by C. J. Duggan
“The Mafia? Really?’ Toby shook his head.
“How come you didn’t give my family underworld status?” Stan asked, his expression surprisingly earnest.
“Come on, Stan. Look at Toby, all dark and broody, he could easily be linked to the mob, now if you were connected to the Irish mob, you would have been perfect.”
“Maybe next time.” I said. Stan seemed to have momentarily forgotten about Ellie and Wes, until she spoke.
“That was the funniest thing I have ever seen, can we hire you for all occasions?”
“Weddings and Bar Mitzvahs.” Sean nodded.
Ellie came over and hugged me. “We’re heading off now,” she whispered in my ear. I shot her a look that begged her not to, but she just winked at me, her mind made up.
“Might see you guys later.” She deliberately directed her speech away from Stan who had immediately soured again. Poor Stan.
This was one night I would not be waiting for Ellie. She made her own decisions so she could deal with the fallout. Wes took her hand and guided her out of the shed. The party atmosphere fizzled out as we all watched them leave.
Adam whispered in my ear. “So that’s okay with you, is it? Making everyone believe Sean and you are together?”
“Ellie is about to wander off into the dark with a stranger and you’re asking me about a mythical relationship? If it means Scott leaves me alone for the rest of my life, then Onslow is welcome to think I’m Sean’s girlfriend.’
I turned from Adam to walk over to Sean. I stood on my very tippy toes and, placing my hands on his shoulders, I kissed him on the cheek.
“Over the top, but thank you.”
Sean beamed a winning smile at me. “People talking about me and you? I don’t mind the thought of that one bit.”
The moment for appreciation was interrupted by a thunderous crack of the billiard balls as Toby broke with a shattering force.
“Sean, you’re up!”
Chapter Nineteen
Great. Both Adam and Toby seemed in a mood.
Tonight was not turning out to be ideal. The rest of the night went by with a certain lack of drama. I just sat and watched the boys play pool, drank too much soft drink and tried to forget about Ellie.
They tried to coax me into playing pool, but my heart wasn’t in it. Adam snapped out of his bad mood after a little while, never one to hold a grudge, but Toby seemed a little off, just like he had been when I first walked in. Maybe he was thinking about what Angela was getting up to. Maybe he was annoyed by all the teenage gatecrashing and resented Adam and I even being there. I managed to convince myself that it had something to do with me, to the point I felt utterly miserable and decided to bow out early, say my goodbyes and go home.
Adam agreed to walk with me, and then the Onslow Boys had had enough too and decided to walk with us back to the Onslow.
Stan walked us out to the gates, he had his hands in his pockets, shoulders slumped, forehead furrowed; he looked like he had seen better days. I wanted to tell him to forget Ellie, to say something that would make him feel better, but I had nothing to add. Probably just as well because now, surrounded by his mates, was not the time or place.
We navigated our way through the darkened streets, the four of us walked the long stretch back to the Onslow Hotel. I only hoped that we wouldn’t bump into Ellie on the way.
Sean talked a lot, mostly just to drown out our gloomy silence.
Adam and even Toby added additional remarks on the fishing at the weir, but I zoned out midway, setting a fast pace, eager to end the night. If they thought I was quiet, no one said anything. They might have thought I was upset over the Scott incident or Ellie. I doubted they would ever suspect in a million years that it was actually because I feared that any ground I’d made today with Toby was lost. I would go home and he would go home and Angela would probably get dropped off at his place tonight. I felt sick to my stomach. And angry. How could I have been so stupid? I knew he had a girlfriend. There was no way me and Toby could end well.
It had been great of Sean to defend my honour, but in all honesty I was a little put out that it hadn’t been Toby. Of course, it wouldn’t have worked because everyone knew he was with Angela. Still, I wondered if he was annoyed at Sean, dragging him into it. Who knew? All I knew was every time I tried to catch his eye he would make an effort to avoid mine. He walked on the opposite side of our group, Adam and Sean between us. I didn’t know what his problem was but all of a sudden I didn’t care as I could see the glowing window lights of the Onslow Hotel. It wasn’t quite twelve yet, so there was still time for a lock-in. It occurred to me this was probably their plan: play more pool, reclaim the jukebox and say goodbye to us pesky teenagers.
Adam was crashing the night at the Onslow. He had his pick of the rooms upstairs as most tourists stayed in the holiday parks rather than stay at a pub with its overpriced, un-refurbished rooms. So vacancies were pretty high at the Onslow, they made more money out of meals and the bar than having to worry too greatly about accommodation. Uncle Eric didn’t have much flair for such things and Claire Henderson was never around. I gathered she must have been present at some stage as there were touches of her taste dotted all around the restaurant. John Waterhouse paintings lined the walls, a shiny black grand piano, plush mahogany and cream rugs with black fringed borders, antique-style furnishings and subtle lighting added for ambience. The woman was highly strung, but I couldn’t fault her taste.
Sean and Toby walked in the open door heading straight for the main bar. I paused outside and Adam hovered, waiting for me as I dialed my mobile.
Ellie’s phone went straight to voice message, and I sighed in irritation as I waited for the beep.
“If you received this message I can only assume you haven’t been murdered and buried in a shallow grave somewhere. It’s 11.40 and I’m heading home.”
“How you getting home?” Adam asked.
“It’s a nice night.” I shrugged. “I’ll walk.”
“And you’re worried about Ellie being murdered.”
“I’ll be fine, I’ve done it a million times from yours and Ellie’s houses before.”
“That wasn’t quite so far.”
“Stop being an old woman.”
“I can’t help it, I’ve been hanging with one for too long.”
“Well, you are who you hang with.”
“Well, in that case don’t go turning into an Onslow Boy, you’re too pretty for that.”
“I don’t need to turn into one, I’m dating one, apparently.”
Adam grimaced. “Yeah, well, that’s going to be around like wild fire by tomorrow. Hope no one congratulates your parents for gaining a new twenty-two-year-old son-in-law.”
My smile dropped from my face. “Oh God. I didn’t think of that.”
Adam nodded. “Oh, I did.”
I bit my lip. “Man, if Mum and Dad hear that, I’ll have my arm in a plaster cast like yours with ‘grounded for all eternity’ marked on it.”
“And Sean will be fish food.”
“Or pie filling.” I cringed.
“I’ll walk you home.”
“No, no, no … You’re on a good behaviour bond, remember. Just stay here, I’ll be fine. Most of the moon is up. It’s light and a nice night. I’ll be okay.”
“I’ll get Chris to run you home.”
“Will you stop? Chris is busy. I. Will. Be. Fine.” I kissed him on the cheek. “Goodnight.”
“What, no tongue?” He smiled wickedly.
“Shut up! Or I’ll get my big twenty-two-year-old footy-playing boyfriend to beat the crap out of you.”
Adam imitated Scott to a T, fidgeting and gulping in a convulsive way that had me laughing until it hurt.
“Night, Bozo.” I backed away, knowing that if I didn’t he would talk me into letting him walk me home. He looked at me with an uncertain frown on his face.
“Text me a progress report on the way home, I want landmarks and updates until
your foot is in your front door, you hear me?”
“Yeah, yeah.”
Once again, I made my way down Coronary Hill, leaving the distant weekend noises of the hotel behind me. I managed one look back when I reached the bottom; Adam was a speck on the verandah silhouetted by golden light. I knew he would stay there until I was out of sight. As soon as I made my way around the bend and hit Main Street, I texted him.
To: Adam
Turned a corner happy now?
He texted back.
To: Tess
Yes! Now go on, git!
I strolled leisurely along Main Street. Onslow was relatively well lit in this part of town, but the moon hung like a beacon lighting the way in darker spots, and I never once felt afraid. I knew this town like the back of my hand, it was as much a part of me as was the smaller territory of Perry which housed nothing more than a milk bar, a post office, and Mum and Dad’s cafe on the edge.
I texted Adam again as promised.
To: Adam
Brimstone Street. Still alive.
There were still a couple of cars around, mostly young joy riders, but they paid me little attention, their music up full, probably headed for McLean’s Beach or up to the Point to go parking.
It took me no time to make it to the fluro lights of the 24-hour Caltex. I texted Adam the breakthrough.
To: Adam
Pit stop at the Caltex. Yay!!
I perused the shelves, but didn’t find anything of interest. I went to the ladies’ room where the fluro lights continued, highlighting the dark circles under my eyes from smudged eyeliner and my hair all curled with the humidity of the night. I saw very little point in making any touch-ups aside from my lip smacker. As I went to dry my hands with the towel dispenser I glanced to my right and froze midstep. There, mounted on the wall, was the condom vending machine. It brought back a memory of when Ellie and I had come in here one afternoon after being at the lake all day. We were in Year Seven and we saw this very same machine. We dared each other to put in some coinage and get one out each. We giggled while we did the unthinkable. We held the silver foiled wrappers in our hands like it was this wondrous, mysterious thing, which it was. Then Ellie said we should have a competition, see who would be the first one with a chance to use it. She was all wide eyed in excitement.
“Okay,” I agreed, feeling like a daredevil, even though we both knew Ellie would win. I hadn’t even kissed a boy, whereas Ellie definitely had. We giggled as we got one for Adam as a joke. We put them in our Hang Ten wallets, bought ice creams and went on our merry way. That night at dinner I couldn’t take my mind off the ‘thing’ in my wallet. It felt like it was burning through my pocket. The very sin of it. I was so sure Mum and Dad knew what I was up to. I didn’t eat much, for the fear of looking them in the eye. After tea, I went straight to my room and took the foil square out of my wallet and hid it in the shoebox with all of my other keepsakes that I hid in the back of my wardrobe. I breathed a sigh of relief, but jumped out of my skin when Mum knocked on the door.
“Tess hon, Monkey Magic is on.” If I didn’t go and watch my favourite show like I did every other night, they would definitely know something was up.
For weeks, every night before I went to bed, I peeped into my shoebox, secretly smiling at the thrill of rebellion I felt by possessing something so forbidden. I didn’t know how Ellie felt, although I knew for a fact she carried it with her because she was bragging to the girls in the school toilets and showing them.
Adam, on the other hand, thought it hilarious and broke straight into it as we sat on the banks of Lake Onslow in our secret place we used to go swimming and fishing. He thought it brilliant to put over his head and blow it up so it expanded into a big white dome.
“You really are a dickhead, Adam,” Ellie had laughed, which caused him to laugh and the condom went flying off his head. I picked it up with a stick, Ellie and I both looking at it with wide, horrified eyes at the sheer size of it. I gulped and we both tilted our heads in wonder.
“Surely it’s stretched.” Ellie looked on in distaste.
Adam was lying on his back, squinting at the wrapper.
“It says extra extra large,” he sighed. “Gee, I hope it fits.”
He threw a cheeky smile our way.
“It does not say that,” I snatched it off him.
He just shrugged, put his hands behind his head and closed his eyes, lying in the sun. It was then that my breath hitched as I read the packet.
“What does it say?” Ellie whispered, moving closer, balancing the parachute on her stick. I swallowed hard and looked at Ellie in dismay.
“It says regular,” I whispered, and we both turned to look at the limp white rubber thing on the end of the stick.
“Jesus!”
I smiled at the memory of how excited we had been over such a thing. Ellie now popped coins in it like it was a gumball machine. I even noticed Adam’s flash of the infamous square foil in his wallet when he paid for things.
I knew Adam had done it when he went out with Nicky Briggs last year for eight months. They were all over each other, and he was forever catching the bus to her house after school. I was secretly jealous of Nicky taking up so much of Adam’s time and when I overheard Nicky and Adam had done it, I unexpectedly felt a deep misery. I felt like I was the last standing virgin alive. Which was actually most likely true.
I put a coin in the slot and pulled the lever, then grabbed the foil packet that fell out. A different kind of thrill surged through me as I held it now. When I was in Year Seven, I often wondered who my first would be, but never really into the scary technicalities like I did now. Ellie often told me details of her being with boys, and although it embarrassed me, I was also fascinated at the same time.
“Does it hurt?”
“At first,” she had said, “but then it’s better and better.” She smiled dreamily. “Honestly, Tess, you don’t know what you’re missing out on.”
I placed the condom in the inner pocket of my handbag where I kept my compact. I didn’t exactly want anyone to recognise that unmistakable flash of silver that I had seen in boys’ wallets all over Onslow. And then I thought, what difference did it make? According to the population, as of tomorrow, I had been sleeping with Sean Murphy. My stomach did a little flip at the thought of being so intimate with the likes of Sean. I shook my head; hanging around condom vending machines was sending me crazy. That or the fluro lighting.
As the automatic doors opened, and I stepped out of the Caltex, I froze stock still. A familiar navy Ford ute was parked in front of the shop. It was unmistakable, as its owner was leaning casually against the car door, his arms folded with almost an air or amusement, as if to say, “Fancy meeting you here.”
“Adam said you were walking home, nice night for a murder.”
I rolled my eyes. Traitor.
“What is with you guys and murder?”
“I watch Crime Stoppers.”
“Yeah, well, so do I and apparently Mafia-affiliated men driving navy pickup utes are to be avoided at all costs.”
“Is that so?” he smirked. He was back.
“Afraid so.” I tried not to give up my smile so easily, but it was difficult when his was so damn contagious.
He raised his brows, sighed and straightened from his casual lean to shoving his hands in his pockets, glancing back at his ute.
“Well, this is awkward.”
He walked to the passenger door and opened it, waving his hand in the direction of the interior.
“Deal’s a deal!”
I looked down at my feet. “Um …”
“If you’re wondering about my drinking, I was drinking Coke for the last four hours. I’m good to go.”
Had he really? I frowned, trying to remember the pool game at Stan’s, but other things must have distracted me. Every time I looked at Toby, it wasn’t to check out what he was drinking.
“You didn’t not drink because of me, did you?”
That caught him off guard. He glanced at the Caltex roof, his shoes, then back at me.
“Well, a deal’s a deal.”
My shoulders slumped, mortified. He had sacrificed a night out with his mates to play chauffeur to me because of our stupid bet. I bit my lip; the look of dismay must have been all over my face.
“Hey, Tess, I don’t mind, it’s no big deal.”
“I didn’t want to ruin your night.”
“You didn’t,” he said earnestly.
“I feel awful, I don’t mean for you to think that –”
“Tess!”
He cut off my rambling and pointed.
“Get in the bloody car.”
Chapter Twenty
I was in Toby’s car. Again!
We drove around the streets of Onslow with the windows wound down, the summer breeze blowing my hair.
José Feliciano was on the radio crooning out his version of ‘California Dreaming’ and I thought I would die from happiness. I looked at Toby’s profile as we pulled up to the only set of lights in the whole town, and he tapped his fingers on the steering wheel.
He caught me watching him. “What?” he smirked.
The breeze had been cool on my skin but now we had stopped, the warmth in the air came back to me.
I looked at him, really looked at him. The glow of the streetlights behind him … I didn’t know what to say. My gaze flicked to the bow of his lips, and I quickly glanced away.
I looked at my hands that fidgeted in my lap. “So you’re not mad at me anymore?”
Before he could respond a sounding horn blasted from behind us. The lights had changed, rocking Toby into motion. As we moved our way forward and back into the present, my phone rang and Adam flashed up on the screen.
“Hello?”
“Are you a ghost speaking from the afterlife?”
Toby threw me a questioning look. I mouthed ‘Adam’, then realised maybe he was still trying to decipher what I had just said to him. Something I regretted as soon as the words left my mouth, that’s what. I was after affirmation, the kind only insecure teenage girls would ask for, and that was the last thing I wanted to come across as.