by G. Bailey
"Sure, I’ll see you later, Allie," she says, smiling at Allie who looks at me for a second before smiling at Maisy.
"Okay, see you in class. Have fun with your boyfriend." She smirks when Maisy’s cheeks go even redder.
"He's not my boyfriend," she says quietly, looking anywhere but at me.
I grab her hand, interlocking her fingers with mine.
"Not yet, but you will be," I say cockily, taking a chance and hoping she will say maybe. She looks up at me, seemingly searching for something, and I know already I would give her anything she asks.
"How do you know I will be?" Her face is just curious now as she talks.
"I'm good at guessing." I shrug.
She giggles before saying, "Let's go and get lunch, Sebby." She tugs on my hand as we walk to the lunch hall. I grin at the nickname, knowing I like hearing her say it.
Maisy didn't say no, and when I ask her to be my girlfriend a month later, she gives me my first kiss and says yes.
I wake up from that memory in my dreams before remembering everything that happened yesterday. What a complete fuck-up. A father, I'm going to be a fucking father. I can't believe it, and it's with Maisy. The girl I dreamed of having it all with before I fucked up, maybe this is the wake-up call I’ve needed for a long-ass time. I need to sort my shit out.
I shake my head to get her out of my thoughts and check the time on my phone. It’s seven in the morning, and I haven't slept all night. I came straight back from seeing Maisy and went to bed to avoid my worried family and their questions. My brothers and Izzy tried to talk to me, but I couldn't give them the answers they needed without thinking. A night of restless sleep didn’t give me any answers, except one. I’m going to get my girl back and have the family I’ve always wanted with her.
I have three months until l I meet my son, and I need a fucking, good game plan, which starts with a home. Maisy and my son need a home, and I'm going to buy one. I have fuck loads of money, which means nothing without her. I learnt that the hard way the last few months. I inherited well over one million when I turned sixteen, and I haven't touched it other than to drink myself to death. Now, the reason I want to spend it is a decent one. I need to fix all my mistakes the best I can and take care of my new responsibilities.
My gaze goes around my blue-and-black-themed room, my massive bed takes up most of it, with a TV in the corner on the wall and two bookcases next to it. They are filled with books. I spend way too much time reading, not that anyone other than Maisy knew about my secret hobby. My wardrobe is huge and filled with a stupid amount of clothes, I know I will be donating a lot to a charity soon. I grab my laptop out of my bedside unit and switch it on as I make my bed.
I open my laptop and spend hours looking at houses nearby. I don’t want to be too far away from my family as I’m going to need them, but I finally choose three to look at. I book appointments this Monday to view them and ponder how I’m going to get Maisy to see them with me. I know she is the most stubborn woman I’ve met, and I can’t use sex to get her to agree with me like I used to. Fuck, I’m going to have to ask for help.
I hop into the shower, and then dress in a black hoodie, blue top, and jeans before making myself go downstairs to face the music.
Izzy is sitting in the kitchen drinking water, and she is wearing a blue dress, which I helped her buy, and black leggings. Her green eyes latch onto mine, and she puts down her drink and runs to me, pulling me into a massive hug. For someone so damn small, she can hug tightly, but I swear she makes everything better. My sister is awesome, like the mother I never had, I guess. I never thought I needed women in my life after Maisy went, but Izzy is different to have around.
"Are you okay?" She searches my eyes while sitting back down on a stool, facing me.
"I don't know," I say honestly while getting a bottle of water out of the fridge.
"I’ll text the boys, we need a family chat, Sebastian," she says seriously with her worried gaze watching me like a hawk.
"Yeah, we do." I sigh, grabbing an apple out of the fruit bowl and leaning against one of the counters while taking a huge bite.
"You didn't know?" she enquires gently, there isn’t any accusation in her voice, which makes me relax rather than tense up.
"No," I say, and she nods at me. She trusts me not to lie to her, and I like that she doesn’t need to ask me again. I grab some cereal and start eating it out of the box. It's a bad habit–something I used to do as a kid–but I don't give a shit now.
"They are all in the gym, let’s go." She waves at me, and I put my stuff away before following.
I follow her down to the basement, which has been converted into a gym, and all of my brothers glance up when I walk in. The music is blasting as Elliot continues punching the crap out of a punching bag, and Luke is running on a treadmill. Harley is lifting weights, which is what I would usually be doing now if I didn’t need to sort my shit out.
There are a few sofas next to a bar in here, too, and I walk over to the bar stools with Izzy. My brothers sit on the couches after Harley uses a remote to switch the speakers off.
"So, congratulations, Daddy," Luke says with a grin, always the smartass.
"Shut up, Luke," Izzy says with a playful groan, glaring at him.
"Right, just to start with, are you going to be there for this baby?" Harley asks, starting the serious conversation. Harley is watching me with a degree of calm, and I know if I say no his anger will spike, and it’s likely he will enjoy telling me how fucked-up I am.
"Yes, of course I fucking am. We discussed this last night. I have my work cut out for me as she doesn't trust me, but she won't stop me from being in my baby’s life." My words are clipped and more defensive than I should have made them. While Elliot won’t look at me, Luke nods with a big smile.
"Good. Have you thought about how you’re going to cope with a baby and uni?" Harley asks, drawing my stare back to him. I’m meant to be at university now, and I’ve missed a load of classes since I started, anyway. I’m just not interested in the course, and I’m not sure why I even bothered getting in, it’s a waste of money for me.
"Not yet, I'm looking at buying a house and moving Maisy in.” Luke frowns, he’s about to say something but I carry on speaking. “Look, her parents are crazy, and she can't get out without my help, but she is too damn stubborn to accept my help. What do I do?" I ask.
"You’re moving out?" Elliot asks, bestowing me a look full of judgement.
“Yes,” I answer.
“Another fucking, irresponsible act. You’re fucking eighteen, and this girl has fucked with you enough. Don’t leave your family to live with her. You can move her in here,” Elliot says, and I clench my fists so I won’t punch my twin. I love the fucker, but he doesn’t understand feelings or what it’s like with Maisy. Hell, he never fucking did.
"I don't think she will let me live with her, but I hope, in time, we can sort us out. You know I love her, bro. I never stopped, but I fucked up in more ways than one." I look away from Elliot as I don’t want to hear his opinion on me being irresponsible. Fuck, I know I was.
"If she loves you, it will work out," Izzy says with a kind smile.
"What did you do?" Luke asks, leaning back in his seat.
"I really fucked-up, end of story," I say, making sure my tone tells them I don't want to discuss it. It's a long story, and I need to fix things with Maisy before anyone knows. The last thing she needs is my family to pity her, or for her to hate me more for telling anyone.
“I agree about the house, and you need to persuade her to move in. We need to sort out these last fights we owe. You can't fight now, so we’ll sort something out with your next fight.” Harley pauses to rub his face. “Your family needs you, and Maisy doesn't know about your fighting, does she? She would freak if you come back like that."
I grimace at his words. I used to just stay home and not see her when I had big fights before, and it was easy to say I was ill around once a month, but now
I can’t leave her.
"I can fight. I can't just leave you guys to do it." I shake my head. I'll just have to tell her, but how the fuck do I bring my fucked-up life up?
"It's final, you’re not fighting, Seb, and also, no more partying or girls. Maisy won't like that, and you need to be responsible," Harley says, and he is right. When Maisy called me out on my man-whore ways last night, I have never felt so shitty in my whole life. I guess I convinced myself she was off with another man by now.
It will be so much worse when she finds out about Elena. I shudder, realising I need to tell her about that, but it will start the conversation about how we broke up. I’m not sure I can handle the anger covering her features when I’m near, my heart can’t handle that when I need to talk with her. How did this get so complicated? Oh yeah, I’m a fucking idiot.
I put my hands over my face and rub it.
"I realise my behaviour recently was fucked up, and, honestly, I feel like shit. I hurt her, I know that," I tell my family. We have been through so much, I know I can trust them to help me with Maisy.
"You weren't together, and you were upset with her leaving," Luke says gently, trying to give me an out I don’t want.
"Yeah, but that’s no excuse. While I was having fun, she was pregnant and alone. I'm a real prick," I tell him.
"No, you’re not. You didn't know, but I could see how sad you were. All that was done in sadness, you never really cared about any of the girls or the parties," Izzy says and gives me a pat on my back.
"You’re right. I never cared, and I don't remember most of it. It was all nothing compared to her." I drop my head as I try to think about what I need to do.
"Then you need to win her back," Izzy says with a smile as I look at her.
"She hates me, and with good reason," I tell her.
"No, she doesn't, Seb. I saw the way she looked at you. The way–" I cut her off by saying.
"She hates me, and what’s worse is that she doesn't trust me. She thought I knew because someone texted her off my phone telling her to get rid of the baby," I tell them all, and I watch as Harley’s face contorts in anger. Luke is the same, and Elliot is looking away, but I notice his fist clench slightly.
"Who would do that?” Harley spits out.
"No idea. I was a mess at the time she said she had messaged me. I was with a few different girls every night." I look away from the pitiful looks on my brothers’ faces.
"Do you think it could be a jealous one night stand you had?" Izzy asks.
"Maybe." I stand up and pace next to the bar.
"Maisy invited me to a scan next week. That's a good sign, right?" I ask with a small smile, feeling the excitement of seeing my child. My thoughts flicker to the scan photo I saw last night, I couldn’t make out much other than a head shape and maybe an arm, but, man, it hurt my heart. I know I will do absolutely anything for the little man already.
"Yeah, man," Luke says, nodding at me.
I notice he has a new tattoo on his wrist that’s covered up. Luke is covered in tattoos all over his arms and his back. He designs them himself, and he has done mine too. Luke is the youngest and the only one of us brave enough to start growing a beard, the thought makes me grin internally.
"Make sure you bring me a picture of my niece or nephew," Izzy says with excited eyes, which make me smile and bring me back to the present.
"He's a boy," I tell them and watch as Izzy’s face lights up.
"Congratulations," my oldest brother, my guardian, and, hell, the only man I’ve ever looked up to, says with a big smile. Harley has shoulder-length, brown hair, which is slightly longer than mine. He is taller than all of us, and I wouldn’t like to admit it, but the fucker is likely the strongest fighter of us all, too.
"Yeah, man. I have no idea about babies and that, but I’ll be there to help," Luke says with a small laugh as I nod my thanks.
I look over at Elliot, who is saying nothing at first. "Are you sure it's even fucking yours, Seb?" is all he says.
I see red, and I’m in front of my twin without realising I had moved, who stands eye-to-eye with me. My twin, who looks very little like me; Elliot has wavy, black hair that curls around his face, unlike my very short, dark-brown hair. We are the same height, but Elliot prefers to look like a biker kid, in fucking black leather all the time.
"Of course it fucking is. We were together five, fucking, years, and she wasn't with anyone else. I would have known," I tell him with a glare.
“Like you knew she was pregnant, Seb,” he taunts, and I feel Harley push me back behind him as he stands in between us both.
“Elliot, go and cool down,” Harley warns.
"Congrats," Elliot says to me, his word dripping with sarcasm, as Harley moves away and he storms out of the room. The door bangs as I rub my temples to help with the stress of the situation. Fuck, I have no idea what to do, and arguing with him isn’t going to bloody help.
"The fight is tonight. Luke's on, are you coming?" Harley says while walking over to a worried Izzy. He talks quietly to her, and she seems to relax at whatever he says, which I can’t hear.
"Yeah," I say.
"I'm off to see Blake, and I'm staying over tonight. So good luck tonight, and message me when it's over," Izzy says to us, hugging us all before leaving.
I feel my phone buzz in my pocket as I sit next to Luke, who has his tablet out and is playing some farming game.
Elena: you want to hang tonight? xxxx
Even seeing her name, I know I have to get her out of my life. Maisy will never forgive me for the mistake of being with Elena, but Maisy seeing me around Elena . . . well, I know she will leave me. It's not like I really like Elena anyway, which makes me a fucking prick for even thinking it. She was just a way to get back at Maisy because she left me, and then, after that, she was always around. It was always easy.
That makes me sound like a tosser, and I know I am. It felt like my whole world had ended. I always wanted a second chance, and now, with just one look in those brown eyes, I know I have a small chance.
Me: no, sorry. Look I have a lot going on at the moment. I don't think we should see each other anymore. I'm sorry
She replies quickly.
Elena: what's going on? I'm your friend, I don't see why I can't be around you xxx
Me: I can't be friends with you. Look, find someone that deserves you.
I think that sounds like a nice way to tell her to find someone else. She really needs to because, hell, I was sleeping with different girls when she was always around, and no one deserves that.
Elena: are you serious? We have been fucking for months and you’re just going to drop me? You can't do that!
Me: I am sorry
Elena: you will come back to me. Whoever she is, it won't last long xxx
Me: you need to forget me and delete my number
I push my phone into my pocket and go to change before joining Luke and Harley for their workouts. Around an hour later, we all eat but don’t talk anymore about Maisy, which leaves me enough time to think. I spend the next few hours getting ready for the fight with Luke. I’m not too worried as I know his opponent is slow, and Luke’s trick is he is so fucking fast that you don’t see it coming until you’re flat-out on your back.
It's nine P.M., and we are driving to the fight. I can't help myself, and I text Maisy as Luke drives. He smiles a knowing smirk before looking back at the road. I want to smile back, but all of Luke’s fights make me so fucking nervous, I just want to take the fight off of him. I look past my mirror as Elliot drives past on his motorbike; the damn thing is massive and fucking loud.
Me: how are you today? Were your parents all right with you? X
She doesn't reply right away, but I expect that. I start looking up pregnancy at six months on my phone. Most of it isn’t too bad, but I'm scared by the end of my reading. Cravings, backache, and something fucking weird called Braxton-Hicks seem the weirdest and scariest stuff. I haven’t even made it to the bir
th part of the page I’m reading.
I need to buy some pregnancy books, and then when I have the house I want, I can get lots of baby stuff. Hopefully with Izzy, as I have no idea what to buy and I have a funny feeling Maisy isn’t going to like me spending a lot of money. The only good thing is, I can buy a dozen outfits for my little man.
We exit the car and walk into The Cage twenty minutes later without talking. Luke goes off backstage to get ready, and I order a beer at the bar with Elliot. The ‘stubborn bastard,’ as I like to call him, hasn't said anything to me yet. I can tell he is thinking about everything, and I know it’s more to do with his insane fear of any change in his life. I smirk internally, thinking back to how well he took finding out about Izzy and her coming to live with us.
We may be twins, but we aren’t as close as I am to my other brothers. I don’t blame Elliot for our fucking upbringing, but Elliot became more distant as we grew older, until today, where he barely talks to us about anything.
"Seb, about earlier. I was in a shit mood,” Elliot says, which shocks me enough to wait for him to talk some more. “Fucking hell, Lily broke up with me."
I glance at Elliot as he talks, his jaw tenses, and I don’t know how I didn’t notice that he hasn’t shaved today. Actually, it looks like he only bothered to dress, and he hasn’t sorted his messy, black hair out. Man, does no one in this family give a shit about how they look other than me?
"Shit, bro, I’m sorry. Did she say why?" I ask. I knew things weren’t good between them recently, not from the sound of the fights I’ve overheard at least.
"Lily said she loves someone else and wants to be with him. Fuck it, I’m glad I don't love her, but I still want to find out who it is and kick the living shit out of them." He clenches his beer so tight in his hand, I’m surprised it doesn’t smash.
"Damn. She isn't worth it," I say, patting his back, and I know she really isn't.
Elliot doesn't love her, and I’m glad he actually knows that. I know she was more of a distraction from who he really wants. I glance at my brother and wonder if he would ever do or say anything to her, but I know how he feels about Allie. Allie is Izzy’s best friend, and she used to be Maisy’s, too. I have to admit, she is stunning and kind of crazy, but I wouldn’t ever touch her. Shit, most guys I know wouldn’t, in case Elliot finds out. I know she feels the same way, but the two of them are equally stubborn. The tension in the room is unreal whenever they have to be around one another.