by Cora Davies
Hailey quickly ran back into her room as quietly as she could. She dove under the covers and waited for Eric to come back to bed. She would give him a chance to tell her what was going on. Maybe he wasn't going to do what his brother thought he was going to do and just disappear. Maybe he would think of a way to get her out of this mess. She stayed in bed for almost two minutes before hearing the front door shut. Eric did just what his brother had told him to do. He left her alone.
***
Hailey spent the morning mad at herself. She pulled out her laptop and attempted to work, but she killed off her hero. It would not be a good day to write a romance. Instead, she set to spring-cleaning the house, starting with her own bedding which smelled like Eric Fucking James-the traitor.
But it was not just Eric's fault. Hailey had allowed herself to sleep with him. She got swept up in his dark eyes and larger than life muscles and spread her legs. She should have known he was a player. They were all the same. Artists were a piece of work. She definitely should have known better.
Hailey threw the pillows out of their cases and across the room as she reflected on the artists she had dated. With each piece of linen she dropped over the banister she thought of a different time she thought she would try to find passion and love again. As each face passed through her eyes, she flipped off the air around her.
Three years after Paul's death, Hailey had finally decided to enter the dating field again. It was a poor decision. She dated a painter, who just wanted her to lay around his house naked all the time eating fruit and holding flowers in between her toes. They got high all day and drank entirely too much vodka each night. Many of those nights she forgot she had a twelve-year-old daughter at home. Later, after an unsuccessful intervention but a successful placement in a short-term psychiatric clinic-she discovered she had a mental breakdown while dating him. She was then able to blame her reckless behavior on her mental problems. She was able to retrieve some of her dignity back in front of her mother. The dignity that she felt like she lost again when she found out said painter had sold a nude of her for several thousand dollars. He entitled it The Lost Widow.
Next she had dated a writer-a serious literary type-who was drunk almost every day of the week. He said it opened his mind. He went mad over her and she did go a little crazy for him for a while. This was still before the short stay at the clinic, when she did not know she could blame her problems on her mental breakdown. The writer, Guy, wrote an entire book of short stories about Hailey, and he trashed his publisher's office when they would not print it. His agent had told Hailey she was Guy's Yoko. Finally, after he burned Hailey's car to the ground, she filed a restraining order. It had amazingly worked all these years.
Finally, there had been the musician, who was the calmest of the bunch, despite musician's reputations. Of course, maybe the fact that he was a flute player and not a guitar player in a grunge band made him calmer. They had been serious for about three months when he admitted a sexual fantasy including Hailey and his flute. She declined and he stormed out of her apartment. She never heard from him again.
It was after the flutist that she decided she was done dating. That lasted two years-during which time she attended the clinic, grew stronger, purchased the ranch, and finally became a mother she approved of again. It was during the loneliness when her life was quiet that she met Herb. The two of them worked out an arrangement to keep the loneliness at bay for both of them. Now there was this thing with Eric. No wonder everyone kept throwing her past reckless behavior into her face. She was an idiot when it came to men. All men except for one.
Paul. He had been the perfect man.
In Hailey's years of research when writing romance novels, she had found that most young widows did not remember arguments with their husbands. Their husbands picked their socks up off the floor, helped with dinner, and took the kids to soccer practice. Was this because only the good die young? Or was this because they built idols in our heads from the dead? Hailey believed the later when it came to most people. But when it came to her and Paul, it was like two pieces of the puzzle snapped into place.
They started dating freshmen year, and by her senior year, they knew they would marry shortly after graduation. Paul had dropped out early senior year and joined the military when his father died, and days after graduation she left her home behind to see the world with Paul. When Hailey found out she was pregnant only months into their new lives as adults, they could not have been happier.
It had been a fairy tale-until Risa grew sick. Hailey felt her palms grow sweaty and the bile rising in her throat just thinking of it. Risa had battled and won, and they thought life would go back to that fairy tale. But Paul had survived multiple deployments over the years just to die violently outside their home one spring evening. The fairy tale had been crushed. Hailey's life and happiness had forever changed.
When she wrote The Passenger's Control, it was about her and Paul's life and love. She changed the ending in her book. unable or unwilling to dwell on the real details. The story had been therapeutic to write and had been her first attempt at being published at her mother's insistence. She never thought it would be published, never thought anyone would ever read about her life. The book was picked up immediately and Hailey became a success-something she had not planned on becoming.
The buzzer on the dryer sounded, yanking Hailey back into the present. She pulled the sheets from the dryer, dumping them into the white laundry basket and then stomped across the hardwood floor towards the stairs. It was almost noon, but damn it, she was going to make the bed and go back to sleep.
No one was supposed to find her in this isolation she had created. Except, somehow Eric had. And now... her stalker had. For someone who was supposed to stay out of the spotlight, she was walking a thin line toward it. Tempting fate with her books and now with Eric Fucking James.
Eric James, who threw her world upside down then walked away. Right before she was about to get fucked up by the press and who knows who else-he left.
The front door opened.
Eric James, who stood bare-chested and sweaty in her doorway. He wiped his forehead with the shirt he held.
Hailey dropped the basket as the door shut behind Eric. Her body came to life seeing him in front of her. "What are you doing here?"
"I was hoping I could bum some food off of you. I didn't make it back to my hotel last night to pack a lunch." Eric looked her up and down and raised his eyebrow. Heat rose to Hailey's cheeks when she remembered she was in her same t-shirt from last night and an old worn out pair of boxer shorts.
"No, I mean, here here." Hailey bent down to pick the laundry that spilled out of the basket up and shoved it back in. "I thought you were leaving town."
"Leaving town?" Eric asked raising an eyebrow. "I've got one more week of work to finish up."
Hailey let out a sigh but she was not sure if it was a relief. She worked to steel herself so he would not see the trembles that were fighting to surface through her body as she thought about last night. More importantly, he said he was staying. Would he really be here when the press came? "Okay, well you know where the food is."
"Hailey, is something wrong?" Eric asked. Hailey shook her head. "Then why won't you look at me?"
Because you don't have a shirt on asshole. You know what you're doing. "It's just... I need to fold my laundry."
Hailey ran up the stairs as fast as she could while clinging onto the basket. It was an awkward attempt at grace. Eric did not follow her. She was able to make the bed without hearing from him and she figured he really must have come in just to eat. Well, of course, he should be hungry. He's been out there with Jason all day working. And Jason kind of hates him, so he's probably doing the bitch work.
Hailey caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror and cringed. Holy crap. She peeled off her clothes and jumped into the large shower and pulled the glass door shut. She closed her eyes and let the hot water roll down her back, trying to push Eric James from her m
ind. He was here for one thing and one thing only. He confirmed it this morning when she heard him talking to his brother. What he thought was his chance at an Oscar-through her book. She reached for the lavender shampoo and scrubbed her scalp roughly.
Eric might have told her that the sex and the book weren't connected, but they were. It was not every day a movie star showed up in your house and wanted to have sex with you just because he thought you were hot. Especially when you are not. Hailey saw the kind of women Eric dated-they were completely different from her. In more ways than she was sure she could wrap her mind around. She closed her eyes and willed Eric's face to leave her mind.
The air grew cool around her and she opened her eyes. Eric stood just outside the shower-naked and hard. He was looking everywhere but at her face. "Can I join you?"
Hailey's body tingled and she realized that Monday was coming whether she wanted it to or not. She might as well have fun-one last time. She stepped back and made room for Eric to climb in. His hands were on her the second he pulled the door closed. He was kissing her neck, nibbling as he went. How did he know that drove her insane? One hand cupped her wet breast as the water massaged both of their bodies. His other hand traveled lower.
"Wet from the shower or..." he whispered against her ear. Her body shuddered when his fingers pushed inside her slit, opening her. He let the shower beat against her peak before entering her with two fingers. His work along with the steady stream of water brought her almost immediately to a point she had not thought possible moments before.
He was bringing her around to climax and she was holding it back. Angry at both of them still. Something inside her commanded she let go, and take this wild ride with him. She was so close to release when the conversation she overheard that morning came rushing back at her as fast as the water from the showerhead. She wanted to let go, but she was afraid if she did, she would become that woman that she worked so hard to run from. The woman who only ran towards temporary pleasure and ran away from the pain.
Hailey wanted to make herself yell at him. They should both face the pain and the hurt she had felt when he talked to his brother about her. He pulled away from her neck and looked at her with a silly stupid grin on his face, that he quickly exchanged for a surprised expression. Hailey took a breath. "I heard you this morning."
It felt good to admit aloud. Even without yelling at him and telling him how mad she was that he left her no option out of this. Just to drop the anvil-that felt good. Suddenly, everything that she had been holding back against a dam broke free. She threw her head back as she felt the climax wash over her. Eric's hand did not slow down but he bent to whisper in her ear. "I wasn't going to leave you. I was going to talk to you tonight."
"I want..." Hailey barely registered his words but she nodded. He was not going to leave. He was going to stay and help her find a way out of this. She went so quickly from hating him to wanting him inside her again. "Fucking artists."
"What?" Eric asked driving his hand against her with more frequent speed.
"Fuck me," she whispered, feeling the water from the showerhead as it beaded down her breasts and washed all pain from her body. She watched through slit eyes as Eric reached outside the shower with one hand, not taking his other off her. He brought in a condom and ripped the wrapper open with his teeth. She laughed quietly. "You knew you were going to need a condom?"
Eric flipped her around and Hailey braced her hands on the shower wall. He drove into her fast and without mercy. He bent to whisper in her ear, "I always get what I want. And I want you, Hailey, more than I've ever wanted anything."
Hailey leaned against the wall, gripping at the tile with one hand and a washcloth handle with the other. She closed her eyes and pretended like she believed him. She pretended like he actually meant the words he said to her. She felt the full length of him slam into her from behind as he reached around and stroked her again. Tears slid down Hailey's face but not from pain or sadness. But the tears were only release. Just let go, Hailey. Just let go. She repeated over and over again until she finally did let go.
Eric slowed and fell against her body. He breathed heavily against her, his chest pressing into her back. Apparently he let go too. He held her against him tight and she felt good in his arms. He was so strong and in this one second she allowed herself to believe everything was going to be just fine. She felt protected.
She started to feel like she did not want to let go of this fantasy.
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
Eric was slinging shit in the petting zoo fenced in area. It was something he never imagined in all his days he would be doing. He would kill right now for a massage and a manicure. But he would never admit that aloud. Jason was giving him the shittiest jobs on the ranch, pun intended. Eric leaned on the pitchfork and looked back to the house. He had not seen Hailey since that afternoon in the shower.
When he left her, it was with a promise that they would talk tonight. About what? About everything.
Scott was on his way out of town this evening and Eric had considered leaving at the same time, blowing off the movie rights. Scott's words and Raymond's scolding were fresh on his mind when he went inside at lunch today. He was going to go in and tell her he was leaving. He had given up on the rights. The work was too much for him. Things would be less complicated if he left now. He threw the door open and there she was-sexy as hell in her t-shirt and boxers; hair still tousled from sleep. One look at her...
Hailey had been on Eric's mind all morning. He could not help thinking about her, and the more he did, the more he realized he needed to get out of here as soon as possible. The more he thought about getting out of here as soon as possible, the more he thought about staying. Not that there was a place for him out there. She had made that clear several times.
Hailey was not looking for a relationship. She was not looking to fall in love again. She was only having sex with him to fulfill some item on a bucket list- sleep with a movie star. It was the same item on every woman's bucket list, and Eric never complained about it until now. He kicked a mound of shit and the back of his boot heel wedged into the center of the tiny shit hill.
"Just fucking great," he muttered as he pulled his boot out and saw the shit on the bottom of his jeans.
What was he mad about anyway? He was not looking to fall in love. Especially not with a writer who lived out in the middle of nowhere. What would he do? Give up his career to live out here and work for Jason? Or have Hailey give up her ranch, the thing that tied her to her late husband, and follow him back to Hollywood? Whatever she was trying to bury in her past would surface the minute they stepped off the tarmac into that slime infested wasteland called Hollywood.
Eric walked out of the animal pen and over to a small patch of tall grass. He dragged his boot against the green trying to pry as much of the animal dung off as possible. Eric leaned against the small chicken coup when he was sure he was as clean as he would get. He needed to make a decision before he went in to talk to Hailey. He had been out here all day. The sun was threatening to go down soon. If only he had not gone in to see Hailey at lunchtime. Seeing her mad at him when he opened the door, he knew he had to do something to get her mind off things. He did the thing he was best at; he followed her to the shower and fucked her.
He fucked her and he lied to her. He did not know if he was leaving her alone or not to deal with the press Sandy was sending her way. But he told her he would stay. He wanted to be a man who would stay. But he also wanted to grow up and change his image, and he could not do that if the press found him out here shacking up with her in order to get a movie role.
They had not talked this afternoon, though they should have. It had reached the point by now that he felt it was going to be awkward. She had been out on the porch earlier with her laptop; he could have gone up and talked to her then. He'd interrupted her while she was working before. But he did not know what to say without knowing his decision.
He heard gentle footsteps. He did not
turn to look; he knew it was her. No one else out here walked that softly. No one else traveled with the scent of lavender.
"Eric," she said in a smoky voice. She was mere feet away. "Come inside, please."
Eric turned and saw Hailey at the edge of the petting zoo path wringing her hands together. Something was off. She had tried to cover it up with a large pair of sunglasses, but her cheeks were splotchy as if she had been crying. Had he done this to her? Of course, you did. "I need to finish mucking the fenced in area-then I'll be in."
She nodded and started the walk back to the house, pausing to face him for a moment. She looked like she wanted to say something else, but she stepped around to the other side of the barn and was gone. Turning back to the small corral- he realized he still had not made his decision. If he left too soon, he would be out of the movie rights and he would leave her alone when the crew Sandy sent arrived. If he stayed-well if he stayed it would just be more fodder for the press. Hailey would be in the spotlight for a while and eventually the press would move on to whatever woman he decided to date next. But something told him they would never let her live it down in her small town.
It might help increase sales for her ranch. That is brilliant. Maybe Jason is right; Hailey really doesn't know what's best for her.
***
When Eric finally walked into the house almost a half hour later, after everyone had left for the day, Hailey was sitting at the dining table. He left his boots and jeans by the door, smiling sheepishly as he stepped into the kitchen. "They were dirty, I sprayed them off but it only did so much good."
She nodded. He noticed she was careful to keep her eyes on his face and not trail his bare legs. "I'll wash them for you."
She had cooked something all in one glass dish-meat, potatoes, peas, and some kind of sauce. He inspected it and poked the corner with a spatula. It was almost in solid form, but squishy at the same time.