“I’m willing to take that chance.” Roger decided to put everything on the line. He felt this could change everything. “Seriously, I’ve put a lot of thought into this. I’m asking you to dig deep inside. I think you have more control than you realize." He instantly flashed back to his wife. He'd said the same thing to her. "With everyone watching, I think you could withstand it.”
“Why would you want to take that chance?”
Roger needed to. "You asked me to stay. If I understand you correctly, you want my help to change the mindset of this camp. This is how we do it.”
Mace felt himself tingle from the idea. The thought of violence always had that effect.
“Just you and me in the training center,” Roger continued. “No weapons. The whole camp watching. I know what they respect and it’s a way to earn it.”
“By challenging me?” Mace said louder as his irritation grew. “I am the protector of this camp. How would it look for me to be challenged?” The darkness grew stronger and he felt the pull on his intestines.
“It’s not a challenge. There is no challenge.” Roger tried to explain. He needed Mace to understand.
“That’s exactly what it is!” Mace said as he moved closer to Roger.
Roger put his hands up defensively as he backed away. “It’s not a challenge. I swear. Just hear me out. They need to understand that they aren’t immune from defeat.”
“By watching you try to defeat me?” Mace felt the call of the machete strapped to his bike. He pictured a severed limb to start with. “You’d lose. I told you.”
“No. There would be no defeat. We’d be just acting. Consider it a demonstration. You said you wanted this camp to change. By holding on to your image as an unbeatable giant, you’re feeding their fantasies of indestructability. They need to have their eyes opened.”
“This conversation is done,” Mace said sternly.
“I may not be able to beat you in all things, but I could take you man-to-man if need be.” Roger followed Mace back to his bike. His heart pounded as he pushed himself right up to the edge. He believed it could work. He couldn’t let this go.
Mace took a deep breath. “I could kill you right now if I felt like it.”
“But you haven’t and I believe you won’t. You have more control than you realize. Just because you have thoughts to kill doesn’t mean you need to follow through. Show them you are capable of controlling yourself and they will do the same.”
Feeling like a pressure-cooker boiled inside, Mace questioned the purpose and logic of it. “Explain to me what good the two of us squaring off could possibly do for this camp?”
“It would teach the kids restraint. If we are able to show restraint and respect, then perhaps they will as well. It would also allow them to see you as more human than mythic. You are just shy of a god to them.”
Mace grew quiet for a second as he reflected on that. “They worship me for all the wrong reasons.”
“Yes, but they’re kids. We could still change that.”
Mace couldn’t believe he was actually considering it. “Say we do, what would be the outcome of this little sparring match? What comes after that?”
“We end it in a draw and I become Yin to your Yang. We balance this all out. Then we teach the kids to value life. To value their lives. We teach them to discover things in life that bring joy and happiness.”
Feeling like stone, Mace couldn’t even fathom the emotions.“I would do everything in my power to give them all a better life. But safety needs to remain our top priority. You teach them to value life and it could cost them theirs.”
“I don’t believe in raising sheep,” answered Roger. “I believe in raising thinkers. They understand the need for security. Let’s show them a life beyond that.”
Mace stayed silent as the words sifted through his head. “And you want me to fight you,” he said, staring bluntly at Roger. “I still don’t think you know what you're asking. Besides, what makes you think I won’t just kill you for the fun of it?”
“Because I believe that deep inside you are an honorable man and you're looking for redemption.” Roger held his breath after the last words. He’d promised he wouldn’t go there.
Mace’s eyes grew colder as he glared at him. As much as he wanted to kill him for ripping open that sore, he also knew he was right. “If you’re wrong, it will cost you your life.”
“I figure it would. But if you look at the number of kids here, and the fact that they’ve all received the antidote, then we are looking directly at the future of this camp, of this city, and perhaps even of this world. We have no way of knowing.”
“There is no future if we all die,” Mace replied, although Roger’s words continued to resonate.
“But what if we don’t all die? What comes next for them if all they know is violence and bloodshed? What kind of future are you looking at then? We could make them real leaders, Mace.”
Mace remained silent for a long time as he thought things through. Finally, he said ominously, “If I kill you in the training center, know I gave you fair warning.”
Jade was scrubbing Shawn with a wet sponge when Mace walked in. He seemed perplexed. “Where’s Jason?” he asked as he looked around. Jade could tell something was bothering him. “With Chelse. She’s teaching him to tend garden.” She stared at him for a few long seconds. “What wrong?”
“I’m going to fight Roger,” he confessed. “There’s a chance I might kill him.”
Jade’s heart skipped a beat. “What? What are you talking about?”
“It was his idea. He thinks if it goes right we could turn the camp. I’m just not sure it won’t go real fucking wrong.”
Not sure what to think, Jade questioned him further. “How is a fight going to turn the camp around? That seems ludicrous.”
“I don’t know how I let him talk me into it, but I did. It’s already been announced.”
“What?” Shawn grabbed the sponge in her hand and sucked on it. Jade pulled it out of his mouth and gaped back at Mace in shock. “When? You don’t have to go through with it.”
Shaking his head, Mace disagreed. “It’s too late. Woody’s in. It all goes down this afternoon.”
Jade stood up in disbelief. She handed Shawn to Mace and headed for the door. “Watch Shawn. I need to talk to Woody and Roger. This sounds crazy.” She left in a state of distress.
Mace was so disconnected from his family he wasn’t sure what to do. He tried to look warmly at his son. “Hi there, boy,” he said stiffly.
Shawn giggled as he gazed back at him. Mace completely surprised himself by smiling. Shawn giggled again and Mace lifted him up to eye level. As Shawn giggled harder, Mace suddenly tossed him high in the air, thinking he’d like it.
Shawn instantly wailed in fright as his arms and legs kicked out. Mace almost dropped him as he came back down, shrieking and squirming. Sitting down quickly, Mace coddled Shawn in his arms as the baby continued to scream. The sound burrowed into his brain, relentless and unyielding. Trying something different, Mace put him over his shoulder, rocking him gently back and forth. As Shawn finally started to calm down, Mace realized he never felt any anger towards his son, only relief as the crying ended. “I’ll be damned,” he said slowly to himself. “I’ll be damned.”
Jade returned twenty minutes later, scared of what she might find. She normally didn’t leave any of the kids alone with Mace.
“Hi J,” Mace said quietly as she entered. Shawn slept over his shoulder, thumb tucked securely in mouth. Her jaw dropped.
“He’s sleeping?” Shawn never slept soundly. Stunned, she looked at the peaceful look on Mace’s face. “What’s going on here? Are you okay?”
“I can do this,” he said incredulously. “I honestly think I can do this.”
“What happened?” Jade asked.
“I don’t know. It was the weirdest damn thing. I never got angry.”
Jade felt her heart flutter. Maybe there really was still hope. “I c
ouldn’t stop it. You were right. Both Woody and Roger seem convinced it could work.” She walked up and kissed Mace gently on the lips. “You can do this,” she said quietly. “I’m sorry I even doubted for a second. Maybe this will change everything.”
Sharing the moment, they both smiled at each other. Neither could remember the last time they'd experienced this type of connection with each other, or this feeling of hope. It felt long overdue.
"I love you, Mace," Jade said quietly, watching Shawn sleep peacefully in his arms.
"I love you, too," Mace replied. While he couldn't feel it in his heart, it still felt like the truth. They sat together for awhile in silence, the three of them. Mace and Jade simply stared at each other while Shawn dozed on his father's shoulder. The moment felt magical. For the first time in a long time, Mace felt close to human again.
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
Everyone gathered around the training area as Mace walked through the archway. Long winding vines climbed all the way up and around. The crowd cheered as he entered. Looking like an apocalyptic gladiator, he was shirtless, wearing nothing but tan shorts and boots. His muscles flexed as he gathered himself together. He needed to think of this as a performance, not a fight.
Woody sat on the roof to watch everyone’s reactions. A large circle etched in the dirt with a spear became their ring. Roger already waited inside, shirtless as well, feeling the effects of the hot Texas sun on his bare skin.
The boys heckled him as he waited. “You’re gonna get your head ripped off!” yelled one.
“Prepare to bleed,” laughed another.
Woody stood up to make the announcement.
Standing off to the side with Tom, Lisa thought it was a terrible idea. Nobody would listen. She wasn’t sure she could watch the outcome. Tom remained silent and stoned next to her, sure his death would follow shortly.
Chelsea, Maya and Kelly gathered behind them. They were all nervous, afraid the crowd would turn on Kelly and Tom after Roger got killed.
Woody suddenly cupped his hands together like a bullhorn. “We allowed strangers into our camp. They repaid us with thievery. Today one shall pay for their transgressions.”
The crowd cheered, eager to see the punishment rendered. Glancing at Woody and then at the reactions of the camp, Roger felt amazed by the amount of respect Woody commanded.
Mace cracked his neck a few times. “You ready?” he asked Roger as they came together.
Roger nodded and they bumped fists. They’d wrapped their hands in cloth strips to help soften the blows. “Let’s give them a show.”
Mace immediately fought the urge inside as the boys cheered him on. He could feel the excitement that came with the promise of violence. Jade watched nervously from the end of the training center. Standing off by herself, she held Shawn, who stirred fitfully on her shoulder. Jason stayed inside with Yvette. Jade didn’t want him to witness this.
“They want me to destroy you, you know,” Mace said with an anticipating smile as they slowly circled each other. The smile unnerved Roger.
“I believe you when you say you have control,” Roger answered seriously as he studied Mace’s face. “I’m betting our lives on it. This is the event that changes the camp. It all starts here.”
“I’m still going to enjoy making you bleed,” taunted Mace. He couldn’t hold back any longer and jabbed his fist into Roger’s face. Roger’s head briefly jerked back. The crowd roared. The feel of flesh felt good.
Roger smiled nervously back at the strike. “You’re pretty fast for being so bulky,” he said, wiggling his nose to assess the damage. “It’s my turn now. Keep it together.” Roger threw a right that caught Mace in the temple. The crowd booed. The hit felt inviting to Mace. The brief amount of pain felt intoxicating.
Mace smiled and countered with a jab and uppercut that briefly clouded Roger’s eyes as his head snapped back.
“Nice,” Roger said, as he shook his head. “You interested in seeing some legwork?”
Mace remained silent. The need grew stronger inside. He thought about stopping the demonstration.
Roger’s right leg suddenly left the ground and swept towards Mace in one fast, fluid motion. Roger’s foot nailed Mace squarely in the side of the head. The crowd booed as Mace stumbled to the side.
Mace felt something snap inside him and his mind went blank. He moved swiftly towards Roger. The crowd cheered at his forward progress.
“You're okay,” Roger said low as Mace swiftly approached. “It’s just a show,” he said loud enough for Mace to hear. “It’s the only way this will work.”
Mace didn’t stop. His eyes grew wide as he reached out with his left hand and grabbed Roger around the throat. Roger threw his forearm up, loosening Mace’s grip as Mace threw a roundhouse that landed directly on Roger’s temple. Roger’s eyes went fuzzy for a second before he gathered himself and thrust an open palmed shot straight to the bridge of Mace’s nose.
Mace stumbled backwards as blood poured from his nostrils.
Jade turned away, her heart pounding as she questioned the outcome. It could all go wrong so fast.
“You broke my nose!” Mace growled as he charged. Roger reacted swiftly and tried to use Mace’s progress against him. He tried to flip Mace, but Mace barrelled right through him, slamming Roger to the ground. Roger’s head bounced off the dirt and Mace was on top of him immediately.
Mace threw several hard punches at Roger’s face, and at the sight of blood the darkness took completely over. He needed to kill him.
Standing off to the side, Bowie suddenly tossed his knife right next to Mace. He wanted Roger gone.
Mace caught the blade out of the corner of his eye and quickly grabbed the handle. Roger saw the glint of shiny metal appear overhead and realized he’d been wrong. It was about to end badly.
Everything moved in slow motion as Mace raised the blade overhead and Roger prepared to divert the blade’s trajectory. Inside Mace’s head, a war raged. His whole being screamed at him to finish the task, to feel the release. As he began to plunge the knife towards Roger’s skull, Mace suddenly heard a voice from the past in his head. It was the last voice he ever expected to hear. It was the voice of Jason, the boy he once mentored. The boy he’d been forced to shoot and whom he'd named his son after.
“You’re going down, Mace. You’re going downtown.” The voice suddenly echoed throughout his brain. It was from the last time he’d seen Jason before the horrific event. It seemed like a different lifetime, when he was a better man and life still held hope.
They’d been playing a game at the mechanical museum in San Francisco. Mace pictured himself pulling the lever on the mechanical batter and the metal ball from Jason’s pitcher striking him out. Mace always let him win. It was nothing, but it was selfless. He'd loved to build the kid up. He'd loved him like a son.
Mace blinked as he felt the raging guilt wash over him. He’d become a monster.
His head suddenly grew clear and he witnessed Roger beneath him, trying to keep him off. The look on Roger’s face told of a life or death struggle. Mace suddenly realized the knife was gripped firmly in his hand and being thrust downward.
As the crowd roared around him, Mace felt the rage momentarily dissipate. Completely focused on it, the noise of the crowd disappeared. Back in his right mind, Mace heard Roger say, “Wait!” as Roger grabbed a hold of his wrist. Feeling Mace hold back as the blade moved towards his face, Roger twisted Mace’s wrist and rolled their bodies to the right. Mace tumbled over too easily and purposely loosened his grip. The knife dropped. Roger grabbed it and rolled on top of him. The blade pressed close to Mace’s throat.
Roger quickly glanced at the shocked faces all around them. The crowd appeared stunned and was instantly silent. “You okay?” he whispered.
“Get off me before I change my mind,” Mace said roughly as he fought to keep the darkness in check. The fight within still raged.
Roger let the knife drop to the ground. He slowly stood and br
ushed himself off. The crowd looked confused as Roger reached down for Mace’s hand. Mace clasped it and Roger helped him get to his feet.
Feeling the sting of his ego as he witnessed the crushed faces of the kids around him, Mace said quietly to Roger, “You broke my nose, you prick. You're lucky I didn’t finish you off.”
All the kids' mouths hung low as they stared at Mace’s bloody face.
Glancing at Mace, Roger saw a peaceful look in his eyes. It was the first time he’d ever seen it.
“It’s an improvement,” Roger said quietly, keeping his features tight. “Plus it goes with the scar. Chicks love scars.” The light scar that ran across Mace’s cheek was from a bullet-graze in San Francisco.
Mace and Roger stood quietly together, staring out at the stunned faces of the crowd. Mace suddenly grabbed Roger’s hand and lifted it above his head. They both held their hands up in victory.
“We’ll call this one a draw,” Mace said loudly as he watched Woody smile from the roof. “We’ll never know who could have won for sure,” he said, nodding towards Roger. “And we never will. We are going to live together in peace.”
Roger walked over to Bowie and handed him the knife. “I believe this is yours. It’s a beautiful weapon.”
Bowie took it and remained silent. He didn’t know what to say.
In the back of the crowd, Lisa trembled with a strange sense of joy. She clutched Tom’s hand tightly. Her nails dug into his palm. “I don’t believe it,” she said, unsure what to think. “Maybe we can beat this. Maybe we actually can.”
CHAPTER NINETEEN
Inside one of the barn stalls, Travis milked Betsy, their lone cow. Squatting down, he whistled as he squeezed down on two of the teats, squirting milk into a bucket. On the wall above him, Herman’s head twitched as he watched him intently. The lizard blended perfectly into the wood; its mottled skin-folds pressed against the beam. Travis never noticed it.
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