by Rhonda James
“I’m sorry. I’m not following. How do I ‘look at you’?” I might or might not have rolled my eyes as I said this.
“You know,” he teased, tickling my side with the tips of his magical fingers until I begged for mercy. “You look up at me with love in your eyes.” He batted those beautiful lashes at me. Still teasing. Not to mention that when he said it, the word ‘love’ came out all goofy and drawn out—sounding more like lurve.
“Oh. My. God.” I poked him in the side. “I do not look at you with lurve in my eyes.” I tried pushing away, but his arms tightened and he rolled, pinning me beneath him. “Okay, fine. I’ll admit to lust being present, but nothing else because that would be ridiculous. I mean—who does that after only three weeks? Crazy people, that’s who.” I kept babbling until he brought a finger to my lips and silenced me.
“Relax, V. I was just messing with you, so stop freaking out. But what I said is true. She’d love you because you make me want to be a better man. You’re good for me, Victoria Prescott.”
Stunned silent. That’s what he’d done to me. I wasn’t sure how to interpret the meaning behind his words. Was he implying there might be something more going on between us? That what we were doing might continue after the list was complete?
He dipped his chin until our eyes met, and a smile tugged at the right side of his face. “You know, you’re really cute when you’re nervous.”
“That so?” I wrinkled my nose.
“Very.” He dropped a kiss on the tip of my nose. “Very.” Soft kisses dotted the corners of my parted mouth. “So,” he finished, claiming my mouth in a fiery kiss.
His arousal lay thick between us, trapped behind layers of clothing. Bad clothing. I tugged at the waistband of his gym shorts, but he grasped my wrist and shook his head.
“Tsk. Tsk. Tsk,” he pouted, still shaking his head. “The rules say no sex after porn. Remember?”
“It’s after midnight,” I answered, fingers wiggling as I wrestled from his grip and palmed his erection.
His gaze flitted to the clock on the nightstand. “Loophole?”
I smiled and slowly nodded my head. “Uh huh. Besides, I’m the one who made that crazy rule.”
“So crazy.” He wedged a knee between us, encouraging me to spread my legs. Next, he grasped the hem of my tank and pulled it over my head, then gazed down at my nakedness. The intensity in his eyes was intimidating.
I continued rambling, “Fitting, though, considering whenever I’m with you, I feel a little like Alice in Wonderland where she fell down the rabbit hole.”
“How’s that?” He palmed my breast, drawing the nipple between his teeth, teasing with the tip of his tongue until my eyes rolled back in my head.
“Everything about you makes my head spin. Right is left, and wrong is right. You know? Nothing seems to make sense, yet everything feels so…perfect,” I whispered.
He cradled my face with his hands and gazed down at me. His chest heaved, and I could hear his heart hammering above me. Thump. Thump. Thump. My insides went to mush, and I felt my lips part. Unspoken words dying to be given a voice. God, he was so beautiful.
Sin stroked the pad of his thumb across my cheek as his lips twitched, trying to form a sentence. “Victoria, I…” He trailed off as his eyes closed, a pained expression marring his beautiful face. A few seconds later, his eyes opened and he leaned across the bed and started rummaging through the nightstand.
My girly bits tingled—assuming he would come back with a condom. He was taking too long and the weight of his firm cock pressing against my belly made me want to scream at him to forget the damn condom and take me bare. That’s how crazy he made me. Imagine my surprise when came back holding something entirely unexpected.
A felt-tip marker.
“What exactly are you planning to do with that?” I asked, unable to hide the disappointment on my face.
A devilish smile took the place of his earlier expression, and he rose to his knees, still hovering over me. “Don’t look so disappointed, baby.” He raised the marker to his mouth and removed the cap. With the cap between his teeth, he asked, “Do you trust me?”
“Yes,” I said without hesitation.
“Close your eyes for me.” I did as instructed.
He spent the next few minutes leaning over me, writing messages on my body. I had no idea what he was writing, and my desire intensified with every painstaking press of his pen against my flesh. Closing my eyes made the experience strangely erotic. His warm breath tickled my skin as he leaned in, taking time with each letter marking my body. I had no idea where this was going, but I saw the lust behind his eyes when he’d asked me if I trusted him. Of course I trusted him. I trusted him with my body. Trusted he would make sure that I never walked away unsatisfied. I trusted him with my life. Because the way he looked at me earlier said more than words could ever reveal.
When he finished, he sat back, resting on his heels, and smiled a smug smile.
“I want to see.” I squirmed until he patted me on the butt, nudging me off the bed. I scrambled across the blankets and darted into the bathroom to have a look in the mirror.
“Babe, hurry back so we can get started on #18,” he commanded from the other room.
I turned on the vanity light and leaned in to read the directions he’d imprinted on my flesh.
On my bottom lip, in the tiniest of letters, he’d printed KISS ME.
A little lower, following the curve of my areola, were the words SUCK ME.
My pulse throbbed between my legs when I read what he’d written above my pussy EAT ME.
But there was one message left. I turned around slowly; peering over my shoulder to see the words I already knew would be there. A small part of me feared what was written, but a deeper defining part relished the idea of what those words suggested.
In black ink, above the crack of my ass, in big block letters… FUCK ME.
I stared at my reflection, reading the words one more time while my knees trembled and my body tingled with giddy excitement. Sin was the only man I’d let anywhere near my backdoor—but that had only been a finger. His dick was SO much bigger. Despite that ‘not so minor’ detail, I’d come too far on my journey to change my life—no chance in hell I was going to chicken out now.
Holy. Moly.
CHAPTER 21
SIN
“Hey, man,” I greeted Hawk on my way to the fridge. I reached inside and grabbed a bottle of water for myself before tossing one his way. “I didn’t think anyone else would be up at this hour.”
“You actually expect me to sleep with all the fucking going on up there?” He twisted the cap off and tossed it at my head, missing me by an inch. “Smug bastard.”
“Jealous?” I smirked.
“Little bit. Yeah,” he admitted.
It was the middle of the night, and V was upstairs sleeping in my bed. I’d spent the last two hours fulfilling every command I’d written on her beautiful body. The last one had taken a little more time, and a lot of lube, but in the end, it had been totally worth it. So fucking tight and warm. Goddamn, being inside her was like an out-of-body experience. Sliding inside, knowing I was the first to ever claim that part of her body… The trust she’d placed in me made me feel both powerful and terrified. I wanted to ravage her sexy body, punish her pussy until she couldn’t walk straight, while at the same time I wanted to protect her. Hold her in my arms where I knew she’d always be safe. I’d never felt that way about anyone. A part of me wanted to tell her how I felt, and I almost had, but then I’d remembered that in a matter of days, our time together would come to an end and she’d be gone. So, I’d stopped myself before I said too much.
I’d probably just gotten caught up in the moment. We’d been talking about my mom, and that shit always made me emotional. I missed the hell out of my mom. Wished she could see me today. Wished she could meet V. But wishing was for pussies, so…
“Sorry about that,” I answered smugly, not feeling th
e least bit guilty.
“Eh, don’t be. At least one of us is having sex at the moment,” he lamented, raising the bottle to his lips to take a sip. “So, this thing between you and Tori… You two getting serious, or is this just about two people fucking each other’s brains out?”
I took a seat at the table and released a heavy sigh. Hawk had been my best friend for more than ten years. There was no one else on earth I trusted more. I knew he’d listen to whatever I told him and not pass judgment or mock me. Hawk was a good soul and the most loyal person I’d ever known.
“I don’t know, man. This whole back and forth between us has been taking place for a long time. Something’s happening; I’m just not sure what it is or if I’m even ready to voice it. Then again, maybe I’m the only one feeling it.”
He flashed a hint of a smile. “Trust me, dude. You’re not the only one.”
I leaned my elbows on the table and dropped my head into my hands. Tired. I was fucking tired. But not tired of fucking.
“I don’t know what I’m supposed to do with that. I’ve never had feelings for a girl before. At least not anything like this. And she’s getting ready to go back home.”
“What about her list?” he asked.
Despite him having seen the list, we hadn’t really spoken about the details V and I had agreed to.
“The plan was for her to complete the list before her twenty-second birthday,” I started.
“Yeah, so?”
“Her birthday is Saturday. The list will be complete by then. After that, she’ll head back to South Carolina to celebrate with her parents.” I shrugged.
He slapped his palm against the table. “Fuck that noise! We’ll throw her a fucking birthday bash. I’m gonna talk to Blade and line something up. Don’t worry, buddy. I got your back.” We bumped knuckles before standing and doing that manly hug thing where we thump one another on the back and quickly move away.
“Listen, Hawk. Thanks for listening to my pansy ass go on and on.” I winced. “It’s been a strange month, definitely not what I expected when we left to come here.”
“There’s nothing pansy about love, my friend. Bigger men have fallen and survived to tell about it.” He clapped me on the shoulder.
I furrowed a brow. “I never said anything about being in love.”
“Didn’t have to. I know you. In all the years we’ve known one another, you’ve never been like this.” He waved his hand over me before pointing to the ceiling. “Same girl night after night. That’s not your style. What you two are doing goes way beyond lust or any list that girl dreamed up. The way you look at her tells me everything I need to know,” He winked. “In case you’re wondering, she looks at you the same way.”
Love? Did he really think I was in love with Victoria? Impossible. We’d only been around each other a few short weeks. Yeah, I had spent all those years picturing her body while I was getting off. And I might have quietly despised Michael for being the lucky son of a bitch to be her first. But love?
Was one month even enough time for someone to fall in love? Or were the first few months of every relationship really based on the sex even though they thought it was about being in love?
Now I was more confused than ever.
“You’re doing that thing you do,” Hawk observed.
“What thing would that be?” I snapped.
He wagged a finger in front of my face until I slapped it away. “That thing where you analyze everything to death. You gotta learn to sit back and let things happen naturally. You can’t fight what’s meant to be.” He stood and tossed his empty bottle in the trash. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I better get back up there and try to catch some z’s before you two start round six.”
“You’re just jealous because you’re not getting any,” I called as he was walking away.
“Fuck off, asshole.”
CHAPTER 22
V
My hands shook as I stared at Michael’s texts, trying my best to make sense of them.
Hey, baby. Thought I’d hear from you by now. You still mad about that night?
My bed misses you.
So do I.
When can I see you?
For him to reach out to me out of the blue the way he had… It didn’t sit well with me. I wasn’t sure how I was supposed to react. Was I supposed to laugh at his audacity? Or cry because I hadn’t missed him at all? Regardless of how badly things had ended between us, he had been a huge part of my life for many years.
I wasn’t sure what I should do about it. I had no intention of responding to them. And I sure as hell didn’t want to bring it up with Sin. We’d gone to great lengths to avoid talking about Michael. Period. It might not have been the best way to handle it, but I believed neither of us had been thinking about what would happen between us after the list was complete.
I was still pondering my predicament when my mom called. We hadn’t spoken since graduation, so she had no idea that I wasn’t in Tallahassee.
“Hi, Mom,” I greeted warmly. Despite my mother’s desire to dictate my love life, we’d always gotten along well.
“Darling, it’s so good to hear your voice. How are you? Are you safe?”
“I’m good. Why wouldn’t I be safe?” I let out a nervous laugh.
“Sarah spoke to Michael this afternoon, and he told her you’d left Tallahassee nearly four weeks ago. Now, where are you, because I know you’re not home,” she demanded.
“Well, I did go home, but then I left again.”
“Where on earth did you go?”
“Panama City.”
“Panama City? What ever possessed you to go there? Did Sophie go with you?” she inquired.
“No, Mom. But I didn’t come alone. I’m here with friends. What does it matter anyhow? I’m safe, and I’m having a great time,” I offered, hoping to appease her.
“Will you at least be home for your birthday? I was thinking we could do a spa day, just us girls,” she said hopefully. “Oh, and Daddy was going to get us a reservation at Bella Rue.”
“Yes, Mom. I’m planning on coming home the day after my birthday. Tell Daddy I love that idea, and the spa thing sounds like fun, too. I think I’ll be needing one after this trip,” I muttered, thinking of the beating my muscles had taken lately. No doubt about it, Sin had been giving me quite the workout.
But he’d never hear me complaining.
“Enough about me. Tell me about Africa.”
I spent the next twenty minutes listening to all the details of their trip, and she would have kept going, but I cut her off with an excuse that someone needed my help. I hung up the phone feeling certain that Michael’s text hadn’t been that random after all.
After I got off the phone, I went for a long walk on the beach to clear my head. I knew that regardless of what happened with Sin and me, I had no intentions of rekindling any form of relationship with Michael. It hurt a little to accept that, but I knew it was for the best. I did believe that at one time he had cared for me, but then he changed. I never could put my finger on it, but he would have these mood swings that made it hard for me to be around him because he made me uncomfortable. Looking back, maybe I should have confronted him about it. Maybe he’d been going through something and I never took the time to reach out to him. Something a friend should have done. Something a good friend would have done.
The other thing my walk helped me realize was that I needed to be honest with Sin about those texts. It might sound silly, but I didn’t want any secrets between us. Not after the way he’d opened up to me the other night. That night had been a turning point for us, in more ways than one.
“Hey, you,” Sin greeted me when I came through the door. He was leaning up against the kitchen counter, but when he saw me, he strode across the room and swept me off my feet.
“Hey, yourself,” I giggled as he spun me around and then brought his lips to mine for a kiss. “My, you certainly are happy today. I like seeing this side of you.”
&
nbsp; “I started writing again.” He grinned broadly.
“Oh my God! That’s amazing.” I wrapped my legs around his waist and covered his face in kisses. “I’m so freaking proud of you. We need to celebrate.”
The other night, he’d opened up and told me that he hadn’t been able to write since before he’d been sentenced to prison. I could only imagine how hard that time in his life had been. He didn’t like to talk about it, but he did tell me it was the only reason he was clean today. He said as bad as prison was, it had saved his life because without it, he probably would have died from an overdose or drug deal gone wrong.
“Well, it isn’t exactly finished, but it’s something, so I’m just going to keep working on it until I’m happy with it.” He turned and placed me on the counter then settled himself between my legs. “I want to play it for you when it’s ready.”
“Really? I’d love that.”
“It may be a few weeks, and you’re leaving—”
“I’ll come back,” I cut him off. “Just call, and I’ll be here.”
He titled his head and gazed longingly into my eyes. “You’d do that for me?”
I reached up and drew a finger across his forehead, brushing the hair out of his eyes. “Of course I would. I wouldn’t miss it for the world.”
“You’re pretty amazing, Victoria. Anyone ever tell you that?” He nibbled on my lips, preventing me from answering right away.
“Not that I can recall. Maybe I need to hear it again to refresh my memory,” I joked.
He kissed one cheek and then the other before bringing his mouth to mine. “You. Are. Amazing. Victoria. Prescott.”
I hummed against his lips. “Nope. You’re definitely the first.”
“Hmm. Another first. I can live with that.” He waggled his brows. “Hey, there’s something I’d like you to do for me.”
“Yes.”
“You don’t even know what it is yet.” He chuckled.
“I don’t care.” I pressed a kiss to his chin. “I love saying yes to you.”