids are with Carl, aren’t they?”
I nodded, staring at him unblinking. “Isaac‘s gone to a festival.”
“Yep, I know darlin’, that’s why I’m staying over.”
Oh my god, he was so hot when he was being authoritative. I’d never get any tattooing done if I worked for him – not that I can tattoo, maybe I’d work reception or do some admin type stuff, or-.
“Katie Cat,” he whispered. “I know that look, you’re over thinking things.”
“No, honestly, I’m totally fine with your plan. Absolutely fine. Better than fine. I am extremely happy with your suggestion. I-.”
“Darlin’, grab a couple of those glasses and let’s go meet your girls, because I’ve got to be honest, the sooner its time to go home, the better.”
“Can I just ask one question?”
“Yeah, of course.”
“How is Isaac really doing at Heaven & Ink?”
Dex let out a laugh and scratched his head. “We’ll talk about that later, in the cab on the way home, now pick up the wine and let’s go.”
Yep, Rapunzel was about to be set free and was up doing burpees, getting fit and ready for the action to come.
Katie
Dex’s quick hello to the girls lasted the rest of the evening. They all found him lovely and charming and insisted that he and Jethro joined us. Jethro, as Dex predicted, tried to get Samantha to go home with him but got nowhere. To give him credit, Jethro tried really hard, but finally realized he was wasting his time when Samantha showed him pictures of her gorgeous husband, Danny, and their cute boys, Bobby and Theo.