I deserve some happiness too, she assured herself.
“So guess what happened to me at school today,” Liza said as she peered at Mrs. Dedarling’s nails disappearing into the table’s surface. “Mandy asked me to hang out with her.”
“So that’s what that was about,” Devon grunted.
“Isn’t that hilarious?”
He looked doubtful.
“She’s setting you up for something.”
“Maybe,” Liza agreed, “but there’s something I need to tell you, and I’m sorry I didn’t tell you before. It’s just—”
“It’s okay,” he said, “trust takes time. Tell me now.”
“Mandy can turn invisible.”
“She can what?”
“It’s not just you and me who can do stuff,” Liza said.
“Is there anyone else?”
She bit her lip. “Chad, Troy, and his brother Gibbie.”
Devon nodded slowly. “Did you tell her what I can do?”
“Of course not,” Liza said, “I don’t share your business.”
“Good girl,” he said. “Let’s keep it that way.”
“You should have seen her face when I told her I’d think about it, like I was turning down dinner with Justin Timberlake or something.”
“I think you should accept,” Devon said, pouring more champagne.
“Yeah right,” she snorted, but looking at his face, she said, “You can’t be serious.”
“Have you ever seen the movie Mean Girls?” he asked.
She nodded, her clunky mind starting to pick up speed.
“You want me to infiltrate them.”
He grinned wickedly.
“It will be our masterpiece.”
He kissed her on the mouth, with just a bit of tongue, and then whispered in her ear, “I’m so glad we met.”
“Me too,” Liza blushed, and then with surprise asked, “You’ve seen Mean Girls?”
He shrugged. “I’m a big Tina Fey fan. She does a wicked Sarah Palin.”
Chapter 13
Troy felt an unexpected halo of joy around himself as football practice wrapped up for the evening.
“Good to have you back,” Coach Lenwick said.
“It’s good to be back,” Troy replied. He was surprised by how much he meant it. Wrestling was cool, and he was team captain, but it was very individualistic. Football meant you really had to play like a team. It meant you belonged.
“Hold back, Allstar,” Jesse said to him as everyone else headed for the locker room. “There are a couple of plays we need to go over if you’re going to be ready for tomorrow’s game.”
“I really didn’t think I’d be on the field that soon.”
Jesse shrugged. “Come on, man, it’s all about forward motion.”
The plays they went over weren’t anything special. Troy was hesitant to even call them new, but he was not about to complain. By the time they got to the locker room, the last of the players were filing out. Chad was the only person remaining. His short shorts and pompons were packed in the bag over his back. He wore a button-down, short-sleeved shirt that hugged his biceps tightly. He was dressed not unlike the way Troy often did.
“Hey Troy, I thought I’d wait in case you needed a ride home.”
Chad held up his keys.
“No, I’m cool,” Troy said.
The male cheerleader looked from Troy to Jesse.
“Oh.”
Troy could feel Chad’s whiff of jealousy.
“Chad…”
“Whatever,” Chad said in an off-hand manner. He walked out, trying to look nonchalant.
Jesse made a low whistling sound as the door closed and they both stripped off their football gear, down to their pants.
“Looks like someone’s got a crush on you.”
Troy winced. “Quiet. He’ll hear.”
“A dog wouldn’t have heard that,” Jesse defended himself.
Troy sighed.
“A cat might have.”
“Come on, man, forget the cheerleader. You and me, we’re back, the dream team reunited. Ain’t nothing can stop us now.”
“Yeah,” Troy said, a little nervously.
“Easy, man,” Jesse said, “I know things got a little weird, but that was just one time, just two friends horsing around. No big deal, right?”
“Sure,” Troy said. Still, he couldn’t resist the occasional sideways glance at his friend’s powerful thighs in his tight football pants. A silver eagle was hanging from a chain, nestled in the cleft of Jesse’s big chest.
Troy reached out and held the pendant.
“You still have this,” he smiled wistfully.
“Of course,” Jesse replied. “Don’t you still have yours?”
“Somewhere,” Troy replied.
“Well dig it out,” Jesse ordered, smacking his friend’s butt.
Troy felt the wave of heat in Jesse’s temples. It could just be that the radiators were turned up too high or…
“Come here,” Jesse said, wrapping his bulging arms around his friend’s slightly smaller but no less muscled form. Against his better judgment, Troy hugged back, hard, his forehead pressing into the crook of Jesse’s neck.
“I really missed you, buddy,” Jesse said.
“I…I missed you too,” Troy replied. His grip on Jesse tightened for a moment, and then they stepped away from each other, their hands lingering on each other’s smooth skin for just a moment too long.
Jesse cupped Troy’s jaw, and they stared into one another’s eyes.
“We said things wouldn’t get weird this time, remember?” Troy said.
“Yeah, man, I remember,” Jesse replied, but still he did not take his hand from his friend’s face. Troy could pull away, but it felt good, and right. He tried to push the feeling away, but having Chad walk out in a huff, coupled with the waves of warmth washing off Jesse, coupled with Troy’s own…
Loneliness.
…attraction—it was like gongs in his head. He was exhausted from practice, and pushing down the encroaching emotions was like gripping sand.
“Jesus, dude, stop twisting yourself into a knot,” Jesse said. He guided his friend and they sat on a bench, leaning against the lockers.
“Seriously, man, it is great having you back,” Jesse said, squeezing Troy’s leg.
Troy lolled his head back, eyes closed, enjoying the sense of being touched.
Jesse started massaging the hard muscles. The hand started moving upward. Troy grabbed his friend’s wrist.
“We can’t do this again.”
Troy stared into Jesse’s eyes and the resistance wavered.
“You have really pretty lips,” Troy said, feeling as if he were very far away.
“Prettier than Chad’s?” Jesse countered, flashing that big smile of his.
“What?” Troy snorted with a laugh that almost sounded stoned. For an empath, Jesse’s feelings were intoxicating, especially since they matched Troy’s own.
“I saw the way you looked at him,” Jesse answered.
“Well…” Troy hesitated, before nodding slowly. “Since you ask, Chad’s lips are prettier. Sorry, bud, he’s got you beat in that department.”
“Ouch!” Jesse said, playing along. “That’s cool, that’s cool, the boy’s got fine lips, I’ll give him that.”
“And a great ass,” Troy said with uncharacteristic abandon. Only Jesse brought out this side in him. Only with Jesse did Troy feel funny and flirty and free.
“Are you telling me you tapped that?” Jesse challenged.
“Touch me here,” Troy said, ignoring the question and placing Jesse’s hand on his chest.
“You like that?” Jesse teased.
“Meh,” Troy shrugged, “Chad does it better.”
He started laughing at that.
“That’s two,” Jesse warned, his grin growing even wider. “But that’s cool. I’m glad you fooled around with Chad. Means you’re finally figuring it out.”
&
nbsp; Troy reached over and began rubbing the stubble on the back of Jesse’s scalp.
“Figured what out?”
“You tap your boy toy, and call it a day.”
Troy dropped his hand to rest on Jesse’s boulder shoulder.
“It wasn’t like that. It was…”
“Special? Right. ’Cause you two are in love.”
“I never said that. But I don’t know…there’s more to him than meets the eye.”
“Man, what you’ve done is so genius, I’m starting to think even you don’t get it,” Jesse said.
Troy stared at him blankly.
“See, you pick a guy that you are never going to fall for, ’cause, let’s be honest, Chad? Hot, hot, hot, and nelly, nelly, nelly. Ain’t no way you’re ever going to develop feelings for him. It’s cool. You get busy with the little fella, and then have your girlfriend to hang on your arm at parties, get married, whatever.”
“Chad’s not nelly,” Troy said defensively. “I mean, he is…”
Troy felt like he was betraying Chad. Jesse didn’t notice. He began kissing Troy’s fingers.
“The down low is the way to go,” Jesse said. “Guys like us, we’re so straight even the straight guys want to do us. That’s the way to keep it.”
“On the down low,” Troy repeated, trying to wrap his mind around the idea.
“That’s right, my man. Forget friends of Dorothy. This is the millennium. It’s all about the DL. My mom told me all about it.”
“Your mom?” Troy said.
“Yeah, man, she saw it on Oprah.”
And then Jesse was done talking, and deftly pulled Troy’s unresisting lips to his own.
Chad’s face was a twisting storm. He stood outside the change room door. His ears were pointed. He heard every word. Could hear what they were doing now. The blond glared at the basketball court.
“I am not going to be treated this way,” he vowed, remembering how Jake had left him for a football scholarship. Now Troy and Jesse…
With a deep breath, Chad turned, prepared to go on his way, letting Troy go on his. And then Mandy emerged from the girls’ locker room.
“So I’ve been thinking,” she said, rummaging in her purse, “my approach with Troy has been all wrong—you know, going from totally aloof to completely needy. I need to find the right balance so I don’t scare him off the way I did Jesse.”
“Mandy,” Chad interrupted, getting a very vindictive idea.
“Yeah?” she looked into her friend’s very serious face.
He jerked his thumb over his shoulder at the boys’ locker room.
“There’s something you need to see.”
Troy knew he was being reckless. Fooling around with Jesse, in the boys’ locker room, no less. That went beyond mental. If they were caught… Already he could feel their social standing crumbling beneath their feet. But bigger than that was the feel of Jesse’s lips, and their bond from many years of friendship, deepening with every kiss.
I can be on the down low, Troy assured himself. What’s one more secret?
It all seemed so doable. This felt like heaven after all, until “Hung Up,” by Madonna, began to play. Jesse pulled his lips from Troy’s chest.
“Who’s there?!” Jesse yelled.
There was no answer. Troy blinked in confusion.
“Was that your cellphone?” Jesse demanded.
“No,” Troy said.
“Well it wasn’t mine.” Jesse began throwing open lockers, searching for a spy. “I am going to kill whoever is in here!”
“Maybe somebody just forgot their phone,” Troy offered. But he knew that wasn’t the case. Someone was here. He could feel her.
There was a clatter of heels on tile, echoing clearly, and there was a splash in a pool of water as if someone had stepped in it, but there was no one to be seen. The door opened of its own accord, and then slowly closed shut.
Troy clenched his fists.
Mandy.
Troy grabbed Jesse’s arm.
“Do not touch me!” Jesse yelled, pushing his friend away. “Are you crazy? If word of this gets out, I will kill you!”
“But,” Troy said, “what about what you said earlier? About us being the guys even straight guys want to do?”
“How high are you?” Jesse demanded. “Nobody’s going to look up to a couple of faggots. That’s why it’s called the down low, ’cause that’s where it stays.”
Jesse glared at Troy like he was the biggest retard ever.
Jesse quickly rammed his legs into jeans, yanked a T-shirt over his head, and jerked his bag off the bench. When he slammed his locker shut, the sound was like a gunshot ringing in Troy’s ears.
“We should talk,” Troy said.
Jesse rounded on him. “Not a word. Do you hear me? This did not happen.”
Troy’s head hung low as he buttoned up his shirt, not daring to look at Jesse as his friend stomped out.
Chapter 14
When the tones of “Hung Up” began playing from the phone in her hand, Mandy failed to realize the sound was coming from her— she was too mesmerized by the sight of Jesse macking with Troy to register something so banal as a novelty ring tone.
It was not until Jesse yelled “Who’s there?” that she snapped out of it.
And then she ran, her heels clicking audibly on the concrete floor.
Bursting out of the gymnasium, she grabbed Chad, enveloping him in invisibility and pushing him towards the exit. Outside by the dumpster, they popped back into view. Chad’s stomach tightened.
“What did you see?”
“Exactly what you wanted me to see, asshole!”
She punched him hard on the shoulder.
“You knew,” she shouted. “You know you knew, and you didn’t tell me!”
“I…I…,” Chad stammered.
“You goddamn piece of twinkie trash!” she shouted.
She kept hitting him, punch after punch, on his back and his
arms, even a couple of swift slaps to the side of his head. She pushed him into the dumpster and grabbed his shirt tight in her grip. Buttons popped off it.
“How long, Chad? Huh? How long have you been keeping this from me?”
His breathing was ragged. He stared into her serious face.
“I…,” he hesitated.
“Tell me!”
“Not long.”
She pushed him hard onto asphalt. He didn’t even try to fight back.
“Since the night at the mall,” he said. “Troy, he took me home, and he got into bed with me and we…I… I’m so sorry, Mandy.”
She towered over him. He looked ready to speak. She spat in his face. He cowered and did not wipe her saliva away.
“I’m sor—” he tried to apologize.
“Don’t.” She held up a warning finger. “I never want to speak to you again.”
He reached for her and her force field sprang into place.
“Go hang with your fag friends and have a good laugh at stupid Mandy,” she said. “I’m not your goddamn hag!”
She marched off towards the parking lot.
When she reached her yellow VW Bug, Liza was leaning on the hood, waiting.
“What are you…?” Mandy asked, totally confused and wiping away tears.
“You said we could hang out sometime,” Liza explained. “Are you okay?”
“In what parallel universe do I look okay?” Mandy snapped, then, taking a deep breath, said, “Sorry. It’s just…kind of bad timing.”
“Mandy.”
She turned. It was Troy, his hair disheveled, shirt untucked, fingers clenched into fists.
“Who the hell do you think you are?” he shouted, and it was like hammers battering her insides.
“I…” Her mouth gaped.
“What the hell were you thinking?” he demanded. “Do you have any idea what you’ve done?”
“Lied to you?” Mandy shouted back. “Humiliated you? Made you look like a fool? Well, let the punis
hment fit the crime.”
He blushed.
“That isn’t fair, I never meant…”
“Well neither did I.”
Liza just kept staring at the ground. She coughed awkwardly, and the other two remembered that she was there.
“Hey,” he said to Liza, “we’re not normally like this.”
“It’s cool,” she replied.
To Mandy he said, “Your cellphone. Please tell me you didn’t take any…”
He didn’t even have to finish the sentence. The wave of guilt from the cheerleader said it all.
“I’ll erase it,” she said.
And he knew she spoke true.
He just never bothered to ask Liza what she would do.
The two girls watched Troy walk back to the gym, ignoring Chad.
“Sorry about that,” Mandy said to Liza. “How about I give you a ride home, and we’ll hang out tomorrow, I promise. Okay?”
“Sure,” Liza said.
They drove in silence, Liza occasionally eyeing Mandy’s cellphone.
“Turn right here,” Liza said. “Now left…oh, slow down, this is it.”
Mandy took in Liza’s home—the weeds, the mailbox tilted at an angle, the peeling paint on the sagging front porch. Liza waited for the cheerleader’s usual scathing remarks, but all Mandy said was “Sorry again about today.”
“It’s okay. You seemed pretty upset. You know, I might be able to help.”
“I don’t think so,” Mandy replied tartly.
“No, really, I’ve been practicing, just like you guys, but with my voice. It’s good for more than just blowing stuff up. I’ll show you.”
Gently, Liza began to sing.
Mandy tilted her head, considering this unexpected song, delivered with such grace from a form that was anything but graceful.
“That’s really pretty,” Mandy said, her words coming out slightly slurred.
Liza kept singing. Mandy’s eyelids began to flutter.
“What are you…,” she said drowsily.
She never finished the sentence, her chin lolling to her chest.
Twenty minutes later Liza and Devon gazed at Mandy’s yellow VW.
“You sure you want to let her go?” Liza asked. She looked at Mandy the way she’d looked at Mrs. Dedarling through the eyepiece—as if she were a thing. It was fair enough, Liza figured, considering how the cheerleader had looked at her all these years.
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