“Are you out of your fucking mind? I didn’t want your ass before I left on that last deployment. I didn’t want you when I came home, and I don’t want you now. I only came down here to tell you face-to-face never to contact me again.”
“What?” she screeched.
“You heard me. Lose my number, forget my name, and while you’re at it change your last name back to Smith.”
“Fine. Then you can’t see Nick.” I flinched, thinking about the nephew I had never met.
Landers cleared his throat. When I glanced in his direction, he mouthed bullshit.
“We’ll see about that. I protect what’s mine. I will go to the ends of the earth to make the boy safe, even if it’s from you.”
And for the first time, I realized that was the truth. I didn’t need to meet the boy to know that I would do everything I could to protect him. I’d long ago forgiven myself for the angry words I’d spoken to my brother, but I’d wondered if I’d ever forgiven my brother for his betrayal? I realized now I had, and I would make sure his son was taken care of.
“Fuck you. Why are you always such a dick?” she screamed. “Fuck you.”
“That’s the Stephanie Clark I know,” I told Landers.
“Jesus. The beauty you have upstairs is a step up in all the ways that matter,” he said, loud enough for her to hear. “Let’s go get Nicholas so the three of you can go home.”
As I walked back to the bullpen, I tried to calm my racing thoughts. It wasn’t lost on me that I was more nervous about meeting an eleven-year-old boy than I was facing down a platoon of terrorists. Right as I got my heart rate under control, I saw Reagan talking to a little boy. Scratch that, the kid was no little boy, he was damn near as tall as her. When they turned to look at us, I had to suck in a breath. There was no denying that was my brother’s son.
Fuck.
It was like going back in time twenty-five-years and seeing Nick.
“Nolan, this is Nicholas,” Reagan introduced me when we approached.
“Nice to meet you, sir,” Nicholas said.
I was speechless; the resemblance was uncanny. Even the boy’s voice sounded like Nick’s.
Jesus Christ, Nicholas was my brother reincarnated.
Chapter Fifteen
Clark continued to stare at his nephew, and the boy started to shift uncomfortably under the scrutiny. I was getting ready to shake Clark out of his stupor when he finally spoke.
“Yeah. You too.” Then to the officer. “Is there anything I need to do before we leave?”
“No. Everything’s been taken care of. Nicholas will have a court-appointed lawyer. I’d expect a call in a few days to arrange a meeting to go over temporary custody.”
Thankfully nothing more was said about Stephanie or her charges in front of Nicholas. Officer Lander was spot on when he said that Nicholas had taken on the parental role. He knew way too much for an eleven-year-old. Clark was going to hit the roof when he found out this was not the first time Stephanie had been arrested, leaving Nicholas to go into foster care until she got out. From what little he’d said, it was normally for a few days.
“What do you say we get out of here? You hungry?” Clark asked.
“I’m fine.” He was lying. I’d heard the boy’s stomach rumble a few minutes ago. He’d pulled a granola bar out of the pocket of his pants and took one small bite before he wrapped it up and put it back.
Pants that were filthy and looked like they’d seen better days.
I hated Stephanie Clark.
“I’m starving. Mind if we pull through a Micky-D’s before we head back to Nolan’s place?” I asked, hoping that Clark would understand that Nicholas needed food.
“Thanks for all your help officer.” Clark turned to Landers and shook his hand.
“Have a good evening,” he replied.
I remain quiet on the walk to the Jeep. I wasn’t sure what was supposed to happen next.
“Hey, Nicholas?”
“Yes, ma’am.”
I couldn’t help but laugh.
“Kiddo, you don’t have to call me ma’am. I appreciate the show of respect. But you can call me Reagan or Rea. Whichever you prefer is cool with me. What I was going to ask you is if there was anything we forgot back there. A coat, a phone, tablet, anything?” It was odd that we’d left without any of his personal belongings. I didn’t know if eleven-year-old boys still had teddy bears, but surely he had something.
“No. I didn’t have anything in the car.”
If I thought Stephanie was a bitch before, now I thought she was a super bitch. Her child didn’t have a coat, but she’d found time to get plastered.
She was the very definition of a C-U-Next-Tuesday.
Clark’s teeth clenched, and he stalked toward his nephew, causing the younger boy to cower.
“A few things before we get home. Most important of those, I will never hurt you. I know you don’t know me, and have no reason to believe me, but mark this bud, no one will ever hurt you again. You never need to flinch away from me. I’m sorry I didn’t think to ask you this while we were still at the police station. Do you know who I am?”
Damn. Neither of us was very good at this kid thing.
“Yes, sir. You’re my Uncle Nolan,” he answered.
Clark studied him again, looking like he was a thousand miles away.
“Did your mom ever tell you that you look just like your dad?” Clark asked.
Oh shit.
“No. She never told me anything about him other than he was dead.”
Clark recoiled at Nicholas’ statement.
“Yeah. He is… umm… he died in a helicopter crash. Anyway, you look just like him. It’s actually spooky how much, you even have his crazy-cool eyes. One green, one half green half brown. You’re gonna have to bear with me a little if I keep staring at you. Honest to God I’ve never thought I’d see my brother again, but it’s like he’s standing in front of me.”
I may have been wrong, but I could’ve sworn I heard a hitch in Clark’s voice.
“Anyway. My friends call me Clark. I could imagine it would be a little weird if you called me that since it’s your last name, too. But you can call me Nolan, uncle, hey you, basically anything other than sir. As Reagan said, I appreciate the respect, but you’re my blood; you don’t have to call me sir.”
“Will you tell me about him? Mom got mad whenever I asked questions, so I stopped asking. She’d always get really upset and drink more than usual if I brought him up.”
“Sure. I can tell you about him sometime.”
Oh, dear God, this was going to gut Clark. After what I’d learned tonight I didn’t think Nick was his favorite person, Stephanie wasn’t either, and how the hell was he supposed to explain that Stephanie had been his wife, not Nick’s.
“So why don’t you tell me the last time you ate,” Clark asked.
“Other than the granola bar. A real meal,” I quickly added.
“Yesterday morning.”
“Christ. Alright, we’ll hit a drive-thru tonight since there’s nothing else open and we’ll get some real food in you starting tomorrow.”
“No. I’m fine really. I don’t want to be a bother.”
“Oh hell,” I muttered, and Nicholas looked at me. “You’re Nolan’s family, sweetie. Family is never a bother.”
“Come on. Let’s get in the car. It’s cold, and you don’t have a jacket.” Clark finished unlocking his Jeep.
I could tell by the tightness in his voice he hadn’t liked Nicholas’s comment any more than me.
We hit a drive-thru on the way home, and I ordered a bunch of food that I knew Clark-my-body-in -a-temple didn’t approve of, but the kid had to eat. There was no way Nicholas was going to bed hungry. Even if his belly was full of grease and empty calories – it was something.
I laid the food out on the dining room table, and Nicholas was giving a mound of fries side-long glances. I could practically see the saliva pooling in his mouth he wanted them
so bad.
“Hey, kiddo, dig in. Eat whatever you want, as much as you want. I think my eyes are bigger than my stomach. I can’t eat all of it on my own.” Then I turned to Clark. “Nolan, can you help me?” I asked and walked down the hall.
Leaving the room was two-fold. I wanted Nicholas to feel free to eat, and I didn’t think he’d do it while Clark and I watched. The other reason was I needed to talk to Clark in private.
“What’s wrong?” he asked when we stepped into his bedroom.
“Nothing, other than the obvious. I actually wanted to check on you. This can’t be easy.”
He opened his mouth to lie to me, I was sure of it. He thought better and clamped it shut, grinding his teeth.
“Right. That’s what I thought. You need to take a minute to yourself. Go out front and have a smoke and get your thoughts together. I got Nicholas.”
“I don’t smoke in front of kids…”
“That’s why I said out front. We won’t be able to see you.” I cut him off. “I don’t mean to overstep, but he needs clothes. I’m supposed to help Emily tomorrow. Are you okay with me taking Nicholas with us? I’ll hit the mall and pick him up some stuff.”
“Christ,” he said and ran his hand through his short-cropped hair. “I don’t know what to do with a kid.”
That admission took a lot out of Clark. He was used to being in complete control of his surroundings. He was so far out of his element it wasn’t even funny. Hell, I was too.
“You’ll figure it out. He’s eleven, not two. At least he can wipe his own ass; I hear that stage is… yucky.” I smiled, trying to interject something other than seriousness.
“I’d appreciate you taking him. I’ll have to talk to the Commander tomorrow, and the team. I’m not sure what this will mean for me.”
“Plenty of people have kids in the military. You’ll work it out.”
“No doubt about that. I’ll leave the 707 before I allow my nephew to go live with strangers because of my job instability.”
I didn’t understand what the big deal was. But Clark seemed to think there was one, so I’d take him at his word. I knew nothing about his job or the military for that matter.
“You got this. I know you do. Give it a week, and the two of you will be best-buds.”
He chuckled and planted a kiss on my forehead that sent waves of electricity through my body. God, I loved when he touched me. It was going to totally suck when I had to leave. I could very easily get addicted to him. Who the hell was I lying to? I already was.
“Thank you. I couldn’t have gotten through tonight without you.”
“You would’ve, but you’re welcome. Go take your time out, and I’m gonna talk to the kid. Feel him out a little and find out who his favorite band is. But you have to know, if you take too long, I’ll have him over to the dark side listening to Tay-Tay.”
Clark laughed a full belly laugh, and my heart soared.
I did that.
Fuck yeah!
“I’ll be quick.”
I stayed where I was for a minute and heard him mumble something to Nicholas, then the door shut. When I got back to the table, Nicholas had eaten one of the chicken sandwiches and was shoving a handful of fries in his mouth.
He was starving.
Not bothering to stop by the table, I walked to the fridge and opened it.
“Orange juice, almond milk – gross by the way, or water?” I asked.
“I’m fine,” he answered.
I glanced at him, and he was looking at me like he had something to say. I decided not to say anything and wait him out. Instead, I pulled out two bottles of water and sat them at the table, placing one in front of him.
My patience paid off. “Are you his girlfriend?”
Well, I’d thought it paid off, but that was not what I thought he was going to ask.
“Nope. We’re just friends. I live in Florida and Clark was nice enough to let me stay here.”
“Am I going to live here?”
Shit. Not only did I not know the answer to that, but I was also not the person to be talking to him about family stuff.
“Do you want to?” I asked, instead of answering.
“Yes. No. I don’t know. It’s better than a group home or staying with strangers.”
“I can understand that.”
I couldn’t. I’d never been in foster care or a group home.
“Who will take care of my mom if I stay here?”
Stupid bitch!
“She’ll take care of herself, sweetie. Your uncle will work that out.”
“She can’t. I have to.”
“If you take care of her, then who takes care of you?” I asked, gently afraid of the answer.
“I do.”
That’s what I thought he was going to say. Eleven, and he was taking care of himself. Disgraceful.
“You don’t have to worry about that anymore. Clark will handle everything.”
“But mom said that he didn’t like me; that’s why he never came around.”
“She lied,” I told him, then almost instantly regretted my words. “What I mean is, Clark didn’t know about you.” I smiled at him. “Nicholas, I want you to listen to me. If your uncle knew about you, you would’ve known him. There would’ve been nothing that would’ve kept you from him. I promise you that’s the truth.”
“Bud?” Clark said from across the room, startling us both. I hadn’t heard him come in and I was pretty sure neither had Nicholas. “There’s a lot that you’re too young to know; some I will never tell you, and some I will explain when you’re older. One thing I can tell you now is this – the last time I saw your mom was the last time I spoke to her, and she did not tell me she was pregnant with you. I’m sorry that I didn’t know.”
Nicholas didn’t say anything, but he had understood what Clark said and was mulling it over.
“Do you want me to live here?” Nicolas asked.
“Yes.” Clark’s answer was strong and resolute, leaving no room for doubt. “We’ll work things out together. When the lawyer calls, we will meet with her together. Me and you. One step at a time. Rea is going to take you to the mall tomorrow to pick you up some clothes. Are you okay going with her and our friend Emily?”
“Yeah. But the Goodwill is fine.”
I was all for the Goodwill. I loved second-hand shops. I always found killer deals there, but anger was bubbling up. Stephanie could keep herself in liquor yet wouldn’t spot for a new pair of jeans for her boy. That was jacked. Big time.
“We will for sure hit some consignment shops and the Goodwill, too. But you’re gonna need some shoes and some other stuff that the mall will be better for.”
“Okay. If it’s not too much trouble.”
I stood and ruffled his mop of brown hair then replaced my hand with a quick kiss. “No trouble at all. It will be fun. Your uncle is at work all day, and I get bored. It’ll be cool to hang out with you.”
“I’m going to get myself out of the guest room. Is it cool if I put my bag in your room?” I asked Clark when I walked by.
“Absolutely.”
I made quick work cleaning up the room I’d stayed in and dumped my stuff in Clark’s room. After I told the men it was ready for Nicholas, and I was going to wash up for bed, I used Clark’s master bathroom to wash my face and brush all the french fry grease from my mouth. I was pulling on a pair of sweatpants when Clark walked in. No, he didn’t walk, he prowled toward me and without a word his hands were in my hair and his mouth was on mine.
He pushed us back into the bathroom, keeping a tight hold on my hair. I was impressed when he shut and locked the door, shoved my sweats down, and placed me on the countertop - all without breaking the kiss. The zipper of his pants rasped, and I opened my legs to give him more room. He stepped closer and stopped.
“Are you on birth control?” he asked, then licked the shell around my ear.
“Yeah.”
My answer had barely been verbalized before
he pushed his dick inside of me, bottoming out. I didn’t have time to catch my breath before his lips were back and he’d set a furious pace.
I wasn’t sure where his desperation came from, and I didn’t care. He’d quickly built a raging inferno, and I was eager for the explosion that was just out of reach. I tilted my hips and the added friction was exactly what I needed. Clark swallowed my cries and joined me in all-consuming pleasure.
When he brought his gaze up to meet mine, my heart nearly broke. He didn’t try and mask his pain. There in his bathroom he gave me the greatest gift – his truth. He didn’t hide anything, nothing was withheld as he stared into my eyes. I didn’t need him to tell me with words that finding out his brother had a son was killing him. Knowing Nicholas pretty much had a shit life was going to eat at him. How could it not?
Clark gently cleaned me and carried me to his bed, setting me on the side. I scrambled back and used my oversized shirt to cover my lady bits.
“Should I sleep on the couch?” I asked.
Before the drama with Stephanie, we hadn’t exactly firmed up sleeping arrangements, and now there was a child in the house.
“No. I want you in my bed.”
I didn’t think that was the best idea, but his answer didn’t leave much room for argument. Sleeping next to him seemed more like a relationship than fuck-buddies.
“Alright.” I agreed and moved over.
He settled in and pulled me close, cuddling his front to my back, spooning.
“If you feel me moving or starting to have a nightmare, promise me you won’t touch me, and you’ll get out of bed.”
“I promise.”
“Night, baby.”
Baby? Sweet Jesus I was never going to recover.
“Good night, Nolan.”
I love you was on the tip of my tongue. Not completely, but dangerously close.
Chapter Sixteen
My hard-on was throbbing on Reagan’s naked ass, and I was using ample amounts of self-control not to take her. After I’d awoken and the memories of last night flooded my mind, I couldn’t do it. I’d taken her on the counter of my bathroom roughly and without thought of how she would feel about it. It was a dick move, and to make matters worse, I did it without a condom. I knew I was clean, and I wasn’t worried about her medical history - more her mental care. I hadn’t even asked, I took.
Freedom: A Black Ops Romance (The 707 Freedom Series Book 4) Page 11